Huge blue man: I AM THE APOCALYPSE! YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE! Woman: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! Huge blue man: "facepalm" THIS GAME, IS OVER! Moral: Dont start out too strong...

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Hey i got a job for you. But it blows.

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he got me some KY jelly for valentines day saying it was going to make me the happiest woman in the world he was right one squirt of that stuff on my doorknob and he couldn't get in no matter how hard he tried

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Girl: How come you never look at me when we make love? Guy: Your face is taking away the memory of your sister's.

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Your body would look good in my trunk.

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-Heyyy there (; -Im lesbian.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? 1000 pounds

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you know what rhymes with hug me LET'S HAVE SEX

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You are almost as beautiful as my mother.

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"Wow, you look so thin! Are you wearing a girdle?"

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M: What's your name? W: Jenny. M: What's your number? W: eight-six-seven-five-three-oh-ni-yie-yen

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I might not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you

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I also got a phd. Awesome in what? Uh wait, is phd and std the same? Wait I mean... Moral: Just leave you dont want to find out the wrong way.

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Is that a ladder in your tights or are you just a cheap whore?!

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Aww seriously dude? That would be awesome, gotta warn you though, this car repair dude, is really ripping my shirt off but you know, ill send you the bill. 666 (my phone is on the charger, get me a new one and ill write a fucking essay about my sisters ass and post it here I really need a phone)

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Man: Is your name sherly? Woman: No... Man: because id like to Fuc* you in the ass and call you sherly

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Girl: You know I've never kissed a boy....... Boy: Me too

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Hey you've got the most beautiful f*cked up teeth I've ever seen.

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Woman: Seriously you are like the perfect man, I barely even met you and want to marry you already! What is your name by the way? Guy: My name is Le Petite Chessedeburger Withnowhitesauce! Woman: I am gay by the way, gotta go feed my uh... my wife yeah my wife.

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I hate you already.

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You must be tired... I assume you are because I am after following you on your four mile run through the park today.

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I told my wife I met someone who looked just like her she asked Was she gorgeous I didn't know what to say.

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Man: I wanna know what love iiiiiiis... And I want you to show meeeeeeeeee! *Woman slams man with baseball bat* Man: Urgh... ARGH MY FACE BLEEDING EVERYWHERE! WHYYYY! Woman: I love baseball! Moral: Stupid singing idiot, if that is not the worst pick up line ever, then some other is!

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Im tired of fapping... wanna help me get some variation?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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