Hey there little girl there is a party down my pants you want to come? Oh I'm sorry i don't speak Herpes.

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-Do you believe in love at first sight or do you want me to walk by again? -Yeah, but this time don't stop!

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When a tractor fell on your face?

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Those must be space pants, because your ass is out of this world That must be a donkeys tongue, because its making an ass out of you.

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Man: Hi ladies I am back for more if you know what I mean ;) Ladies: Get lost you damn hippie! The seventies are over! Man: Whaaat? I died for your sins you know! Moral: Ever heard of Jesus`s ladyfriends? There, now you see what I mean.

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-If I take you home, will you iron my clothes and make me a sandwich?

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Hey baby, you like sea food? Because I've got crabs!

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i would drag my balls through miles of broken glass, just to hear you fart through a walkey-talkey

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The word of the day is 'legs'. Wanna come to my place and spread the word?

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Don't worry, I love fat birds....why are you crying?

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Still a better love story than Twilight

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My penis becomes hard and hard when I see your mom, but weak when I see you.

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I'd hit that.... with a truck.

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Male: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Female: did it hurt when they kicked you out of hell?

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-I think you're the best looking girl in here. -Really? Well, I'd better go find the best looking guy then, hadn't I!

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Ask him nicely to come down, and if that doesn't work, he will most likely stay up there.

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WHEN I ACTUALLY DIE SOME PEOPLE ARE GOING TO GET REALLY HAUNTED. Originally Posted at: Collection of Funny WhatsApp Status

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*At a concert* guy- hey if you were that drum set, i'd bang you on that stage all night

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Hey, nice shoes..... Wanna F***?

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Man; Wanna play the rape game? Girl; No Man; That's the spirit

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GUY- Are you from heaven.....cuz it sure as hell doesn't look like it.

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- You're a bombshell! - Too bad it ain't gonna BANG!

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- Does this napkin smell like chloroform to you? There is no response because she passed out from it and he leaves in order to void suspicion.

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do you work at subway? 'cause you give me foot long. i'll do you a favour and cut it up

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!