Sugar-free sugar cookies

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Hey baby me you CHOIN CHOIN under the moonlight..

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-Insert man's line here- -Wanna get laid?- -TOTALLY!- -Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.-

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Girl: I AM SICK of being with you! All you do is invite me to watch sports, and all you have ever treated me to is a six pack of beer and snacks! YOU NEVER TAKE ME SOMEWHERE NICE! Man: Hey hold one man! Get a grip! What do you mean? Girl: We have been dating for over 3 weeks and you have not made a single move on me! Man: Uh... this is awkward buddy, you see I am straight and... Girl: I AM A WOMAN! Man: WHAAAAAAAAAAAT? Really?! NOOOOOOOOOOO!! I mean you have short hair and the biggest mantits I have seen but... Girl: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! Man; But hey, if you have a pussy that is the important par... Hey where did he... I mean she or... whatever go?

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sHe; Theirs a "L" in love. he; and theirs a L in Lick my penis.

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Nero: My name is Nero... Woman: Why I mean you aint black? Nero: Sure about that? Moral: In the Darkness... We are all the same...

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Did it hurt when you fell from the whore tree and banged every single guy on your way down?

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- I know how to please a woman. - Then please leave me alone.

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- Your place or mine? - Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.

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B: Can I have your number ? G: Sure.. 666

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Roses are red Violates are blue Get in the van I have a gun.

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My friends just bet me 50 dollars that I couldn't pick you up if I came over and spoke with you, would you like a few free drinks on their money?

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Have you ever heard of World of Warcraft?

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Ever had violent sex with a murderer/rapist? ;) ;)

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-What would you say if I asked you to marry me? -Nothing. I can’t talk and laugh at the same time.

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Are you a Potato? Because I love Potatoes.

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- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

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Guy: Thanks Girl: Why? Guy: Cuz you made me get rid of that boner

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Are you an electrician? Cuz' you turn me on.

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- Haven't I seen you someplace before? - Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.

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- If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. - Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

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Girl, now I want you to be on top! Okay, what position? DOGGY STYLE! Moral: Sickman Fraud, with that name smart people should listen with one eye open, while geniuses keep their eyes and ears shut.

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Sigh... No I do not have a van... Just get in the plane!

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What do u get when u mix a black a guy and an octopus The best dam cotton pickin machine you'll ever see!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!