You're place or mine? Both, you go to yours and I go to mine.

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M: On a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight? F: North Korea

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Her: Are you from China? Because I’m China get your number Him: Tibet you are. But I'm not Russian into anything, sorry.

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Male: Baby, I am God's gift to this earth! Female: Well, if I take a receipt up to Heaven, can I exchange you for someone better?

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- Hello There Pretty Lady! - Hi... - Wow, your the fist girl I've met who has bigger boobs than I do! - Tw*t

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Guy: Have you ever been to Thailand? Girl: No Guy: Well maybe I should take you to Bangkok

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showing people this http://hahgay.com/ p.s after seeng any girls want to come back to my place

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You seem reasonably clean, which is always an important consideration for me when selecting a woman.

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Hey girl, ever tried a double dildo with a man before? ;)

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Man: "Did you fall from heaven? 'Cause it looks like you landed on your face"

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Did the lord take the thunder from the skies, and put it in your thighs?

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damn, girl... you look like you put your socks on BOTH feet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -To get to the other side.

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Nice legs what time do they open

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Guy: Have you ever been surfing? Girl: No; Yes Guy: Wanna surf in my jizz?

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In the USA: Man: Hello, I am half Iraq and half Afghanistan, my name is Osama Bin Allah! Girl: Oh... Uh em... I do not mind you nor anything but, you are like uh... civilized and stuff right? Just asking! Man: Of course miss, so how many camels to get into your pussy? Girl: OMG! Man: WAIT YOU MISHEAR ME! I SAY HOW MANY CARAMELS TO GET INTO YOUR... never mind... Moral: USA discovers they do not have nuclear weapons and then gives them nuclear reactors?

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Hello im a thief and I'm here to steal your purse

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Flipping a coin to give you my number or not to give you my number

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Do you have Groupon? *wait for response* Because you look fucking cheap

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Ever kissed a bunny inbetween the ears? Nope. I'm allergic to them.

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I like my women like I like my coffee I drink Tea

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Hey girl, want to meet the guy with the largest dick in town ;)? Wow yeah sure! Yeah that would be like cool rite? Moral: The biggest? *looks down pants* Meh!

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did it hurt ? did what hurt? when your fell from heaven? because it looks like you landed on your face :O

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Your skin would make a nice coat.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!