The word of the day is legs. Lets go to your place and spread the word

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Man: So you will come home with me later? Girl: Sure! Man: Great then ill just go find more women I can bang later in the meantime... Moral: Depending of the kind of woman, this is of no consequence...

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-If I take you home, will you iron my clothes and make me a sandwich?

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- I know how to please a woman. - Then please leave me alone.

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If your happy and you know it clap your hands!! What if I lost my hands in Nam while I was singing this song and a plane killed my friend causing me to ct off both of my hands?

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Are you from Tennessee? Because I have a lot of family that lives there, maybe we're related.

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How much per quarter hour? Actually do you do 10 minute blocks?

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Man: Hey sexy, I think I have seen you many times before... Woman: Hmmm... I do not think I have seen you before... Man: Do you happen to be used to getting raped? Woman:...... Moral: yeah it was her :( Audience: BOOOOOOOOOO! Moral: I know :(

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"Hey can I get your number?" "-12 Like the inches of your dick."

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause the ground around you looks like it's cracked.

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Im the demanding customer, your Dominos Pizza, I will make you Cum in 30 minutes or less.

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-hey baby whats your sign? -no parking anytime

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Do you believe in love at first hear? Because ive never dated a blind chick before.

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Hey, I your dad a baker?...Cuz it would be really cool if he were a baker.

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- You're so hot, that if you ate a piece of bread, you'd poop out toast! -You're so cold that if you drunk a glass of water, you'd poop out ice.

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Guy: Your eyes are like the stars. Girl: Is it because the way they sparkle? Guy: No because they are really far apart.

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J.B: You smile, I smile. Girl: I wasn't smiling...

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-There's a 'U' in beautiful. -Yeah, and there's a 'U' in ugly.

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The power to type any pointless superpower at the wrong place... ...shit...

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you look fap-fap-fap-fabulous

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Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

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Does it smell in here or it just you?

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Excuse me, is your father a gardener? No. Why? Because he keeps leaving all his dry leaves on my sidewalk please tell him to clear it!

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, id violate your ass hole.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!