- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

So, you're a girl, huh?

Guy: Hey :) Guy: Hey to you too :) Don't jump to conclusions people. They're gay.

Hey girl, do you have a map? Becuase I keep getting lost when i try to find your house.

Your father must have been a theif, because you look like a pikiey

-So, what are you doing later? -Not you.

Guy: (any sexual pick up line) Girl: I'm sorry but I don't think there is enough room in my pants for two assholes.

HE ; " MY NAME'S BOND, JAMES BOND" SHE;" MY NAME'S , OFF!"

You're so hot, you should wear a burkha over your face.

your beauty surpasses that of the greek goddess aphrodite.

The word of the day is 'legs' , The word of tomorrow is Aardvark .

-Hey babe, wanna go to my place and bang all night long? -No you freak. -Well, I gave you a choice.

so how long have you been a bald ghost wombat?

"Hmm...you'll do."

He: did it hurt? She: when i fell from heaven? He: no. when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. go put some clothes on.

What did the priest say to the rabbi? We are both religious figures at the head of our places of worship.

Flipping a coin to give you my number or not to give you my number

At a bar: Hello! Moral: Keep the damn lines short! (A moral man original, not to be confused with the exploding bar or whoever put morals in their sstories, feel free to do so though! I mean anyone can see from the quality whose are mine ;)

if you were my sister i'd totally get with you.

I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium were going out and I was like O Mg.

Do you have an STD? No. DO you want one??

Man : Wanna go to my house tonight? Woman : I'm not sure if a rock can fit 2 people inside.

What's the difference between a Jew and a boyscout? The boyscout returned from camp.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book