Are you from hogwarts, because I really want to put my basilisk into your chamber of secrets

all in all it was a good orgy

Is there someone behind you? cause im seeing people behind your back

He:*walks over* She: What is it now? He:*Unzips fly.* She : OH DEAR CHRIST NO

- Does this rag smell like ether? - MMMPPPHHRPHRRG!

Ryu at a Bar: Hey lady, you seem to be battle ready ;) wanna come home and get to know each other? I know some very "special moves" ;) Girl: Battle ready? Uh... "special moves eh?" OKAY! 2 weeks later: Girlfriend: Puff... puff... when you spoke about how you truly love me with all your heart... I expected more than... this fighting all the time... I wanna see these "special moves" you talk about ;) ;) ;) Ryu: The truth lies in the heart of battle! Girlfriend: Uh sure dear, but can I please go talk with my friends? I feel kind of beaten from uh... all the beatings... and lack of poundings... Ryu: Well... we have been fighting for hours so... SUREYOUCAN!!!! SMACK!!!!! Girlfriend: EEEEEEEEK! EEEEEEEEEK! EEEEEEEEEK! Announcer: KO! YOU WIN! DEFECT! Skill 00000000 Level of Moron 9001 Bonus 98493849384394839483. Ryu: You have to beat Shen Long to stand a chan... I mean I am so sorry dear! I must have walked a bit forward then accidentally ducked and jumped slightly upwards while using my strong punch button!... I am so sorry... its basically all I know to do! Girlfriend: I am sick of this! I am leaving you! Ryu: Argh... I AM BEING LEFT AGAIN? NOOH! Its the Dark... Hadou... I...WILL NOT LET YOU ESCAPE MY EVIL! HADOUUUUUUUKEN! Girlfriend: (dodges) HELP! SOMEONE FIND A DOCTOR! 2 Weeks later: Ryu: yes this... dark side takes me over and... its because all I know is Street Fighting and... uh some Street Fisting but I am new to that an.. Dr. Bob Sagat: Uh yes... well I am afraid you suffer from Schizophrenia Mr... uh...Hoshi? Ryu: Just Ryu...That Hoshi crap is just from the hilariously bad mov... Dr. Bob Sagat: Ok, so just take these medications and this "evil" "side" of you will not bother anyone anymore... now excuse me, I must leave, I have to feed my TIGER! TIGER! TIGER! TIGER! Ryu: huh? Dr.Bob Sagat I have four Tigers you see, and I am training them to do a TIGER UPPERCUT! Ryu: Ok... Ex-Girlfriend: What the hell did this have to do with pick-up? Ryu: Well Uh... do not leave me, I suck at it and I... dont leave! NOOOOOOOOOOO! My... medication... Later Akuma: Hey girl... heard you want something better than your weakling ex Ryu. Girl: Sniff... yeah he is all crazy and stuff... Akuma: Well... I can replace him, I look almost the same without this stupid wig and fake red lenses... besides they do not call me the master of fisting for nothing ;) Girl: SUREYOUCAN! Bonus scenes: Dr.Bob Sagat: You stupid TIGER! Will never learn to do a TIGER UPPERCUT! I am tired of all of you! TIGER GENOCIDE! Special message from WWE (the animal protectors not Wrestling Entertainment you moron): please save the last remaining TIGER! From Dr.Bob Sagats UPPERCUT!

- Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven? - Nah, angels like me, have wings.

Hey, I your dad a baker?...Cuz it would be really cool if he were a baker.

You don't sweat much for a fat girl, do ya?

Hi I am THE MORAL MAN! Moral: I am not famous enough yet it seems... except around my block where woman screams have been so loud people have called the cops... RAWRS... yeah I am bragging, but at least its the truth... (I cant wait for the day I am so famous that I walk into a bar and tell women that I am Moral man and run before they beat me to death)

Husband: Honey, I heard that when you die, you come back as a different creature! Wife: Really!? I want to come back as a cow!! Husband: You're obviously not listening.

Woman: Ugh I wish I could remember who you are, I mean you could even have Aids or H.I.V... Man: Hey yo don worry, Dogta tol `d I am positive so thats that Moral: The H.I.V awareness group was a message: We will go literally f/ck ourselves to death have a nice day.

Don't turn this rape into a murder.

Me noob days the triology... Or something like that. Girl: So you looking for company or sex or something? Me: Something like that. Girl: Cool because you see my friend over there, he is gay too and...*breaking bad Doc tells Walter he has cancer sound* Last time I painted my nails black just because IT LOOKED FUCKING AWESOME OKAY!

Girl: You know I've never kissed a boy....... Boy: Me too

-Hey, what's your sign? -I don't know, but yours must be Cancer.

Your hair is really beautiful. Thanks. Can I make a wig out of it?

Do you believe in love at first sight or do I need to beat you again?

my love for you is like diarrhea. i can never hold it in

-There's a 'U' in beautiful. -Yeah, and there's a 'U' in ugly.

- Is this seat empty? - Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.

here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

Boy: Do you have a boyfriend? Girl: I don't have a boyfriend but I have a Girlfriend !

Girl, I wish you were a car door, cause I'd slam you all night

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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