A guy asks a girl in the bar if he can buy her a drink she denies saying that alcohol is bad for her legs the guy asks why do they swell? No. they spread.

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Man: Hey you are so pretty I bet you are a hooker! Woman: Uh.. thanks but no.. Man: Damn... I was hoping to get laid tonight...

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How much does a polar bear weigh? On average 1135 lbs.

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I'm jealous of every girl that hugs you, Because for that one second she held my entire world.

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-Your the hottest girl i have ever met -I'm a man

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Guy - Hey baby, what's your sign? Girl - ?

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Do you wanna be a pirate ship? Because there can be tons of seamen inside of you.

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-- Hey, can I have your number? -- 12

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You are almost as beautiful as my mother.

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Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

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If we were confronted, by a vicious man-eating bear with chain-saws for hands and fangs, holding a hammer; than I would sincerley hope you wouldn't be harmed because you're pretty.

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Your clothes are making me uncomfortable, take them off.

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i want a blowjob bitch *lifts her hijab*

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Woman: Hey hot stuff! Are you new around he... Man: Eh, I am not comfortable with women hitting on me, even hot ones like you, its just uh... awkward and... Woman: uh sorry, its not like I was hitting on you nor anything ;), Why dont you hit on me? Man: Uh... I err.. how you... uh... *the guy proceeds to stare at the floor for the next five minutes then runs out crying* Moral: NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERD!

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I thought you were cute, so the voices told me to come say hi.

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will you marry me

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I scream, You scream, The Police come, It's Awkward...

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Let me stick it in...just once baby...that's all I'll need. ;)

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Man: Would you like to dance? Woman: Hell No! Man: I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me. I said - You look fat in those pants!

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-Do your feet hurt? Because I couldn't help but notice you look about 75 pounds overweight and I hear that is rough on your feet.

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You wanna go somewhere? Yeah, where? The Swingers Association.

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Hey baby, can I cream in your chocolate?

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Hey babe, are your parents arseholes? Because your the shit.

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How much do you love me? Look at the stars and count them Bu-but it's afternoon Exactly

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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