is your name macaulay culkin? cuz you're going home alone.

boy: my dick is 10 inches girl: mine's too

wanna go halves on a b*stard?

- Professor Dumbledore, where are we? - You're dead, stupid. Snape trolled you.

A man comes home from his doctor and tells his wife that he only has 12 hours to live so he asks his wife later that night if they can do it one last time she agrees but after an hour the man wakes his wife and says honey in a few hours I will be dead can we do it again please. So they do it again a few hours later the man wakes his wife again and says dearest since I'm going to die soon can we please? to this the wife says look honey tomorrow I have to get up you don't!

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I wouldn't.

Do you like a trimmed bush? Because I'm a gardener. Here's my business card, call me, seriously I need the work.

-can i buy you a drink? i buy you a taxi?

Boy: So...Um...How's life? Girl: Great, until you came along.

Do women shake the petrol pump after filling or is that just a guy thing?

Wanna come home to my star destroyer and play with my lightsaber? No? How about just a trip down the Enterprise bridge to have fun with my romulans?... if you know what I mean? ;) ;)

Hey wanna smash pissers?

Hey baby, if I could rearrange the alphabet U and I would have sex.

i would traval the earth for you. well then im going to the moon.

Are you an angel? ... cause I have an erection!

This one is for the ladies: Man: If I could put 6 and 9 on my calculator we would have the greatest time ever ;) Woman: If you did that id just put 911 on my cellphone.

Man - Hey you're kinda pretty! Woman - Um thanks... Man - Whoa slow down! I said kinda.

girl:go away! boy:okay girl:i need space boy:okay just one meter girl: no i"m not kidding boy:i know girl:my mother hate's you boy:i hate her too.! girl:we are now break boy:okay i"m hungry lets eat! girl:you don't understand me boy:no i"m understand you girl:you are philosopher i hate you boy:what? girl:nothing at the end of the story they loved each other

Q: How did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

-Can I have your name? -Why? Don’t you already have one?

Guy: Hey baby, did you come by car? Girl: No I walked. Guy: Well I can make you come in mine.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I right next to each other. You say that you want me? Well don't what you come for!!

If you go out with me there might be some smegma in it for you.

the word of the day is legs lets go to your house and spread the word

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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