- Anti-Pickup Line

You're parents must be assholes because baby you're the shit!

At a bar. M: I so wanna sex you! W: What? :) M: What part of sex did you not get? VAGINA! W: You have problems with your heart? (angina) :( M: Stop screwing with me bitch! W: I dont have no itch... :/ The man gets insulted and leaves Woman: Cute guy, I wish I wasn't nearly deaf though... Moral "patience is a virtue?" Hell no! The guy got laid with 6 women that day so the moral is "The more people listen to what you have to say, the more you will get laid this day, and a deaf woman is a challenge if she aint your way"

"Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven?" "Yes. I ruptured my bowels upon impact."

Female Police officer: Anything you say can and will be held against you. Me: Boobies.

You got some junk in the trunk, can I dump my load in there too?

Roses are red, something something, I am just too desperate to concentrate please let me just put it in you.

Guy - Hey baby, what's your sign? Girl - ?

Her: Are you from China? Because I’m China get your number Him: Tibet you are. But I'm not Russian into anything, sorry.

- if I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together - If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U next to Y, just why

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When a tractor fell on your face?

Do you wanna go halves in a bastard?

In the USA: Man: Hello, I am half Iraq and half Afghanistan, my name is Osama Bin Allah! Girl: Oh... Uh em... I do not mind you nor anything but, you are like uh... civilized and stuff right? Just asking! Man: Of course miss, so how many camels to get into your pussy? Girl: OMG! Man: WAIT YOU MISHEAR ME! I SAY HOW MANY CARAMELS TO GET INTO YOUR... never mind... Moral: Seriously just give up, this must be the worst "pickupline" ever

Male: Get in the van.

Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

Pick up lines from the stone age: Fail. Man: Hello, you look beautiful, I speak very well, and if you allow me to make love with you, I promise I will protect you and raise the child with you :)! Woman: WHAT? A guy without wild chesthair that speaks instead of grunting and yelling? You to sex me and you do not even got a club? I am SOOO gonna go to Grogg instead! He has like the biggest club and knows how to really HIT a woman! Moral: I would say somethings do change, but Id rather be Grogg than the loser above, of course I prefer hitting ON women first, if that does not work I... Oh right, I am married :P

-I love you.

Sickman Fraud: Hmm you look remotely alike my mother... Woman: Uh? Sickman Fraud: Yes fucking you should das probably give me some release, die reason to resist me is not necessary, you envy my pingas and I can assign it to you if you put on this ugly wig and yell "bad boy" whilzt I das fukte das rassenhol... Woman: OMG SICK! Moral: The father of modern psychology? Seriously?! I was going for a bachelor in psychology studies, but its just disgusting.

- Did you fall from heaven? - No, I dug my way up from Hell.

Ya know what would look good on you? ME!

The word of the day is legs, Lets go upstairs and spread the word.

How much does a polar bear weigh? Not as much as my dick.

Man - "Does this smell like chloroform to you?" Woman - "Yes it does."

- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together - U and me - Grammer freak

Hey, Are You From Tennessee, Because Your License Plate Says Tennessee.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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