- Anti-Pickup Line

Boy- I'm heading back to my place. Want to come? Girl-Sorry you strike me as a person who cums all by himself.

Guy: Hey baby, you must be a general, because you're making my PRIVATES stand at attention! Girl: Hmm..they're still a MAJOR disappointment.

ur so hot, i'd let u put ur vagina inside of me

Gaywatch starts

showing people this http://hahgay.com/ p.s after seeng any girls want to come back to my place

-Hey, baby, What's your sign? -Stop.

good thing i got my library card cuz im checking you out. i hate people who have library cards.

"OMG A SAMSUNG!" Lol, thats cool man, as for the car, the engine is shiny and flawless, (you know for a fiat) and I have not used it since I you know "bought it" as in won it from my ex while playing poker? Id give it back to her if she was not such a bitch. Honestly dude, its a fiat, and that piece of shit you call a car, I mean man, we have been towed from the free way like six times already? XD And that is just the few times I want to sit in that piece of shit XD I mean the seats pop off and there is "custom space to transport marijuana there man XD" I seriously hope you bought it that way, because stoners aint my friends. Seriously dude, the Fiat (aka "car") is yours, you know that you are bankrupt because you keep trying to fix that piece of shit on wheels of yours XD, and hey, surprise kiddo, I renewed the engine, so its new and shiny, and free, and fuck if not only the engine itself is worth ten more times than... A billion of those pieces of shit you drive XD No seriously, you know me, Im The Hannibal, I am the beast but I like it classy, and its pretty embarrassing sitting on that piece of shit you call for a car. I know we are from different worlds pal, but take it, just gave myself a bonus at work (legal of course) but I got to say it... "A SAMSUNG OMG" XD And yeah, I know you been eyeballing that "car" aka Fiat, its yours whenever you want it, just tell people I am leasing it to you (I mean it I really do, thats my only condition) Moral: "I DRIVE PIECES OF SHIT FOR BREAKFAST!" PROTIP FOR GETTING ANYWHERE IN YOUR CAR: Put it The opposite way, and have the towing car tow you TOWARDS the place you want to get to XD (hey, how many times you been towed JUST from the freeway? I mean I hate hunting, but do you really use that shit in the Forrest too? Answer here, be real, and come get your car.

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When a tractor fell on your face?

Drink this!

Hey wanna smash pissers?

(Based on a few real life experiences) Man: Hey girl wanna hang out an.. Girl: OMG IMMA ORGASMIN YES I COME WIT YOU AND WE HAVE WILD SAX IN MAH DERTY PUSSY AND THEN YOU LIKK MY ASS GOOD AND CLEEN! Man: Uh... I think I left my wallet im my pocket... which I think is in my fridge.. at home... gotta go before the house burns down you know... "runs off"

Glass Basketball

Can you leave your door unlocked and your underwear drawer open when you go to work?

Every kiss begins with K. Except for ugly, that begins with U.

You're so hot that if someone threw a grenade at you, I'd probably throw it back becausemfalling on it sounds like a really dumb idea.

He: If i were a carpenter i would nail you She: If i were a hammer i would hit you

Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

Man: Wow you are my cousin? Damn girl you are hot! I mean nothing wrong you know, I was just wondering if you wanna get a innocent cup of coffee Woman: Uh, thanks, but I have never met you... Man: Not my cousin? Bah, what a turnoff im outta here... Moral: Yeah moral... Pffft! You will have an easier time finding Waldo here.

Hello I am a violent rapist, oh wait I meant to say my name first and the other much later... Moral: its official you suck!

Female: Hey do you wanna buy me a drink? Male: I really don't like your face.

As long as I have a face, you will always have a place to sit.

-My girlfriend and I want different things out of our relationship. -She wants marriage, children and a house. -I just want out.

- I'm a weatherman, and I'm predicting 9 inches tonight ;) - Oh? Well weathermen aren't always accurate, so it's probably more like 3 inches.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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