-Good afternoon miss, would you care to try our new line of perfume? -Sure what's it called? -Chloroform...

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Him: I'd go through anything for you. Her: The exit's over there.

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Man: I can control all women in the world! Guys: WOOOOT YEAH! Me: I can control all men! Guys: Huh?? Man: What the fuck is that good for you like guys or something? Wait hey let go of me! Moral: And off the endless cliff you all go MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!... Ladies, it seems it is up to us to repopulate this world, not sure if we can make it, but I shall do my best, but since I am just one, you better do all the moving, so I can conserve my energy.

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Man: "Did you fall from heaven? 'Cause it looks like you landed on your face"

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he: hey,do you have a phone? she: yeah! why,do you want it? he: no,you should consider selling it and doing a plastic surgery with the money.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I wouldn't.

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Boy:can i go out with you? Girl: no

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Hey baby, let me take you to heaven.

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My penis becomes hard and hard when I see your mom, but weak when I see you.

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For Christmas I got some toy soldiers, To play with when I'm in bed, But I got bored with my seargents and majors, So I played with my privates instead.

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A guy asks a girl in the bar if he can buy her a drink she denies saying that alcohol is bad for her legs the guy asks why do they swell? No. they spread.

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Man: Hey you are so pretty I bet you are a hooker! Woman: Uh.. thanks but no.. Man: Damn... I was hoping to get laid tonight...

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How much does a polar bear weigh? On average 1135 lbs.

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I'm jealous of every girl that hugs you, Because for that one second she held my entire world.

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-Your the hottest girl i have ever met -I'm a man

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Guy - Hey baby, what's your sign? Girl - ?

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Do you wanna be a pirate ship? Because there can be tons of seamen inside of you.

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-- Hey, can I have your number? -- 12

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You are almost as beautiful as my mother.

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Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

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If we were confronted, by a vicious man-eating bear with chain-saws for hands and fangs, holding a hammer; than I would sincerley hope you wouldn't be harmed because you're pretty.

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Hey girl, you a single mom I heard, I love that. Really? :D SURE! Hey just between us, how sexy are your kids on a scale from one to over nine thousand? Moral: Watch out ladies, I can only take care of so many of you... (you have kids? Meh, get lost,nothing personal, just you know... your kid)

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I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium were going out and I was like O Mg.

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here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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