Why was the little boy crying? Because he dropped his hamster in the garbage disposal

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Wife: I have a confession to tell you my wife said to me one day... Before we got together I was raped by a masked man and I really liked it. Me: I know.

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Man: I am willing to give my life for you. Woman: How about you fucking get one instead and rather seek me out then? Moral: M-M-M-Morale breaker!

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Hey baby me you CHOIN CHOIN under the moonlight..

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- So, wanna go back to my place? - Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhyming get in the van.

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Men. We must always hold the door open, Pull the chairs out and pay for our women whilst remembering to treat them as equals.

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-words can't describe how beautiful you are. -aaaawwwwwwww. -but numbers can. 3/10. -fffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-

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Hey, I may not be too smart, I may not have a big dick, I may not be strong nor cool, but at least I uh...

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-Hi Honey I'm home! -I'm not talking to you! -Oh, Okay. -Don't you want to know why? -No, I trust and respect your decision dear

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

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Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

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A. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together. B. Oh really? Well, if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put N and O together. Oh wait -- they're already there. Huh.

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Hey do you like mansauce? Moral: MORAL KOOOOOOMBAAAAAAAAAAT!

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Your father must be a thief, because I saw him stealing at Target earlier.

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hey wanna come back to my house, and help me kill my dog?

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so how long have you been a bald ghost wombat?

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In regard to the post below. I'm not even joking, one of my mates actually said that to a girl.

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*a guy and a girl meet at a bar and has a great conversation* girl - can I borrow your phone? I told my ex I'd call him when I found someone better. boy - sure, here you go *gives phone* girl - *silence* *after awkward phone call* boy - give me my phone back girl - you dont seem to get it do you... boy - give me my phone back girl - *silence* boy - GIVE ME MY PHONE BACK YOU BITCH *boy takes out a shotgun with him and repeatedly shoots girl* *girl dodges and takes a bazooka and aims for boy* *boy manages to get out of the bar* *boy installs bomb in center of bar* *boy leaves bar* *everyone attempts to get out of bar* *boy locks the door* boy - Yippie kai yay, moth- *explosion* *everyone dies* MORAL OF THE STORY - DO NOT GO INTO A BAR

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You're so hot I'd do you sober.

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I've got a black belt in lovin'.

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-I know you want to ask me out. I am free anytime. -Ok, then go out.

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wanna try out my joystick? (gamer-joke)

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This doesn't have to be a rape.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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