-You look like a dream. -Go back to sleep.

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Hey gorgeous what are you drinking? Cyanide.

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-You smell nice Thanks....... -Have you ever thought of turning your sweat into perfume?

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Girl: Hey classy older man, wanna get to know me better? Man: Sigh... sorry lady I am the man that played Gandalf in that... shitty lords of something movie... Girl: so what? Man: Sigh... you know.. Gandalf the white and Gandalf the gay...? Girl: Huh? Man: Ever seen the X-men? Girl: Yeah... Man: ONE WORD: FAGNETO! Girl: uh.. okay.. "leaves". Ian McKellen: Sigh... should have come out of the closet sooner...

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Man: Hey lady, wanna come home with me? Woman: A man like you :D would ask a woman like me? I... I cannot believe it... sniff... excuse me this is so beautiful... ;D I want to of course of course I want to... Man: Want to? Woman: Tell you to go screw yourself moron! Man: But you said beautiful as you looked into my eyes and seemed so happy... Woman: Yes I was looking at my reflection in your eyes to avoid having to look at your disgustingly ugly face! REJECTED like a SONIC BOOM! (now that one was for the non lesb... I mean non drunk women, see? I am quite equal, even to the weaker, yet hot gender)

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Are your prices by the hour

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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Why was the little boy crying? Because he dropped his hamster in the garbage disposal

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Yeah... you'll have to do.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I wouldn't.

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Don't worry, I love fat birds....why are you crying?

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Guy: Hey baby, did you come by car? Girl: No I walked. Guy: Well I can make you come in mine.

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Male: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Female: did it hurt when they kicked you out of hell?

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Damn, girl, you're hot... You look just like my mom.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'I' and 'U' together. Really? Cos' I like it just the way it is... With 'N' and 'O' together.

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Guy: Happy Birthday Girl: Huh? Guy: You're gonna get raped

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Man - "Does this smell like chloroform to you?" Woman - "Yes it does."

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What's a good comeback if a guy asked me "Bring me a sandwich"?? -COmeback with the goddamn sandwich

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Male: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Female: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore

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Man: Yeah I have done it with thousands of women all around the world... THOUSANDS! Woman: Okay... then ill come home with you, I want an experienced man to be my first... At his house: Woman: I AM SCARED! Will it hurt? Its my first time and... Man: I dunno! I am scared as Its my first time too! :( Moral: A man whose is scared of sex... pfffffff!

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So I saw you walk into the bar from the scope of my rifle and I was wondering if you'd enjoy some unconsentual sex in the back of my van?

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Hello children! :D

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Man: There is a U and I in beautiful Woman: Ya, but there is only a U in ugly

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Hey, you look like a hooker I fondled in Las Vegas

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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