Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

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HE ; " MY NAME'S BOND, JAMES BOND" SHE;" MY NAME'S ****, **** OFF!"

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What's the difference between a Jew and a boyscout? The boyscout returned from camp.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I right next to each other. You say that you want me? Well don't what you come for!!

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He: Do you like aardvarks? She: No. He: Neither do I, I'm Harold...

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For the males that do not know what I mean with "woman screams" comment below... well HAHAHAHAHAH LOSERS LOOOOOOOOOOOSEEEEEEEEERS! Moral: Read a book about females more interesting parts one day you lazy bastard... as for the girls... I am not talking about anything bad nor dirty... just 12 hour orgasms and such nice things... WHAT? YOU GONNA TELL ME THAT IS HORRIBLE? Well in that case you dont know what you are missing... and you wont ever know.... Ps: Can you believe I am actually trying to get thumbs downs but keep getting upped? Thanks for accepting my ever growing controversial nature, lets keep it that way and soon moral man will uh... receive a medal for uh... well a small keychain for... uh... you know what? Never mind.

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? nwaaahhh *blushing or something* Because it looks like you landed on your face.

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-hey baby wanna get a drink? -no but i wanna get the heck away from you

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I put the STD in Stud all I need is U

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put 'U' and 'I' together. -If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would take 'U' out entirely.

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You are the personification of beauty. ,..Wanna Shag?

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Nice Shirt. It would look better on my bedroom floor.

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Hey girl, is your name Ethiopian food? Because your playing hard to get.

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Boy:can i go out with you? Girl: no

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B:wanna go out sometime? G:I'll go out now and get away from you.

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I'm jealous of every girl that hugs you, Because for that one second she held my entire world.

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are you on fire?

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As long as I have a face, you will always have a place to sit.

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Flipping a coin to give you my number or not to give you my number

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I'm an Ice Bear, I guess i just broke the "ICE" between us ....

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On a scale from one to ten, you're about a two.

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It's not Rape* If you yell surprise.

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Man: Wanna come home watch my REALLY big stamp collection? ;) ;) Girl: Sure ;) ;) At home: Man: Why are you taking your clothes off? Girl: Uh... nevermind... Moments later: Man: And this one is a rare misprint from 1980, and this one is actually quite common but.., Girl: Sigh... :(

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Are your parents retarded? Because you're something special

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!