Hey babe, are your parents arseholes? Because your the shit.

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you know what rhymes with hug me LET'S HAVE SEX

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Sorry, I don't wanna date a guy who's best pickup line is cocaine.

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Superman enters a bar: Superman: Ladies... who wants to try out my newly developed "super orgasmi-power"? Women: Did you not die? Superman: Uh no... it was just a uh... healing coma... *All the women fall into a "healing coma* Superman: *scratches head* Well... I kinda asked for this... Moral:*Healing coma*

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Man: Hey, you dont look that fucking ugly, wanna go home with me? mirror: *shatters* Moral: If your ugliness ever shatters your mirror let me know, ill look at it and it will assemble itself back on its own.

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Yeah, because I landed on a mailbox, and hit the area between my legs really hard. It's a mess down there. Blood everywhere. And something's oozing, but I don't know what the liquid coming out is. *person who spoke first runs away. bystanders laugh*

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This doesn't have to be a rape.

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Man:Are you in college? Woman:Yeah. Berry College. Lots of cows... Man:Well my name is Murad. You know, like, Moo to the radical. Moo, like, cows...

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hey baby, are you on your menstrual cycle? No i came on my honda!

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I'd take you to the zoo but you might be mistaken for an elephant

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guy: can i rape you? girl: No Guy: great that means any sex we have from now on is consensual, thanks

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HIM: Where have you been all my life? HER: I don't think I was born the first half of it

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Have you ever heard of World of Warcraft?

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Hey giiiiiiiiiiirl, I'm no Flinstone but I can make your bedrock.

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You're hot, I'm ugly. Lets make average babies.

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roses are red violets are blue My dog gives me a bigger orgasm then you

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He: Did it hurt? She: When I fell from heaven? heard it before... He: No, when you fell from the ugly tree!

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Want to get a pizza and fuck? What you don't like pizza?

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Gurl, I'll do you like I do my homework. Slam you on the table and do you all night long!

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If you were my daughter id still be bathing you

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Hello my name is Horny and... oops... I got it wrong didn't I?

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Hey, do you want to dance? No.

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- You look really nice - I know

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-hey girl, you must be a pirate cause you got a lot of booty

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!