Put the lotion on the skin!

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-My love for you is like diarrhea, I cant hold it in...

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Hey girl, is your name Ethiopian food? Because your playing hard to get.

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HELLO I AM BORAT! MISHIMUSH! I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE THE MOVIE OF MAKING THE RAPE OF THE AMERICAN WOMAN! WILL YOU HELP US? Woman: NO!!!!!! Oh... ok Mishimush! We make the other Movie then, BORAT THE CRUSHINGS OF AMERICA.

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Boy- Did it hurt when you fell- Girl- From heaven?!? AWWW <3 Boy- No the whore tree when you banged every guy on the way down.

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boy - would you like to dance? girl - hell no! boy - I think you misunderstood me. I said you look fat in those pants. girl - That's why I said "Hell No!" girl - I'm trying to deny the fact that I look fat in my pants. boy - damnit! girl - Phew!

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Stable relationships are for horses.

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You're so hot, you should wear a burkha over your face.

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man: may I impale you on my stake? woman: O.o (for goth girls)

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Hey babe wats ur sign Caution men at work

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- I'd do anything for you. - Die.

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Man: Hello! I am SUPERMAN! And you are so hot you are my Kryptonite! Woman: then you better get lost before you die! Man: Uh well... yeah uh... walks away (in non super speed strangely) Moral: Think things trough sometimes...

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Did you fall from heaven because you landed on my wind shield some how

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Wow! You know, your eyes are like blueberries, wait, can I actually, can I actually, I'm kinda hungry, can I, can I have them?

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Boy- I'm heading back to my place. Want to come? Girl-Sorry you strike me as a person who cums all by himself.

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Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

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B: Can I have your number ? G: Sure.. 666

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-hey girl, you must be a pirate cause you got a lot of booty

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- Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven? - Nah, angels like me, have wings.

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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Girl:Want to go out this Friday? Boy: No I like to stay inside. Girl: No I mean are you free this Friday? Boy:No Im expencive!

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"I'd like to get you out of those clothes. Really, they aren't very flattering. That color looks awful on you and those pants make you look fat."

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- If i could rearange the alphabet i'd puit you and i together. - That's not necessary because N and O are already together.

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- Did it hurt? - What? - When you were catapaulted from the firey bowels of Hell?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!