On a scale from 1 to 10, can I get your number?

As original as it gets: Domestical... Dog with a top hat and monocle: Yap Yap! *wiggles tail* woof woof! Dog?: MEOW!! HISS! *scratches dog and throws her drink at his face or you know... something that increases dramatic tension* and leaves. Dog: HOWL! *whimpers* :( *throws top hat away* Moral: They say every dog has his day, but I do not think this relationship was never meant to work out :(

Hey I used to be a man, but I'm pretty horny.

Pointless truth? Man: Hey, there is always a really slutty dressed woman at every bar with a cowboy hat, fake tits and really spread legs, why? Woman: To get ignored. Moral: SUUUUUUUUUUUUURE!

He i would love to have sex with you She. I know but you have aids

free candy....

Is that a mirror in your pants? We should have sex immediately.

Hey girl, ever tried a double dildo with a man before? ;)

Wife: I have a confession to tell you my wife said to me one day... Before we got together I was raped by a masked man and I really liked it. Me: I know.

Man: Wanna go to my home and have sex? Woman: Well... OK! Man: Wow you are easy!... wait! Where are you going? COME BACK! Moral: They are not easy, they just like a man with balls... and you where obviously not one of them... LAME OVER.

My friends just bet me 50 dollars that I couldn't pick you up if I came over and spoke with you, would you like a few free drinks on their money?

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

Hey big girl ;), why you alone? You ate all of your friends?

Excuse me, is the red bike outside yours? Because it is parking illegally, I'll have to take your details so I can report you to the authorities...

It that a tsunami in your panties or are you excited to see me.. :)

Man : Wanna go to my house tonight? Woman : I'm not sure if a rock can fit 2 people inside.

-How did your date go last night? -It was going alright but then I started crying uncontrollably. -Nervous habit? -Pepper spray.

Men. We must always hold the door open, Pull the chairs out and pay for our women whilst remembering to treat them as equals.

are u an angle because i have a boner oh what fail

-Your father must be an alien because your out of this world -More like out of your league

Man: I wanna know what love iiiiiiis... And I want you to show meeeeeeeeee! *Woman slams man with baseball bat* Man: Urgh... ARGH MY FACE BLEEDING EVERYWHERE! WHYYYY! Woman: I love baseball! Moral: Stupid singing idiot, if that is not the worst pick up line ever, then some other is!

Man - I know I don't look like much now, but I'm drinking milk. Woman - Not mine!

Classic story time: Shit that happens out there. Girl: Omg that guy called you a douche! Go punch him! Or else my respect for you is gone. Man: Hey, you called me a douche right? Well... FALCOWN PAWNCH! Girl: Omg you are so violent, my respect for you is gone. Moral: Really, I am speechless... Its a lose/lose situation.

guy: you're so beautiful, did you fall from heaven? girl: if I was I would be dead by now hun?

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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