i wanna see your dick? i cant seem to find it...... sorry

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Do you believe in love at first hear? Because ive never dated a blind chick before.

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Guy: I believe in women's rights. That's what women deserve. Girl: Oh really? Because I was just gonna go make you a sandwich and get in bed with you, but I guess not...

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I lost my Nobel prize, can you help me find it?

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So, I hear you want to rape Nathan Skye's body.

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- You're so hot, that if you ate a piece of bread, you'd poop out toast! -You're so cold that if you drunk a glass of water, you'd poop out ice.

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From 1 to America how free are your tonight? North Korea

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Decaffeinated coffee is like a hooker who only wants to cuddle.

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Would you like to come home with me you wetback spic?

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Hey, are you an angel? Because you smell like you've been dead for a while

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Pooh... my my... it sure its fucking cold outside, I have cooled down now, excuse me while I get back to... My well... Je ne sais quoi... Allright, foursome sex! There you got it, thumb this bitch down because I dont like bragging, but these girls dared me to do it, and we all gotta provide and share ;) Moral: I am the only man of course feck! The alternative is disguting!

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, id put my dick in your mouth.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I wouldn't it's fine the way it is

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Is someone following you? Cuz ive been seeing people behind your back.

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Drunk guy with high standards part 3: Man: Dunno woman... you are so big and... and... FAT and really huge and stuff but... well... uh.. you are still really damn hot so lets do it! Man: YAAAAARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! Astronauts: Did that guy really eject himself towards the sun? Moral: At least he was right about the really hot part... and that ladies and gentlemen, is the terrible end of the amazing drunk man with high standards, you can read the whole series just by clicking onwards trough my comments and give em a thumbs ups just as you go along.. otherwise they will show up... mean they wo..

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What do u get when u mix a black a guy and an octopus The best dam cotton pickin machine you'll ever see!

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-Hey baby, what's yo sign? - U Turn

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*When you get her to your place* I'm just going to be honest. I've been on the FBI's most wanted list for quite some time now.

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Chick:- Don't worry, we all get nervous when we meet people. My brother: yeah, but my buttcrack gets sweaty & smelly when i get nervous!

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B:wanna go out sometime? G:I'll go out now and get away from you.

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-Hey Baby, wanna date? -No thanks, I'm allergic to fruits

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Guy: Hey babe, do you have a GPS... I'm lost in your eyes. Girl: Make a U-Turn

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Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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Why couldnt susie see out her window? She was not home, see was to busy drowning in the ocean.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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