guy: wanna make some money? girl: Na, I do it for free, i'm offering free herpes

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Boy: You know the keyboard says that U and I are together. Girl: It also says JK

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- Is this seat empty? - Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I wouldn't it's fine the way it is

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Man: I bet I can scream so loud I can break the walls this post is made of. Woman: Pfff bullshit.. Man: POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!!! Woman: Wow, I wanna go home with you! Man: Sorry, I dont wanna go home with you Moral I dont bang women I "have something to prove to" if ever... heck just ask a woman what makes her cool enough to ask/demand you to prove yourself... and you may just hit the soft spot...

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Woman: Hey hot stuff! Are you new around he... Man: Eh, I am not comfortable with women hitting on me, even hot ones like you, its just uh... awkward and... Woman: uh sorry, its not like I was hitting on you nor anything ;), Why dont you hit on me? Man: Uh... I err.. how you... uh... *the guy proceeds to stare at the floor for the next five minutes then runs out crying* Moral: NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERD!

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If you were a Pokemon I'd choose you!

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Guy: Have you ever been surfing? Girl: No; Yes Guy: Wanna surf in my jizz?

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Him: Nice legs. What time do they open? Her: Members only, I'm afraid,

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man: would u please me with a blowjob girl: cant u be romantic ? man: would please me with a blowjob at the sunset

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Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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i am with stupid l l l \/

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You wanna go somewhere? Yeah, where? The Swingers Association.

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Guy: So do you wanna come over to my place? Girl: Not really but thanks for the offer.

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Dating post: "Nice male looking for female company, I have a steady job and would prefer if you too had a job, you will be particularity happy if you have a small penis fetish. Signed BIGPENIS19INCHESJIMlight sleeper

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Has someone been following you? Cause I've been seeing people behind your back.

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me- hey baby wanna hve sexual intercourse girl- sure because using the word intercourse in a sentence tunrs me on.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, id put my dick in your mouth.

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Do you believe in rape by first sight? Moral: I think its immoral enough as it is already.

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Man: Hey! Are you into stuff like violence robbery rape cheating orgies machismo torture and pedophilia? ;) ;) Girl: WHAT? NO! Man: Ok me neither so you qualify to come home with me. Girl: Well... that honestly makes you better than most of the lot... why not... so yeah lets go!

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GIRL: I bet you say that to all the girls you meet. MAN: How much you want to bet? No wait, I better not make that bet. (or) MAN: Only half the ones I get this far in conversation with. The other half are a little bit easier to get in bed with.

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he: hey,do you have a phone? she: yeah! why,do you want it? he: no,you should consider selling it and doing a plastic surgery with the money.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. When I take a shit I think about you bitch *flushes the toilet*

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Hey baby, are you Star Trek? Because I watch you every night in the darkness.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!