Woman- is your penis erect? Male- no just FULL SIZED Woman- woah

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How much do you love me? Look at the stars and count them Bu-but it's afternoon Exactly

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Boy:do you know to spell "Idiot" with just one word? Girl:how? Boy:U

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Man at a restaurant (that is out of everything but bar stools and alcoholic drinks): Man: Die monster! You don't belong in this world! Woman: Uh? Oh! Nice tribute to the cheesy Castlevania lines! Man:Tribute!?! You steal men's souls and make them your slaves! Woman: Uh... well with most of you men lacking a spine nowadays... I cant truly disagree with you... Man: Your words are as empty as your soul! Mankind ill needs a savior such as you! Woman: Savior? Who do you think I am? But now I am annoyed *throws glass that breaks* have at you! *slaps man* Man: HYDRO STORM! Throws a flask of water upwards as it breaks on the floor splashing the woman... Woman: NOW I AM ALL WET! YOU MORON! Dont you know me? Man: Man: M-Maria? Uh... What happened? Shaft: Damn you broke free from your spell! But it is too late! Muahahaha! Castlevania has already become a bar! Richter: Well... that's fine to me, as long as Dracula does not STEAL MEN`S SOULS! Shaft: Relax, he is into business now... Richter: Your words are as empty as your soul! Mankind ill needs a businessman such as him! Shaft: Seriously! I invite you both at its VIP lounge and free beer to make up for the past mistakes... Richter: Excellent! But now feel my unbridled wrath!!!!! *punches Shaft* Shaft: Ouch! So... are we even now? Richter: Considering the free beer... okay... As they arrived Castle Barlevania they both got drunk and played "vampire killer" at the stage all night... Moral: Not much a Anti-Pick up line you say? Not only did Richter make a fool out of himself, but he also got her wet ;)

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So which of you ladies wants to recieve child support payments from me next year?

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-Eeeeeeeey girl how much does a polar bear weigh? -An adult male weighs around 350–680 kg (770–1,500 lb),[4] while an adult female is about half that.

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hi how u doin fine and u well bii have a nice day DONT TELL ME WHAT TO DO

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

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girl: i like you boy with downs: i liek trains

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Me: it smells in here Her: its maybe my perfume! Me: no i let a glorious fart fallowed my an ass crapping on my foot

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Did you just fart? 'cos you blew me away

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Guy: You look two times as beautiful with makup on. Girl: Really? I think you would too.

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My penis becomes hard and hard when I see your mom, but weak when I see you.

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I'm desperate, you'll do.

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If you were a booger i would pick you Good thing you have no hands

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- Haven't we met before? - Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic.

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-There's a 'U' in beautiful. -Yeah, and there's a 'U' in ugly.

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Girl: I was just wondering... Boy: Smell my armpits on July 24th, 2016!

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You stole my heart..... Don't worry, i have three more back home in my freezer.

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Welcome to DIE!

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You seem rapable enough... wanna see some back alleys with me?

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Didnt I just meet you at world of warcraft? My nickname is desperaterapist838493

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Batman enters a bar: Batman: Ladies... I am Batman... *everyone runs out screaming* Batman: *facepalm* Moral: Want to be feared? Well what did you expect? Who I am? Are you dense? Retarded or something? I am the goddamn Moral-Man!

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WOMAN! GO MAKE ME A SANDWICH NOW! Girl: But I do not even know you!? Man: Oh... uh.. hi sexy.. wanna get to know me?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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