- I may not be a genie, but I can make your dreams come true. - First wish: don't speak ever again.

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Your body would look good in my trunk.

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-Are you an angel? -Yeah...actually I am. I remember you-aren't you the guy that fell out of heaven? So THAT'S why your face is so screwed up.

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I'll never forget the day I swept you off of my feet.

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you actually look alright with the lights on.

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- Is it hot in here, or is it just the broken A/C unit?

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-Hey baby wanna paint the whole town red? -Yeah, with your blood

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- Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? - No but I scraped my knees when I climbed up from hell

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Me: Honestly, I just want to RAPING you. Woman: YES PLEASE! Me: Fuck off its not RAPING it its consensual... Moral: Yeah sometimes they say yes, its when they say no I become shadow made flesh... ...And wait for you... Am I here?... NOPE Ill get you rawr I will now stalk you silently for hours... days... Anyway im bored your nothing ... Moral: SAY YES YOU MUCKING MIDIOT!

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Guy:I invented troll face oh yea! Girl:you gave my daughter nightmares for weeks you b****!(throws drink in face)

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The word of the day is 'legs'. Wanna come to my place and spread the word?

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-What's your name sexy? -Taken!

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I DROPPED MY LAPTOP IN THE RIVER IT WAS ADELE ROLLING IN THE DEEP ( A DELL ROLLING IN THE DEEP)

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Yeah! Keep drinking girl! Ill just lube your backdoor, what? Dont ask, just drink! Moral: I love it when women call me a pig, all men are pigs, and real women dont want some boy...

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One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door. Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The cop was happy and left the shop. The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen doughnuts waiting for him at his door. Then a Member of Parliament came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.' The Member of Parliament was very happy and left the shop. The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen Members of Parliament lined up waiting for a free haircut. And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it.

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Do you believe in rape by first sight? Moral: I think its immoral enough as it is already.

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- I'd go to the end of the world for you - Good,Stay There

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- Haven't I seen you someplace before? - Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.

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Guy: Hey, cutie! What's your name? Girl: JOHN CENA.

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Do you have sunburn, or are you always this hot? It's sunburn.

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- Do you wanna play the rape game? - NO! - That's the spirit!

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Man: Hey, I'm Red. You like to walk? Woman: No. I prefer to run. Away from you

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ur so hot, i'd let u put ur vagina inside of me

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On a scale from one to ten, you're about a two.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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