-I think you're the best looking girl in here. -Really? Well, I'd better go find the best looking guy then, hadn't I!

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I heard this one in real life in Spain, pretty good one: Man: Please marry me! I am nothing without you! Woman: If you are worth nothing then why should I want you? Man: Uh... Moral: Its a great honor having a dedicated group of followers making sure my comments always have red thumbs, thanks to this my sociology studies are complete. My thanks to every azzhole out there.

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Are you a dinosaur? Because you look like you got hit by an asteroid.

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hey girl, whats your sign? slippery when wet.

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-Did you fall from heaven? Because your an angel -No but did you? Because your face is fucked up!

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-Why is one breast bigger than the other? -because I popped it and all the silicone leaked out

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You are almost as beautiful as my mother.

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Man: Hey! Are you into stuff like violence robbery rape cheating orgies machismo torture and pedophilia? ;) ;) Girl: WHAT? NO! Man: Ok me neither so you qualify to come home with me. Girl: Well... that honestly makes you better than most of the lot... why not... so yeah lets go!

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Male: "Why does it feel like the most beautiful girl in the world is in this room?" Female: "Because you're here"

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Man: Hey you are so pretty I bet you are a hooker! Woman: Uh.. thanks but no.. Man: Damn... I was hoping to get laid tonight...

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If you were a booger, I would pick up you first.

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Are you water? Because you are very shallow. Now GTFO.

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You know how I know we're going to have sex, tonight? I'm bigger than you.

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girl- how much does a polar bear weigh? girl- enough to break the-- boy- Are you talking about an adult polar bear? boy- then it's around 400-500 kg girl- blast!

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Your butt is so big that I would propably lose intrest during sex.

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Man enters bar and does a lot of magic tricks, all the prettiest women are extremely impressed: Girls: WOW! We would do anything to see more of that! Guy: Uh... damn I forgot what to do after this... Moral: Screw the game man, its a stupid book, just be your moronic self and someone will like you for the lovely disgusting moron that you are... by the way you lost the game :D

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Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Woman: Unfertilised.

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Girl: I was just wondering... Boy: Smell my armpits on July 24th, 2016!

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Man- Hey, baby, wanna come back to my house for some pizza and sex? Woman- No! Man- What's wrong, you don't like pizza?

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- Is this seat empty? - Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.

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Man: Wanna go to my home and have sex? Woman: Well... OK! Man: Wow you are easy!... wait! Where are you going? COME BACK! Moral: They are not easy, they just like a man with balls... and you where obviously not one of them... LAME OVER.

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Man: You like nice guys? ;) Woman: No. Man: *bitchslap* get down on you`re knees and suck me bitch!

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- Haven't I seen you someplace before? - Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.

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He says "Where have you been all my life" She says "Hiding from you....how the hell did you find me?"

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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