- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Hey babe, are your parents arseholes? Because your the shit.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I right next to each other. You say that you want me? Well don't what you come for!!

you have your job, I have mine, so let's do it in the kitchen

Has someone been following you? Cause I've been seeing people behind your back.

The word of the day is ass, lets go upstairs and observe the word.

If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put you and that other girl together.

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When a tractor fell on your face?

Are you from tennessee? Cuz it looks like your missing some teeth.

Does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

“Why, look at me. I've worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.” ? Groucho Marx

Whenever I look at stars I think of you... Because your only beatiful from a distance.

rohypnol. rape drug

Woman: lol you are get nervous when I speak to you! Man: Yeah, I get nervous when fucking ugly attention seeking bitches speak to me, nothing personal its just you being a fucking ugly attention seeking bitch which happens to be speaking to me. Moral: Flawless Victory.

-How did your date go last night? -It was going alright but then I started crying uncontrollably. -Nervous habit? -Pepper spray.

Damn you look good in beer goggles.

Are you from Tennessee? Because your accent sounds stupid.

hey angel you duh sexy , if you duh rice i eat you everyday-pha haha

How much does a polar bear weight? Enough to break the ice... and throw you into the freezing water and drown you, because you're really ugly.

Man: Hey, I've been kinda watching you through the night and I'd really be mad if I didn't talk to you tonight. So um, do you want to grab a bite to eat sometime or something? Woman: I'm married but you seem like a nice guy so yea... yea, I'd like that alot.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm using my hand but thinking of you ;)

Man:Hey, do you know what chloroform smells like? Woman:No. Man:Well, you're about to find out.

Girl, do you believe in love by first sight? Uh maybe... Okay, let me see if those titties of you are real or wonderbra or silicone or whatever... Moral: You are fantastic, you know who you remind me of? Myself ;)

-Your feet must be tired 'cuz you've been running through my mind. -Yea, I was running away from you.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book