- hey baby i wanna show you something - wait i wanna show you something too -what is it? -my fists

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boy: hey wanna hang out some time?! girl: O MY GOD! r u hannah montanna?!

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If you were a booger, I'd pick you first.

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- Are you from Tennessee bec- - Yes

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Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

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He: Hey bay wanna danc- She: Leave.

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Man: Hey you are so pretty I bet you are a hooker! Woman: Uh.. thanks but no.. Man: Damn... I was hoping to get laid tonight...

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At a bar (for originality`s sake :P) Man: Hello would you want to come home with me and uckucukucekcuah cough... AAAAAARRrghhhhhhhhhhhhhh (dies of heart attack) Woman: Wow that was an original line, ok ill come home with you... err... hello... uh... is everything okay? Moral: Despite this "joke" death is rarely a good pickup line.

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-Adam, am I the only girl in your life? -Who else is there?

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Are you a speeding, aggressive driver? Because your running straight up my ass

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Let me stick it in...just once baby...that's all I'll need. ;)

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Man: Hello! I am SUPERMAN! And you are so hot you are my Kryptonite! Woman: then you better get lost before you die! Man: Uh well... yeah uh... walks away (in non super speed strangely) Moral: Think things trough sometimes...

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Did you fall from heaven? Because, I believe in the afterlife.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my toe hurts.

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Boy-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until I heard that horrible pick-up line.

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Do you wanna go halves in a bastard?

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Hey did you fall from Heaven? Cos I think you are angel. If I'd fallen from anywhere that high I'd be in hospital with serious injuries or dead. Do the logic.

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Guy: Hey, cutie! What's your name? Girl: JOHN CENA.

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Him: When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down

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MAN: Did it hurt? WOMAN: Did what hurt? MAN: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven? WOMAN: Did it hurt when you were dropped as a baby?

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-Hey, what's your sign? -I don't know, but yours must be Cancer.

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Hey baby, let me take you to heaven.

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Guy:Are you wearing space pants, cause that ass is out of this world! Girl:No, they're baseball pants, cuz this ass is out of your league.

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Boy:do you know to spell "Idiot" with just one word? Girl:how? Boy:U

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!