He - Nice shoes. She - Thanks. He - But i think they would look better in my pants.

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-Your eyes like diamonds, they give me hope. -Your eyes are like coal, they do nothing for me. Now please go away.

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Guy: (Walks up to girl) "I do not think it is a girls body that makes her special, it is her personality that really counts". Girl: "Well that's to bad because you can't have sex with my personality". (Then walks away)

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Girl: Go f**k yourself Guy: can you help me?

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Man, no im still waiting,need to get my kids, hope its fine son, okay punches, captain falcon, but you break my jaw, I wont even ask for you to pay the bill, ill expect it. Man, good times, honestly, i was not even drunk, I was high as shit, never again tho, they did not tell me it was "magic tobacco" until I started seeing numbers NUMBAS! Hey, mind if I come stay sometime? I mean we really miss you son, you always at the fuckhouse now. Just me and... Well the gang... Just like the twelve of us, tell me who you dont want to invite and ill bounce him out for you. Man dog, that chick I punched down was pretty as fuck, she would have been my wife... Anyway just fucking happy finally a real car dude! If she fucks you to death, you gonna go out young and a Legend among gods, let her keep on sucka! (just don forget bout my sis huh? She asks about you too fucking much already) Man, you got me typing almost as much as you dog, anyway is you know, in four hours allright? If not screw my kid, I need a car ill get him a cab.

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together - U and me - Grammer freak

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He: Did you fall from Heaven? She: Well... He: 'Cos I got an erection. She: -__-

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Happy BirthdaySean!

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I'd take you to the zoo but you might be mistaken for an elephant

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A guy asks a girl in the bar if he can buy her a drink she denies saying that alcohol is bad for her legs the guy asks why do they swell? No. they spread.

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men: Do you ride horses, because I'd let you ride me all night!

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I also got a phd. Awesome in what? Uh wait, is phd and std the same? Wait I mean... Moral: Just leave you dont want to find out the wrong way.

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Me: it smells in here Her: its maybe my perfume! Me: no i let a glorious fart fallowed my an ass crapping on my foot

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Female Police officer: Anything you say can and will be held against you. Me: Boobies.

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so... you're a girl,huh?

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When you burst through the asphalt, emerging from the depths of hell.

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When a tractor fell on your face?

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Gaywatch starts

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—do you believe in love at first sight or shall I come back again? —no, and I think you shall not come back ever.

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Her: Guess what? Him: What? Her Yo Mama! Him: Is she that slut i did last night?

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So I caught my sister masturbating the other day, it was like lol hahaha you filthy bitch! Then she was like DONT TELL ANYBODY PLEASE I WILL BUY YOU THOSE BOXING GLOVES YOU WANTED SO MUCH! PLEASE! And I was like, NUHUUUH! The bed is full of piss and I totally got this on my cellphone, so you gonna pull up your panti... Oh you still looking for them LOL! Yeah, that was the subject I brought up at a bar... Sober, unless Redbull counts as drunk... Anti Pickupline as FUCK! Players Dont Use RedBull -Richard Nixon or whatever.

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-Girl I'd go through anything for you. -Good than go through a blender!

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Your father must have been a theif, because you look like a pikiey

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- Grab your coat, you've pulled - Okay, Bye!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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