Mmm baby....I want you to stick your Gaberwalkie in my bandersnatch.. ;)

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NO WAIT SON ITS 999 FUCK COME ON! DONT GO "NERO SAYS WITH ME SON!" I mean that shit you pull on everyone, come on man, I posted wrong... Yeah your word is law and all that So can we like make a deal? You pay my repair wreck of a car and you can slash the damn tires yourself if you wanna later?

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Lol, lucky you that this piece of shit site worked so fast for you huh DAD? Fine, I need no essay on her ass, my firm (well where I work at the top of the foodchain lets be modest here) sponsors all Samsung phones, so seriously ill get you the most expensive one I can find (its free, ill just tell them I need an extra one for, calling, but just for you, if you tell anybody else, ill just slash your tires. Man, I hate HATE sounding nice because I am not, but you can have that damn Fiat something (black car) that I bought from my ex, you take that instead? You still owe me the cash, but the car is yours (I never use it, and its you know... Bad, but still ten thousand times better than your car. Moral: Me? I just cant bother using my wives phone in order to call myself and find my own damn phone, so if you read this, you are golden. Oh, and if you want that piece of shit car of yours (cant even tell the brand can you? Seriously tell me) then you can have the damn money, but no paintjob, that car is, and must look like the trash it is. AMEN? Jk, Fuck Amen. Finally, so you want one with Keyboard attachment or one with keyboard embedded into the screen? The ones with the keyboards are usually a bit more pricey, but man, some of them suck ass, still I can get you like the one I got for business (yeah we gotta use fucking Samsung phones it pays well though) And forget your damn car tires, XD Im laughing here, some could steal those dirty flat pieces of shit, and you would be driving without noticing shit my whigga XD.

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Five dollar women... WOO!

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- You're a bombshell! - Too bad it ain't gonna BANG!

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Hello my name is Pogo. Would you like to jump on my stick?

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Female: Hey can i buy you a drink? Male: I have AIDS.

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Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa what I don't want for Christmas?

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This one is for the ladies: Man: If I could put 6 and 9 on my calculator we would have the greatest time ever ;) Woman: If you did that id just put 911 on my cellphone.

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Are you from tennessee? Because your inbred and retarted.

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Guy: I got you a gift! Girl: Thanks.. make sure it's not you....

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roses are red, violets are blue, my toe hurts.

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I am terribly sorry for talking to you, but I was wondering if...

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My wife does not know it but every time we have sex I put a dollar aside to go toward her Christmas present. So far she is getting a cup of coffee.

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So, I hear you want to rape Nathan Skye's body.

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Mirrors can't talk, luckily for you they can't laugh either

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He: If i were a carpenter i would nail you She: If i were a hammer i would hit you

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Man: Your tag's showing. It says "Made in Heaven". Woman: *Proceeds to leak period blood into a puddle at the man's feet and walks away in silence*

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Male: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put I and U together Female: You don't have to do anything because N and O are already together

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roses are red violets are blue i have a knife get in the van

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I have a .357 magnum pointed at your kidney. Wanna go get some coffee?

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I have a gun.

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It's not rape if you say "Surprise!"

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The word of the day is legs, Lets go upstairs and spread the word.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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