Man: Honestly! I am just desperate, and besides you are damn hot! Woman: Lets go to your place ;) Moral: This works, the anti-part is that no one will believe me nor try it themselves... Incredible how the easiest way is the least used...

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-Go on ,don’t be shy. Ask me out. -Okay, get out.

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Farewell to thy, you have been most amusing. Moral: Has left the building.

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H3LL0 Girls, You need some THERAPEY? Call Nero The Moralman For A qualified TheRapist. The number? You wont get it, so then you will go mad with lust and need therapey Moral: Ooooh... I says ANTI Pickup line... Whats that? More Moral: Nothing is immoral! Everything is Moral MORAL MAN!

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Guy- I would do anything for you. Women- I wouldn't do you for anything!

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Are you a broom? Cause you look like a rather dull, inanimate object that collects dust.

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Guy: So how about that Tom Cruise??? Guy: ... I'm in the wrong type of bar...

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" Grab your coat love ...it's cold in my basement"

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Guy : Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Girl : No, why? Guy : Because I can totally see myself in your pants!

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I put the STD in STUD, now all I need is U.

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here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

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-Do you like me? -No

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Wife: I have a confession to tell you my wife said to me one day... Before we got together I was raped by a masked man and I really liked it. Me: I know.

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Hey baby that dress is amazing! It would look even better as a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor!

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I'm heading back to my place. You want to come? Sorry, you strike me as a person who comes all by himself.

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Were your parents chemists? cuz you look like TEST TUBE BABY :D

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My therapist says I should meet new people.

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him: why are you so gorgeous? her: i dont know i guess my parents had some really good sex.

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If you were a Pokemon I'd choose you!

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when ilfe gives you lemons i squirt the jiuce in my eyes so i dont have to stare at you anymore :)

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Man- How much do 2 polar bears weigh? Woman- I don't know? Man- Enough to break the ice, heyy.(;

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Ever had violent sex with a murderer/rapist? ;) ;)

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Roses are red. Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Ps: I was signing books today, and some douche asked me: Are you that Neronism dude on Horsehead? YOu suck! Anyway, Fuck Neronism. Nero (the other one and his "peeps" are fuckups. (Below: Well actually Tina said if my wife can join, just as my wife said yes... ...And you would think that screwing somebody else after asking your wife is immoral... DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE MY WIFE BECAUSE OF WHO SHE IS? Its called trust people *cape flowing in the air moon in background* Trust! NeroMetal I play Street Fighter V, And am an author, and I guess I get laid a lot... AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT NERONISM OR THAT OTHER ASSHOLE IS! I just called myself asshole...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!