- Anti-Pickup Line

Are u in the army cause u make my private stand at attention.

I love Mark Wahlberg!

You're like chocolate pudding. You look like crap.

i want a blowjob bitch lifts her hijab

How do you know where gonna have sex tonight.Im stronger than you.

if i was a fly, i'd be all over you, because you are the SHIT.

Male: hey sexy whats your sign? Female: dead end!

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

You smell just like my mom...

Woman and man on picnicking date at the forest: (Man gets bit in his pingas by a snake..) Man: ARGH! HEALP HEALP! Woman: OMG! I have to call the doctor! RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING Doctor! My date was bitten by a poisonous snake! What can we do! Doctor: The only option would be to suck the poison out of the bitten area or else he will probably die... "Click" Man: ARGH! WHAT DID THE DOCTOR SAY! PLEASE ITS GETTING NUMB! WHAT DID HE SAY! Woman: He said you are gonna die... :( Moral: She may not have sucked, but this sure did :P

Man: Lady... Seriously, I got a PhD! Woman: Seriously, you look more like an athlete, in what? Man: Lady... I got a pretty huge Richard. Moral: RICHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDS!

I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

For the males that do not know what I mean with "woman screams" comment below... well HAHAHAHAHAH LOSERS LOOOOOOOOOOOSEEEEEEEEERS! Moral: Read a book about females more interesting parts one day you lazy bastard... as for the girls... I am not talking about anything bad nor dirty... just 12 hour orgasms and such nice things... WHAT? YOU GONNA TELL ME THAT IS HORRIBLE? Well in that case you dont know what you are missing... and you wont ever know.... Ps: Can you believe I am actually trying to get thumbs downs but keep getting upped? Thanks for accepting my ever growing controversial nature, lets keep it that way and soon moral man will uh... receive a medal for uh... well a small keychain for... uh... you know what? Never mind.

guy: do you like sea food? girl: hell yes, I got crabs, would you like some

a guy and a girl meet at a bar and has a great conversation girl - can I borrow your phone? I told my ex I'd call him when I found someone better. boy - sure, here you go gives phone girl - silence after awkward phone call boy - give me my phone back girl - you dont seem to get it do you... boy - give me my phone back girl - silence boy - GIVE ME MY PHONE BACK YOU BITCH boy takes out a shotgun with him and repeatedly shoots girl girl dodges and takes a bazooka and aims for boy boy manages to get out of the bar boy installs bomb in center of bar boy leaves bar everyone attempts to get out of bar boy locks the door boy - Yippie kai yay, moth- explosion everyone dies MORAL OF THE STORY - DO NOT GO INTO A BAR

man: may I impale you on my stake? woman: O.o (for goth girls)

That outfit looks great on you.. .. It would look even better crumpled up in a pile in an evidence bag

NO WAIT SON ITS 999 FUCK COME ON! DONT GO "NERO SAYS WITH ME SON!" I mean that shit you pull on everyone, come on man, I posted wrong... Yeah your word is law and all that So can we like make a deal? You pay my repair wreck of a car and you can slash the damn tires yourself if you wanna later?

You allergic to semen?

-Hey babe, if you were homework, I'd do you on my couch, my table, and my bed. -Yeah? You just failed.

The word of the day is legs. Lets go to your place and spread the word

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put "your sister" and "I" together.

-Did you just fart? Cause you blew me away.

Him: I'd go through anything for you. Her: The exit's over there.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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