Your father must be a thief, because I saw him stealing at Target earlier.

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-You smell nice Thanks....... -Have you ever thought of turning your sweat into perfume?

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hey wanna come back to my house, and help me kill my dog?

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You look like one that does not charge for sex ;)

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Me: it smells in here Her: its maybe my perfume! Me: no i let a glorious fart fallowed my an ass crapping on my foot

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As a man I am afforded greater opportunity then my equally qualified female counterparts. I have made it a life goal use this opportunities for greater good.

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B: Hey C do you wanna go out with me? C: Sorry B I only go out with guy's who come after me

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Whats best about having sex with twenty six year olds?..... Theres twenty of them!

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Are you from Tennessee? Because your accent sounds stupid.

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Hey baby that dress is amazing! It would look even better as a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor!

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Male: You are a Drugs? Female: Why? because your so addicted to me? Male: Nope, You ruined my life!

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your almost as hot as my wife

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Are you a broom? Cause you look like a rather dull, inanimate object that collects dust.

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Hey chicks! I am a very experienced suicide bomber, I was even in the plane that blew up the world trade center A ;) ¨ Moral: This must be the worst pickupline ever for oh so many reasons on so many levels...

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Hi! Do you like fat guys with no money?

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girl:go away! boy:okay girl:i need space boy:okay just one meter girl: no i"m not kidding boy:i know girl:my mother hate's you boy:i hate her too.! girl:we are now break boy:okay i"m hungry lets eat! girl:you don't understand me boy:no i"m understand you girl:you are philosopher i hate you boy:what? girl:nothing at the end of the story they loved each other

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your beauty surpasses that of the greek goddess aphrodite.

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Him: Has anyone ever told you that you are absolutely beautifull...?? Her: (smiles) and says no.. Him: there is a good reaseon for that..

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did you fall from heaven, cause i forgot my library card.

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Hi, I've taken like 8 dumps today... Wanna dance?

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I wish my sister was as hot as you.

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My greatest strength is my self-deprecating sense of humor, but its probably not worth getting to know me.

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Guy: So do you wanna come over to my place? Girl: Not really but thanks for the offer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car I want to rape you

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!