It's not rape if you say "Surprise!"

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Girls hate me, they always discuss about how they regret fucking with me over and over again. Moral: Thumb me down, I know ya love me.

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Did you just fart coz you're blowing me away!

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Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Yeah sure, ill just go grab my gag and handcuffs. Male: ...

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Is your dad a terrorist?? 'Cause you're a sex bomb.

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What's a good comeback if a guy asked me "Bring me a sandwich"?? -COmeback with the goddamn sandwich

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Why don't you slip into something more comfortable? Like a coma?

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haha

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-Did you just fart? Cause you blew me away.

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Give me everything tonight, or you might not see tomorrow. RAPIST!

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Hey chicks! I am a very experienced suicide bomber, I was even in the plane that blew up the world trade center A ;) ¨ Moral: This must be the worst pickupline ever for oh so many reasons on so many levels...

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- I can make your bed rock. - Oh yeah? An earthquake can too..

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Boy: can i have your number? Jewish girl *pulls up sleeve*

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Girl: Hi honey, wanna see a magic trick? Boy: Sure, why not? Girl -POOF- YOU'RE SINGLE!

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My friend and I flipped a coin to see who will ask you out and I won.

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“I've been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you.” (Groucho Marx)

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'U' and 'I' together. - No, it's okay. 'N' and 'O' are already together.

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Hey baby, you're really hot, I like girls with some meat for my bone.

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-Do you come here often? -Yeah, but now that you're here, I think I'll find another bar.

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He-Are you from Tennesse? Still He-Cu'z I wanna suck ur face off..

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Adventures of Drunken man with standards 2: Man: Well you are kinda uh... big for me... no offense lady, I mean you are sexy but you are... well fat.. in fact you are TRUCKING HUGE! and I have standards, HIGH STANDARDS ACTUALLY... but since you are so charming and have such a great personality... I guess we can go for it... Kid: Mommy... what is that naked man doing to that blimp? Moral: Standards... we all got them... they are invisible for a reason though...

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"Wow, you look so thin! Are you wearing a girdle?"

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause you d*** sure look like a demon!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!