Man: Your red thumbs cannot hurt me! Im the MoralmanBitch! *Throws couch at woman* WHOAAAAAAAAAARGH!* Woman: *dead* Man:Hey wake up bitch! HEY! I said wake up or ill have my way with you!... Moral got jugs! Moral: Works every time

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if i was a fly, i'd be all over you, because you are the SHIT.

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A: Wanna go get some pizza and then have sex at my place?? B: No.. B: U don't like pizza? Some chinees then?

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I love Mark Wahlberg!

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What do u get when u mix a black a guy and an octopus The best dam cotton pickin machine you'll ever see!

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guy: r u from mcdonalds, coz im luvin it :D Girl: r u from burger king coz ur fat :L

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Man: I would kill anyone at anytime for a kiss from you. Woman: Kill yourself now.

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What do you do for a living?" "I'm a professional athlete." "Oh really? What sport do you play?" "Golf.

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Did it hurt when you fell from the whore tree and banged every single guy on your way down?

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Nerdy Pokemon Pickup he: i want to squirrtle on your jigglypuff she: I want to boulder smash your face

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I think your cute. I though you were cute, until I saw you...

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-Hey sit on my face and I will guess your weight

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"Do you like me?" "Do pigs fly?"

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- Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? - No but I scraped my knees when I climbed up from hell

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Hey good looking, what some mayonnaise?

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Close you`re eyes and open you`re mouth. *unzips pants*

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm using my hand but thinking of you ;)

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-- Hey, can I have your number? -- 12

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Hey baby, are you Star Trek? Because I watch you every night in the darkness.

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When a tractor fell on your face?

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"Hey did I not meet you at the singles and desperates club?"

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-Go on don't be shy, Ask me out. -Okay Go out.

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Hey Baby, Whats your name? Dave ...(silence)...

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There's a reason why they call my penis the Bunker Buster.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!