- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Pee extra hard in a urinal when there's someone else in the bathroom so you don't seem weak

Guy: I believe in women's rights. That's what women deserve. Girl: Oh really? Because I was just gonna go make you a sandwich and get in bed with you, but I guess not...

-how much do i have to pay you to **** me? -how much do i get for taking you back to the zoo?

Boy: Do u have a pen? Girl: Yeah, here Boy: Umm..its out of ink Girl: What? Boy: It doesn't work Girl: R u sure? Boy: Don't believe me? Fine, u try it... Go on, write your cell phone number right here....

Hey, you're cute... lets bang.

Ugly begins with U. But awesome ends with ME.

Boy: I want to get into your pants. Girl: No way! I already have an ass in there!

Hey gurl, you smell like tape!

B:wanna go out sometime? G:I'll go out now and get away from you.

He: Will we have sex tonight? She: Yes, only I don't know with who you will.

"Is it true you're a lesbian?"

Im like a thief and ill steal your virginity!

Shaved your beard, so I can see you're a woman.

Van what van? GET TO THE CHOPPAH!

-Hey Baby, wanna date? -No thanks, I'm allergic to fruits

So, I hear you want to rape Nathan Skye's body.

him: your like the sun in the morning. her: that so sweet! him: Your very big and i can even stare at you for more then 2 secondes.

Do you believe in love at first hear? Because ive never dated a blind chick before.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have a mac10. GET IN THE VAN.

Guy: If you look at your keyboard, you see U and I together. Girl: Look underneath. It says JK.

Boy looks at cloth -Does this smell like chlorophorm?

M. you have a sweet pussy. W. WHAT!? M. Your cat, she is very friendly

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book