Nice Shirt. It would look better on my bedroom floor.

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Is it hot in here or are you just suffocating me in this relationship

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Dude: Did you fart? Girl: No Dude: Oh I'm sorry because you blew me away

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whats up ho

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Are you a Potato? Because I love Potatoes.

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Female: You're hot! Male: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha get in the van.

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Are you from tennessee? Because your inbred and retarted.

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I may have never f*cked a 10 before, but I did f*ck five 2's.

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Do you wanna go halves in a bastard?

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-You wanna get laid tonight? -You wanna never have sex again?

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man: may I impale you on my stake? woman: O.o (for goth girls)

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Im tired of fapping... wanna help me get some variation?

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so how long have you been a bald ghost wombat?

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- Do you wanna play the rape game? - NO! - That's the spirit!

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Hey did you fall from Heaven? Cos I think you are angel. If I'd fallen from anywhere that high I'd be in hospital with serious injuries or dead. Do the logic.

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You're so hot that if someone threw a grenade at you, I'd probably throw it back because falling on it sounds like a really dumb idea.

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Are you a fart? Because you just blew me away.

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So I caught my sister masturbating the other day, it was like lol hahaha you filthy bitch! Then she was like DONT TELL ANYBODY PLEASE I WILL BUY YOU THOSE BOXING GLOVES YOU WANTED SO MUCH! PLEASE! And I was like, NUHUUUH! The bed is full of piss and I totally got this on my cellphone, so you gonna pull up your panti... Oh you still looking for them LOL! Yeah, that was the subject I brought up at a bar... Sober, unless Redbull counts as drunk... Anti Pickupline as FUCK! Players Dont Use RedBull -Richard Nixon or whatever.

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"Do you have a map? I'm getting lost in your eyes." "They always say that before they go to sleep."

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Roses are red violets are blue i got a gun get in the van!

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He- You've got something on your ass. She- What? He- Oh never mind, it's just a period stain.

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Wow! You know, your eyes are like blueberries, wait, can I actually, can I actually, I'm kinda hungry, can I, can I have them?

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If you were on a shelf at build a bear workshop ....... I would stuff you , except it wouldn't be with cotton

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Hey you must be Jabba the slut from Starwars... why are you crying? Moral: Moral is half the battle

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!