I lost my phone number, can I have yours?

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Every kiss begins with K ;) Yeah to bad ugly begins with U

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HE: You must have some hot buns. SHE: Yeah? HE: Cause you got a real butterface to go with them.

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GUY: are you trash? cuz i'd like to take you out friday night GIRL: are you trash? cuz you smell like it

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Nice legs... what time do they open? Cos there is a pungent fish smell and I think you need to wash.

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male: hey wanna ride female: STRANGER DANGER!

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A man walks up to the woman, and says, "I'd like to take you on a date. How about dinner tonight?" The woman agrees, and they both have a wonderful time at a fancy Italian restaurant.

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What's your favorite condiment? Mine's mayonaise.

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Classic story time: Shit that happens out there. Girl: Omg that guy called you a douche! Go punch him! Or else my respect for you is gone. Man: Hey, you called me a douche right? Well... FALCOWN PAWNCH! Girl: Omg you are so violent, my respect for you is gone. Moral: Really, I am speechless... Its a lose/lose situation.

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HE ; " MY NAME'S BOND, JAMES BOND" SHE;" MY NAME'S ****, **** OFF!"

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M: Woah I am drunk baby... But I gotta say... you`re the hottest bitch in town! B: Bark bark!

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excuse me my eyes are up here thats great........where are your nipples

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I can tell you are single. How? Because you're ugly

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-Did it hurt -What when i fell from heaven? -No when you fell from the ugly tree and hit every single branch on the way down

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Woman: ARGH! I hate fist-ing Man: Fist-Ing? THis tiny hand? Nah baby this is mah PINGAS! Moral: Once you go black, you cant go back.

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Hey chicks! I am a very experienced suicide bomber, I was even in the plane that blew up the world trade center A ;) ¨ Moral: This must be the worst pickupline ever for oh so many reasons on so many levels...

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Me: You know what bitch... You are *burp* such a bitch... That I am just gonna smear peanut butter on my crotch and... Lady: Dude, I am a man but okay! Me: You are a guy? Did you have to tell me that? I mean I got beer googles but I hear perfectly well! Then his girlfriend which happened to be my cousin showed up and... *facepalm*

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Does the carpet match the drapes? -Do I look bald?

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He:*walks over* She: What is it now? He:*Unzips fly.* She : OH DEAR CHRIST NO

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- I put the STD in STUD, all I need is U - ...

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-can i buy you a drink? i buy you a taxi?

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Baby, I love every muscle in your body... Especially mine.

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when ilfe gives you lemons i squirt the jiuce in my eyes so i dont have to stare at you anymore :)

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showing people this http://hahgay.com/ p.s after seeng any girls want to come back to my place

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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