Does it smell in here or it just you?

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I've got candy.

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"Hi. You're looking mightily mediocre and I would like to buy you a medium priced drink."

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Man: Are you from heaven? Man: Cause ive got an erection

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good thing i got my library card cuz im checking you out. i hate people who have library cards.

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"You look like Carmen Electra's deformed, burned, dismembered sister..."

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Are you from Austrailia? Because I'd like to put my tongue in your butthole

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Hello, it's nice to meet you.

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Girl are your parents Mexican, cuz you look Mexican.

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M. Haven't I seen you some place before? W. That's why I don't go there anymore

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Are you an angel? ... cause I have an erection!

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At some random bar: Man: I am Duke Nukem! Woman: DISGUSTING! Man: Huh? Moral: Sometimes you have to play the new games to understand the old...

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This doesn't have to be a rape.

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- I think i lost my number, can i have yours? - I think i lost my number too.

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do you work at subway? 'cause you give me foot long. i'll do you a favour and cut it up

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If you and I were squirrels, I'd bust a nut in that hole.

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Girl - You smell nice, what have you got on? Boy - I have a hardon but i didn't think you could smell it.

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Hey good looking, what some mayonnaise?

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I put the STD in Stud all I need is U

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Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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why was the girl stupid beacuse she had brain sergy

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A man walks up to the woman, and says, "I'd like to take you on a date. How about dinner tonight?" The woman agrees, and they both have a wonderful time at a fancy Italian restaurant.

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Man- Hey, baby, wanna come back to my house for some pizza and sex? Woman- No! Man- What's wrong, you don't like pizza?

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At a cemetery: Girl: This place is so creepy at night... I should have left sooner... Man: RAWRGH! BRAAAAAAAAAAINS!!!!!!! Girl: EEEEEEEEEEEEK! (runs away) Man *takes off makeup and fake blood* Man; Well, I guess that did not work... Moral: If they dont like you while you are alive, there are always un-dead options...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!