- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Guy for a girl with a dog: -Does the dog have a cell phone? -Why? is your mom in heat?

- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together - U and me - Grammer freak

Do you work for UPS? 'Cause i could swear that you were checking out my package.

Dont let this rape turn into a murder

man: may I impale you on my stake? woman: O.o (for goth girls)

Boy- I'm heading back to my place. Want to come? Girl-Sorry you strike me as a person who cums all by himself.

Hey girl, I May not be Fred Flinstone but I can make your bed rock! ;)

wanna go halves on a b*stard?

The word of today is "leg's",no whom are i kidding, bird is the word!

- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

Him: Did it hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Him: When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down

Male: You're so beautiful. Female: Well thank you. Male: Yeah, you look just like my Mom.

Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car I want to rape you

guy:did you fall from heaven? girl:no? guy:sorry, it just looks like you landed on your face

I was a little bit nervous to talk to you at first, but thankfully my Aides encouraged me to do it.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Ask him nicely to come down, and if that doesn't work, he will most likely stay up there.

Man: Hello there! I am a gynecologist, may I study your vagina? Woman: NO! Man: DAMN THIS ONE NEVER WORKS! DAMMIT! Moral: Duh...

Haven't we met somewheer before? Yes, son.

Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Sorry i only sleep with dead bodies.

Boy- Didi it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until i saw you.

Boy: You remind me of the ocean Girl: Because I'm mysterious, adventurous, and romantic? Boy: No, because you make me sick

Man: HELP! HELP! MY PENIS IS GONE! SOMEONE HELP ME FIND IT! Woman: OMG I am a nurse, we must find it before its too late! Where did you last see it? Man: It... it was around inside my pants somewhere... It should not be too hard to find it... cuz its pretty big...

BOY-i love you GIRL-(sneezes) sorry im allergic to bullshit

Dont blame me for using moral all the time its just part of my sig...nature XD Moral: Not a pick up line, so its pretty anti.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book