Ay girl, those jeans make your ass look fat. Now I'ma get you pregnant while you make breakfast.

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Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

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WOW MY LONGEST EVER COMMENT BELOW GOT A THUMBS UPS WOOT-WO-WO-WOROWOOOT *Partyravelights that confetti crap and... Moral: I dont really give a shit and all...

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You're like a drug to me. why because I'm so addicting?:) No, because you ruined my life.

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Male- You have 206 bones in your body, You want another ?

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*Girl walks into restaurant* - Hi, are you sap666 from the dating site? - I'm going to kill your family! Since then, socially awkward penguin never dated anymore....

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I love every bone in your body, especially mine.

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*on Halloween* Male: My name's Dick, and you're a very pretty PUSSY-cat. Female: I'll cut off your penis.

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the most beatiful woman I have ever seen, so could you move out the way please

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girl:go away! boy:okay girl:i need space boy:okay just one meter girl: no i"m not kidding boy:i know girl:my mother hate's you boy:i hate her too.! girl:we are now break boy:okay i"m hungry lets eat! girl:you don't understand me boy:no i"m understand you girl:you are philosopher i hate you boy:what? girl:nothing at the end of the story they loved each other

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Are you a beaver? Because your overbite seems to be made for my wood. Moral: Take what you see, improve it, and steal the glory... We all do it... maybe not as obvious as this... but judging me badly would be hypocrisy...

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- Yo baby can I have your number? - Sure! My number is one *sticks up middle finger*

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause you d*** sure look like a demon!

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-You smell nice Thanks....... -Have you ever thought of turning your sweat into perfume?

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Me noob days again: She: So, you like it here sweetheart? Me: Excuse me, why the hell are you rubbing my leg? She: Would you prefer I rub something else? Me: What the hell am I doing here anyways Duh! Then I sober up at home... And ran towards the shower, its really not that easy to drown yourself to death in a shower is it?

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M - If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. F - Yeah, it's too bad that N and O are already together.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and G and L and Y together because that is what you are.

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-Hey baby wanna paint the whole town red? -Yeah, with your blood

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This doesn't have to be a rape.

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Male: Did it hurt??? Female: What, when I fell from heaven? Male: No, the first time you did anal!!!

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Guy: Thanks Girl: Why? Guy: Cuz you made me get rid of that boner

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Famous male actors guide on pick-up. 1. Enter Disco. 2. Say hello out loud. 3. By this point you`re screwed... literally.

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I walked into the pub last night with a date and said to the barman, "I'll have a pint of Guinness." My date immediately looked at me and said, "Aren't you forgetting something?" "Of course, how rude of me." I said, "I'll have a pint of Guinness PLEASE."

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knock knock. whos there. interupting cow. inter... mooo!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!