Do you believe in angels? Cool, what about goblins?

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Hi, I've taken like 8 dumps today... Wanna dance?

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She - Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? becuase your-- He - I did not fall from heaven, you ignorant little twat.

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At a bar... sigh... Woman: Hey cutie wanna go home? "Man" hello I am twelve... what is this? Moral: Hello I am eight... what is this?

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If you were on a shelf at build a bear workshop ....... I would stuff you , except it wouldn't be with cotton

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Ay Girl. Lemme squirtle on yo jigglypuffs

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Nice Shirt. It would look better on my bedroom floor.

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Hey, you want a ride?

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are you on fire?

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-You must be tired, you've been running through my mind all day. -You look like a rapist.

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Man: So you will come home with me later? Girl: Sure! Man: Great then ill just go find more women I can bang later in the meantime... Moral: Depending of the kind of woman, this is of no consequence...

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- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

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Guy: Hey want to hear a joke about my penis? No wait it's too long Girl: Hey want to hear a joke about my vagina? No wait you won't get it.

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Him: I'd go through anything for you. Her: The exit's over there.

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M. you have a sweet pussy. W. WHAT!? M. Your cat, she is very friendly

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I walked into the pub last night with a date and said to the barman, "I'll have a pint of Guinness." My date immediately looked at me and said, "Aren't you forgetting something?" "Of course, how rude of me." I said, "I'll have a pint of Guinness PLEASE."

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I think your cute. I though you were cute, until I saw you...

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Hey, Are You From Tennessee, Because Your License Plate Says Tennessee.

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Are you an angel? ... cause I have an erection!

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Man: Hi ladies I am back for more if you know what I mean ;) Ladies: Get lost you damn hippie! The seventies are over! Man: Whaaat? I died for your sins you know! Moral: Ever heard of Jesus`s ladyfriends? There, now you see what I mean.

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Give me everything tonight, or you might not see tomorrow. RAPIST!

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Mom im sixteen and after watching some japanese cartoons and dads gone, I wonder if I can... Son please put your pants back on! But mom! Im the man in the house now, so I invited my friends so you and I can have a stamina sex contest and... Moral: If she does not tell you to put up your pants... Well, you are the man in the house son ;)

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Your so hot my pants will explode if I don't take them off now...

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I take the the out of psychotherapist

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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