*At a concert* guy- hey if you were that drum set, i'd bang you on that stage all night

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

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You dont need makeup, plastic surgery is really cheap nowadays!

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Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Guy: When you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down

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Boy:can i go out with you? Girl: no

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-How did your date go last night? -It was going alright but then I started crying uncontrollably. -Nervous habit? -Pepper spray.

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I may have never f*cked a 10 before, but I did f*ck five 2's.

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I don't have a library card but do you mind if I check you out?

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I have one thing to say to all the woman who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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Man: Hey babe ;) I may not be the smartest guy around, but look at these muscles! (flexes like crazy). Girl: Sorry, I am blind... Man: Oh... do you hear my sexy raspy voice though? Girl: Sorry I am also deaf... Man: Oh... (leaves) 2 Weeks later: Man: HEY THAT WOMAN TRICKED ME! SHE SAID SHE WAS DEAF BUT WAS CAPABLE OF SPEAKING! DEAF PEOPLE DO NOT SPEAK!.... I think...

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Girl! you are almost as awesome as horsehead network! Moral: I got balls of steel!

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Dont let this rape turn into a murder

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause the ground around you looks like it's cracked.

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Why did the small girl run away? She saw her own coqu in the mirror.

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-Are you an angel? -Yeah...actually I am. I remember you-aren't you the guy that fell out of heaven? So THAT'S why your face is so screwed up.

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- Ma'm, do you have a cigarette? - I don't really want one, I just wanted to start a conversation with you.

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Have you heard of that new movie "Other People"? Cuz thats what i wanna see.

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Male: Hey babe! Wanna come to my house for a party? Female: Sorry! Don't have my herpes shot!

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I'm desperate, you'll do.

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Female: Why? Male: Cus you look like an inbred hick

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-Did it hurt -What when i fell from heaven? -No when you fell from the ugly tree and hit every single branch on the way down

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He: pick a number between 1 and 10 Her: 8 He: you lose take your top-off!

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Is there someone behind you? cause im seeing people behind your back

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M: Woah I am drunk baby... But I gotta say... you`re the hottest bitch in town! B: Bark bark!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!