- Anti-Pickup Line

Ryu at a Bar: Hey lady, you seem to be battle ready ;) wanna come home and get to know each other? I know some very "special moves" ;) Girl: Battle ready? Uh... "special moves eh?" OKAY! 2 weeks later: Girlfriend: Puff... puff... when you spoke about how you truly love me with all your heart... I expected more than... this fighting all the time... I wanna see these "special moves" you talk about ;) ;) ;) Ryu: The truth lies in the heart of battle! Girlfriend: Uh sure dear, but can I please go talk with my friends? I feel kind of beaten from uh... all the beatings... and lack of poundings... Ryu: Well... we have been fighting for hours so... SUREYOUCAN!!!! SMACK!!!!! Girlfriend: EEEEEEEEK! EEEEEEEEEK! EEEEEEEEEK! Announcer: KO! YOU WIN! DEFECT! Skill 00000000 Level of Moron 9001 Bonus 98493849384394839483. Ryu: You have to beat Shen Long to stand a chan... I mean I am so sorry dear! I must have walked a bit forward then accidentally ducked and jumped slightly upwards while using my strong punch button!... I am so sorry... its basically all I know to do! Girlfriend: I am sick of this! I am leaving you! Ryu: Argh... I AM BEING LEFT AGAIN? NOOH! Its the Dark... Hadou... I...WILL NOT LET YOU ESCAPE MY EVIL! HADOUUUUUUUKEN! Girlfriend: (dodges) HELP! SOMEONE FIND A DOCTOR! 2 Weeks later: Ryu: yes this... dark side takes me over and... its because all I know is Street Fighting and... uh some Street Fisting but I am new to that an.. Dr. Bob Sagat: Uh yes... well I am afraid you suffer from Schizophrenia Mr... uh...Hoshi? Ryu: Just Ryu...That Hoshi crap is just from the hilariously bad mov... Dr. Bob Sagat: Ok, so just take these medications and this "evil" "side" of you will not bother anyone anymore... now excuse me, I must leave, I have to feed my TIGER! TIGER! TIGER! TIGER! Ryu: huh? Dr.Bob Sagat I have four Tigers you see, and I am training them to do a TIGER UPPERCUT! Ryu: Ok... Ex-Girlfriend: What the hell did this have to do with pick-up? Ryu: Well Uh... do not leave me, I suck at it and I... dont leave! NOOOOOOOOOOO! My... medication... Later Akuma: Hey girl... heard you want something better than your weakling ex Ryu. Girl: Sniff... yeah he is all crazy and stuff... Akuma: Well... I can replace him, I look almost the same without this stupid wig and fake red lenses... besides they do not call me the master of fisting for nothing ;) Girl: SUREYOUCAN! Bonus scenes: Dr.Bob Sagat: You stupid TIGER! Will never learn to do a TIGER UPPERCUT! I am tired of all of you! TIGER GENOCIDE! Special message from WWE (the animal protectors not Wrestling Entertainment you moron): please save the last remaining TIGER! From Dr.Bob Sagats UPPERCUT!

Man: What did you say this horrible machine did look like? Woman: It was terrible it was like a man sized yellow and red robot that shoot lasers! After I refused its offer to come home with him he shoot lasers and destroyed my house... buah ;( ;( Man: That is terrible! Despicable! We have to do something about this! Such a beautiful supermodel should never go trough such a terrible atrocity! Woman: Buah... sigh... sniff... I know... but it was terrible! Man: so so my lady... you can come live with me in my giant mansion and we can have a couple of drinks to calm your nerves and relax... ;) Woman: Thank you Mr.Stark... Man: Oh Just call me Iron Ma... I mean Tony!

-I love you.

Hey good looking, what some mayonnaise?

Shaved your beard, so I can see you're a woman.

I've got candy.

-- Hey, can I have your number? -- 12

This tux is rented by the hour, are you?

That outfit looks fantastic on you... ..it would look even better in an evidence bag

Did anyone ever tell you you smell like Catalina? Did anyone ever tell you you smell like a cat?

What do u get when u mix a black a guy and an octopus The best dam cotton pickin machine you'll ever see!

You dont need makeup, plastic surgery is really cheap nowadays!

Every kiss begins with K ;) Yeah to bad ugly begins with U

- I know how to please a woman. - Then please leave me alone.

- Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason - Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!

- How do you like your eggs in the morning? - Unfertilized !

- Hey, baby, what's your sign? - Do not Enter

- So what do you do for a living? - I'm a female impersonator.

- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

- Your place or mine? - Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.

- Is this seat empty? - Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.

- You're a bombshell! - Too bad it ain't gonna BANG!

Q: Why are Italian girls so hairy? A: Because it turns out its a genetic predisposition in which almost all males and females have when of the Italian ethnicity, these genetics are also parts of other race types.

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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