The word of the day is 'legs'. Wanna come to my place and spread the word?

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Do you come here often? Because you're usually working the streets whenever I see you.

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M: What's a pretty girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine? F: Running and screaming for help

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Man: Wanna hear a joke about my C*ck, nevermind, it's too long Woman: Wanna hear a joke about my P*ssy, oh wait you'll never get it

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You don't sweat much for a fat girl, do ya?

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Boy: Wanna go see a movie. Girl: Which movie. Boy: Texas Chainsaw Massicure. Girl: What is it about. Boy: Unicorns and Rainbows. Girl: Let's go!

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Is there a mirror in your pocket?... Because if so, you should probably take it out and, uh, fix what you have going on there.

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Hey baby me you CHOIN CHOIN under the moonlight..

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Sexual harassment, it can be a touchy subject.

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Drunk guy with high standards part 3: Man: Dunno woman... you are so big and... and... FAT and really huge and stuff but... well... uh.. you are still really damn hot so lets do it! Man: YAAAAARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! Astronauts: Did that guy really eject himself towards the sun? Moral: At least he was right about the really hot part... and that ladies and gentlemen, is the terrible end of the amazing drunk man with high standards, you can read the whole series just by clicking onwards trough my comments and give em a thumbs ups just as you go along.. otherwise they will show up... mean they wo..

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-Go on ,don’t be shy. Ask me out. -Okay, get out.

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

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Hey wanna smash pissers?

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what's a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?

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Guy: Where have you been all my life? Girl: In my room hiding from you.

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You look just like my sister! That's funny,... CUZ IM A DUDE

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What happend to the blue duck that had purple and pink stars on it ? Nothing happend to the blue dick that had purple and pink stars on it Wait A second...

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Guy: Can I have your number ? Girl: We are six.

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wanna try out my joystick? (gamer-joke)

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If you were a booger i'd pick you first. -that, is fucking disgusting.

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-Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I'd be in prison.

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Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Hi, since its our first "Set Time Date" , I want you know I haven't got any STD's

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!