- Your place or mine? - Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.

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- Is this seat empty? - Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.

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- Haven't I seen you someplace before? - Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.

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Man: Hey baby, I hear you are lesbian, that sounds really sexy! ;) Woman: Take the damn hint asshole! I am a lesbian! Man: Hey! Woah! Relax! I already know where you come from, say, are all girls in Lesbia this hostile? Moral: They are friendlier in south Lesbia...

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You like my boobies ;) Girl: I said no you disgusting fat bastard! Moral: What fucking kind of MOTHERFUCKING MORAL are you expecting to find here?!?

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-You smell nice Thanks....... -Have you ever thought of turning your sweat into perfume?

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MAN: hey, are youa gust of wind? cause you blow me away! WOMAN: really? that makes me happy! i was getting kinda sick of you being here!

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A man walks up to the woman, and says, "I'd like to take you on a date. How about dinner tonight?" The woman agrees, and they both have a wonderful time at a fancy Italian restaurant.

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You look like one that does not charge for sex ;)

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GET IN THE VAN!!!

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Hey Baby, Whats your name? Dave ...(silence)...

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"Wow, you look so thin! Are you wearing a girdle?"

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Damn girl did you just come from the dump? Cause you smell like shit.

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He: Did it hurt? She: When I fell from heaven? heard it before... He: No, when you fell from the ugly tree!

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Sorry, I don't wanna date a guy who's best pickup line is cocaine.

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Male: hey sexy whats your sign? Female: dead end!

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male: hey i like you can i have your number female: what number? male: your pin number i want your money

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rape? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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Girl: I was just wondering... Boy: Smell my armpits on July 24th, 2016!

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-Hi miss are you a ketchup? -hey is this some corny pick-up line?,,,okay fine. why? -because I want to dip my hot dog to you

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wanna try out my joystick? (gamer-joke)

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men: Do you ride horses, because I'd let you ride me all night!

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Miss excuse me but... Moral: Admitt it fucker, you cant pick up a girl by apolgizing for whatever you are gonna do beforehand. GIMME FIVE! (red thumbs, red is the color of love or something)

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Man: Honey, I can't choose between watching golf or porn? Wife: Porn. You already know how to golf.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!