guy:do you know how much a polar bear weighs? girl: ..no, how much?? guy:i dunno but probly not as much as you

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Guy: If you look at your keyboard, you see U and I together. Girl: Look underneath. It says JK.

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-Hi how are y... -just a minute, I need to drop a shit, be back in a sec.

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Guy: (Walks up to girl) "I do not think it is a girls body that makes her special, it is her personality that really counts". Girl: "Well that's to bad because you can't have sex with my personality". (Then walks away)

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-Can I buy you a drink? -Go ahead, but only if you buy my boyfriend one too!

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You look like I could use a drink - SMC Digital

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Eyh! its me Black Metal, I seriously cant pay you right now son! Sorry if this comes late this page do not work for shit, (I bet thats why you pick this page you egomaniac son, If you was not full of em charisma id never do this alright?) Okay Overlord, I got your message, hell you know my sister loves you crazy crazy man, why the hell would I try to "hold her away" I mean fuck its banging, so yeah thumbs ups man High five for my sister, its you know, she was super shy before you showed up, now she cant do gym anymore (haha man you so hardcore) but she has lots of friends and you know... So am I absolved now Overlord Black Metal? Moral: Because this guy made me put this, man, you making me feel like a total bitch, good play son!

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How'd you like to earn 14 dollars, the HARD way?

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Man: Would you like to dance? Woman: Hell No! Man: I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me. I said - You look fat in those pants!

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If you were a booger i would pick you Good thing you have no hands

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Damn you look good in beer goggles.

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GUY: are you trash? cuz i'd like to take you out friday night GIRL: are you trash? cuz you smell like it

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I love every bone in your body, especially mine.

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I couldn't help but notice you from the other side of the bar. You look way better from over there.

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"I'd like to get you out of those clothes. Really, they aren't very flattering. That color looks awful on you and those pants make you look fat."

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-Roses are red, violets are... -SHOW ME YOUR TITS

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Have you been followed? 'Cuz i've been seeing people behind your back.

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Sexual harassment, it can be a touchy subject.

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The word of the day is 'legs' , The word of tomorrow is Aardvark .

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Id catch a grenade for ya, but you won't do the same

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Man: Hey is your name Zelda? Woman: Huh? What kind of stupid name is THAT! Man: EXCUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSE ME PRINCESS! Woman: What a dork... Moral: The man did not link with the woman that night... nor ever it seems...

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what's a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?

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Boy- is that a mirror in your pants? Girl-? Boy-because i see my self in your pants Girl-oh this, this is a picture of crap!

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-Hey, baby, What's your sign? -Stop.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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