-Can I have your name? -Why? Don’t you already have one?

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Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa what I don't want for Christmas?

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'I' and 'U' together. Really? Cos' I like it just the way it is... With 'N' and 'O' together.

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Hey this is crazy and I just met you so here's the kitchen a sandwich maybe?

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Guy - Hey baby, what's your sign? Girl - ?

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Your teeth remind me of a song Which one? Black and Yellow

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- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

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- Hey, what do you do for a living? - Female impersonator

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are you from tennessee? because your license plate said it.

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Hey there little girl there is a party down my pants you want to come? Oh I'm sorry i don't speak Herpes.

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Why couldnt susie see out her window? She was not home, see was to busy drowning in the ocean.

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I might not be the best looking guy here but im the only one talking to you

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-Go on ,don’t be shy. Ask me out. -Okay, get out.

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-Hey, have we met before? -No, because I don't remember ever seeing a face that made me this nauseous.

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If you were a booger, I'd pick you first.

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Man... MAN! Sorry if I just skimmed that last message dude, but if you getting me that shit, you are my fucking God, you got a new custom engine or something? Whatever man, im getting over there right now, Son, I might actually try the towing trick, because that might make me arrive at your place (no worries wont tell anyone where your playboy mansion is at) but you still got it there right? MORAL MORAL MORAL MORAL... Oh and no, id never ever use that piece of shit I used to call a car in the forest, if you are serious man, ill take the damn cab! I mean man, I just cant wait to tell the beardy little faggot at the carshop to stick that yeah "car" up his gay ass! Seriously dude, my phone aint working but that can wait, you really mean I can have the car? Seriously, how much? I got some money.

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Every kiss begins with K. Except for ugly, that begins with U.

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- Your place or mine? - Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.

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Don't turn this rape into a murder.

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Are your parents retarded? Because you're something special

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Hey, I got some of the worst ratings on Horsehead network! Really? Moral: You bet!

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Losers pick-up sex guide. 1. Create a beautiful environment at home, with candles, romantic music, etc. 2. Buy lube, some sexy female underwear, a couple of sex toys, some erotic magazines to excite you`re partner. 3. Pick-up you`re stuff and masturbate.

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Man at bar: Hey girls... want my banana in your pajamas? ;) ;) ;) Girls: YEAH! Man: "thinks for himself..."... man I never get this reaction from girls.. you are a bunch of skanks and sluts... (leaves the bar) In the end, we are never happy with what we get are we? yeah... this is kinda the moral of this story... (Ps: My banana in your pajamas... I got a girlfriend, but someday Im gonna try that pick up line... hahahaha

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"You'll do."

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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