-What would you say if I asked you to marry me? -Nothing. I can’t talk and laugh at the same time.

You must be tired... I assume you are because I am after following you on your four mile run through the park today.

-You must be tired, you've been running through my mind all day. -You look like a rapist.

-Hi. Didn’t we go on a date once? Or was it twice? -Must’ve been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

Male: I would die for you... Female: Prove it

"Do you like me?" "Do pigs fly?"

-Can I have your name? -Why? Don’t you already have one?

Would you like to be the lone mother of my children?

(in a loud club) -Do you wanna dance?! -Umm, with YOU? NO! -What?! oh no, i said, "you look FAT in those PANTS!"

(Based on a few real life experiences) Man: Hey girl wanna hang out an.. Girl: OMG IMMA ORGASMIN YES I COME WIT YOU AND WE HAVE WILD SAX IN MAH DERTY PUSSY AND THEN YOU LIKK MY ASS GOOD AND CLEEN! Man: Uh... I think I left my wallet im my pocket... which I think is in my fridge.. at home... gotta go before the house burns down you know... "runs off"

Did it hurt? When you fell from the hoe tree and banged every dick on the way down?

Man: Do you like a sensitive guy? Women: Yeah, I used to be one.

Your eyes are the color of my toilet water.

-Go on ,don’t be shy. Ask me out. -Okay, get out.

Why did the small girl run away? She saw her own coqu in the mirror.

He says "Where have you been all my life" She says "Hiding from you....how the hell did you find me?"

Male: Get in the van.

Do you come here often? Because you're usually working the streets whenever I see you.

What's your favorite condiment? Mine's mayonaise.

- If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. - Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Van what van? GET TO THE CHOPPAH!

- I want to give myself to you. - Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.

- I know how to please a woman. - Then please leave me alone.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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