Dating tips 101: First you find a girl that likes you. Then you realize no girl likes you. Moral: Lesson done.

My penis just died. Can I bury it in your ass?

A: Did I see you walking out of that bar or was it an angel? :D B: I'm your mom you pervert.

Wow...you don't sweat much for a fat girl.

Guy:Are you wearing space pants, cause that ass is out of this world! Girl:No, they're baseball pants, cuz this ass is out of your league.

Boy: Do you have a boyfriend? Girl: I don't have a boyfriend but I have a Girlfriend !

guy: hey do you know how to sly a dragon? girl:No. guy: well your no help.

Charmeleon is Red, Squirtle is Blue, If you were a Pokemon, I'd choose you.

The below is no anti-pickupline unless you are a Jehova`s witness and want to uh... save my sole or something? Or just read a fun story... Moral: Like pick up lines is something one of them would use... actually they do after I reject their many offers... how? Keep on reading below to find out... its fun, promise. (unless you are a Jehova`s witness...)

*At a concert* guy- hey if you were that drum set, i'd bang you on that stage all night

At a bar. M: I so wanna sex you! W: What? :) M: What part of sex did you not get? VAGINA! W: You have problems with your heart? (angina) :( M: Stop screwing with me bitch! W: I dont have no itch... :/ *The man gets insulted and leaves* Woman: Cute guy, I wish I wasn't nearly deaf though... Moral "patience is a virtue?" Hell no! The guy got laid with 6 women that day so the moral is "The more people listen to what you have to say, the more you will get laid this day, and a deaf woman is a challenge if she aint your way"

Hey baby, if I could rearrange the alphabet U and I would have sex.

If i could rearrange the alphabet, id violate your ass hole.

yo im will smith yo, thats my name and I was juzz wonderin if you ever you know like the beach or bbq because stuff happen yanno and while I do some rap id just belieeve that things are a bit crazy these times so I was thinking maybe ill ask you out right? But then I was like WHAAAAAAZAAAAAAAAA and... Hey gurl where you goin im just getting warmed up. Moral: I met the guy, day one I had a great day, day two I didnt get any sleep and now I hate him, the end.

Why don't you slip into something more comfortable? Like a coma?

roses are red violets are blue My dog gives me a bigger orgasm then you

One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door. Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The cop was happy and left the shop. The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen doughnuts waiting for him at his door. Then a Member of Parliament came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.' The Member of Parliament was very happy and left the shop. The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen Members of Parliament lined up waiting for a free haircut. And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it.

- How 'bout we go to your place and take a shower together? - I think my husband and little baby would get a kick out of that!

Man: Hey is your name Zelda? Woman: Huh? What kind of stupid name is THAT! Man: EXCUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSE ME PRINCESS! Woman: What a dork... Moral: The man did not link with the woman that night... nor ever it seems...

How much does a polar bear weigh? What you don't know? In this day and age? Don't you have like google or something on your smart phone. geeeesh!

Hey gorgeous what are you drinking? Cyanide.

hey Herpes Go Away!

Boy:do you know to spell "Idiot" with just one word? Girl:how? Boy:U

your almost as hot as my wife

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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