-You smell nice Thanks....... -Have you ever thought of turning your sweat into perfume?

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MAN: hey, are youa gust of wind? cause you blow me away! WOMAN: really? that makes me happy! i was getting kinda sick of you being here!

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A man walks up to the woman, and says, "I'd like to take you on a date. How about dinner tonight?" The woman agrees, and they both have a wonderful time at a fancy Italian restaurant.

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You look like one that does not charge for sex ;)

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GET IN THE VAN!!!

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Male: Did it hurt??? Female: What, when I fell from heaven? Male: No, the first time you did anal!!!

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- If i could rearange the alphabet i'd puit you and i together. - That's not necessary because N and O are already together.

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Mirrors can't talk, luckily for you they can't laugh either

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(in a loud club) -Do you wanna dance?! -Umm, with YOU? NO! -What?! oh no, i said, "you look FAT in those PANTS!"

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Ever had violent sex with a murderer/rapist? ;) ;)

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your beauty surpasses that of the greek goddess aphrodite.

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Roses are red violets are blue i got a gun get in the van!

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Im the demanding customer, your Dominos Pizza, I will make you Cum in 30 minutes or less.

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You're hot, I'm ugly. Lets make average babies.

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You wanna have sex and get married?? Ok... Sorry.

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Are you the sun? Because you need to stay about 92,960,000 miles away from me.

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At a drinking place :P: Man: You dare mock the great Sh... Woman: I am sorry I did not mean to humiliate that much... ehehehehe you are just a stupid jlttle nerd and all... :) Man: You will die moral... Woman: What?! Uh... did I mention how awesome you are? What was your name again? Man: You weak pathetic fool! 8 hours later: Woman: Please! Let me stay! Just for a little longer! Barman: Sigh... fine have a drink on the house. Woman: *sips drink and dies* Barman: Mission complete sir, she died instantly! Man: Instantly without pain? THAT WAS PATHETIC! Now... SUICIDE! Barman: No I refuse! Man: Drink it... or face the true WRATH OF SHAO KAHN! Barman: The true wrath? ANYTHING BUT THAT!*Punches himself in the balls hoping he dies from the pain, passes out and tries again* Man Is That your best? That was pathetic! Its official, you suck! Bhahahahahahaha! Moral: Fear the Wrath of Shao Kahn!

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Why don't you slip into something more comfortable? Like a coma?

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Is there a mirror in your pants? If so, you should shove it up your ass, it would probably make you look better.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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At a bar... sigh... Woman: Hey cutie wanna go home? "Man" hello I am twelve... what is this? Moral: Hello I am eight... what is this?

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put you and that other girl together.

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Man: Honey, I can't choose between watching golf or porn? Wife: Porn. You already know how to golf.

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My greatest strength is my self-deprecating sense of humor, but its probably not worth getting to know me.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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