Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn.

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-can i buy you a drink? i buy you a taxi?

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I have no gag reflex.

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Hey, we have coresponding genetailia, we should converge in sexual intercourse.

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Is Heaven missing an Angel? Because I have an erection.

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"Don't scream"

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Damn gurl, are you a microwave? Cause for sure you are burning me hot.

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- Haven't we met before? - Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic.

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-Your feet must be tired 'cuz you've been running through my mind. -Yea, I was running away from you.

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Walking to your car alone later?

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-I can see forever in your eyes. -But all I can see is never in yours.

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-You look like a dream. -Go back to sleep.

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Tonight might be a convienient night for us to have some intercourse.

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- I can tell that you want me. - Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave.

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-don't sit on the table, people eat there! -don't sit on that chair, people sit there!

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Your body would look good in my trunk.

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Your father must be a thief, because I saw him stealing at Target earlier.

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-What`s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar? -What`s it like being the biggest liar in the world?

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ur so hot, i'd let u put ur vagina inside of me

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- Does this rag smell like ether? - MMMPPPHHRPHRRG!

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On a scale from one to ten, you're about a two.

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A 85 year old man was at a bar, he goes up to the first hot thing he sees and asks do I come here often?

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- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

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- Your place or mine? - Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!