I might not be the best looking guy here but im the only one talking to you

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greetings clarisse...

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In a classy bar: KEEP IT CLASSY! Man: Hello there dear... your eyes sparkle like the sun itself... Woman: Oh... thank you random stranger, that is the most beautiful thing someone have ever said to me :D Man: Really? But you are gorgeous (the two proceed to have a long CLASSY conversation and laughing in a classy reserved matter and drinking classy champagne and whatever... and then: Man: Ahahaha yes that is indeed true... By the way... would you mind becoming the single lonely mother of my children? Moral: skipped most of school classes... class ... overrated...

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-Roses are red, violets are... -SHOW ME YOUR TITS

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Baby! you're on fire! Yeah, well I am an arsonist.

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- Did you fall from heaven? - No, I dug my way up from Hell.

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Were your parents chemists? cuz you look like TEST TUBE BABY :D

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you actually look alright with the lights on.

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A blond, a brunette and a black haired girl are all stuck on an island....stupid women.

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I can tell you are single. How? Because you're ugly

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Boy : Gurle: hi

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Do you want to dance No I suppose a blow job is out of the question then

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-What would you say if I asked you to marry me? -Nothing. I can’t talk and laugh at the same time.

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Are you water? Because you are very shallow. Now GTFO.

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Him. "I'd sure like to get into your pants." Her. "No thanks. One asshole in my pants is my limit."

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M:Hey baby you must be a GENERAL because your making my PRIVATES stand up F:Hmm, Your still a MAJOR disappointment See whaat i did tharrgh?

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If you were homework, I would slam you on my table and do you all night long.

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M: If life had Alt + F4, I would close your clothes. F: Really? I would close YOU down!

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Super man and Lois lane doing it... Supes: WOMAN I AM SO uh.. tHORNY that I want to thrust as hard as I can and... Lois: YAAAAAAAAAAARGH! Supes: Oh noes! R.I.P Lois Lane... Ripped In Pieces Indeed... Moral: Hey at least moral man can get laid... (a moral man fake... well actually original)

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What's your sign? Slippery when wet.

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-- Hey, can I have your number? -- 12

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have a mac10. GET IN THE VAN.

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Does this rag smell like chloroform?

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Did you gain weight? Because I think your gravitational pull towards me just increased.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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