Girl, now I want you to be on top! Okay, what position? DOGGY STYLE! Moral: Sickman Fraud, with that name smart people should listen with one eye open, while geniuses keep their eyes and ears shut.

-Hey babe, if you were homework, I'd do you on my couch, my table, and my bed. -Yeah? You just failed.

- Is it hot in here, or is it just the broken A/C unit?

male:hey what that between your leggs female: my sisters penis

Hey wanna smash pissers?

-how much do i have to pay you to **** me? -how much do i get for taking you back to the zoo?

Yet another one from real life: At law school: Kid to woman: Why don't I ever get any of you?! *Woman laughs* Me: You could start by not whining so much... Kid: That wont ever work! You know that is bullshit! Its not like I am whining I just whine whenever blahblahblah... Me: Sigh... Girl: He is kinda cute... Me: Wha? Moral: Not a real anti joke, since I had not heard from any of them until today, I just got invited to their wedding...

Pick up lines from the stone age: Fail. Man: Hello, you look beautiful, I speak very well, and if you allow me to make love with you, I promise I will protect you and raise the child with you :)! Woman: WHAT? A guy without wild chesthair that speaks instead of grunting and yelling? You to sex me and you do not even got a club? I am SOOO gonna go to Grogg instead! He has like the biggest club and knows how to really HIT a woman! Moral: I would say somethings do change, but Id rather be Grogg than the loser above, of course I prefer hitting ON women first, if that does not work I... Oh right, I am married :P

Guy: Are you looking for a hot, sexy, fertile young man? Girl: No thanks, I used to be one.

Girl: Hey you cutypie! want to ride my newest pimpmobile and get drunk and have unprotected sex? Man: Gee that was mighty brave of you, teehee.. Maybe though, but cant we just get to know each other a bit first? ;) I mean I am a partygirl bu.. Girl: ...Uh, something feels wrong here. Man: Cut! I think we picked up each other scripts... Moral: About mother fucking time someone noticed something! This is anti-pickupline enough for me...

Twinkle winkle little star, cuz my star is what you are... Moral: Heh, that one might actually work if you do it spontaneously and mean it, damn I keep failing at making bad pickuplines, I am so good I cannot fail! I WANT TO FAIL! (Legal disclaimer: Not really I just go hi-wire after... "flirting" yeaaaaaaah lets be subtle now "Moral" Man)

Hey baby, you must be a light switch, cuz every time I see you, you turn me on! Great! Maybe next time I'll electrocute you to death!

"You look like an angel that fell from heaven and hit its face on the pavement."

"You look like Carmen Electra's deformed, burned, dismembered sister..."

I take the the out of psychotherapist

Hey baby that dress is amazing! It would look even better as a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor!

You wanna have sex and get married?? Ok... Sorry.

-Can I buy you a drink? -Go ahead, but only if you buy my boyfriend one too!

If you were a booger, that'd be pretty nasty.

him: why are you so gorgeous? her: i dont know i guess my parents had some really good sex.

Male: Do you know if there is an airport around here? Cause my heart took off, when I saw you... Female: Yeah? Well my heart crashed in the Hudson River when I saw you!

Do you want to see something swell?

Roses are red, violets are blue, I thought I was ugly, but then I met you

Do Your feet hurt? Cause youve been stomping on my dreams for 3 years now

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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