Hey, do you want to dance? No.

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-Did you just fart? Cause you blew me away.

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Yo wazzup hoes? You knew black guys have the biggest dicks ever? ;) Uh, so what? You are white. Oh... yeah... Moral: Damn wiggers.

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Q: Continue the pattern. 1,2,3,4,..... A: other numbers.

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Her: Guess what? Him: What? Her Yo Mama! Him: Is she that slut i did last night?

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Every kiss begins with K. Except for ugly, that begins with U.

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If I asked you out on a date, would your answer to that question be the same as your answer to this question?

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The word of the day is legs, Lets go upstairs and spread the word.

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Do you wanna go halves in a bastard?

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"You look like Carmen Electra's deformed, burned, dismembered sister..."

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He-Are you from Tennesse? Still He-Cu'z I wanna suck ur face off..

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-words can't describe how beautiful you are. -aaaawwwwwwww. -but numbers can. 3/10. -fffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-

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Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

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Him - Would you like to dance? Her - NO! Him - I'm sorry. I think you misunderstood me. I said, "You look fat in those pants."

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M. you have a sweet pussy. W. WHAT!? M. Your cat, she is very friendly

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-ILY -Aw. Spell it out it will make it more special. -I'm Leaving You

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In the USA: Man: Hello, I am half Iraq and half Afghanistan, my name is Osama Bin Allah! Girl: Oh... Uh em... I do not mind you nor anything but, you are like uh... civilized and stuff right? Just asking! Man: Of course miss, so how many camels to get into your pussy? Girl: OMG! Man: WAIT YOU MISHEAR ME! I SAY HOW MANY CARAMELS TO GET INTO YOUR... never mind... Moral: USA discovers they do not have nuclear weapons and then gives them nuclear reactors?

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Hey gurl, you smell like tape!

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Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Yeah sure, ill just go grab my gag and handcuffs. Male: ...

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my love for you is like diarrhea. i can never hold it in

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Girl, wanna fuck rite now? Sure! Man! You are such a hoe! *walks away disgusted* Moral: Be careful for what you ask for.

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If you were attacked by a bear with chainsaw arms i hope it stays away from your face, because I think you're cute.

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Don't worry, I love fat birds....why are you crying?

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Criminals are even more smarter these days My wife woke me up in the middle of the night and said that there were burglars downstairs so I went quietly looking for them when I realised I'm not married

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!