Do you know karate... 'Cause I wanna know if you can fight back!

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Are you a Geodude? Cause you're face is rockin'!

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I right next to each other. You say that you want me? Well don't what you come for!!

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ur so hot, i'd let u put ur vagina inside of me

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when ilfe gives you lemons i squirt the jiuce in my eyes so i dont have to stare at you anymore :)

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Grapist: I bet you like getting Graped, tied up and beaten muahahahahaha! I am so gonna do the worst things to you! Woman: YES PLEASE! Man: MAAAAAAAAAAAN your not fun anymore... Moral: Its not grape if she wants it... and I guess grapists dont like that... remember that girls whenever someone is gonna rape you just say YES unless they yell surprise though... then its surprise sex.

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4 out of 5 people enjoy being gangraped

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whats up ho

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Guy: How much does a polar bear way? Girl; About 500 kilograms

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Does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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if I could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd put my dick in your ass

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*When you get her to your place* I'm just going to be honest. I've been on the FBI's most wanted list for quite some time now.

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Yeah! Keep drinking girl! Ill just lube your backdoor, what? Dont ask, just drink! Moral: I love it when women call me a pig, all men are pigs, and real women dont want some boy...

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-Are you a dementor? Cuz you just took my breath away... -Expecto Patronum!!!

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If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put "U" and "I" as far apart as possible.

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Did it hurt? When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down?

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Guy: What does a girl like you doing to a place like this? Girl: Trying to get away from you

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Boy: If i can rearrange the keyboard, i'll put U and I next to each other Girl: It's already together dumbass

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put 'U' and 'I' together. -If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would take 'U' out entirely.

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What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

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How'd you like to earn 14 dollars, the HARD way?

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My penis just died. Can I bury it in your ass?

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Girl: Are you a doctor? Because I think I have the flu. *sneeze*

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Girl: Wanna see my dick? Man: WHAT? Moral: This actually started out as me just mixing up the girl and guy part...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!