Guy: Did you use Windex on your pants? Girl: No, why? Guy: Because I see myself in your pants.

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Hey giiiiiiiiiiirl, I'm no Flinstone but I can make your bedrock.

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boy: hey wanna hang out some time?! girl: O MY GOD! r u hannah montanna?!

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if i see you naked i'll die happy Well if i see you naked i'l die instandly

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Do you believe in love at first sight or do I need to beat you again?

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GIRL: I bet you say that to all the girls you meet. MAN: How much you want to bet? No wait, I better not make that bet. (or) MAN: Only half the ones I get this far in conversation with. The other half are a little bit easier to get in bed with.

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male-"Do you have a rape fetish?" fenale-"No, i don't" male-"Ohh... Well you're not going enjoy this."

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And then one day God invented man, the worlds third most useless invention. Moral: I cant stop laughing, thank you everybody I actually got top grades in sociology studies for this moral man crap XD

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Hey babe, if you were a Pokemon, I'd choose you. Oh really? Because if you were a pokemon, I'd fight you, win and not even bother to capture you.

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Did it hurt when you burst through the concrete emerging from hell? Yes, yes it did.

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Guy:I invented troll face oh yea! Girl:you gave my daughter nightmares for weeks you b****!(throws drink in face)

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Hi girls... whos coming home with me? And please dont reject me because I am a rich man and rejection makes me throw thousand dollar bills at random.

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You know how I know we're going to have sex, tonight? I'm bigger than you.

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Hey baby, you make me wanna get a job.

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Guy : Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Girl : No, why? Guy : Because I can totally see myself in your pants!

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- Hey, what do you do for a living? - Female impersonator

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- Can I have your number? - Sure. Twelve.

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I take the the out of psychotherapist

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Skilled man enters a bar: Man: Lady, I am a scientist... Lady: So? Man: I also have black belt in several martial arts... Lady: Your point? Man: uh... I have uh... Lady: Sigh... *gets up and leaves* Moral: Knowing what and how to be attractive to women is an art on its own...

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"Hey baby, how do you like your eggs in the morning?" "Unfertilized."

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What happens if an Internet troll has a heart attack Doesn't matter nobody will care

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Girl: I was just wondering... Boy: Smell my armpits on July 24th, 2016!

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He: You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She: You are so handsome when you keep your mouth shut.

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Male: are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. Female: no, I'm from Idaho. Because I da ho.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!