Hey Baby, Whats your name? Dave ...(silence)...

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Girl, do you believe in love by first sight? Uh maybe... Okay, let me see if those titties of you are real or wonderbra or silicone or whatever... Moral: You are fantastic, you know who you remind me of? Myself ;)

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Talk to me or I'll burn your face with this acid.

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Male: It's super hard and long. Female: I have always been under the impression that the GED is relatively simple.

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I am terribly sorry for talking to you, but I was wondering if...

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Guy: Hey, I think you're really sweet... Girl: Aww, thanks Guy: Is that why you're so fat?

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Guy: Are you an angel? Girl: Wait till I die, i'll be one.

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Man at bar: Hey girls... want my banana in your pajamas? ;) ;) ;) Girls: YEAH! Man: "thinks for himself..."... man I never get this reaction from girls.. you are a bunch of skanks and sluts... (leaves the bar) In the end, we are never happy with what we get are we? yeah... this is kinda the moral of this story... (Ps: My banana in your pajamas... I got a girlfriend, but someday Im gonna try that pick up line... hahahaha

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Hey, are you an angel? Because you smell like you've been dead for a while

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So you want tonight to be consensual or not?

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-Wanna go to my place? -Actually, I was gonna ask you the same question. -Really? Where do you live? -In a sexual harassment class.

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Man: I am willing to give my life for you. Woman: How about you fucking get one instead and rather seek me out then? Moral: M-M-M-Morale breaker!

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I like my women like I like my coffee I drink Tea

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -To get to the other side.

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He: Do you like aardvarks? She: No. He: Neither do I, I'm Harold...

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Tenth year anniversary Marriage. So what was your name again? Annoying Bitch? Old Hag? I forgot...

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Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

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can i take a dump in your mouth?

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Man and woman in bed, as the man looks troubled: Woman: Hey you are not in the mood? Whats wrong? Man looking down his pants: SNAKE! ANSWER ME! SNAKE WHATS WRONG? SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKEEEEEEEEEEE! Woman: We arent gonna have sex huh? Man looks down pants again: Nuh huh... game over girl... game over...

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Hey baby, you're really hot, I like girls with some meat for my bone.

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- hey ;) - hey, yourself. - if i wanted my comeback, i would've wiped it off your mom's face.

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-How much does a polar bear weigh? -It is impossible to know the exact weight of a polar bear where no scale or bear are present.

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While I am certain that the police consider you a person of interest, I assure you I do not.

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Hey, Are You From Tennessee, Because Your License Plate Says Tennessee.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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