Excuse me, does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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-If you are looking at a girl and she says What are you looking at? -I thought you were good looking, but I was mistaken.

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Excuse me lady, may I say that you got wonderful hands? Aww please yes. Would you like a drink my buy? Please :D How classy. Why thank you, would you fancy some hard anal sex on camera for end up on youtube? Moral: He is keeping it classy...

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Yeah... you'll have to do.

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Hey can I have your number? No.

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You have the nicest smile I could ever hope to come across.

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I have a knife, Maddie. Get in the van.

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Hey girl... U remind me of my pinkie toe.. Ur small cite and I'll probably bang u on the coffee table later

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Try to put your arm around her. If she pushes you away, then say: "Relax! Relax. I'll pay for the first abortion!"

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Man : Wanna go to my house tonight? Woman : I'm not sure if a rock can fit 2 people inside.

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Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

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Hi, GET IN THE VAN, Drink this, Don't Scream whisper* "does ur body fit in my trunk?"

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hey, your cute. hey, your not.

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TURRETES (or however you spell it) GUY ON PICKUP! Man: IM GONNA RAPE YOUUUUUUUUUUUU! Woman: EEEEEEEEEEK! (runs away) Man: I mean... I tried to say you seem nice...:( Moral: BOB SAGET!

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Pick up lines from the stoneage: Man: RARGH GROG BEAT YOU WITH CLUB! AND MAKE THE LITTLE GROGS WITH YOU! Woman: But I just had one! Aww not this again whatever... Moral: And over time women adjusted to clubs and often end up knocked up when passing out in them, While men that own their own clubs usually end up knocking up a lot more of them... Some things never change...

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- If you were a booger I'd pick you first - If you were a booger I'd throw you away...

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- I would go to the end of the world for you. - Yes, but would you stay there, please?

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You wanna have sex and get married?? Ok... Sorry.

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I'm craving some bacon, wanna strip?

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On a scale from one to ten, you're about a two.

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-Go on don't be shy, Ask me out. -Okay Go out.

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Are you a dementor? Cause you take my breath away.

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Man: Hey, want to go back to my apartment and engage in intercourse? Woman: No

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Hey baby you looking for a stud? Cuz I've got the STD and all I need now is U

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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