- Anti-Pickup Line

-Do your feet hurt? Because I couldn't help but notice you look about 75 pounds overweight and I hear that is rough on your feet.

Get in the van.

the most beatiful woman I have ever seen, so could you move out the way please

Man: Hi ladies I am back for more if you know what I mean ;) Ladies: Get lost you damn hippie! The seventies are over! Man: Whaaat? I died for your sins you know! Moral: Ever heard of Jesus`s ladyfriends? There, now you see what I mean.

Female: You're hot! Male: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha get in the van.

Him: Did it hurt? Her: What? Him: When you fell out of the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down?

Man: Do you work at Subway? Girl: Why? Did I just give u a 6 inch?

You want to sleep with me and i want to sleep with you. I'm at least half right.

roses are red, violets are blue, my toe hurts.

-can i buy you a drink? i buy you a taxi?

Pick up lines from the stone age: Fail. Man: Hello, you look beautiful, I speak very well, and if you allow me to make love with you, I promise I will protect you and raise the child with you :)! Woman: WHAT? A guy without wild chesthair that speaks instead of grunting and yelling? You to sex me and you do not even got a club? I am SOOO gonna go to Grogg instead! He has like the biggest club and knows how to really HIT a woman! Moral: I would say somethings do change, but Id rather be Grogg than the loser above, of course I prefer hitting ON women first, if that does not work I... Oh right, I am married :P

are u an angle because i have a boner oh what fail

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? nwaaahhh blushing or something Because it looks like you landed on your face.

Girl: Are you a doctor? Because I think I have the flu. sneeze

what goes up and down , side to side all the time? a compass get your mind out of the gudder.

You're parents must be assholes because baby you're the shit!

can i take a dump in your mouth?

I AM FAGNETO! WELCOME TO GAY!

Yeah you got me there dude, you really got my bragging rights... I am here with some "just" (nothing special) friend of my wife, that is wearing me out as she wont get off my Swagger, but while mentioning it like this makes me just as depraved as her... Gotta say, woman pleading me to get jumping on my cock, while my wife makes us breakfast... ...Im done being the king, im a fucking God. Anyway, "Eriksen" (you know who I mean) is pissed at me because I was supposed to be at work, and he apparently spends time here looking for me when he knows I am getting down and... Man this woman needs the cock... I mean at this rate she will bang me to death... ...But what a way to go. But seriously, would I really be at work, and allow you to come get my/now your car from garage whose walls are so paper thin that the police and securitas would be on your ass if I was not at least nearby? (well securitas are lazy, but as a lawyer, I benefit from suing them... Again) There are like eight alarms there, and you so gangsta you would get jailed. UPDATE: Punches, not slaps, remember the guy who punched that sweet chick when he got drunk, and then you punched me down and I got up and broke your jaw? Yeah that shit stings still, Five punches, at any time (no haymakers hey, I know my haymakers/uppercuts) but you take five punches... The fuck am I talking to, whigs is here already... Moral: I wont just write this shit just to make it all disappear with a delete button, fuck, im a super sayan!

What did the priest say to the rabbi? We are both religious figures at the head of our places of worship.

guy: r u from mcdonalds, coz im luvin it :D Girl: r u from burger king coz ur fat :L

-don't sit on the table, people eat there! -don't sit on that chair, people sit there!

-You look like a dream. -Go back to sleep.

The return of everyone`s pimps pimp! Pimp: Amma so cool I can piss on this electric fence no problemo! Pzzzzzzzzz.. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA... Moral: Its better to end a sucky character early, am I right or am I right? Thumb me down if I am right...;) Ps: His name was Tyrese Whiner XD you can read his fantastic anti-joke some pages down or whatever...

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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