Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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- Hey, baby, what's your sign? - Do not Enter

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Does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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-Hey, I lost my number. Can I have yours? -No.

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Man: Wanna come to my place? Woman: Maybe if you take of the ski-mask and black clothing... Man: But then you'll ruin the surprise! :(

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You like peanuts? Cause I like penis.

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Do you come here often? Because you're usually working the streets whenever I see you.

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I'd hit that.... with a truck.

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause you d*** sure look like a demon!

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does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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-wow I could just drown in the ocean of your eyes -well why don't you -well I'll steal your sisters number, get lost at sea, and shipreck in her bed Then you can come and save us when she is shouting S.O.S out of the other room

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Real life anti Joke mambo number five: Me: Hey wanna do it? Girl: I am a nun now remember? Me: Yeah but I always wanted to do it with a nun ;). Moral: She forgave me, nine years later :P

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Hey you've got the most beautiful f*cked up teeth I've ever seen.

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GEDDINTHEFRIGGENCAR

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Men. We must always hold the door open, Pull the chairs out and pay for our women whilst remembering to treat them as equals.

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Guy: want to hear a joke about my penis. don't worry, it's too long Girl: want to hear a joke about my vagina. don't worry, you won't get it

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M - wanna have some fun? F - No! M - 0k, i have no choice but to rape you!

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-hey baby wanna get a drink? -no but i wanna get the heck away from you

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he got me some KY jelly for valentines day saying it was going to make me the happiest woman in the world he was right one squirt of that stuff on my doorknob and he couldn't get in no matter how hard he tried

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That outfit looks great on you.. .. It would look even better crumpled up in a pile in an evidence bag

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-Heyyy there (; -Im lesbian.

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Wife: I have a confession to tell you my wife said to me one day... Before we got together I was raped by a masked man and I really liked it. Me: I know.

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Male: I'd give her one Female: I wouldn't have sex with you if you were the last person on earth Male: I was rating you out of 10 you ugly bitch

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MAN- You're trying to imagine me naked aren't you? WOMAN- No. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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