Man: DTF Cutey? Woman: DTF off Asshole?

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Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

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Man: Your body is a temple! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

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- hey baby i wanna show you something - wait i wanna show you something too -what is it? -my fists

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-Do your feet hurt? Because I couldn't help but notice you look about 75 pounds overweight and I hear that is rough on your feet.

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What did the priest say to the rabbi? We are both religious figures at the head of our places of worship.

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Is it hot in here or are you just suffocating me in this relationship

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Hey babe wats ur sign Caution men at work

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Guy- Hey girl do u like math Girl-um, sure Guy- ok I got a problem... Add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and multiply the bodies.... What does that equal.... Girl- u and ur homo friends

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Hey i got a job for you. But it blows.

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That outfit looks fantastic on you... ..it would look even better in an evidence bag

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Are you from Wales, because...well...

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Waiter- For you, sir? Male: I'll have a Strawberry Daquiri, non-alcoholic, please. Waiter- And, for your company? Male: For her, a long-island-iced-tea, with a twist of Rohypnol.

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-If I could arrange the alphabet, that would be cool.

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Want to get a pizza and fuck? What you don't like pizza?

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Is that a mirror in your pants? We should have sex immediately.

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-You smell nice Thanks....... -Have you ever thought of turning your sweat into perfume?

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- Are you from Tennessee bec- - Yes

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Was your dad a thief? Because he's in jail

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Him: When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down

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Did you fall from heaven because you landed on my wind shield some how

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun so get in the van.

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Female: You're hot! Male: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha get in the van.

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Hey gorgeous what are you drinking? Cyanide.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!