Hey baby, do you play soccer? Because I think I'm gonna score tonight. ... Well, you can't score if the player ain't no good.

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Man enters bar and does a lot of magic tricks, all the prettiest women are extremely impressed: Girls: WOW! We would do anything to see more of that! Guy: Uh... damn I forgot what to do after this... Moral: Screw the game man, its a stupid book, just be your moronic self and someone will like you for the lovely disgusting moron that you are... by the way you lost the game :D

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Online Desperate Asians.com Man: Wow you are a cute asian girl! Where are you from? Girl: Thanks my name Aoi is I am from Japan, you look like nice older man! Man: Japan? Awesome! Remember when we nuked the hell out of your country? Happy days! SLAP A JAP! *Connection discontinued* Man: Eh really sorry, I just get nervous when I meet girls especially the cutest ones... Man: hello?

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-hey, come here a minute.

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I was a little bit nervous to talk to you at first, but thankfully my Aides encouraged me to do it.

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Girl: How come you never look at me when we make love? Guy: Your face is taking away the memory of your sister's.

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Man: Hey whore! I got a job for you! A blow-Job... get it? HAR HAR HARR! Woman: Wtf? Man: Just a joke whore... wanna come to my place?

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I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium were going out and I was like O Mg.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because we are both in Tennessee and I thought asking where you grew up would be a good way to get to know you better.

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Ever had violent sex with a murderer/rapist? ;) ;)

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If I could rearrange the alphabet i would pass on it.

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Hey giiiiiiiiiiirl, I'm no Flinstone but I can make your bedrock.

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Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's my number, so shove it up your A$$.

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Guy: How much does a polar bear way? Girl; About 500 kilograms

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hey you look like a good practice girl.

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Hey baby i have a 3 inch penis but i produce two galons of semen everytime i cum...

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Q: What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? A: My zipper.

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are you a brush because you just swept me off my feet

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hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

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You know, I had a great pickup line, but I just forgot it.

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- You must be a parking ticket cause you have fine written all over you - You must be a wellfare check then.

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GUY- Are you from heaven.....cuz it sure as hell doesn't look like it.

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M. Excuse me Miss. You have seamen on the back of your jacket. W. Are you sure? It could just be Yoghurt. M. Most Definitely. I don't Cum Yoghurt.

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!