-As I slipped my finger in her hole I could feel her getting wetter and wetter, When I pulled it out she was going down on me. I should probably start looking for a new boat...

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Man and girl talking: Girl: ARE YOU GETTING A HARDON? Man: You think I am a pervert or something? Of course not! Its just the hamster I keep between my ballsack!

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i am with stupid l l l \/

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- Hey, I have 40 minutes to live and need to feel the touch of a woman to live. -I'm a dude.

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MAN: You wanna know what's beautiful? Read the first word again. WOMAN: You wanna know what's desperate? Read the first word again!

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If your right leg was Thanksgiving and your left leg was Christmas, could i come between the holidays?

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I like my women like I like my coffee I drink Tea

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hi how u doin fine and u well bii have a nice day DONT TELL ME WHAT TO DO

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B: Hey C do you wanna go out with me? C: Sorry B I only go out with guy's who come after me

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Ever kissed a bunny inbetween the ears? Nope. I'm allergic to them.

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Hey, are you an angel? Because you smell like you've been dead for a while

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Whatever I'll just date myself.

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Guy: Hey babe, do you have a GPS... I'm lost in your eyes. Girl: Make a U-Turn

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Hi! Do you like fat guys with no money?

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You're one-in-a-million. That means there is roughly 7,000 people exactly like you in the world.

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Every breath you take Every move you make Every bond you break Every step you take I'll be watching you Every single day Every word you say Every game you play Every night you stay I'll be watching you

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Dating post: "Nice male looking for female company, I have a steady job and would prefer if you too had a job, you will be particularity happy if you have a small penis fetish. Signed BIGPENIS19INCHESJIMlight sleeper

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GUY- Are you from heaven.....cuz it sure as hell doesn't look like it.

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-Hey baby wanna paint the whole town red? -Yeah, with your blood

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How much do you like peanut butter?

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Boy : Gurle: hi

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Hey girl, do you have a map? Becuase I keep getting lost when i try to find your house.

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Get in the van.

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Super man and Lois lane doing it... Supes: WOMAN I AM SO uh.. tHORNY that I want to thrust as hard as I can and... Lois: YAAAAAAAAAAARGH! Supes: Oh noes! R.I.P Lois Lane... Ripped In Pieces Indeed... Moral: Hey at least moral man can get laid... (a moral man fake... well actually original)

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!