-You smell nice Thanks....... -Have you ever thought of turning your sweat into perfume?

Damn, girl, you're hot... You look just like my mom.

hey wanna come back to my house, and help me kill my dog?

You look like one that does not charge for sex ;)

Are you an erection? 'Cause you're growing on me.

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Hey, you look like a hooker I fondled in Las Vegas

As a man I am afforded greater opportunity then my equally qualified female counterparts. I have made it a life goal use this opportunities for greater good.

If I could rearrange the period table, I would put Uranium and Iodide together ;)

Whats best about having sex with twenty six year olds?..... Theres twenty of them!

How you doin? go away- I have a gun

Hey baby that dress is amazing! It would look even better as a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor!

Male: You are a Drugs? Female: Why? because your so addicted to me? Male: Nope, You ruined my life!

-Do you come here often? -I'm about to.

Him: Has anyone ever told you that you are absolutely beautifull...?? Her: (smiles) and says no.. Him: there is a good reaseon for that..

Hi, I've taken like 8 dumps today... Wanna dance?

Guy: So do you wanna come over to my place? Girl: Not really but thanks for the offer.

Are you water? Because you are very shallow. Now GTFO.

Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car I want to rape you

Male - Your a sight for sore eyes Female - And your a sight that causes sore eyes

Are you from Tennessee? Youre the only 10 i see, and im 59. I bet we could 69 beautifully.

Hey baby. Do you drive a slug bug on a rainbow? If so, I'll drive.

- I think i lost my number, can i have yours? - I think i lost my number too.

Roses are red Violets are gold Get on your knees And do what your told

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!