man: would u please me with a blowjob girl: cant u be romantic ? man: would please me with a blowjob at the sunset

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Sung to the melody of Ozzy`s: "Moral Man" HEES THE MORAL MAN, IIIS HEE MORAL OR IS HE DEAD? HEES THE MORAL MAN AAARE THERE MORALS INSIDE HIS HEEAD. Moral: NOOO THERE ISNT! ONLY IMMORAL INSIDE! AND ILL KEEP POSTING, ONLY TO CRUSH YOUR INSIDES! *guitar solo begins*

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Guy: what do this pickup line and your face have in common? Girl: what? Guy: they are both poorly constructed.

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hey angel you duh sexy , if you duh rice i eat you everyday-pha haha

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Him - Would you like to dance? Her - NO! Him - I'm sorry. I think you misunderstood me. I said, "You look fat in those pants."

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I don't have a library card but do you mind if I check you out?

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Q: What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? A: My zipper.

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Male: Did you get your tickes to the barbercue? Female: What barbercue? Male: The barbercue where i put my meat on your face.

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You know, I had a great pickup line, but I just forgot it.

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"Hey did I not meet you at the singles and desperates club?"

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Your father must have been a theif, because you look like a pikiey

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"Have you ever seen a 2-incher?"

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*Boy looks at cloth* -Does this smell like chlorophorm?

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That King that said: Kill all male babies... Lets say he was a teenager? Moral: Excellent job son, but you see, sharing is caring, have a victory drink!... Thing is... I don't care... rest well...For eternity... Hughman Heffer... The seed has been sown... you got nothing on me...

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Are you an ornithologist?... because my penis is incredibly swollen with blood.

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hi how u doin fine and u well bii have a nice day DONT TELL ME WHAT TO DO

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If I could rearrange the period table, I would put Uranium and Iodide together ;)

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You're place or mine? Both, you go to yours and I go to mine.

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Guy: You look two times as beautiful with makup on. Girl: Really? I think you would too.

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do you clean your pants with windex cause i can see myself in them

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Whats yo sign? Do not enter!

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Your skin would make a nice coat.

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him: why are you so gorgeous? her: i dont know i guess my parents had some really good sex.

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Yeah... you'll have to do.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!