Guy enters a bar: Guy: I have some really bad self-esteem and would really apreciate if someone would give me a chance and... Gorgeous woman: Hey, I would love to get to know you, and maybe take you home and... Guy: WHAT? THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN TO ME! I CANT HANDLE IT! HEEEEEEEEEEELP! (Runs out of bar screaming)

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i'm a doctor.... maybe i can fix that thing you call a face

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You wanna have sex and get married?? Ok... Sorry.

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Ay Girl. Can I get yo digletts?

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Yeah! Keep drinking girl! Ill just lube your backdoor, what? Dont ask, just drink! Moral: I love it when women call me a pig, all men are pigs, and real women dont want some boy...

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If you were a booger, I would pick up you first.

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-Get in the Van

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- Ma'm, do you have a cigarette? - I don't really want one, I just wanted to start a conversation with you.

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Do you have sunburn, or are you always this hot? It's sunburn.

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Hey, nice shoes..... Wanna F***?

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Hello my name is Horny and... oops... I got it wrong didn't I?

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You must be tired... I assume you are because I am after following you on your four mile run through the park today.

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Did it hurt? When I fell from Heaven? NO! WHen you were shot up from hell for stealing my pick up line!!!

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you work at subway? cuz you givin me a footlong;)

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Guy: I believe in women's rights. That's what women deserve. Girl: Oh really? Because I was just gonna go make you a sandwich and get in bed with you, but I guess not...

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Guy: wow! Why are you naked and on top of me? Girl: What are you talking about! We are at a bar! Guy: Oh sorry I am a psychic and keep getting flashes of the near future...

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What happens when a drunk swedish man prank calls 911 from a local bar? The ambulance comes

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guy: can i rape you? girl: No Guy: great that means any sex we have from now on is consensual, thanks

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- Does this rag smell like ether? - MMMPPPHHRPHRRG!

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- If you were a booger I'd pick you first - If you were a booger I'd throw you away...

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Him: I've got something that will fill you up. Her: Sorry, I'm looking for a meal, not an appetizer.

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Her: Guess what? Him: What? Her Yo Mama! Him: Is she that slut i did last night?

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If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd probably leave it as is, seems to be working OK just fine without my internvention. And imagine the work it'd create in terms of all the re-filing alone. Librarians would have apoplexy, and if I came out I was responsible..well, there'd be hell to pay. No, thank you, but no thank you, the alphabet can stay as it is, no matter how hot your body.

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Boy: whats your name? Girl: i dont know, im just s fetus

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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