Are you a dinosaur? Because you look like you got hit by an asteroid.

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Let's not turn this rape into a murder..

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- Professor Dumbledore, where are we? - You're dead, stupid. Snape trolled you.

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Man: (Ugh worst food ever). Girl: U like it? Man: I love it girl! Girl: Aww, I am gonna make this every day ever! Moral: Hey, if she got big tits, then keep lying.

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Why do cops eat donuts so much? Because they are delish

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Tonight might be a convienient night for us to have some intercourse.

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-I can see forever in your eyes. -But all I can see is never in yours.

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Hey wanna have sex and get married! ......... sorry.......

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Sexual harassment, it can be a touchy subject.

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Hey baby, have you ever been to Uranus? No? Well I am about to.

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Dude: Do you have insurance on you ass? Gal: Why? Dude: Because Im about to hit it. Gal: I hope you have insurance on your face (punch).

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-Baby, do you know karate? Your body is kickin'! -I do actually. Would your crotch like a demonstration?

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Real life anti Joke: At my school Me as a teen: Hey, I don't know me, and I don't know you, but we both live at the same private school, how about you come with me later and so I can screw you really hard? Girl: My God I love confident guys, sure! Me: Wha...what? That is not quite what I uh... You mean *blush* really want to have sex with me? I mean I am... co-conifden I mean confident but like really? Girl: Meh, not anymore... Moral: Must have been quite some time ago because it took me years to understand why she refused at the end...

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Those pants are very becoming on you, of course if i were on you id be cumming too.

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Man: There is a U and I in beautiful Woman: Ya, but there is only a U in ugly

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Guy: Can we go on a date? Girl: A date? You couldn't find a date if I handed you a bag of fruit!

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Don't turn this rape into a murder.

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ANYWAY... I have been married for around X years right? (My wife is anon because reasons valid reasons!) And I told my wife "Babe, you know what you got married into baby, how about you and I consider having a third one in the bed... No not a guy, thats disgusting, you agree? Awwride! So anyways, she was like "Uh... Ask me again in a year I need to think things trough, and I want you for myself..." Next week we was fucking my new (back then neighbor) which is 28 or whatever (I dont remember my neighbors name BAHAHA (actual laugher)... Peeps, say what you want about me, ill be the one fucking the prom queen tomorrow... And you know, maybe someone else, sex with more than my waifu the prom queen is addictive, I mean sharing (salive, cum juices) is caring right? Okay, I better stop here, Rebecca (SHADDAP AUTOCORRECT ITS HOW HER NAME IS SPELLED... I guess) is upset... No not because I am typing this, but because I am out here freezing my ballz off smoking her ciggs... Man The great stuff about "decent equipment" is that I dont need all that much energy, just the speed to keep the girls screaming!

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Is your dad a terrorist?? 'Cause you're a sex bomb.

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I lost my Nobel prize, can you help me find it?

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If you were on a shelf at build a bear workshop ....... I would stuff you , except it wouldn't be with cotton

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A couple wanted to try something different in the bedroom, The wife suggests they do it in a 69 position so they get into position but the wife lets one off in the husbands face she apologises and they try again when the wife farts again the husband gets up to leave and says no I don't think I can do this another 67 times!

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Your breast is like a beer holder, you would allow me to store beer in between your breasts, while I talk on the phone

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Don't turn this rape into a murder.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!