Sigh... No I do not have a van... Just get in the plane!

NO WAIT SON ITS 999 FUCK COME ON! DONT GO "NERO SAYS WITH ME SON!" I mean that shit you pull on everyone, come on man, I posted wrong... Yeah your word is law and all that So can we like make a deal? You pay my repair wreck of a car and you can slash the damn tires yourself if you wanna later?

If you were a booger, that'd be pretty nasty.

Man: HEY BITCH! LETS HAVE SEX! Damn ugly woman: OKAY! Next day... Man: Damn that was some nice sex, too bad the bitch was damn ugly though, even trough the beer googles... I wonder where she is... "damn ugly woman": woof woof! Bark bark! Moral: Do you see any moral in this immoral piece of shit? (Ps if you are stupid, the bitch was actually a dog... get it?)

Is your dad a terrorist?? 'Cause you're a sex bomb.

Man, stay alive, I dont even got time to read that shit. See you around son.

What did the priest say to the rabbi? We are both religious figures at the head of our places of worship.

Baby if you were homework, I would do you all the time

Man: So you will come home with me later? Girl: Sure! Man: Great then ill just go find more women I can bang later in the meantime... Moral: Depending of the kind of woman, this is of no consequence...

Mother: Fuck me son fuck me harder. Me: Mother no! My body is not ready aaaaaaaaaarghhh! Moral: Why do dreams have to stop when it gets good? Dont know son, ready for round two?

HERE COMES NERO! Ladies get your red thumbs ready, guys... Fuck off with all due respect.. To the ladies. Me: Who am I? Woman: Nobody as far a I care... Me: :D MORAL: I am Nobody, Nobody is PERFECT!

Guy- Hey girl do u like math Girl-um, sure Guy- ok I got a problem... Add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and multiply the bodies.... What does that equal.... Girl- u and ur homo friends

If I could rearange the alphabet id put "I-W-A-N-T-S-E-X-Y-O-U together. SIr, not really but that was kinda impressive. Me: I know...

A long time ago I had a vision of someone like you. I was in a psych ward, wearing a straight jacket. Would you like some blended cheese?

She - Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? becuase your-- He - I did not fall from heaven, you ignorant little twat.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I right next to each other. You say that you want me? Well don't what you come for!!

Hey baby, are you Star Trek? Because I watch you every night in the darkness.

Did you just fart? Cause it smells like shit in here

Your butt is so big that I would propably lose intrest during sex.

He: Did it hurt? She: When I fell from heaven? heard it before... He: No, when you fell from the ugly tree!

Man: There is a U and I in beautiful Woman: Ya, but there is only a U in ugly

Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Guy: You look two times as beautiful with makup on. Girl: Really? I think you would too.

-Are you the sun? -No.. Why? -Because you need to stay 93,000,000 miles away from me.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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