The word of the day is 'legs'. Wanna come to my place and spread the word?

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Are you an angel? 'Cause you're the only ten I see.

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guy:do you know how much a polar bear weighs? girl: ..no, how much?? guy:i dunno but probly not as much as you

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Baby, I love every muscle in your body... Especially mine.

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I lost my Nobel prize, can you help me find it?

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-Did it hurt -What when i fell from heaven? -No when you fell from the ugly tree and hit every single branch on the way down

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-What sign were you born under? -No Parking.

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Don't worry, I love fat birds....why are you crying?

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Man: GET IN THE VAN! Woman: NO! Man: Well... How about the Limo? Its got beverages and caviar and... Woman: OOH :D Moral: Always go for the limo first,

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Young Man: Mom.. oh mom I want you so bad! Mom: I want you so bad too son! (starts ripping of clothes) Young Man: Uh... I want you to make me a sandwich... what is going on? Mom: Uh... never mind... Next day: Mom: Hey I bought you some cartoons... Young Man: Huh? I am too old for carto... HEY! :D what is this? What is this Hentai stuff? OOH! Moral: Hentai, the reason asians are smart and families stick together in Japan... sometimes they literally stick together...

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By reason or by Strength, moral man has a serious side too, and I prevail. Moral: Threats... anyone in my unit threatening another would simply be thrown in jail for a couple of weeks, then kicked out, and using military equipment to threaten, trace and murder people is highly illegal. Asshole, troll or not, I will use my right and reason to have you removed permanently from the horsehead network if you persist.

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Knock Knock... Who's there Want Want who Want who fuck

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So, I hear you want to rape Nathan Skye's body.

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Hey girl, ever tried a double dildo with a man before? ;)

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I think I shit myself

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If I had chloroform and a rag, you'd be waking up in a closet tomorrow.

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Losers pick-up sex guide. 1. Create a beautiful environment at home, with candles, romantic music, etc. 2. Buy lube, some sexy female underwear, a couple of sex toys, some erotic magazines to excite you`re partner. 3. Pick-up you`re stuff and masturbate.

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You're a bit heavier but i think I can fit you in a barrel.

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How do you know where gonna have sex tonight.Im stronger than you.

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Ay Girl. Can I get yo digletts?

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Tenth year anniversary female edition: Love, for each day my love grows stronger for you. Too bad honey, I married a old man and was hoping you would be dead by now. Oh! What a shock! Do you really mean that? Sigh... No, whispers: I was just hoping that would give you a stroke that's all) What was that last thing you said? Nothing "dear" Moral: Cyanide, just mash the seeds of six apples, use a syringe and presto! Dead family!

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- I'd go through anything for you. - Good! Let's start with your bank account.

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can i take a dump in your mouth?

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Guy: I lost my phone number, Can I have yours? Girl: Your phone service would help you get a new one.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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