Male: I would die for you... Female: Prove it

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- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

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do you like cows? no! i am a cow! oh!

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you know what rhymes with hug me LET'S HAVE SEX

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Guy: Thanks Girl: Why? Guy: Cuz you made me get rid of that boner

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: What? Him: When you fell out of the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down?

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What's worse than walking on a beach? Not walking on a beach.

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Hey, I got some of the worst ratings on Horsehead network! Really? Moral: You bet!

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baby please dont make this rape turn into a murder

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If you were a booger, that'd be pretty nasty.

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Im like a thief and ill steal your virginity!

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-I love you.

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-I bet you put extra sugar in your cereal every morning. -Aww, because I'm so sweet? -No. Because you're fat as hell.

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Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

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Boy-That's a nice outfit. Girl-Thanks!!! Boy- It would look even better scrunched up at the end of my bed.

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I dont have sex on the first date - only if the opportunity comes

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When a tractor fell on your face?

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Man: Wow you are my cousin? Damn girl you are hot! I mean nothing wrong you know, I was just wondering if you wanna get a innocent cup of coffee Woman: Uh, thanks, but I have never met you... Man: Not my cousin? Bah, what a turnoff im outta here... Moral: Yeah moral... Pffft! You will have an easier time finding Waldo here.

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Why couldnt susie see out her window? She was not home, see was to busy drowning in the ocean.

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Man enters bar: Man: I AM MORAL MAN! My spear shall cut down the zealots, and my shield shall block (yeah you wish) be used as a additional weapon to push people down so I can thrust my spear even deeper into their hatred filled hearts! Woman: WOW! Moral: This pickup line wont work of course... not for you you aren`t the one and only EPIC: MORAL MAN! ;) Aka Epic man to those that still fail to understand that my morals are morals for a new order! No more religious wars, no more pedophiles, no more hatecrime... stand by me, and I shall not only speak for you, but also fight for you!

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If you were on a shelf at build a bear workshop ....... I would stuff you , except it wouldn't be with cotton

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Vader getting it on ;): My sexual prowress overcomes even the power of the dark side. Can you even have sex? ... Uh... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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HE: You must have some hot buns. SHE: Yeah? HE: Cause you got a real butterface to go with them.

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Female: Hey do you wanna buy me a drink? Male: I really don't like your face.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!