Hey you must be Jabba the slut from Starwars... why are you crying? Moral: Moral is half the battle

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I wouldn't.

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Dont blame me for using moral all the time its just part of my sig...nature XD Moral: Not a pick up line, so its pretty anti.

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Ever kissed a bunny inbetween the ears? Nope. I'm allergic to them.

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A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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Boy: can i have your number? Jewish girl *pulls up sleeve*

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Are you Jamaican? Because I love black women

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Hi I'm Shaniqua.

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-Why is one breast bigger than the other? -because I popped it and all the silicone leaked out

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Nice Shirt. It would look better on my bedroom floor.

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A polar bear and a penguin were taking a bath. The polar bear asked the penguin to pass the soap. the penguin responded by saying,"What do i look like a microwave?"

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Man: If I ask you to go on a date, would the answer to that question be the same as the answer to this one? Woman: (pause) Rape!

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- Your place or mine? - Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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Girl, do you believe in love by first sight? Uh maybe... Okay, let me see if those titties of you are real or wonderbra or silicone or whatever... Moral: You are fantastic, you know who you remind me of? Myself ;)

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Is that a keg in your pants? Cause I'd like to tap that ass.

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- If you were a booger I'd pick you first - If you were a booger I'd throw you away...

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-Can I get your Number? -29435566 (see if you can get it.)

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-hey, come here a minute.

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you know what rhymes with hug me LET'S HAVE SEX

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *sigh* Did what hurt? (Expecting him to say "When you fell from heaven") Boy: When you broke through the earths crust, ascending from hell.

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Roses are red, something something, I am just too desperate to concentrate please let me just put it in you.

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Dude: I don't wanna be friends anymore! Dudette: I take it that you found out about my feelings. Dude: Yes. And, at the rate this is going, staying where we are now gets us nowhere. Dudette: *sparkly eyes* So... you mean... Dude: Yes. We are more than friends. I realize that you have realized that. In fact... *steps to whisper in her ear* ... we're like BROTHERS. Dudette: 3

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!