-There's a 'U' in beautiful. -Yeah, and there's a 'U' in ugly.

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http://pirater-gratuit.fr hacker un compte fb

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Hey lady, you're really, really cute! Let's go out in the woods, GET NAKED and have sex!

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Me: Hey lady, you are so fucking hot I want to... Lady: FUCK ME PLEASE ME SO HORNY! Moral: One can always dream... *yawn* Zzzzzzzmooth...

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if you were my sister i'd totally get with you.

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Guy -Are you from Tenessee? Girl -No. guy -oh, because you looked kinda southern.

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Man: HELP! HELP! MY PENIS IS GONE! SOMEONE HELP ME FIND IT! Woman: OMG I am a nurse, we must find it before its too late! Where did you last see it? Man: It... it was around inside my pants somewhere... It should not be too hard to find it... cuz its pretty big...

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Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

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Is someone following you? Cuz ive been seeing people behind your back.

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rapee? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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At a bar (for originality`s sake :P) Man: Hello would you want to come home with me and uckucukucekcuah cough... AAAAAARRrghhhhhhhhhhhhhh (dies of heart attack) Woman: Wow that was an original line, ok ill come home with you... err... hello... uh... is everything okay? Moral: Despite this "joke" death is rarely a good pickup line.

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-Do you believe in love at first sight or do you want me to walk by again? -Yeah, but this time don't stop!

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Male: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Female: did it hurt when they kicked you out of hell?

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-What`s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar? -What`s it like being the biggest liar in the world?

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-Can I have your number? -Can my boyfriend punch you in the face?

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One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door. Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The cop was happy and left the shop. The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen doughnuts waiting for him at his door. Then a Member of Parliament came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.' The Member of Parliament was very happy and left the shop. The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen Members of Parliament lined up waiting for a free haircut. And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it.

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-You look like a dream. -Go back to sleep.

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I might not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you

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Ever kissed a bunny inbetween the ears? Nope. I'm allergic to them.

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Man - How was your trip from heaven? Woman - Great... until now.

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Why don't you slip into something more comfortable? Like a coma?

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Famous male actors guide on pick-up. 1. Enter Disco. 2. Say hello out loud. 3. By this point you`re screwed... literally.

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showing people this http://hahgay.com/ p.s after seeng any girls want to come back to my place

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Your father must be a thief, because I saw him stealing at Target earlier.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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