Hey girl, I just fuck my diapers, wanna change them ;) Moral: This has to be the one of the worst pickup lines in history.

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Me 17 years old: Hey, girl, you are hot how old are you? Girl: 14. Me: What but you have enormous... Never mind, uh nice evening huh?... My friend: Big boobs on er huh? I would have hit on her too had it not been for... Me: Shut up... Crap! Moral: That was a crappy day!

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Female: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Male: I'm actually a broom in disguise.

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Are those space pants? Cause there's not enough space in my house to fit your ass.

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Did anyone ever tell you you smell like Catalina? Did anyone ever tell you you smell like a cat?

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Jack is riding his new yellow bicycle. His father bought it for his 12th anniversary. Jack is ecstatic to have his first ride down his street. Erick thinks its ugly.

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M: You make me wanna be a terrorist! W: Why? M: I so wanna blow on you right now...

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What's a good comeback if a guy asked me "Bring me a sandwich"?? -COmeback with the goddamn sandwich

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Nice legs what time do they open

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Do you have Groupon? *wait for response* Because you look fucking cheap

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In the USA: Man: Hello, I am half Iraq and half Afghanistan, my name is Osama Bin Allah! Girl: Oh... Uh em... I do not mind you nor anything but, you are like uh... civilized and stuff right? Just asking! Man: Of course miss, so how many camels to get into your pussy? Girl: OMG! Man: WAIT YOU MISHEAR ME! I SAY HOW MANY CARAMELS TO GET INTO YOUR... never mind... Moral: Seriously just give up, this must be the worst "pickupline" ever

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It's not rape if you say "Surprise!"

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Do you live around here often?

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Guy: Can I have your number ? Girl: We are six.

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Your breast is like a beer holder, you would allow me to store beer in between your breasts, while I talk on the phone

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Dont blame me for using moral all the time its just part of my sig...nature XD Moral: Not a pick up line, so its pretty anti.

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If you were homework, I would slam you on my table and do you all night long.

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why cant you comb your hair cuz you got cancer othere guy :ahahahaah fag

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-I wish i were DNA helicase so i could unzip your genes. -You're a loser

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MAN- Wanna have sex? WOMAN- No get away from me you freak?!!! MAN- Well... I gave you a choice...

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what goes up and down , side to side all the time? a compass get your mind out of the gudder.

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Do you want to see something swell?

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*is your name angel cuz that's all i see? *is your name asshole cuz that's all i see

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At a moral man bar... "the most awesome place on earth": Man: I thumb down my comments now, and somehow they end up thumbed the next day... Woman: Uh... what comments? Moral: Be specific... or at least dont brag to pick up chicks... now if you wanna be yourself and could not give shit about the rest, then go ahead! It will actually improve your chances!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!