What happens if an Internet troll has a heart attack Doesn't matter nobody will care

You're a bit heavier but i think I can fit you in a barrel.

(this is only funny if ur a guy!) you go to a party im a man you get a drink im a man you laugh with friends im a man u see a hot chick im a man you invite her over to ur place im a man you go up in the bedroom im a man you go to pull her pants off im a man and she says... im a man!

Me noob days the triology... Or something like that. Girl: So you looking for company or sex or something? Me: Something like that. Girl: Cool because you see my friend over there, he is gay too and...*breaking bad Doc tells Walter he has cancer sound* Last time I painted my nails black just because IT LOOKED FUCKING AWESOME OKAY!

-hey baby wanna get a drink? -no but i wanna get the heck away from you

What did the blond do when the web page she was visiting didn't load? She checked if her wireless access had been somehow cut off and then hit the refresh button and waited for the page to load again.

if i see you naked i'll die happy Well if i see you naked i'l die instandly

the roses were red and the violets were nice but if you want to get with me you better up the price

-Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots? -Sorry, I don't date outside my species.

My penis just died. Can I bury it in your ass?

-Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I'd be in prison.

You are so beautiful. You look just like my dead wife. You can come back to my place and the 3 of us can get to know each other better.

MALE: We can do this the easy way or the hard way. FEMALE: Excuse me? MALE: Hard way it is *zip* FEMALE: *gurgle gurgle* *scream*

-Your really nice plus i like girls with flat asses

GIRL: I bet you say that to all the girls you meet. MAN: How much you want to bet? No wait, I better not make that bet. (or) MAN: Only half the ones I get this far in conversation with. The other half are a little bit easier to get in bed with.

M: What's your name? W: Jenny. M: What's your number? W: eight-six-seven-five-three-oh-ni-yie-yen

-So, what are you doing later? -Not you.

- I would love to get into your pants... - You can't: I have an asshole in there already.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was born beautiful, But what the hell happened to you!

-I know you want to ask me out. I am free anytime. -Ok, then go out.

wanna go halves on a b*stard?

Guy:I invented troll face oh yea! Girl:you gave my daughter nightmares for weeks you b****!(throws drink in face)

He - Nice shoes. She - Thanks. He - But i think they would look better in my pants.

Gurl, I'll do you like I do my homework. Slam you on the table and do you all night long!

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!