-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? -I'm an atheist.

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-Insert man's line here- -Wanna get laid?- -TOTALLY!- -Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.-

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He says "Where have you been all my life" She says "Hiding from you....how the hell did you find me?"

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As a man I am afforded greater opportunity then my equally qualified female counterparts. I have made it a life goal use this opportunities for greater good.

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Male: Get in the van.

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Man: Do you like a sensitive guy? Women: Yeah, I used to be one.

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I wish I was your math momework, because then I would be really hard and you'd be doing me on the desk.

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-If I could arrange the alphabet, that would be cool.

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Him - Would you like to dance? Her - NO! Him - I'm sorry. I think you misunderstood me. I said, "You look fat in those pants."

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Hey gurl, you smell like tape!

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He - Hey Dreamboat! She - *turns around He - No you, shipwreck

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Man: Hey, want to go back to my apartment and engage in intercourse? Woman: No

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- hey id like my order for you - ok we put extra punch with it these days

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together -The order of the alphabet is arbitrary. It's not my fault that you kept U and I apart.

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"I prefer animals... but your so ugly you remind me of my dog"

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Girl, I wish you were a car door, cause I'd slam you all night

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Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

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ANYWAY... I have been married for around X years right? (My wife is anon because reasons valid reasons!) And I told my wife "Babe, you know what you got married into baby, how about you and I consider having a third one in the bed... No not a guy, thats disgusting, you agree? Awwride! So anyways, she was like "Uh... Ask me again in a year I need to think things trough, and I want you for myself..." Next week we was fucking my new (back then neighbor) which is 28 or whatever (I dont remember my neighbors name BAHAHA (actual laugher)... Peeps, say what you want about me, ill be the one fucking the prom queen tomorrow... And you know, maybe someone else, sex with more than my waifu the prom queen is addictive, I mean sharing (salive, cum juices) is caring right? Okay, I better stop here, Rebecca (SHADDAP AUTOCORRECT ITS HOW HER NAME IS SPELLED... I guess) is upset... No not because I am typing this, but because I am out here freezing my ballz off smoking her ciggs... Man The great stuff about "decent equipment" is that I dont need all that much energy, just the speed to keep the girls screaming!

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Male: It's super hard and long. Female: I have always been under the impression that the GED is relatively simple.

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Business Y U No Advertise?

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-Why is one breast bigger than the other? -because I popped it and all the silicone leaked out

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male- are you from Tenessee female- why? am I the only ten you see? male- no, i was just going to say you look a little inbred.

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he: hey,do you have a phone? she: yeah! why,do you want it? he: no,you should consider selling it and doing a plastic surgery with the money.

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Ay girl, those jeans make your ass look fat. Now I'ma get you pregnant while you make breakfast.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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