Do you wanna be a pirate ship? Because there can be tons of seamen inside of you.

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Woman enters a...uh Cafe that only sells alcohol and stuff... now that is variation from the usual bar eh? Woman: Yo bitchy hot stuff, you look cheap get over here! lets bang! Man: How dare you! Woman: Why? You dont wanna try my wiener? Man: "throws drink at woman", Im gonna tell my girlfriend! Woman: I start getting the feeling something is very wrong here man... Man: Humpf! Just wait to my girlfriend gets here and beats you u... wait I to think there is something very very wrong here. Moral: The world may never know...

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In regard to the post below. I'm not even joking, one of my mates actually said that to a girl.

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Man: Yeah I have done it with thousands of women all around the world... THOUSANDS! Woman: Okay... then ill come home with you, I want an experienced man to be my first... At his house: Woman: I AM SCARED! Will it hurt? Its my first time and... Man: I dunno! I am scared as Its my first time too! :( Moral: A man whose is scared of sex... pfffffff!

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knock knock. whos there. interupting cow. inter... mooo!

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He: If i were a carpenter i would nail you She: If i were a hammer i would hit you

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roses are red violets are twisted bend over b**** your about to get fisted

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hey baby i just came in my pants

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He says "Where have you been all my life" She says "Hiding from you....how the hell did you find me?"

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Man seriously? Free Samsung? And that Fiat, I been wondering how much you want for it, not that i got it but I was considering buying it sometime. Son, I got no idea what brand this piece of shit car is, but the wheels are cool. No really, if you mean it, ill take that Fiat man, man, ill kiss your feet, ill do it, no really I mean Really? I mean really really? Man If you mean it, ill get over there right away, and man, you can have dunno, bad times, hell ANYTHING Okay? But if you are just messing with me, you can go fuck yourself and your phone man!

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You're like a star in the sky. Nothing but gas.

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Girl, wanna fuck rite now? Sure! Man! You are such a hoe! *walks away disgusted* Moral: Be careful for what you ask for.

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Male: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put I and U togather Female: Oh really, because if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put F and U together.

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Is there someone behind you? cause im seeing people behind your back

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Male - Your a sight for sore eyes Female - And your a sight that causes sore eyes

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Haven't we met somewheer before? Yes, son.

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- If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. - Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

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- I want to give myself to you. - Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.

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Man: Hey you look good enough to do Woman: Oh really because so does my 8 foot boyfriend. Man: ... Woman: Do you want me to pick him up from the gym?

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- I know how to please a woman. - Then please leave me alone.

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Guy: I think I got lost in your eyes. Girl: Here's a GPS. Go find yourself.

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- Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason - Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!

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Hey gurl, you smell like tape!

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- How do you like your eggs in the morning? - Unfertilized !

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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