Man: Hey lady, wanna come home with me? Woman: A man like you :D would ask a woman like me? I... I cannot believe it... sniff... excuse me this is so beautiful... ;D I want to of course of course I want to... Man: Want to? Woman: Tell you to go screw yourself moron! Man: But you said beautiful as you looked into my eyes and seemed so happy... Woman: Yes I was looking at my reflection in your eyes to avoid having to look at your disgustingly ugly face! REJECTED like a SONIC BOOM! (now that one was for the non lesb... I mean non drunk women, see? I am quite equal, even to the weaker, yet hot gender)

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Girl! you are almost as awesome as horsehead network! Moral: I got balls of steel!

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I have a gun.

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Hey wanna smash pissers?

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Roses are red violets are blue this isn't a poem I'm a botanist.

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guy:did you fall from heaven? girl:no? guy:sorry, it just looks like you landed on your face

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-Do you come here often? -I'm about to.

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Are you a Potato? Because I love Potatoes.

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Sorry, I don't wanna date a guy who's best pickup line is cocaine.

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Are you a speeding, aggressive driver? Because your running straight up my ass

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Knock Knock... Who's there Want Want who Want who fuck

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- Is it hot in here, or is it just the broken A/C unit?

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Dating post: "Nice male looking for female company, I have a steady job and would prefer if you too had a job, you will be particularity happy if you have a small penis fetish. Signed BIGPENIS19INCHESJIMlight sleeper

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Male - Hey girl, do you want to dance? Female - No. Male - C'mon, lower your standards a little....I did.

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together - U and me - Grammer freak

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- Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven? - Nah, angels like me, have wings.

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HELLO I AM BORAT! MISHIMUSH! I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE THE MOVIE OF MAKING THE RAPE OF THE AMERICAN WOMAN! WILL YOU HELP US? Woman: NO!!!!!! Oh... ok Mishimush! We make the other Movie then, BORAT THE CRUSHINGS OF AMERICA.

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He: did it hurt? She: when i fell from heaven? He: no. when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. go put some clothes on.

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do you work at subway? 'cause you give me foot long. i'll do you a favour and cut it up

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Man: Dayuuuum *slaps ass* Woman: I just took a shit in my pants and you smacked it.

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girl:go away! boy:okay girl:i need space boy:okay just one meter girl: no i"m not kidding boy:i know girl:my mother hate's you boy:i hate her too.! girl:we are now break boy:okay i"m hungry lets eat! girl:you don't understand me boy:no i"m understand you girl:you are philosopher i hate you boy:what? girl:nothing at the end of the story they loved each other

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Order Online Nightwear and short shop online in India

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I lost my Nobel prize, can you help me find it?

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Let's not turn this rape... into a murder

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!