Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Guy: When you ascended from the depths of hell and broke through the earth's crust?

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-You're fat! -No I'm not. -You will be, when my dick is in you

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Did the lord take the thunder from the skies, and put it in your thighs?

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GUY- Are you from heaven.....cuz it sure as hell doesn't look like it.

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—do you believe in love at first sight or shall I come back again? —no, and I think you shall not come back ever.

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-Excuse me do you know how much a polar bear weighs? -Enough to break the ice? -Ummm... yea... *silence*

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Guy: What does a girl like you doing to a place like this? Girl: Trying to get away from you

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I have been known to give women the best fake orgasms ever ;)

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"I lost my virginity! Can I have yours?"

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Do you work at Subway? Cuz you just gave me a footlong

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Does this rag smell like chloroform?

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Boy: did it hurt when you fell from heaven Girl: I'm a antsiest

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"You look like Carmen Electra's deformed, burned, dismembered sister..."

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Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

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-You know I've always had a thing for blondes -thats funny, i've always had a thing for girls

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put "your sister" and "I" together.

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I might not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you

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I would take a bullet for you. In COD. JK THAT WOULD RUIN MY KILLSTREAKS

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-You smell nice Thanks....... -Have you ever thought of turning your sweat into perfume?

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(Guy mumbles a bit, then says): You don't know me, but can I get you a drink? Yeah, sure... OK. HAHAHAA!!! Before I asked if you wanted a drink I mumbled "Do you want to have sex"? And you said yes! HAHAHAA!!!

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Sex?

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Your body would look good in my trunk.

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A man comes home from his doctor and tells his wife that he only has 12 hours to live so he asks his wife later that night if they can do it one last time she agrees but after an hour the man wakes his wife and says honey in a few hours I will be dead can we do it again please. So they do it again a few hours later the man wakes his wife again and says dearest since I'm going to die soon can we please? to this the wife says look honey tomorrow I have to get up you don't!

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Man:Are you in college? Woman:Yeah. Berry College. Lots of cows... Man:Well my name is Murad. You know, like, Moo to the radical. Moo, like, cows...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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