- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Hey baby, can I cream in your chocolate?

With the escalating price of rohypnol, most girls aren't worth my attention.

If you were a booger, I'd pick you first.

Are you a Potato? Because I love Potatoes.

Hello my name is Horny and... oops... I got it wrong didn't I?

If you were a booger, that'd be pretty nasty.

Hello little girl would you like some candy, yes? ;-)

What did you do to Kelly? Why? Because she said you did her good(; What? Cuz' I heard you did that goood thing(; When? Last night on the bed, 3am(;

Your hair is really beautiful. Thanks. Can I make a wig out of it?

Hey chicks! I am a very experienced suicide bomber, I was even in the plane that blew up the world trade center A ;) ¨ Moral: This must be the worst pickupline ever for oh so many reasons on so many levels...

- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put I and U together. - Would you also change it so that I is an object, therefore making your previous sentence grammatically correct? And besides, I already organized the alphabet so that N and O are right next to each other.

-hey girl, you must be a pirate cause you got a lot of booty

Are those space pants? Because no one is going to hear you scream later.

I wish my sister was as hot as you.

How does a ghost walk through walls? There's normally a door.

Guy: Theres this girl and Ive been meaning to ask her something... Girl: I bet I know who it is ;D Guy: Oh good. So is your mom available on Friday?

M: Wanna play dynamite? W: what's that? M: I lie on my back and you blow the sh** out of me.

whats up ho

-Hey babe, wanna go to my place and bang all night long? -No you freak. -Well, I gave you a choice.

If we were confronted, by a vicious man-eating bear with chain-saws for hands and fangs, holding a hammer; than I would sincerley hope you wouldn't be harmed because you're pretty.

hey bitch

Girl, you must have fallen from heaven...because you're dead.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book