hey, your cute. hey, your not.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

Man: Well... you seem female enough at least... wanna come home? Woman?: Uh... well... okay ;) But I am a man thought ;) Man: That is disgusting! I am so ashamed! Not Woman: Oh, well sorry :(.. Man: So... as I said you SEEM female enough so wanna come home? The other man: :D I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU ASKED ME! ITS SO BEAUTIFUL... so well... NO! Man: This is not getting anywhere is it? Author. NO!

thumb_up thumb_down +67

This tux is rented by the hour, are you?

thumb_up thumb_down +35

You smell just like my mom...

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adam burdass

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- Professor Dumbledore, where are we? - You're dead, stupid. Snape trolled you.

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Your father must have been a theif, because you look like a pikiey

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If you were a booger, I'd pick you first.

thumb_up thumb_down +92

Roses are red Violets are blue Im a serial killer So GTFO before i kill you

thumb_up thumb_down +76

This one is for the ladies: Man: If I could put 6 and 9 on my calculator we would have the greatest time ever ;) Woman: If you did that id just put 911 on my cellphone.

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On a scale from one to ten, you're about a two.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Shy-guy: Hey uh, girl, we have been on like 40 dates, what do you um... You know say we go to my place for once and have some drinks? Shy-girl: Eh, well su-sure I mean its been over forty dates, but ill just take coffee if its oka... Shy-guy: OMG YOU DAMN EASY SKANK! HOLY SHIT YOU WHERE GONNA GIVE IT ALL WHERE YOU NOT? LOL NO TIME FOR DESPERATE BlTCHES! Moral: Not to be confused with the slightly less popular Nintendo character Shy Guy

thumb_up thumb_down -82

Girl: Are you a doctor? Because I think I have the flu. *sneeze*

thumb_up thumb_down -84

male-"Do you have a rape fetish?" fenale-"No, i don't" male-"Ohh... Well you're not going enjoy this."

thumb_up thumb_down -106

*At a concert* guy- hey if you were that drum set, i'd bang you on that stage all night

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If you were Mufasa I'd help scar push you off the ledge

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Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa what I don't want for Christmas?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Are you being followed because i've been see someone behind your back!

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-Hey, have we met before? -No, because I don't remember ever seeing a face that made me this nauseous.

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- hey baby i wanna show you something - wait i wanna show you something too -what is it? -my fists

thumb_up thumb_down -11

- Have we met? - Honey, we're not meeting now.

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He: Did it hurt? She: Aww when I fell from heaven? Thanks! He: No, when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. She:...

thumb_up thumb_down +82

Guy- Hey girl do u like math Girl-um, sure Guy- ok I got a problem... Add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and multiply the bodies.... What does that equal.... Girl- u and ur homo friends

thumb_up thumb_down +76

-Hey sit on my face and I will guess your weight

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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