- Have we met? - Honey, we're not meeting now.

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Your butt is so big that I would propably lose intrest during sex.

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GET IN THE VAN!!!

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Hey you should let me have sex with you! Why? Because I'm going to do it anyway!

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Give me everything tonight, or you might not see tomorrow. RAPIST!

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Do you know karate? Because I'd like to kick you in the face.

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Good news: you'll never-ever-ever have a zit again. Bad news: because there's no more space for it to pop out.

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Monday went by and he didn't see her Tuesday was the same Wednesday came and the swelling had finally gone down for him to make his wife out

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- Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason - Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!

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You are so beautiful. You look just like my dead wife. You can come back to my place and the 3 of us can get to know each other better.

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Close you`re eyes and open you`re mouth. *unzips pants*

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Don't worry, I love fat birds....why are you crying?

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Your skin would make a nice coat.

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Hey baby, you like sea food? Because I've got crabs!

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guy scientist: hey can i send a probe to explore uranus? girl scientist: hey can i send a rocket with you in it to the sun/

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I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium were going out and I was like O Mg.

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Young man: Hey I have watched a lot of Hentai lately so I wondered if you wanna come home and have hardcore sex and... Mature woman: HOW CAN YOU SAY SUCH A THING! IM YOUR MOTHER! Young man: As I said mom... I have watched a lot of Hentai lately so... Moral: Hentai keeping families together since forever...

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cockface

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free candy....

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Lady: Is your name REAAAAAAAAALLY Moral? Moral: Stupid big titted bimbo... seems im getting laid tonight...just like I was today, and by midday and... yeah lie.. I mean brag a lot I do not have sex THAT many times a day... okay I lied again... Anyway vote me for president at least I am honest... well actually that was a lie but...

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Did you just fart? Cause it smells like shit in here

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Male: I would die for you... Female: Prove it

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-Wanna go to my place? -Actually, I was gonna ask you the same question. -Really? Where do you live? -In a sexual harassment class.

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-Hi miss are you a ketchup? -hey is this some corny pick-up line?,,,okay fine. why? -because I want to dip my hot dog to you

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!