Are you a parking ticket because I'm spending all my money on you and wish you were gone.

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Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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Roses are red Violates are blue Get in the van I have a gun.

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-Do you believe in love at first sight or do you want me to walk by again? -Yeah, but this time don't stop!

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Man: So you will come home with me later? Girl: Sure! Man: Great then ill just go find more women I can bang later in the meantime... Moral: Depending of the kind of woman, this is of no consequence...

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You're so beautiful you could be a tree... Or a high class prostitute

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Farewell to thy, you have been most amusing. Moral: Has left the building.

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-Hey baby, what's yo sign? - U Turn

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-Are you the sun? -No.. Why? -Because you need to stay 93,000,000 miles away from me.

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Guy : Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Girl : No, why? Guy : Because I can totally see myself in your pants!

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hey girl, whats your sign? slippery when wet.

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your so beautiful im blinded! aww really?! no. i was kidding. im just blind.

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Guy: If I could rearange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together Girl: If I could rearange the alphabet, I'd put F and U together

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if u were a triangle u'd be an obtuse one fat ass

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Man: HEY BITCH! LETS HAVE SEX! Damn ugly woman: OKAY! Next day... Man: Damn that was some nice sex, too bad the bitch was damn ugly though, even trough the beer googles... I wonder where she is... "damn ugly woman": woof woof! Bark bark! Moral: Do you see any moral in this immoral piece of shit? (Ps if you are stupid, the bitch was actually a dog... get it?)

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Man: Wanna come to my place? Woman: Maybe if you take of the ski-mask and black clothing... Man: But then you'll ruin the surprise! :(

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Hey girl, I just fuck my diapers, wanna change them ;) Moral: This has to be the one of the worst pickup lines in history.

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Those pants are very becoming on you, of course if i were on you id be cumming too.

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Man: Honestly! I am just desperate, and besides you are damn hot! Woman: Lets go to your place ;) Moral: This works, the anti-part is that no one will believe me nor try it themselves... Incredible how the easiest way is the least used...

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Your skin would make a nice coat.

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MALE: We can do this the easy way or the hard way. FEMALE: Excuse me? MALE: Hard way it is *zip* FEMALE: *gurgle gurgle* *scream*

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"Hey baby, how do you like your eggs in the morning?" "Unfertilized."

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Guy for a girl with a dog: -Does the dog have a cell phone? -Why? is your mom in heat?

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jack sanders

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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