Female: You're hot! Male: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha get in the van.

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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For you thinking what is that shit below this comment? Go fuck yourself, for those that wonder why I typed that excellence, well read whatever... So why am I here once a year and type a lot of insanity here? Because I am quitting smoking... AGAIN. So after banging two chicks (one my wife STEAKSAUCE!) I just want a smoke right? RIGHT? To chill the adrenaline... My wife does not smoke (well if you can smoke cock then she is still the best smoker in town) Seriously, Tina has Prince... That explains her breath ugh... I am gonna get one anyways for great justice.

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Man: I bet I can scream so loud I can break the walls this post is made of. Woman: Pfff bullshit.. Man: POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!!! Woman: Wow, I wanna go home with you! Man: Sorry, I dont wanna go home with you Moral I dont bang women I "have something to prove to" if ever... heck just ask a woman what makes her cool enough to ask/demand you to prove yourself... and you may just hit the soft spot...

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Hi, since its our first "Set Time Date" , I want you know I haven't got any STD's

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Man and woman in bed, as the man looks troubled: Woman: Hey you are not in the mood? Whats wrong? Man looking down his pants: SNAKE! ANSWER ME! SNAKE WHATS WRONG? SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKEEEEEEEEEEE! Woman: We arent gonna have sex huh? Man looks down pants again: Nuh huh... game over girl... game over...

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Are you a Potato? Because I love Potatoes.

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do you clean your pants with windex cause i can see myself in them

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-"Hey babe, you gotta nice ass!" -"Yep, and it doesn't like a rude one staring at it."

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: What? Him: When you fell out of the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down?

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I told my wife I met someone who looked just like her she asked Was she gorgeous I didn't know what to say.

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Man: Hey you are so pretty I bet you are a hooker! Woman: Uh.. thanks but no.. Man: Damn... I was hoping to get laid tonight...

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- Have we met? - Honey, we're not meeting now.

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hey i know spanish french german russian and Punjabi. got a talented tongue ;)

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Man: (in indian accent) HELLO I AM VERY RICH INDIAN MAN, I HAVE COLLECTION OF EXPENSIVE CARS AND LIMOS, I TAKE LADY HOME AND MAKE SWEET LOVE TO HER, THEN GIVE HER LOTSA JEWELS AND MONEY! Woman: Cool ill come home with you. Man: Uh... can you lend me money for the bus?

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Don't turn this rape into a murder.

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Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

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Guy: Hey is your dad a jeweler? Girl: No, He died a year ago due to a heart condition.

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"Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!" "My parole officer would go nuts!"

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Guy enters a bar: Guy: I have some really bad self-esteem and would really apreciate if someone would give me a chance and... Gorgeous woman: Hey, I would love to get to know you, and maybe take you home and... Guy: WHAT? THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN TO ME! I CANT HANDLE IT! HEEEEEEEEEEELP! (Runs out of bar screaming)

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Is that a banana in your pants? Can I have yours?

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Men. We must always hold the door open, Pull the chairs out and pay for our women whilst remembering to treat them as equals.

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How does a ghost walk through walls? There's normally a door.

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M: On a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight? F: North Korea

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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