Lol man, you know this man would never sue your ass, but... Man it takes a message here to see that you are like a super whigger. Anyway DAD! Thanks for the kind words, and seriously, you dont kiss ass on regular basis just one thing, you can reply wherever, text is cool You got the hots for your sister dude? I mean the deal was 50 uh words? Letters? Anyway its good, but DAD!... You know I never asked you to write anything about your sisters ass, its kinda weird DAD! Anyway, what do I judge, I banged my 7 years old sister back at the days where I still called her mom... Well she trained me, then I returned with the force, and now her husband kinda knows my deal and... I STILL BANG HER! <<<<< Anyway, man, keep the cash, I just wanted to show the world... Moral: Ladies and gentlemen, and this is how you make someone and anyone your bitch! Nothing personal DAD! You know that as far as I care, all my friends kneel before while my enemies are crushed under my mighty heel. Charisma... Kiddo, I know you are struggling with cash and stuff, but seriously, just for that one online, (your sisters story which id never ask you to go for helps) BUT If you have read this far (BECAUSE THE WORDS OF YOUR DARK OVERLORD ARE LAW) Then just send me a reply saying 666 and I will pay to fix whatever the hell is wrong with your car man, I cant stand the sound, and I know you can pay up, its just that times are down... ...For you. Actual code 999 (not satanist here, I hate all religion) post 666 and ill get someone to slice your tires instead.

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If I had chloroform and a rag, you'd be waking up in a closet tomorrow.

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Do you work at Subway? Cuz you just gave me a footlong

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- I can make your bed rock. - Oh yeah? An earthquake can too..

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Man: Do you sleep on your stomach? Woman: No... Man: Can I?

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put I and U together. - Would you also change it so that I is an object, therefore making your previous sentence grammatically correct? And besides, I already organized the alphabet so that N and O are right next to each other.

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Are you being followed because i've been see someone behind your back!

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If we were confronted, by a vicious man-eating bear with chain-saws for hands and fangs, holding a hammer; than I would sincerley hope you wouldn't be harmed because you're pretty.

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-Why is one breast bigger than the other? -because I popped it and all the silicone leaked out

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Male: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Female: did it hurt when they kicked you out of hell?

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-Do you believe in love at first sight or do you want me to walk by again? -Yeah, but this time don't stop!

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Eat me, I'm organic!

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- So, wanna go back to my place? - Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?

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-If I saw you naked, I'd die happy. -If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

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Is Heaven missing an Angel? Because I have an erection.

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Your parents must be assholes...because you're the shit.

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(boy gives flowers to a girl) Girl: Are these for me? Boy: Nope, I just want you to hold them for me for a second..

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- How do you like your eggs in the morning? - Unfertilized !

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Hey big girl ;), why you alone? You ate all of your friends?

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-There's a 'U' in beautiful. -Yeah, and there's a 'U' in ugly.

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When you burst through the asphalt, emerging from the depths of hell.

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-What would you say if I asked you to marry me? -Nothing. I can’t talk and laugh at the same time.

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- I want to give myself to you. - Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.

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Hey girl, I just fixed your pipes, I got a pipe of my own that needs some fixing if you know what I mean ;) Moral: Pornography is a lie.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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