Babe your dad is an terorist because your a real bomb !!!

thumb_up thumb_down -43

hey,are you a parking ticket? because nobody likes you.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Are you from tennessee? Cuz it looks like your missing some teeth.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

So, you're a girl, huh?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

you look fap-fap-fap-fabulous

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Do you live around here often?

thumb_up thumb_down +157

"Wow, you look so thin! Are you wearing a girdle?"

thumb_up thumb_down +51

If you and I were squirrels, I'd bust a nut in that hole.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

Did it hurt when you fell from the whore tree and banged every single guy on your way down?

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Online Desperate Asians.com Man: Wow you are a cute asian girl! Where are you from? Girl: Thanks my name Aoi is I am from Japan, you look like nice older man! Man: Japan? Awesome! Remember when we nuked the hell out of your country? Happy days! SLAP A JAP! *Connection discontinued* Man: Eh really sorry, I just get nervous when I meet girls especially the cutest ones... Man: hello?

thumb_up thumb_down +66

- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

thumb_up thumb_down +210

HEY BITCH! GET YOUR ASS HOME AND GIVE ME A THUMBS UPS AT HORSEHEAD NETWORK! Moral: And be rewarded ;) (unless you are fucking ugly, then you still get the gift of voting me whatever way you want)

thumb_up thumb_down -13

"Are you a parking ticket?" "What?" "You’ve got fine written all over you"

thumb_up thumb_down +40

I have one thing to say to all the woman who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

MAN: hey babe, do think that mabye someday I and U will be next to each other in the alphebet? WOMAN: well N and O are already, sooo.....

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Ask him nicely to come down, and if that doesn't work, he will most likely stay up there.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

he: hey,do you have a phone? she: yeah! why,do you want it? he: no,you should consider selling it and doing a plastic surgery with the money.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

-Did you just fart? Cause you blew me away.

thumb_up thumb_down -88

Welcome to DIE!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Are you from Austrailia? Because I'd like to put my tongue in your butthole

thumb_up thumb_down +68

GET IN THE VAN!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -53

The word of the day is 'legs'. Wanna come to my place and spread the word?

thumb_up thumb_down +331

H3LL0 Girls, You need some THERAPEY? Call Nero The Moralman For A qualified TheRapist. The number? You wont get it, so then you will go mad with lust and need therapey Moral: Ooooh... I says ANTI Pickup line... Whats that? More Moral: Nothing is immoral! Everything is Moral MORAL MAN!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

You like my boobies ;) Girl: I said no you disgusting fat bastard! Moral: What fucking kind of MOTHERFUCKING MORAL are you expecting to find here?!?

thumb_up thumb_down +132

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!