showing people this http://hahgay.com/ p.s after seeng any girls want to come back to my place

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Yo imma let you finish yourself off

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My wife asked me to pass her the lip balm but I accidentally gave her the glue stick, she is still not talking to me.

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Does this rag smell like chloroform?

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Roses are red Violets are gold Get on your knees And do what your told

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Man, stay alive, I dont even got time to read that shit. See you around son.

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Me: Hey lady, you are so fucking hot I want to... Lady: FUCK ME PLEASE ME SO HORNY! Moral: One can always dream... *yawn* Zzzzzzzmooth...

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And then it hit me...no really now I'm bleeding

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- I can make your bed rock. - Oh yeah? An earthquake can too..

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Grapist: I bet you like getting Graped, tied up and beaten muahahahahaha! I am so gonna do the worst things to you! Woman: YES PLEASE! Man: MAAAAAAAAAAAN your not fun anymore... Moral: Its not grape if she wants it... and I guess grapists dont like that... remember that girls whenever someone is gonna rape you just say YES unless they yell surprise though... then its surprise sex.

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In a classy bar: KEEP IT CLASSY! Man: Hello there dear... your eyes sparkle like the sun itself... Woman: Oh... thank you random stranger, that is the most beautiful thing someone have ever said to me :D Man: Really? But you are gorgeous (the two proceed to have a long CLASSY conversation and laughing in a classy reserved matter and drinking classy champagne and whatever... and then: Man: Ahahaha yes that is indeed true... By the way... would you mind becoming the single lonely mother of my children? Moral: skipped most of school classes... class ... overrated...

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-"Hey babe, you gotta nice ass!" -"Yep, and it doesn't like a rude one staring at it."

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Hey gurl, you smell like tape!

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Hey baby, you like sea food? Because I've got crabs!

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Boy : Gurle: hi

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"Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"

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Do you have sunburn, or are you always this hot? It's sunburn.

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Man: Hey I am the hunk that writes the stories with morals, and I thumb them up myself... since they mostly get thumbed down slower that way... Ladies: REALLY! WOW WE NEVER THOUGHT WE WOULD MEET A CELEBRITY! LETS HAVE AN ORGY! Man: HEY! LADIES WAIT WAIT! ONLY 8 AT THE TIME! HELP I AM GETTING GRAPED!... Anyway who am I kidding please proceed but stop fighting over the joystick I have enough joy to all thanks to my writing progress!¨ Moral: His-tory AKa My-Story, and you know that they say that the winners are the one to write history ;), and if you do not know what I mean, you are probable banging me too right now... (true story)

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Gurl, I'll do you like I do my homework. Slam you on the table and do you all night long!

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-Get in the Van

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Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

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Are you doing push-ups with your knees down? Cuz im not sure if this is working out.

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Hi, since its our first "Set Time Date" , I want you know I haven't got any STD's

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—do you believe in love at first sight or shall I come back again? —no, and I think you shall not come back ever.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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