are u an angle because i have a boner oh what fail

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why cant you comb your hair cuz you got cancer othere guy :ahahahaah fag

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Woman: Hey is it true you black men have big penises? Black Man: Hell yeah woman! Mine is so big, its at least three times longer than my fist and at least 4 times as wide! Lets go get some hoe! Woman: Uh... well uh... its just that... uh... Moral: Be careful for what you wish for, when fantasy becomes reality... it may hurt....

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"Wow, you look so thin! Are you wearing a girdle?"

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male: wanna come in for a coffea? female: ok (she has a coffea) male: ok by female: by

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You are almost as beautiful as my mother.

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I have a knife, Maddie. Get in the van.

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If I asked you out on a date, would your answer to that question be the same as your answer to this question?

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Come lay your head upon my chest. (After a moment) Perhaps you'd be more comfortable onmy stomache (pushes head down)

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Hey baby you looking for a stud? Cuz I've got the STD and all I need now is U

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you're a fucking hillbilly.

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did it hurt ? did what hurt? when your fell from heaven? because it looks like you landed on your face :O

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Man: Hey sexy girl there... Whats your name? Cena: I am John Cena! I can rap because you can eat.. uh crap... wait I need some allsholes to write some rad lyrics for me here...

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You're so hot I'd do you sober.

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I thought you were cute, so the voices told me to come say hi.

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At bar Man: Uh... um... wanna come home see my star wars board games collection? Woman: SURE! Man: *Heart attack*

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You look... clean

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Those must be space pants, because your ass is out of this world That must be a donkeys tongue, because its making an ass out of you.

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Hey baby, you make me wanna get a job.

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F: I AM SO DRUNK AND HORNY I COULD FUCK ANYONE M: Hey, wanna fuck? F: I SAID ANYONE.. Not anything... Heck I got standards! Moral: Heck she has standards! Her dog is someone!

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Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa what I don't want for Christmas?

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- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

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Guy:I invented troll face oh yea! Girl:you gave my daughter nightmares for weeks you b****!(throws drink in face)

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If I said you had a beautiful body I'd be lying.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!