- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Man: Pokes Woman Ouch! You burned me! Woman: How did I burn you? Man: Because you're just THAT hot. ;) Woman: Pokes Man Well it's too bad you're not.

Guy: Thanks Girl: Why? Guy: Cuz you made me get rid of that boner

- Haven't we met before? - Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic.

You're one-in-a-million. That means there is roughly 7,000 people exactly like you in the world.

Boy: You know the keyboard says that U and I are together. Girl: It also says JK

why did the boy laugh? A:he saw another boy get raped by a giant scorpian

when ilfe gives you lemons i squirt the jiuce in my eyes so i dont have to stare at you anymore :)

You know, you can't spell "stud" without STD and U

wanna go halves on a b*stard?

-If I could arrange the alphabet, that would be cool.

He: You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She: You are so handsome when you keep your mouth shut.

I might not be the best looking guy here but im the only one talking to you

Do you want to dance No I suppose a blow job is out of the question then

Did anyone ever tell you you smell like Catalina? Did anyone ever tell you you smell like a cat?

Him: Has anyone ever told you that you are absolutely beautifull...?? Her: (smiles) and says no.. Him: there is a good reaseon for that..

That outfit looks great on you.. .. It would look even better crumpled up in a pile in an evidence bag

Are you a parking ticket? Cause you got fine written all over you.

"Is it true you're a lesbian?"

Eat me, I'm organic!

That outfit looks fantastic on you... ..it would look even better in an evidence bag

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

Man: *Pokes Woman* Ouch! You burned me! Woman: How did I burn you? Man: Because you're just THAT hot. ;) Woman: *Pokes Man* Well it's too bad you're not.