-hey girl, you must be a pirate cause you got a lot of booty

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Him: What's it like in Hell? Her: Why are you asking me that? Him: Because you're the devil and I know where the f*ck you came from; I can see you're horny.

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-Are you an angel? -Yeah...actually I am. I remember you-aren't you the guy that fell out of heaven? So THAT'S why your face is so screwed up.

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Don't worry, I love fat birds....why are you crying?

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male: hey i like you can i have your number female: what number? male: your pin number i want your money

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- Lets get outta here and have some fun - If you got your fathers dick....no

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damn, girl... you look like you put your socks on BOTH feet.

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Hey you've got the most beautiful f*cked up teeth I've ever seen.

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is your name macaulay culkin? cuz you're going home alone.

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(At a Funeral) Male: I have a raging erection.

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I want you to come over, so we can go in my room, turn off the lights, go under the covers, and ill show you my glow in the dark watch..just kidding my penis.

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Man: Do you want to have sex at my house Women: No

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Damn, girl, you're hot... You look just like my mom.

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Are you an erection? 'Cause you're growing on me.

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If I could rearrange the period table, I would put Uranium and Iodide together ;)

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How you doin? go away- I have a gun

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Are you water? Because you are very shallow. Now GTFO.

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Those pants are very becoming on you, of course if i were on you id be cumming too.

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-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? -I'm an atheist.

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jack sanders

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Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

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HI, DO YOU KNOW WHY THEY CALL ME DOCTOR RABBIT THE HYMEN DESTROYER? Nero the clit collector: Actually this works pretty good, just wear a random rabbit costume, cut a hole where your CAWCK is, and make sure they are girls under twelve or below (because it kinda loses its meaning with little boys but fuck it anyways, yeah fuck it! FUCK IT TO THE LIMIT!) I work at a daycare center: Because I care.

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-Darling, I will never stop pursuing you. Even from the ends of the earth, I will follow you wherever you go. Really, I love you that much. -"Honey", I will call the police and have you thrown in jail for stalking me. Really, I hate you that much.

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Guy: I think I got lost in your eyes. Girl: Here's a GPS. Go find yourself.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


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