if you were my sister i'd totally get with you.

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And then one day God invented man, the worlds third most useless invention. Moral: I cant stop laughing, thank you everybody I actually got top grades in sociology studies for this moral man crap XD

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Yet another one from real life: At law school: Kid to woman: Why don't I ever get any of you?! *Woman laughs* Me: You could start by not whining so much... Kid: That wont ever work! You know that is bullshit! Its not like I am whining I just whine whenever blahblahblah... Me: Sigh... Girl: He is kinda cute... Me: Wha? Moral: Not a real anti joke, since I had not heard from any of them until today, I just got invited to their wedding...

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You look just like my sister! That's funny,... CUZ IM A DUDE

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What do you do for a living?" "I'm a professional athlete." "Oh really? What sport do you play?" "Golf.

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Boy: whats your name? Girl: i dont know, im just s fetus

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Tonight might be a convienient night for us to have some intercourse.

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You look... clean

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Grapist: I bet you like getting Graped, tied up and beaten muahahahahaha! I am so gonna do the worst things to you! Woman: YES PLEASE! Man: MAAAAAAAAAAAN your not fun anymore... Moral: Its not grape if she wants it... and I guess grapists dont like that... remember that girls whenever someone is gonna rape you just say YES unless they yell surprise though... then its surprise sex.

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As a man I am afforded greater opportunity then my equally qualified female counterparts. I have made it a life goal use this opportunities for greater good.

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J.B: You smile, I smile. Girl: I wasn't smiling...

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-Did you fall from heaven? Because your an angel -No but did you? Because your face is fucked up!

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- I want to give myself to you. - Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.

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Are you from tennessee? Cuz it looks like your missing some teeth.

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guy:did you fall from heaven? girl:no? guy:sorry, it just looks like you landed on your face

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I just shat my pants..... can I get in yours?

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- Does this rag smell like ether? - MMMPPPHHRPHRRG!

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Are you from tennessee? Because your inbred and retarted.

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause the ground around you looks like it's cracked.

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Girl: If you was a rollercoaster...I'd ride you all day long.. Guy: What? Am I not big enough for you now...why can't you just be happy with me... =_= Girl: : / I was tring to be all sexy in a cute way... Guy: Pfft. FREAK... e_e

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Sexual harassment, it can be a touchy subject.

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-My love for you is like diarrhea, I cant hold it in...

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Hey, we have coresponding genetailia, we should converge in sexual intercourse.

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M: If life had Alt + F4, I would close your clothes. F: Really? I would close YOU down!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!