- Anti-Pickup Line

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun so get in the van.

Waiter- For you, sir? Male: I'll have a Strawberry Daquiri, non-alcoholic, please. Waiter- And, for your company? Male: For her, a long-island-iced-tea, with a twist of Rohypnol.

Hey babe wats ur sign Caution men at work

If you were a booger, I'd pick you first.

I told my wife I met someone who looked just like her she asked Was she gorgeous I didn't know what to say.

Male- You have 206 bones in your body, You want another ?

He: Hey bay wanna danc- She: Leave.

guy: wanna make some money? girl: Na, I do it for free, i'm offering free herpes

Did you fall from heaven? Because, I believe in the afterlife.

if u were a triangle u'd be an obtuse one fat ass

Actor walks in street... Woman: HEY ITS YOU! THE GUY THAT PLAYED GANDALF THE GAY!... Uh I mean Gandalf the GRAY! Actor: WRONG WOMAN! I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNETISM! Moral: Please take no insult Esteemed Mr.Ian McKellen you are a fantastic actor... as for the rest of you, feel free to feel as insulted as you want... I mean its your own trucking choice :P.

Woman: Hey you look hot and cool, wanna chat? "Man": Meh.. I just stand here with my beerglass trying to look cool in hopes that women ask me out... Woman: UGH! "Man": May I please come with you? Eh... where are you going... HEY! Moral: Trying to look like James Bond in the darkest corner of a bar is not flirting you trucking moron!

If i could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'I' and 'U' together. Really? Cos' I like it just the way it is... With 'N' and 'O' together.

-Is there anything I can do for you? -Fill my care cup. Oh, actually, I don't think you can manage to do that.

adam burdass

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven and banged every guy on the way down?

my love for you is like diarrhea. i can never hold it in

At a drinking place :P: Man: You dare mock the great Sh... Woman: I am sorry I did not mean to humiliate that much... ehehehehe you are just a stupid jlttle nerd and all... :) Man: You will die moral... Woman: What?! Uh... did I mention how awesome you are? What was your name again? Man: You weak pathetic fool! 8 hours later: Woman: Please! Let me stay! Just for a little longer! Barman: Sigh... fine have a drink on the house. Woman: sips drink and dies Barman: Mission complete sir, she died instantly! Man: Instantly without pain? THAT WAS PATHETIC! Now... SUICIDE! Barman: No I refuse! Man: Drink it... or face the true WRATH OF SHAO KAHN! Barman: The true wrath? ANYTHING BUT THAT!Punches himself in the balls hoping he dies from the pain, passes out and tries again Man Is That your best? That was pathetic! Its official, you suck! Bhahahahahahaha! Moral: Fear the Wrath of Shao Kahn!

"Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!" "My parole officer would go nuts!"

Girl: "In all of my years, I've never laid eyes on a more attractive, sensitive, and understanding man. With all of my heart, I adore you. Your eyes are pools of heavenly water, teeming with life and love; your succulent smile crafted as elegantly as Mona Lisa's. Your words could move nations; your voice could soothe beasts. Do me the ultimate pleasure of accepting my eternal devotion to you." Boy: "I'm gay."

Why was the little boy crying? Because he dropped his hamster in the garbage disposal

Hey i got a job for you. But it blows.

Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa what I don't want for Christmas?

Female: You're hot! Male: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha get in the van.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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