He says "Where have you been all my life" She says "Hiding from you....how the hell did you find me?"

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Male: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put I and U togather Female: Oh really, because if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put F and U together.

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hey your pretty... pretty ugly!

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- I want to give myself to you. - Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.

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I have the smallest erected dick in town, if you don't believe me ask my mama!

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- I know how to please a woman. - Then please leave me alone.

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Man: Wanna hear a joke about my C*ck, nevermind, it's too long Woman: Wanna hear a joke about my P*ssy, oh wait you'll never get it

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- Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason - Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!

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- How do you like your eggs in the morning? - Unfertilized !

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- So what do you do for a living? - I'm a female impersonator.

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- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

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Dont people ever get tired of PRETENDING like they dont need others aproval? I NEED APPROVAL I NEED APPROVAL! Moral: I REALLY DO! YEEEEEEEEES BECAUSE...Uh...you matter more than me? Nah, nothing like that, only I matter more than you...

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- Your place or mine? - Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.

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- Is this seat empty? - Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.

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- Haven't I seen you someplace before? - Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.

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Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

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SEE WHAT’S UP, DOWN UNDER.

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If you were homework, I would slam you on my table and do you all night long.

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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Do you know why I know we're going to have sex tonight?

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Girl: You look so happy, I am glad this is working out. Freud: Maaaaan I was just thinking about fucking my mom! Moral: Sickman Fraud.

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You look like one that does not charge for sex ;)

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GET IN THE VAN!!!

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Girl, wanna fuck rite now? Sure! Man! You are such a hoe! *walks away disgusted* Moral: Be careful for what you ask for.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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