Guy: You look two times as beautiful with makup on. Girl: Really? I think you would too.

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A long time ago I had a vision of someone like you. I was in a psych ward, wearing a straight jacket. Would you like some blended cheese?

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Guy:I invented troll face oh yea! Girl:you gave my daughter nightmares for weeks you b****!(throws drink in face)

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Ya know what would look good on you? ME!

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“I've been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you.” (Groucho Marx)

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-Do you mind if i smoke? -No. I dont even mind if you burn....

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Dating post: "Nice male looking for female company, I have a steady job and would prefer if you too had a job, you will be particularity happy if you have a small penis fetish. Signed BIGPENIS19INCHESJIMlight sleeper

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guy: do you like sea food? girl: hell yes, I got crabs, would you like some

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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"Hey did I not meet you at the singles and desperates club?"

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You like my boobies ;) Girl: I said no you disgusting fat bastard! Moral: What fucking kind of MOTHERFUCKING MORAL are you expecting to find here?!?

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Man: Lady... Seriously, I got a PhD! Woman: Seriously, you look more like an athlete, in what? Man: Lady... I got a pretty huge Richard. Moral: RICHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDS!

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Honestly bitch, I hate you, but my balls are bursting so its either you or the next disgusting ugly bitch in line, my mom!

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I have one thing to say to all the woman who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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Girl: You know I've never kissed a boy....... Boy: Me too

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sHe; Theirs a "L" in love. he; and theirs a L in Lick my penis.

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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Man: Do you work at Subway? Girl: Why? Did I just give u a 6 inch?

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Do you work at Subway, because you're giving me a footlong. No actually, I once had a job at a local Quizno's Sub Shop. However a tragic fire killed several employees and customers at this very location. I survived, but lost have permanent Third-Degree burns across my body. My life is ruined, prick.

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Well there's the exit, will you go out with me?

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-Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I'd be in prison.

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Are you jamacian? Cause your jamacian me crazy? no you're a fucking whore

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From 1 to America how free are your tonight? North Korea

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Losers pick-up sex guide. 1. Create a beautiful environment at home, with candles, romantic music, etc. 2. Buy lube, some sexy female underwear, a couple of sex toys, some erotic magazines to excite you`re partner. 3. Pick-up you`re stuff and masturbate.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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