- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

"Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material." "I'm vegan."

"You look like an angel that fell from heaven and hit its face on the pavement."

- Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason - Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!

the roses were red and the violets were nice but if you want to get with me you better up the price

on Halloween Male: My name's Dick, and you're a very pretty PUSSY-cat. Female: I'll cut off your penis.

Heard at a bra: Hi I am Moral man, the third most infamous guy at a list where Beiber is first. Girl: OMG I MUST HAVE YOU! Moral: ooooh... ANTI Joke duh... I thought this was great pickup lines!

What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

I'm an Ice Bear, I guess i just broke the "ICE" between us ....

You know, you can't spell "stud" without STD and U

I'm a black belt at pretty much everything, Karate, Larate, Jiu-Jitsu, Kickpunching, Beltmaking, Taekwondo.........bedroom...|:D ~Rick, the Adventure Sphere

-Hey Baby, wanna date? -No thanks, I'm allergic to fruits

-Darling, I will never stop pursuing you. Even from the ends of the earth, I will follow you wherever you go. Really, I love you that much. -"Honey", I will call the police and have you thrown in jail for stalking me. Really, I hate you that much.

all in all it was a good orgy

If you were a booger, that'd be pretty nasty.

Did you just fart? Cause it smells like shit in here

him: why are you so gorgeous? her: i dont know i guess my parents had some really good sex.

If i could rearrange the alphabet, id violate your ass hole.

How much does a polar bear weigh? On average 1135 lbs.

is your name angel cuz that's all i see? is your name asshole cuz that's all i see

Guy: Have you ever been surfing? Girl: No; Yes Guy: Wanna surf in my jizz?

Roses are red, violets are blue I thought I was ugly, but then I met you

Skilled man enters a bar: Man: Lady, I am a scientist... Lady: So? Man: I also have black belt in several martial arts... Lady: Your point? Man: uh... I have uh... Lady: Sigh... gets up and leaves Moral: Knowing what and how to be attractive to women is an art on its own...

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book