Are you a dementor? Cause you take my breath away.

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet... that would be nice..

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Would you like to be the lone mother of my children?

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Guy: Girl, I wish you were a car door, cause I'd slam you all night Girl: Well I have a car, how about I run you over with it instead?

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-Heyyy there (; -Im lesbian.

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Guy: I got you a gift. It's a Necklace. Girl: Awww thats so nice. Guy: BAZINGA Its my dick.

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I'm jealous of every girl that hugs you, Because for that one second she held my entire world.

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How much per quarter hour? Actually do you do 10 minute blocks?

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-Wanna have sex? -No -Damn

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause you d*** sure look like a demon!

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Is Heaven missing an Angel? Because I have an erection.

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-hey girl, you must be a pirate cause you got a lot of booty

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Guy: Hey baby, did you come by car? Girl: No I walked. Guy: Well I can make you come in mine.

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Man: Honestly! I am just desperate, and besides you are damn hot! Woman: Lets go to your place ;) Moral: This works, the anti-part is that no one will believe me nor try it themselves... Incredible how the easiest way is the least used...

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Your the penisbutter to my vagmite;)

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Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together Woman: What does ui spell?

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Your skin would make a nice coat.

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Guy: You look like a suitable mate and I'd thoroughly enjoy engaging in rough, sweaty sex with you and your lady parts.

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She - Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? becuase your-- He - I did not fall from heaven, you ignorant little twat.

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-words can't describe how beautiful you are. -aaaawwwwwwww. -but numbers can. 3/10. -fffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-

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Mother: Fuck me son fuck me harder. Me: Mother no! My body is not ready aaaaaaaaaarghhh! Moral: Why do dreams have to stop when it gets good? Dont know son, ready for round two?

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roses are red violets are blue My dog gives me a bigger orgasm then you

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hey baby i just came in my pants

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are u an angle because i have a boner oh what fail

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!