So, you're a girl, huh?

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Tenth year anniversary Marriage. So what was your name again? Annoying Bitch? Old Hag? I forgot...

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if you were my sister i'd totally get with you.

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Sugar-free sugar cookies

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Boy: If i can rearrange the keyboard, i'll put U and I next to each other Girl: It's already together dumbass

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Are you a magnet because I'm attracted to you No, but I am trained in several martial art, so get the heck away from me

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No more morals? I read his crap for hours! Moral: ;( Bye man.

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Are you a computer technician? Because you turn my hardware into software.

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If you go out with me there might be some smegma in it for you.

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Those pants are very becoming on you, of course if i were on you id be cumming too.

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You're ugly, but you intrigue me.

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A couple wanted to try something different in the bedroom, The wife suggests they do it in a 69 position so they get into position but the wife lets one off in the husbands face she apologises and they try again when the wife farts again the husband gets up to leave and says no I don't think I can do this another 67 times!

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greetings clarisse...

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Male: You're so beautiful. Female: Well thank you. Male: Yeah, you look just like my Mom.

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Guy: Have you ever been surfing? Girl: No; Yes Guy: Wanna surf in my jizz?

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sHe; Theirs a "L" in love. he; and theirs a L in Lick my penis.

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Guy texting random girl: *u must b wearing space pants cuz ur a*s is out of this world *no im wearing baseball pants cuz my a*s is out of ur leage (this girl deserves an award)

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Grapist: I bet you like getting Graped, tied up and beaten muahahahahaha! I am so gonna do the worst things to you! Woman: YES PLEASE! Man: MAAAAAAAAAAAN your not fun anymore... Moral: Its not grape if she wants it... and I guess grapists dont like that... remember that girls whenever someone is gonna rape you just say YES unless they yell surprise though... then its surprise sex.

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boy: hey wanna hang out some time?! girl: O MY GOD! r u hannah montanna?!

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I like your eyes. My eyes don't like you.

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Aww seriously dude? That would be awesome, gotta warn you though, this car repair dude, is really ripping my shirt off but you know, ill send you the bill. 666 (my phone is on the charger, get me a new one and ill write a fucking essay about my sisters ass and post it here I really need a phone)

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have met you before? i like eating my dogs shit.

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Are you from Austrailia? Because I'd like to put my tongue in your butthole

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J.B: You smile, I smile. Girl: I wasn't smiling...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!