Real life again: I was about sixteen: Girl: Hey I hear you are good at tekken tag! Me: Yeah, but I dont play videogames anymore (a lie in order to appear "cooler") Girl: I am pretty good too! I love Kuma and Panda Me: Well, okay... Girl: Want to play with me? Me: Meh... Girl: But I really want to play with you if you know what I mean ;) Me: I dont play tekken... Girl: Not even... "Tekken" ;) ;) Me: Nah... Moral: I am a late bloomer to say the least...

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showing people this http://hahgay.com/ p.s after seeng any girls want to come back to my place

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-ILY -Aw. Spell it out it will make it more special. -I'm Leaving You

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-What's your favorite color? -bl... -mine too! Let's f***

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The invention that gets me around 20 red thumbs averge. Moral: <<<<< Thiz. Its better tto be infamous, than forgotten.

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free candy....

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"Hey did I not meet you at the singles and desperates club?"

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-Does beauty run in your family? -It obviously doesn't in yours!

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After hearing a pickup line: -I like your approach, now let's see your departure.

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so... you're a girl,huh?

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-You know I've always had a thing for blondes -thats funny, i've always had a thing for girls

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you're a fucking hillbilly.

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Hey, Are You From Tennessee, Because Your License Plate Says Tennessee.

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-wow I could just drown in the ocean of your eyes -well why don't you -well I'll steal your sisters number, get lost at sea, and shipreck in her bed Then you can come and save us when she is shouting S.O.S out of the other room

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Hey, are you from Tennessee? Because you look like you are from Tennessee.

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Man: May I please sit next to you for a brief moment? Woman: Sure :), you`re such a gentleman :). Man: Would you care for a bit of violent rapage in you`re anus?

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Is there a mirror in your pocket?... Because if so, you should probably take it out and, uh, fix what you have going on there.

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Women love it when you kiss their neck. Just not while they are driving and while you're in the back seat and when they don't know you...

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can i take a dump in your mouth?

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-As I slipped my finger in her hole I could feel her getting wetter and wetter, When I pulled it out she was going down on me. I should probably start looking for a new boat...

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Hey baby, let me take you to heaven.

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Dont people ever get tired of PRETENDING like they dont need others aproval? I NEED APPROVAL I NEED APPROVAL! Moral: I REALLY DO! YEEEEEEEEES BECAUSE...Uh...you matter more than me? Nah, nothing like that, only I matter more than you...

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girl, are you a christian? Sure... Do you believe in me? I dont even know you! Well, met God? No? You love him!

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Do you believe in rape by first sight? Moral: I think its immoral enough as it is already.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!