-hey baby wanna get a drink? -no but i wanna get the heck away from you

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If you go out with me there might be some smegma in it for you.

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-Did it hurt? When you fell from Heaven? -Are you implying that I'm satan?

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- Hey do you wanna hang out? - I'm 17.

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It's not rape if you say "Surprise!"

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Guy: (any sexual pick up line) Girl: I'm sorry but I don't think there is enough room in my pants for two assholes.

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MAN: Did it hurt? WOMAN: Did what hurt? MAN: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven? WOMAN: Did it hurt when you were dropped as a baby?

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Him: When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down

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- You're so hot, that if you ate a piece of bread, you'd poop out toast! -You're so cold that if you drunk a glass of water, you'd poop out ice.

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Man: May I please sit next to you for a brief moment? Woman: Sure :), you`re such a gentleman :). Man: Would you care for a bit of violent rapage in you`re anus?

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I have one thing to say to all the woman who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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Those pants are very becoming on you, of course if i were on you id be cu.mm.ing too

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I just killed my wife. What should I do?

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Dude: Did you fart? Girl: No Dude: Oh I'm sorry because you blew me away

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-Your father must be an alien because your out of this world -More like out of your league

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"Hi. You're looking mightily mediocre and I would like to buy you a medium priced drink."

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guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together Girl: Its a good thing N and O are already together

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Female=You Son of a B*tch! Male=Hi Mum!

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Am I having a erection or am I just glad to see you? Moral: My d1ck in my hand is HARDly a better option than my d1ck in a bush.

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Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

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-I'll do anything,no matter how kinky it is if you can say it in three words. -Clean my house.

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Get your coat love. I've got a knife

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Girlfriend: you are much more naive when you are naked, and a small penis, no hair and are 23 years old

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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