How much does a whales weigh? How much? Just enough to make you look skinny.

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Man: Do you like a sensitive guy? Women: Yeah, I used to be one.

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On a scale from 1 to 10, can I get your number?

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That outfit looks fantastic on you... ..it would look even better in an evidence bag

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GIRL: I bet you say that to all the girls you meet. MAN: How much you want to bet? No wait, I better not make that bet. (or) MAN: Only half the ones I get this far in conversation with. The other half are a little bit easier to get in bed with.

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How much per quarter hour? Actually do you do 10 minute blocks?

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with glue? My d***

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I was a little bit nervous to talk to you at first, but thankfully my Aides encouraged me to do it.

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Can you leave your door unlocked and your underwear drawer open when you go to work?

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rohypnol. rape drug

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I am Lucifer, my color is blue I already got my queen TO HELL WITH YOU! Moral: Know my name and fear it, I am now and forever.

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I dont have sex on the first date - only if the opportunity comes

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Would you like to be the lone mother of my children?

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If you were a booger, I would pick up you first.

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Male - Your a sight for sore eyes Female - And your a sight that causes sore eyes

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Try to put your arm around her. If she pushes you away, then say: "Relax! Relax. I'll pay for the first abortion!"

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You must have a large mass because i am highly attracted to you

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BOY: Are you a chicken? GIRL: Why? BOY: Because I'll like you to lay on my eggs all day...

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I'll eat your poop

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You wanna have sex and get married?? Ok... Sorry.

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Man: Is your name sherly? Woman: No... Man: because id like to Fuc* you in the ass and call you sherly

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does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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-You must be tired, you've been running through my mind all day. -You look like a rapist.

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A man is pulled over by a police officer and a conversation takes place: Man: What's the problem officer? Cop: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone. Man: No sir, I was going 65. Wife: Oh Steven. You were going 80. (Man gives his wife a dirty look.) Cop: I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light. Man: Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light! Wife: Oh Steven, you've known about that tail light for weeks. (Man gives his wife a dirty look.) Cop: I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt. Man: Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car. Wife: Oh Steven, you never wear your seat belt. Man: Shut your mouth, woman! Cop: Ma'am, does your husband always talk to you this way? Wife: No, only when he's drunk.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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