-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? -I'm an atheist.

Are you an angel? 'Cause you're the only ten I see.

- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put I and U together. - Would you also change it so that I is an object, therefore making your previous sentence grammatically correct? And besides, I already organized the alphabet so that N and O are right next to each other.

-don't sit on the table, people eat there! -don't sit on that chair, people sit there!

-I'll do anything,no matter how kinky it is if you can say it in three words. -Clean my house.

if i was a fly, i'd be all over you, because you are the SHIT.

Are you on your period, because there's a blood stain on your pants

Man: May I please sit next to you for a brief moment? Woman: Sure :), you`re such a gentleman :). Man: Would you care for a bit of violent rapage in you`re anus?

Are you from Tennessee? Because your accent sounds stupid.

so... you're a girl,huh?

Am I having a erection or am I just glad to see you? Moral: My d1ck in my hand is HARDly a better option than my d1ck in a bush.

Didnt I just meet you at world of warcraft? My nickname is desperaterapist838493

At some random bar: Man: I am Duke Nukem! Woman: DISGUSTING! Man: Huh? Moral: Sometimes you have to play the new games to understand the old...

Dating tips 101: First you find a girl that likes you. Then you realize no girl likes you. Moral: Lesson done.

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Hey wanna have sex and get married! ......... sorry.......

Every kiss begins with K ;) Yeah to bad ugly begins with U

so how long have you been a bald ghost wombat?

Female: Hey can i buy you a drink? Male: I have AIDS.

Are you from tennessee? Cuz it looks like your missing some teeth.

cockface

GUY: are you trash? cuz i'd like to take you out friday night GIRL: are you trash? cuz you smell like it

Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

I am terribly sorry for talking to you, but I was wondering if...

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!