Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Sorry i only sleep with dead bodies.

GET IN THE VAN!!!

- So what do you do for a living? - I'm a female impersonator.

-Hi. Didn’t we go on a date once? Or was it twice? -Must’ve been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

-You must be tired, you've been running through my mind all day. -You look like a rapist.

Man: Are you a beach? Cause I'm sure there's a lot of crabs crawling around down there

I lost my phone number, can I have yours?

girl:go away! boy:okay girl:i need space boy:okay just one meter girl: no i"m not kidding boy:i know girl:my mother hate's you boy:i hate her too.! girl:we are now break boy:okay i"m hungry lets eat! girl:you don't understand me boy:no i"m understand you girl:you are philosopher i hate you boy:what? girl:nothing at the end of the story they loved each other

Guy: Happy Birthday Girl: Huh? Guy: You're gonna get raped

If I said you had a beautiful body I'd be lying.

hey baby i just came in my pants

You're parents must be assholes because baby you're the shit!

Are u in the army cause u make my private stand at attention.

- Hey baby! You make my heart beat. - Oh, well you make my stomach churn.

Do you know karate? Because I'd like to kick you in the face.

Man: So, what's your sign? Woman: Out to lunch. Back whenever!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The holocaust was a disaster, and so are you.

male-"Do you have a rape fetish?" fenale-"No, i don't" male-"Ohh... Well you're not going enjoy this."

Me. Would you like me to get you a ring for valentines day? Girlfriend: Nothing would make me happier! So I got her nothing...

Ever had violent sex with a murderer/rapist? ;) ;)

men: Do you ride horses, because I'd let you ride me all night!

I like your shirt, it would look better in my pants

-Your really nice plus i like girls with flat asses

If you were a booger i'd pick you first. -that, is fucking disgusting.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!