- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn.

you actually look alright with the lights on.

"Don't scream"

- I can make your bed rock. - Oh yeah? An earthquake can too..

You're place or mine? Both, you go to yours and I go to mine.

Is Heaven missing an Angel? Because I have an erection.

-Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots? -Sorry, I don't date outside my species.

Man: Do you sleep on your stomach? Woman: No... Man: Can I?

if you were my sister i'd totally get with you.

-What`s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar? -What`s it like being the biggest liar in the world?

-Does beauty run in your family? -It obviously doesn't in yours!

Did the lord take the thunder from the skies, and put it in your thighs?

You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear

Are you an erection? 'Cause you're growing on me.

-You look like a dream. -Go back to sleep.

Man: Wanna hear a joke about my Cck, nevermind, it's too long Woman: Wanna hear a joke about my Pssy, oh wait you'll never get it

-What's your name sexy? -Taken!

-Can I buy you a drink? -Go ahead, but only if you buy my boyfriend one too!

Does this rag smell like chloroform?

- So, wanna go back to my place? - Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?

You're so hot I'd do you sober.

- Can I have your number? - Sure. Twelve.

M: Wanna play dynamite? W: what's that? M: I lie on my back and you blow the sh** out of me.

ur so hot, i'd let u put ur vagina inside of me

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book