HI, DO YOU KNOW WHY THEY CALL ME DOCTOR RABBIT THE HYMEN DESTROYER? Nero the clit collector: Actually this works pretty good, just wear a random rabbit costume, cut a hole where your CAWCK is, and make sure they are girls under twelve or below (because it kinda loses its meaning with little boys but fuck it anyways, yeah fuck it! FUCK IT TO THE LIMIT!) I work at a daycare center: Because I care.

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Do you believe in rape by first sight? Moral: I think its immoral enough as it is already.

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Are you from hogwarts, because I really want to put my basilisk into your chamber of secrets

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-Hey babe, wanna go to my place and bang all night long? -No you freak. -Well, I gave you a choice.

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How much per quarter hour? Actually do you do 10 minute blocks?

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Boy:do you know to spell "Idiot" with just one word? Girl:how? Boy:U

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Hey there little girl there is a party down my pants you want to come? Oh I'm sorry i don't speak Herpes.

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M. Do you want to go out with me? F. Okay but first take me to your place where we can be alone to make furious love to one another M. Wow this never happens I must be.. (Wakes up) dreaming

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-Your really nice plus i like girls with flat asses

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Hey, nice shoes..... Wanna F***?

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause the ground around you looks like it's cracked.

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A cat falls into a pool and a rooster laughs. Moral of the story, a wet p**** makes a happy c***

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How much does a polar bear weigh? On average 1135 lbs.

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Girl- Hey ily Boy- say it it just makes it that much better ;) Girl- I'm leaving you

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here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

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"Is this seat free?" "Yes, and if you sit on it, this seat will be free too"

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if you were my sister i'd totally get with you.

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Hey baby, you make me wanna get a job.

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Do you work at Subway? Cuz you just gave me a footlong

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I hope you know CPR, because you so ugly you take my breath away

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- You must be a parking ticket cause you have fine written all over you - You must be a wellfare check then.

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I'm heading back to my place. You want to come? Sorry, you strike me as a person who comes all by himself.

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boy: my dick is 10 inches girl: mine's too

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That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, I'd be coming too.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!