- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Are you a parking ticket? Cause you got fine written all over you.

Man - How was your trip from heaven? Woman - Great... until now.

Guy: I lost my phone number, Can I have yours? Girl: Your phone service would help you get a new one.

Do you live around here often?

Hey baby, i like your hair -girl takes off wig

-I wish i were DNA helicase so i could unzip your genes. -You're a loser

You remind me of America. How so? Because you so fat!

Hey baby, if I could rearrange the alphabet U and I would have sex.

MAN- Wanna have sex? WOMAN- No get away from me you freak?!!! MAN- Well... I gave you a choice...

Hey baby, my name is Richard Gozinia. But my friends call me Dick. Dick Gozinia.

WOMAN! GO MAKE ME A SANDWICH NOW! Girl: But I do not even know you!? Man: Oh... uh.. hi sexy.. wanna get to know me?

Nice legs what time do they open

If you were attacked by a bear with chainsaw arms i hope it stays away from your face, because I think you're cute.

Man: (Ugh worst food ever). Girl: U like it? Man: I love it girl! Girl: Aww, I am gonna make this every day ever! Moral: Hey, if she got big tits, then keep lying.

Dont blame me for using moral all the time its just part of my sig...nature XD Moral: Not a pick up line, so its pretty anti.

Did anyone ever tell you you smell like Catalina? Did anyone ever tell you you smell like a cat?

M: You make me wanna be a terrorist! W: Why? M: I so wanna blow on you right now...

Mens most noob things to say during sex: "Thank you" "Do I really get all this for free?" "Sure you don't want me to pay you?" "MOTHER!" crying "You`re wet down there! Did you just pee yourself? DISGUSTING!!!" "I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!" "STOP SUCKING CUZ IM ABOUT TO CUM!!"

Do you have Groupon? wait for response Because you look fucking cheap

Hey, I your dad a baker?...Cuz it would be really cool if he were a baker.

is your name angel cuz that's all i see? is your name asshole cuz that's all i see

Skilled man enters a bar: Man: Lady, I am a scientist... Lady: So? Man: I also have black belt in several martial arts... Lady: Your point? Man: uh... I have uh... Lady: Sigh... gets up and leaves Moral: Knowing what and how to be attractive to women is an art on its own...

- If you were a booger I'd pick you first - If you were a booger I'd throw you away...

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book