Do you work at subway? Because i often enjoy eating there and i think the food is good. I do not eat there every day because i do not want to get over weight.

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Male: You're so beautiful. Female: Well thank you. Male: Yeah, you look just like my Mom.

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Is there a mirror in your pants? If so, you should shove it up your ass, it would probably make you look better.

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Don't worry, I love fat birds....why are you crying?

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Dating tips 101: First you find a girl that likes you. Then you realize no girl likes you. Moral: Lesson done.

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- Hey, what do you do for a living? - Female impersonator

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You're so beautiful you could be a tree... Or a high class prostitute

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Real life number XX: Girl: I will only sleep with you if you bring along your hot friend over there. Me: Uh, like a threesome with a guy? Uh... Maybe let me think about it... At nighttime: Me: Hey Tobias, she said yes about screwing with me if you join in, but I swear I will kick your ass if you touch me! Tobias: Like if I touch you sexually? Me: Yeah! duh! Tobias: WHY?! Not even like a little? Moral: Not as much a anti-joke as the weirdest thing I ever experienced...

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You look like one that does not charge for sex ;)

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i am with stupid l l l \/

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"Hmm...you'll do."

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"Hi. You're looking mightily mediocre and I would like to buy you a medium priced drink."

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showing people this http://hahgay.com/ p.s after seeng any girls want to come back to my place

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As long as I have a face, you will always have a place to sit.

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Okay, I lied, the one below actually kinda works, people get impressed, it is quite the accomplishment you know... But since I am gonna get married soon I don't pick up as much as I should anyways. Moral: Man

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Nero: My name is Nero... Woman: Why I mean you aint black? Nero: Sure about that? Moral: In the Darkness... We are all the same...

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-Your eyes are as blue as toilet water

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If your right leg was Thanksgiving and your left leg was Christmas, could i come between the holidays?

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I have a knife and a penis. Choose which one goes in you.

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Did you just fart? 'cos you blew me away

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-Are you a dementor? Cuz you just took my breath away... -Expecto Patronum!!!

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How do you know where gonna have sex tonight.Im stronger than you.

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- I think i lost my number, can i have yours? - I think i lost my number too.

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Pick up lines from the stone age: Fail. Man: Hello, you look beautiful, I speak very well, and if you allow me to make love with you, I promise I will protect you and raise the child with you :)! Woman: WHAT? A guy without wild chesthair that speaks instead of grunting and yelling? You to sex me and you do not even got a club? I am SOOO gonna go to Grogg instead! He has like the biggest club and knows how to really HIT a woman! Moral: I would say somethings do change, but Id rather be Grogg than the loser above, of course I prefer hitting ON women first, if that does not work I... Oh right, I am married :P

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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