-Your really nice plus i like girls with flat asses

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nice kid... want another?

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Golf.

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I couldn't help but notice you from the other side of the bar. You look way better from over there.

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How'd you like to earn 14 dollars, the HARD way?

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hey bitch

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Girl, you must have fallen from heaven...because you're dead.

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hey i know spanish french german russian and Punjabi. got a talented tongue ;)

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Man: Yeah I have done it with thousands of women all around the world... THOUSANDS! Woman: Okay... then ill come home with you, I want an experienced man to be my first... At his house: Woman: I AM SCARED! Will it hurt? Its my first time and... Man: I dunno! I am scared as Its my first time too! :( Moral: A man whose is scared of sex... pfffffff!

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I'm desperate, you'll do.

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Lets play the Yes/No game the rules are you can only say yes or no once to the questions, No. 1 Are you beautiful?, No.2 Are you Lying?

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Man: How much does a polar bear weight? Girl: No idea... Man: Me either... By the way! Did you hear of the great blahblahblahblah that did blahalblahblah! Moral: Breaking the ice... easier than it seems...

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"Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven?" "Yes. I ruptured my bowels upon impact."

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knock knock. whos there. interupting cow. inter... mooo!

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On your mark, get set, suck my dick.

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Hey babe, take a walk on the wild side. (;

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him: why are you so gorgeous? her: i dont know i guess my parents had some really good sex.

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who wants to play EPAR

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I might not be the best looking guy here but im the only one talking to you

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He: I know all 21 letters of the Alphabet She: Isn't there 26?? He: Oh yeah...i keep forgetting URAQT

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Hey baby, are you Star Trek? Because I watch you every night in the darkness.

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Are your parents retarded? Because you sure are special.

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- I want to give myself to you. - Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.

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Man: Wanna hear a joke about my C*ck, nevermind, it's too long Woman: Wanna hear a joke about my P*ssy, oh wait you'll never get it

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!