Boy:do you know to spell "Idiot" with just one word? Girl:how? Boy:U

thumb_up thumb_down

- hey baby i wanna show you something - wait i wanna show you something too -what is it? -my fists

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Man: So you will come home with me later? Girl: Sure! Man: Great then ill just go find more women I can bang later in the meantime... Moral: Depending of the kind of woman, this is of no consequence...

thumb_up thumb_down -100

"Hey did I not meet you at the singles and desperates club?"

thumb_up thumb_down +106

http://scriptsbay.com http://scriptsbay.net

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Hey, Are You From Tennessee, Because Your License Plate Says Tennessee.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Put the lotion on the skin!

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Is there someone behind you? cause im seeing people behind your back

thumb_up thumb_down -63

If you were attacked by a bear with chainsaw arms i hope it stays away from your face, because I think you're cute.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Boy: Do you have a boyfriend? Girl: I don't have a boyfriend but I have a Girlfriend !

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Boy: If i can rearrange the keyboard, i'll put U and I next to each other Girl: It's already together dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +75

So when' the baby due?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

girl - holy sausage! boy - what happen! girl - i broke my foot! boy - oh!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Guy: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl: No, but it will hurt when I pepper spray you.

thumb_up thumb_down -126

-Darling, I will never stop pursuing you. Even from the ends of the earth, I will follow you wherever you go. Really, I love you that much. -"Honey", I will call the police and have you thrown in jail for stalking me. Really, I hate you that much.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Guy: Da da da da da! I'm loving it. (looks at girl's crotch)

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Guy enters a bar: Guy: I have some really bad self-esteem and would really apreciate if someone would give me a chance and... Gorgeous woman: Hey, I would love to get to know you, and maybe take you home and... Guy: WHAT? THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN TO ME! I CANT HANDLE IT! HEEEEEEEEEEELP! (Runs out of bar screaming)

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Female: Hey do you wanna buy me a drink? Male: I really don't like your face.

thumb_up thumb_down -116

Why do cops eat donuts so much? Because they are delish

thumb_up thumb_down +22

-hey girl, you must be a pirate cause you got a lot of booty

thumb_up thumb_down +125

rohypnol. rape drug

thumb_up thumb_down -10

"You look like Carmen Electra's deformed, burned, dismembered sister..."

thumb_up thumb_down +56

You know, I had a great pickup line, but I just forgot it.

thumb_up thumb_down -90

Hey, I may not be too smart, I may not have a big dick, I may not be strong nor cool, but at least I uh...

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!