If I asked you out on a date, would your answer to that question be the same as your answer to this question?

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- Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven? - Nah, angels like me, have wings.

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In a loud bar: Man: Do you enjoy gRape? Woman: HOW DARE YOU YOU PERVERT! Man: Uh... how about raisins then... Woman: Err... can you repeat that first question again... Moral: I would but I would have to bypass the censorship somehow...

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Black dude at bar: HERE COMES THE COLE-TRAIN BABY! WANNA RIDE! Girl: So I assume your name is Cole right? Dude: Uh... actually no but... WAIT! where are you going!

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- Does this napkin smell like chloroform to you? There is no response because she passed out from it and he leaves in order to void suspicion.

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I heard you were looking for a STUD, well I have an STD all I need is U

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Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn.

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Female: Hey do you wann- Male: You got a purty mouth

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Order Online Nightwear and short shop online in India

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I lost my Nobel prize, can you help me find it?

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here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

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Wanna come home to my star destroyer and play with my lightsaber? No? How about just a trip down the Enterprise bridge to have fun with my romulans?... if you know what I mean? ;) ;)

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Man: hey... you seem pretty paralytic and unable to move in that wheelchair ;) Woman: uh oh...well actually I can move a bit... Man: Good because I do not wanna do ALL the thrusting back and forth... Woman: Bu.. but... I... I do not want to... Man: Well if you do not want sex, then just run away... ;) FATALITY... FLAWLESS VICTORY... RAPEALITY!

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-You smell nice Thanks....... -Have you ever thought of turning your sweat into perfume?

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It's not Rapee If you yell surprise!

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play R-a-p-e? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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Are you from Austrailia? Because I'd like to put my tongue in your butthole

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Man: Oh crap I don't have a condom Woman: Don't worry I have one

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-There's a 'U' in beautiful. -Yeah, and there's a 'U' in ugly.

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(in a loud club) -Do you wanna dance?! -Umm, with YOU? NO! -What?! oh no, i said, "you look FAT in those PANTS!"

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hi how u doin fine and u well bii have a nice day DONT TELL ME WHAT TO DO

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Girl are your parents Mexican, cuz you look Mexican.

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guy: hey baby come join the PEN15 club with mee ;) girl: whats that?? guy: come and i will show you...*goes into the guys restroom with her*....lets go to the restroom and never rest...except you can rest on my PEN15

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-Can I have your name? -Why? Don’t you already have one?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!