- Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason - Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!

-Can I have your name? -Why? Don’t you already have one?

- I want to give myself to you. - Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.

He says "Where have you been all my life" She says "Hiding from you....how the hell did you find me?"

-What would you say if I asked you to marry me? -Nothing. I can’t talk and laugh at the same time.

- I know how to please a woman. - Then please leave me alone.

-There's a 'U' in beautiful. -Yeah, and there's a 'U' in ugly.

Lol, again I am on a adrenaline... well let me be subtle... GANGBANGING WITH ANAL, PUSSY, TWO GIRLS FIGHTING OVER ONE COCK (Ladies there is enough down there to share)... ...Anyway, it reminds me of when I was 21, and I was like "You know what? Threesomes and that kinda stuff is nice and all, but I am a grown up now and... ...TSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSs Today I am 32, Married, (Hey my wife is into stuff, so its not cheating if she is the one enjoying while I videotape sometimes okay? (Never on cam, you crazy? You cant sell that shit! Okay I am kidding, the collection is personal) Ps: Seriously girls, one thing is that you smear yourself with my cumshots okay? But Hugging me afterwards? DATS SICK! (Name is Nero, I am not black, I am Hispanic, Latino Sexy... Well, actually when I take a look in the mirror I go, "meh well some guys got the looks"... ...I wont lie though, either my looks dont matter shite, or girls really like it...

-How did you get to be so beautiful? -I must’ve been given your share.

- You look really nice - I know

Her: Are you from China? Because I’m China get your number Him: Tibet you are. But I'm not Russian into anything, sorry.

Let's not turn this rape... into a murder

-Wanna have sex? -No -Damn

Ugly begins with U. But awesome ends with ME.

Van what van? GET TO THE CHOPPAH!

Pick up lines from the stoneage: Man: RARGH GROG BEAT YOU WITH CLUB! AND MAKE THE LITTLE GROGS WITH YOU! Woman: But I just had one! Aww not this again whatever... Moral: And over time women adjusted to clubs and often end up knocked up when passing out in them, While men that own their own clubs usually end up knocking up a lot more of them... Some things never change...

girl:go away! boy:okay girl:i need space boy:okay just one meter girl: no i"m not kidding boy:i know girl:my mother hate's you boy:i hate her too.! girl:we are now break boy:okay i"m hungry lets eat! girl:you don't understand me boy:no i"m understand you girl:you are philosopher i hate you boy:what? girl:nothing at the end of the story they loved each other

Man: Are you a beach? Cause I'm sure there's a lot of crabs crawling around down there

Does anyone have a toothpick? I need to pick the crabs out of the cracks of my teeth.

Whenever I look at stars I think of you... Because your only beatiful from a distance.

Real life number XX: Girl: I will only sleep with you if you bring along your hot friend over there. Me: Uh, like a threesome with a guy? Uh... Maybe let me think about it... At nighttime: Me: Hey Tobias, she said yes about screwing with me if you join in, but I swear I will kick your ass if you touch me! Tobias: Like if I touch you sexually? Me: Yeah! duh! Tobias: WHY?! Not even like a little? Moral: Not as much a anti-joke as the weirdest thing I ever experienced...

- Hey do you wanna hang out? - I'm 17.

At a huge bar only known as Castlevania... Woman: Get lost loser! Why would I wont pay you "tribute" you pervert! Man: It was not by my hand that I am once again given flesh.... I was called here by humans who wish to pay me tribute! Woman: What do you mean? You are totally insane and make no sense at all! Man: Perhaps the same could be said of ALL religions.,, Woman: You are quite the nutjob man... Man: What is a man? A miserable little pile of secrets! But enough talk... Have at you! Woman: EEEK! Man: But what is this? Did I just attack a woman wearing a cross? Is your last name Belmont? Woman: Yeah So? Is there a problem with my HOLY CROSS! *Man on fire*: WHAT? THIS CANNOT BE! ARGH!!!!!!! Moral: Die monster! You don't belong in this world!

Hey, Are You From Tennessee, Because Your License Plate Says Tennessee.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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