Man: *Pokes Woman* Ouch! You burned me! Woman: How did I burn you? Man: Because you're just THAT hot. ;) Woman: *Pokes Man* Well it's too bad you're not.

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-I'll do anything,no matter how kinky it is if you can say it in three words. -Clean my house.

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You dont need makeup, plastic surgery is really cheap nowadays!

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Man: I will make the rape on you now woman! Woman: Wow great Borat imitation bravo! Man: Borat who? *draws gun* Moral: Pretty immoral

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Man: Hey you are so pretty I bet you are a hooker! Woman: Uh.. thanks but no.. Man: Damn... I was hoping to get laid tonight...

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on a scale from 1 to 10, when did you lose your virginity?

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when ilfe gives you lemons i squirt the jiuce in my eyes so i dont have to stare at you anymore :)

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Are those space pants? Because no one is going to hear you scream later.

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Man: Hey sexy, I think I have seen you many times before... Woman: Hmmm... I do not think I have seen you before... Man: Do you happen to be used to getting raped? Woman:...... Moral: yeah it was her :( Audience: BOOOOOOOOOO! Moral: I know :(

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Hey girl... U remind me of my pinkie toe.. Ur small cite and I'll probably bang u on the coffee table later

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hey your pretty... pretty ugly!

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- Hey baby! You make my heart beat. - Oh, well you make my stomach churn.

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How do you know where gonna have sex tonight.Im stronger than you.

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Decaffeinated coffee is like a hooker who only wants to cuddle.

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Guy: Hey :) Guy: Hey to you too :) Don't jump to conclusions people. They're gay.

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Are you a Potato? Because I love Potatoes.

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Have you been followed? 'Cuz i've been seeing people behind your back.

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There's a reason why they call my penis the Bunker Buster.

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-Can I get your Number? -29435566 (see if you can get it.)

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When I said bitch, I meant it as a compliment...

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- So what do you do for a living? - I'm a female impersonator.

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If you were a booger, that'd be pretty nasty.

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Glass Basketball

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With the escalating price of rohypnol, most girls aren't worth my attention.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!