Are you an angel? 'Cause you're the only ten I see.

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Hey babe, if you were a Pokemon, I'd choose you. Oh really? Because if you were a pokemon, I'd fight you, win and not even bother to capture you.

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GEDDINTHEFRIGGENCAR

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Is your father a gardener? -No, why? ..Because I was wondering what a cactus like you doing in a place like this.

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You look... clean

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Guy: How much does a polar bear way? Girl; About 500 kilograms

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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Man: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven? Woman: Did it hurt when they kicked-- *sound of gun clicking* Woman: Thanks!

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Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

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You're place or mine? Both, you go to yours and I go to mine.

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- I may not be a genie, but I can make your dreams come true. - First wish: don't speak ever again.

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Guy: Do you wanna be the sun of my life? Girl: Ok sure Guy: Then go stand 13. billion miles away from me

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- Hello There Pretty Lady! - Hi... - Wow, your the fist girl I've met who has bigger boobs than I do! - Tw*t

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-I think you're the best looking girl in here. -Really? Well, I'd better go find the best looking guy then, hadn't I!

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"My mom won't be home for hours..."

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I take the the out of psychotherapist

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You are the personification of beauty. ,..Wanna Shag?

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After hearing a pickup line: -I like your approach, now let's see your departure.

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Does the carpet match the drapes? -Do I look bald?

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- OMG, OMG, OMG, Terry finally said he will go out with me! -OMG, When? -February 30th! -Stacey, There is no February 30th.

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-Hi. Didn’t we go on a date once? Or was it twice? -Must’ve been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

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I put the STD in STUD, now all I need is U.

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http://scriptsbay.com http://scriptsbay.net

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man: you look like my favorite girl. Girl: is that so? Man: yupp, best dog i ever had.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!