Do you work at subway? Because i often enjoy eating there and i think the food is good. I do not eat there every day because i do not want to get over weight.

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A: Did I see you walking out of that bar or was it an angel? :D B: I'm your mom you pervert.

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did it hurt ? did what hurt? when your fell from heaven? because it looks like you landed on your face :O

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Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Yeah sure, ill just go grab my gag and handcuffs. Male: ...

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One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door. Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The cop was happy and left the shop. The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen doughnuts waiting for him at his door. Then a Member of Parliament came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.' The Member of Parliament was very happy and left the shop. The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen Members of Parliament lined up waiting for a free haircut. And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it.

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Ugly begins with U. But awesome ends with ME.

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-Hey sit on my face and I will guess your weight

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Walking to your car alone later?

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Girls hate me, they always discuss about how they regret fucking with me over and over again. Moral: Thumb me down, I know ya love me.

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you know what rhymes with hug me LET'S HAVE SEX

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I heard this one in real life in Spain, pretty good one: Man: Please marry me! I am nothing without you! Woman: If you are worth nothing then why should I want you? Man: Uh... Moral: Its a great honor having a dedicated group of followers making sure my comments always have red thumbs, thanks to this my sociology studies are complete. My thanks to every azzhole out there.

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GEDDINTHEFRIGGENCAR

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Are your legs tired? cuz ive got a raging boner and need to get rid of it

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Pick up lines from the stoneage: Man: RARGH GROG BEAT YOU WITH CLUB! AND MAKE THE LITTLE GROGS WITH YOU! Woman: But I just had one! Aww not this again whatever... Moral: And over time women adjusted to clubs and often end up knocked up when passing out in them, While men that own their own clubs usually end up knocking up a lot more of them... Some things never change...

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Boy- Did it hurt when you fell- Girl- From heaven?!? AWWW <3 Boy- No the whore tree when you banged every guy on the way down.

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Hey big girl ;), why you alone? You ate all of your friends?

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guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together Girl: Its a good thing N and O are already together

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Male: Get in the van.

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Man: May I have this dance? Woman: Take it, it's all yours [goes away]

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Man - Hey hun.. .Can I kiss the most beautiful girl on the whole party? ;) Wowan - Hell no. Man - Ah, I see... And what about you? Can I?

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"Are you a parking ticket?" "What?" "You’ve got fine written all over you"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -To get to the other side.

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Do you wanna go halves in a bastard?

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Roses are red Violets are fine You be the 6 And I'll be the 9

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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