Female Police officer: Anything you say can and will be held against you. Me: Boobies.

In regard to the post below. I'm not even joking, one of my mates actually said that to a girl.

You got some junk in the trunk, can I dump my load in there too?

Are you water? Because you are very shallow. Now GTFO.

Roses are red, something something, I am just too desperate to concentrate please let me just put it in you.

- if I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together - If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U next to Y, just why

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When a tractor fell on your face?

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

Do you wanna go halves in a bastard?

- Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven? - Nah, angels like me, have wings.

Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

Pick up lines from the stone age: Fail. Man: Hello, you look beautiful, I speak very well, and if you allow me to make love with you, I promise I will protect you and raise the child with you :)! Woman: WHAT? A guy without wild chesthair that speaks instead of grunting and yelling? You to sex me and you do not even got a club? I am SOOO gonna go to Grogg instead! He has like the biggest club and knows how to really HIT a woman! Moral: I would say somethings do change, but Id rather be Grogg than the loser above, of course I prefer hitting ON women first, if that does not work I... Oh right, I am married :P

Sickman Fraud: Hmm you look remotely alike my mother... Woman: Uh? Sickman Fraud: Yes fucking you should das probably give me some release, die reason to resist me is not necessary, you envy my pingas and I can assign it to you if you put on this ugly wig and yell "bad boy" whilzt I das fukte das rassenhol... Woman: OMG SICK! Moral: The father of modern psychology? Seriously?! I was going for a bachelor in psychology studies, but its just disgusting.

Those pants are very becoming on you, of course if i were on you id be cumming too.

A modified classic, props to the original poster: Man: Ask me out! Woman: Ok, get out! Man: No no, I said ASK me out. Woman: Okay... will you please get out? Man: No but thanks for asking me out, I am so gonna tell your friends how I rejected you asking me out. Moral: When beaten... THERE IS NO BEATING! If negative people can turn everything into a loss, thinking positive call help you turn anything into victory. I mean Hitler murdered millions right? Arent you happy (Jew or not), that it was not you? VICTORY! (if somehow Pyrrhic depending on how you turn on it... But if you wanna turn a gain to a pain, go ahead...)

roses are red violets are blue i have a knife get in the van

- Did you fall from heaven? - No, I dug my way up from Hell.

Ya know what would look good on you? ME!

The word of the day is legs, Lets go upstairs and spread the word.

-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? -I'm an atheist.

jack sanders

How much does a polar bear weigh? Not as much as my dick.

HI, DO YOU KNOW WHY THEY CALL ME DOCTOR RABBIT THE HYMEN DESTROYER? Nero the clit collector: Actually this works pretty good, just wear a random rabbit costume, cut a hole where your CAWCK is, and make sure they are girls under twelve or below (because it kinda loses its meaning with little boys but fuck it anyways, yeah fuck it! FUCK IT TO THE LIMIT!) I work at a daycare center: Because I care.

Man - "Does this smell like chloroform to you?" Woman - "Yes it does."

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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