You seem rapable enough... wanna see some back alleys with me?

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Hey, are you an angel? Because you smell like you've been dead for a while

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- If i could rearange the alphabet i'd puit you and i together. - That's not necessary because N and O are already together.

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together -The order of the alphabet is arbitrary. It's not my fault that you kept U and I apart.

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Guy - Hey baby, what's your sign? Girl - ?

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It's not Rapee If you yell surprise!

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Boy: Hey girl, do you wanna play hard to get? Girl: No. Boy: That's the spirit!

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Mario: Ey princess, wanna make the sexy time eh? Princess: With a fat Italian plumber? HELL NO! Bowser: MWAHAHAHA I AM SO GONNA RAPE YOU WITH MY SPINY DICK! Princess: HELP HELP MARIO I WILL DO ANYTHING JUST SAVE ME! NO BOWSER PLEASE DO NOT PUT IT IN THERE! ITS TOO TIGH... Shigeru Miyamoto: So this is how I wanted to make the Super Mario series... sexy eh? Girl: DISGUSTING! Shigeru Miyamoto: Well what do you think about the idea with Monkey Dong and the other girl tha...HEY WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

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If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd probably leave it as is, seems to be working OK just fine without my internvention. And imagine the work it'd create in terms of all the re-filing alone. Librarians would have apoplexy, and if I came out I was responsible..well, there'd be hell to pay. No, thank you, but no thank you, the alphabet can stay as it is, no matter how hot your body.

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why cant you comb your hair cuz you got cancer othere guy :ahahahaah fag

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Have you just been fishing? The strong fishy smell seems to be coming from you.

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If we were confronted, by a vicious man-eating bear with chain-saws for hands and fangs, holding a hammer; than I would sincerley hope you wouldn't be harmed because you're pretty.

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My greatest strength is my self-deprecating sense of humor, but its probably not worth getting to know me.

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Guy: Did you use Windex on your pants? Girl: No, why? Guy: Because I see myself in your pants.

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Does this rag smell of chloroform to you?

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Hey, Are You From Tennessee, Because Your License Plate Says Tennessee.

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Guy- I would do anything for you. Women- I wouldn't do you for anything!

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There's a reason why they call my penis the Bunker Buster.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I cant rhyme, ever since my dog and I were walking down the street and then he died and then i cried and then i died and then he cried

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Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

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hey,are you a parking ticket? because nobody likes you.

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-I looked up beautiful in the thesaurus today and your name was included. -Thanks! Hey, I saw your name next to jerk.

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Hey, I may not be too smart, I may not have a big dick, I may not be strong nor cool, but at least I uh...

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Hey girl! Faggot.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!