-Hey, have we met before? -No, because I don't remember ever seeing a face that made me this nauseous.

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Female: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Male: I'm actually a broom in disguise.

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Man: Wanna hear a joke about my C*ck, nevermind, it's too long Woman: Wanna hear a joke about my P*ssy, oh wait you'll never get it

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Girls hate me, they always discuss about how they regret fucking with me over and over again. Moral: Thumb me down, I know ya love me.

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- Yo baby can I have your number? - Sure! My number is one *sticks up middle finger*

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Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Guy: When you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down

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Yo girl... My feelings keep growing, I just have to say it, but it might be too soon, it might even risk our friendship. Awww, just say it. Ok girl, I hate you more for every day, you fucking ugly bitch, if it where not for your money, id leave right away. Moral: Its not about what you want, its about what you need, therefore I decided I only need whatever I want, case closed.

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Are you water? Because you are very shallow. Now GTFO.

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Does it smell in here or it just you?

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-can i buy you a drink? i buy you a taxi?

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(this is only funny if ur a guy!) you go to a party im a man you get a drink im a man you laugh with friends im a man u see a hot chick im a man you invite her over to ur place im a man you go up in the bedroom im a man you go to pull her pants off im a man and she says... im a man!

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What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

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-You know I've always had a thing for blondes -thats funny, i've always had a thing for girls

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Hey baby wana come over for dinner? Sure whats cookin? Your dead body after I kill ur ugly face derrp

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How much does a polar bear weigh? 1000 pounds

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-If I take you home, will you iron my clothes and make me a sandwich?

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You're a bit heavier but i think I can fit you in a barrel.

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A polar bear and a penguin were taking a bath. The polar bear asked the penguin to pass the soap. the penguin responded by saying,"What do i look like a microwave?"

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Dont blame me for using moral all the time its just part of my sig...nature XD Moral: Not a pick up line, so its pretty anti.

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are you from subway cause you givin me a footlong

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Do you believe in rape by first sight? Moral: I think its immoral enough as it is already.

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Girl: I was just wondering... Boy: Smell my armpits on July 24th, 2016!

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Male: (Pulls Female in close, strokes her hair, and mutters 'My precious' over and over to himself)

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-Wanna have sex? -No -Damn

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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