- Can I have your number? - Sure. Twelve.

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-Did it hurt -What when i fell from heaven? -No when you fell from the ugly tree and hit every single branch on the way down

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The word of the day is 'legs'. Wanna come to my place and spread the word?

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I DROPPED MY LAPTOP IN THE RIVER IT WAS ADELE ROLLING IN THE DEEP ( A DELL ROLLING IN THE DEEP)

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"Hey baby, how do you like your eggs in the morning?" "Unfertilized."

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Superman enters a bar: Superman: Ladies... who wants to try out my newly developed "super orgasmi-power"? Women: Did you not die? Superman: Uh no... it was just a uh... healing coma... *All the women fall into a "healing coma* Superman: *scratches head* Well... I kinda asked for this... Moral:*Healing coma*

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Hey baby, wanna make $50?

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Girl: Go f**k yourself Guy: can you help me?

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- Does this rag smell like ether? - MMMPPPHHRPHRRG!

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- Hey good looking, where've I seen you before? - I'm one of the nurses at the plastic surgery department. Want another visit?

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BOY-i love you GIRL-(sneezes) sorry im allergic to bullshit

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You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear

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Miss excuse me but... Moral: Admitt it fucker, you cant pick up a girl by apolgizing for whatever you are gonna do beforehand. GIMME FIVE! (red thumbs, red is the color of love or something)

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whats your name beautiful? ;) Tony... (silence)

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Man: Do you sleep on your stomach? Woman: No... Man: Can I?

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-What`s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar? -What`s it like being the biggest liar in the world?

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That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, I'd be coming too.

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Male: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Female: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore

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Hey, we have coresponding genetailia, we should converge in sexual intercourse.

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man:hey can you help me look for my dog i lost him in this cheap motel room girl: oh really i didnt know rotten garbage like you actully a had a friend even if it is a pet!

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ur so hot, i'd let u put ur vagina inside of me

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M: Wanna play dynamite? W: what's that? M: I lie on my back and you blow the sh** out of me.

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Your skin would make a nice coat.

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Tonight might be a convienient night for us to have some intercourse.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!