-Hey sit on my face and I will guess your weight

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Girl: I was just wondering... Boy: Smell my armpits on July 24th, 2016!

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(in a bar) Guy: Know how to play any instruments? Girl: No...but I wanna learn. Can you teach me? Guy:Sure..ever heard of the skin flute? Girl: (unaware) No. Can you teach me to play it? Guy: Sure, I can. :) (The girl leaves with the guy as he looks over his shoulder and winks with the thought of getting laid)

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Sickman Fraud: Hmm you look remotely alike my mother... Woman: Uh? Sickman Fraud: Yes fucking you should das probably give me some release, die reason to resist me is not necessary, you envy my pingas and I can assign it to you if you put on this ugly wig and yell "bad boy" whilzt I das fukte das rassenhol... Woman: OMG SICK! Moral: The father of modern psychology? Seriously?! I was going for a bachelor in psychology studies, but its just disgusting.

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He-Are you from Tennesse? Still He-Cu'z I wanna suck ur face off..

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Guy: Hey would you like to dance? Girl: No! Guy: Oh come on! Don't be picky. I wasn't!

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Hitler: Hey Mädchen, du bist Jude? Girl: What? Hitler: Ärmel hochkrempeln, ich brauche deine Nummer.

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Male: I'd give her one Female: I wouldn't have sex with you if you were the last person on earth Male: I was rating you out of 10 you ugly bitch

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- Have we met? - Honey, we're not meeting now.

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How much per quarter hour? Actually do you do 10 minute blocks?

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Man and girl talking: Girl: ARE YOU GETTING A HARDON? Man: You think I am a pervert or something? Of course not! Its just the hamster I keep between my ballsack!

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Girl, did it hurt when you got dragged up all the way from hell? Moral: The hell with morals!

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This doesn't have to be a rape.

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A: Wanna go get some pizza and then have sex at my place?? B: No.. B: U don't like pizza? Some chinees then?

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Batman enters a bar: Batman: Ladies... I am Batman... *everyone runs out screaming* Batman: *facepalm* Moral: Want to be feared? Well what did you expect? Who I am? Are you dense? Retarded or something? I am the goddamn Moral-Man!

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You're like a drug to me. why because I'm so addicting?:) No, because you ruined my life.

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fancy going halves on a bastard?

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I'm your Edward and your my Bella

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: What? Him: When you fell out of the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm using my hand but thinking of you ;)

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Your breast is like a beer holder, you would allow me to store beer in between your breasts, while I talk on the phone

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-Girl I'd go through anything for you. -Good than go through a blender!

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Do you know karate... 'Cause I wanna know if you can fight back!

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Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I would be in prison.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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