- Hey good looking, where've I seen you before? - I'm one of the nurses at the plastic surgery department. Want another visit?

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Male: It's super hard and long. Female: I have always been under the impression that the GED is relatively simple.

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Did it hurt when you burst through the concrete emerging from hell? Yes, yes it did.

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the roses were red and the violets were nice but if you want to get with me you better up the price

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hey bitch

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A 85 year old man was at a bar, he goes up to the first hot thing he sees and asks do I come here often?

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M: Hey whats up? W: My Dick!

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Did you fall from heaven? Because, I believe in the afterlife.

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Ay girl, those jeans make your ass look fat. Now I'ma get you pregnant while you make breakfast.

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girl:go away! boy:okay girl:i need space boy:okay just one meter girl: no i"m not kidding boy:i know girl:my mother hate's you boy:i hate her too.! girl:we are now break boy:okay i"m hungry lets eat! girl:you don't understand me boy:no i"m understand you girl:you are philosopher i hate you boy:what? girl:nothing at the end of the story they loved each other

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Guy: Hey baby, did you come by car? Girl: No I walked. Guy: Well I can make you come in mine.

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Guy: Girl, I wish you were a car door, cause I'd slam you all night Girl: Well I have a car, how about I run you over with it instead?

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Boy- is that a mirror in your pants? Girl-? Boy-because i see my self in your pants Girl-oh this, this is a picture of crap!

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Hey you've got the most beautiful f*cked up teeth I've ever seen.

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Are you a fart? Because you just blew me away.

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Let's not turn this rape into a murder..

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You don't sweat much for a fat girl, do ya?

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-I think you're the best looking girl in here. -Really? Well, I'd better go find the best looking guy then, hadn't I!

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With the escalating price of rohypnol, most girls aren't worth my attention.

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Walking to your car alone later?

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I wish my sister was as hot as you.

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male- are you from Tenessee female- why? am I the only ten you see? male- no, i was just going to say you look a little inbred.

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Don't turn this rape into a murder.

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Man - Hey you're kinda pretty! Woman - Um thanks... Man - Whoa slow down! I said kinda.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!