male:hey what that between your leggs female: my sisters penis

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Hey girl, I just fuck my diapers, wanna change them ;) Moral: This has to be the one of the worst pickup lines in history.

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Hey wanna smash pissers?

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How much does a polar bear weigh? I don't know. Quite a lot, actually.

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*on Halloween* Male: My name's Dick, and you're a very pretty PUSSY-cat. Female: I'll cut off your penis.

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Woman: You've got the body of a god, too bad that it's Buddha... Man: You've got the face of a Princess, too bad that it's Diana.

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Jack is riding his new yellow bicycle. His father bought it for his 12th anniversary. Jack is ecstatic to have his first ride down his street. Erick thinks its ugly.

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Still a better love story than Twilight

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Female: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Male: I'm actually a broom in disguise.

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Guy- Hey, wanna come back to my place? Girl- Umm... I don't think 2 people can fit in that box...

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Do you have an STD? No. DO you want one??

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Hey baby, you must be a light switch, cuz every time I see you, you turn me on! Great! Maybe next time I'll electrocute you to death!

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- Do you wanna play the rape game? - NO! - That's the spirit!

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My penis becomes hard and hard when I see your mom, but weak when I see you.

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guy: can i rape you? girl: No Guy: great that means any sex we have from now on is consensual, thanks

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I just shat my pants..... can I get in yours?

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can i just touch your face for like, a couple seconds.

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G: YOU KILLED MY FATHER! M: Yes yes I killed my father too, but you do not see me whining about it... M: So ... wanna date? I am quite the Male Bison in bed ;) G:NOOOOO! M: Just get in the damn plane! G: BISOOOOOOOOOOOON!

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My greatest strength is my self-deprecating sense of humor, but its probably not worth getting to know me.

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Man: (Ugh worst food ever). Girl: U like it? Man: I love it girl! Girl: Aww, I am gonna make this every day ever! Moral: Hey, if she got big tits, then keep lying.

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Her: Guess what? Him: What? Her Yo Mama! Him: Is she that slut i did last night?

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-Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I'd be in prison.

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Hey baby, i like your hair -girl takes off wig

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- I can make your wildest dreams come true. - I know. I had this nightmare some creep wouldn't leave me alone...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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