-I know you want to ask me out. I am free anytime. -Ok, then go out.

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ur so hot, i'd let u put ur vagina inside of me

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If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put "U" and "I" as far apart as possible.

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Hey bitch wanna fuck! SURE! Nah you too sleasy. Moral: And the masters of the universe.

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He - Nice shoes. She - Thanks. He - But i think they would look better in my pants.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because your accent sounds stupid.

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Hey, I got some of the worst ratings on Horsehead network! Really? Moral: You bet!

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-hey girl, you must be a pirate cause you got a lot of booty

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good thing i got my library card cuz im checking you out. i hate people who have library cards.

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Wanna go back to my place and watch some CarVideos?

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Him: What's it like in Hell? Her: Why are you asking me that? Him: Because you're the devil and I know where the f*ck you came from; I can see you're horny.

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if u were a triangle u'd be an obtuse one fat ass

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He: Did you fall from Heaven? She: Well... He: 'Cos I got an erection. She: -__-

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Don't worry, I love fat birds....why are you crying?

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Hey baby, let me take you to heaven.

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Man: Hey, I've been kinda watching you through the night and I'd really be mad if I didn't talk to you tonight. So um, do you want to grab a bite to eat sometime or something? Woman: I'm married but you seem like a nice guy so yea... yea, I'd like that alot.

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Woman: The church is fantastic, I see Jesus wherever I go! Me: I see a psycho wherever you go. Moral: PSYCHO CRUSHER!

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Do you believe in rape by first sight? Moral: I think its immoral enough as it is already.

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- I'm a weatherman, and I'm predicting 9 inches tonight ;) - Oh? Well weathermen aren't always accurate, so it's probably more like 3 inches.

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven... Because it looks like you landed on your face!

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Dont let this rape turn into a murder

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my love for you is like diarrhea. i can never hold it in

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- Lets get outta here and have some fun - If you got your fathers dick....no

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Man: May I have this dance? Woman: Take it, it's all yours [goes away]

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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