- Anti-Pickup Line

I'll never forget the day I swept you off of my feet.

Superman enters a bar: Superman: Ladies... who wants to try out my newly developed "super orgasmi-power"? Women: Did you not die? Superman: Uh no... it was just a uh... healing coma... All the women fall into a "healing coma Superman: scratches head Well... I kinda asked for this... Moral:Healing coma

roses are red violets are blue i have a knife get in the van

male:hey what that between your leggs female: my sisters penis

I wish my sister was as hot as you.

Guy: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl: No, but it will hurt when I pepper spray you.

-Get in the Van

Me: You know what bitch... You are burp such a bitch... That I am just gonna smear peanut butter on my crotch and... Lady: Dude, I am a man but okay! Me: You are a guy? Did you have to tell me that? I mean I got beer googles but I hear perfectly well! Then his girlfriend which happened to be my cousin showed up and... facepalm

Nice Shirt. It would look better on my bedroom floor.

Can I have your number? -I don't have one.

- Does this napkin smell like chloroform to you? There is no response because she passed out from it and he leaves in order to void suspicion.

- I would go to the end of the world for you. - Yes, but would you stay there, please?

Man: May I have this dance? Woman: Take it, it's all yours [goes away]

I just told Rebecca that the average man gets laid with about seven women during his life... ...She stares me in the eyes and goes "Noo! Really?" I mean should I feel cool? Is it because she has seen me with more women than... I dunno many, or because... Pssst: Harris... I mean you know I uh... Cherry pie this one right? Does this mean she goes around a lot doing a lot of other guys DAD!? (He calls me SON for like every third word, so yeah DAD... She is giving me a cold st... And she failed to take the laptop away from me, its kinda neat you know, typing while two girls cant share a... Well medium plus size dick... I mean... Wow they are making out... Imma gone forever. My fuckcount: Hell I know, when they say a guy bangs seven chicks during their lifetime, do they mean like a week? At once? Jk, I just pity the guys, for each extra gal for me, means one less for you right? Think positive folks, someone has to please them properly... Rebecca is like all "please sir?" "Thank you kind sir" (I hate being called kind) But in bed, she is all like FUCK ME HARDER YOU FUCKING MORON! Did I mention she has a sweet ass, and that my laptop is burning on her now... Multitasking: The key to threesomes, foursomes, fivesomes... I mean I wont say how many women I have done (rather been done by honestly) at once, why? Because you would never believe me. TWELVE... Eleven one wussed out actually because she just said it so she would look "cool among her friends... Poor little bitch..." Anyway, still twelve.

Guy: Do you like me? Girl: No Guy: ..... Girl: You didn't ask me if I loved you! Guy: Do you love me? :D Girl: No

Guy: Hey would you like to dance? Girl: No! Guy: Oh come on! Don't be picky. I wasn't!

HEY BITCH! GET YOUR ASS HOME AND GIVE ME A THUMBS UPS AT HORSEHEAD NETWORK! Moral: And be rewarded ;) (unless you are fucking ugly, then you still get the gift of voting me whatever way you want)

-Are you the sun? -No.. Why? -Because you need to stay 93,000,000 miles away from me.

You look like a dog... Wana bone?

This tux is rented by the hour, are you?

Man and girl talking: Girl: ARE YOU GETTING A HARDON? Man: You think I am a pervert or something? Of course not! Its just the hamster I keep between my ballsack!

Roses are red Violets are blue Go out with me Or you face'll be those colors, too!

He: Hey bay wanna danc- She: Leave.

"You look like an angel that fell from heaven and hit its face on the pavement."

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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