My wife does not know it but every time we have sex I put a dollar aside to go toward her Christmas present. So far she is getting a cup of coffee.

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you have your job, I have mine, so let's do it in the kitchen

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Knock Knock... Who's there Want Want who Want who fuck

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- Hey, baby, are your parents retarded because you're pretty special.

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So which of you ladies wants to recieve child support payments from me next year?

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Guy: Do you have a mirror in your pocket... Girl: Why? Because you can see yourself in my pants, I've heard that before. Guy: No, I want to check how I look before I go over and talk to your sister.

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Did it hurt? When you fell from the hoe tree and banged every dick on the way down?

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Hey baby that dress is amazing! It would look even better as a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor!

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Ay Girl. Can I get yo digletts?

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girl:go away! boy:okay girl:i need space boy:okay just one meter girl: no i"m not kidding boy:i know girl:my mother hate's you boy:i hate her too.! girl:we are now break boy:okay i"m hungry lets eat! girl:you don't understand me boy:no i"m understand you girl:you are philosopher i hate you boy:what? girl:nothing at the end of the story they loved each other

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Im the demanding customer, your Dominos Pizza, I will make you Cum in 30 minutes or less.

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Get in the van.

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Are your parents retarded? Because you're something special

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Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Woman: Unfertilised.

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Hey Baby, Whats your name? Dave ...(silence)...

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Hello I am a violent rapist, oh wait I meant to say my name first and the other much later... Moral: its official you suck!

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EVERYONE ELSE

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Do your parents have Down Syndrome? Because your really special.

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I'm your Edward and your my Bella

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The anti part of below comment, may be the fact that its going to get thumbed down to Hades. Moral: They see me rollin, they envious... women that look like supermodels that work as jurists dont come easy... unless you are Moral Man. *Plays moral man theme* (Character inspired by Salvador Dali, I mean what greater inspiration than the man that celebrated each day as he woke up in the body and mind of the greatest man ever? Me? Same, but I also wake up next to the greatest woman ever.)

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Here, flowers for a pretty lady. These arent flowers they are leaves. Well you arent a pretty lady so hah!

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How much does a polar bear weight? Enough to break the ice... and throw you into the freezing water and drown you, because you're really ugly.

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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Your teeth remind me of a song Which one? Black and Yellow

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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