Are you Jamaican? Because I love black women

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-Hey babe, if you were homework, I'd do you on my couch, my table, and my bed. -Yeah? You just failed.

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Boy: You remind me of the ocean Girl: Because I'm mysterious, adventurous, and romantic? Boy: No, because you make me sick

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Are you an angel? 'Cause you're the only ten I see.

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-Adam, am I the only girl in your life? -Who else is there?

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I have never dated a horse-faced woman before :)

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Have you just been fishing? The strong fishy smell seems to be coming from you.

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guy: you're so beautiful, did you fall from heaven? girl: if I was I would be dead by now hun?

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Man: DTF Cutey? Woman: DTF off Asshole?

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Him: Nice legs. What time do they open? Her: Members only, I'm afraid,

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-How much do you love me? -Count the stars in the sky and you'll know. -But it's the morning. -Exactly.

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what's a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?

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free candy....

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Guy: Hi, I am sexually attracted to you. May I walk over to the bar and purchase you a drink and then another and then another untill you become intoxicated and more likely to allow me to have sexual intercourse with you? Girl: You speak funny. Get lost.

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I am Lucifer, my color is blue I already got my queen TO HELL WITH YOU! Moral: Know my name and fear it, I am now and forever.

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Actor walks in street... Woman: HEY ITS YOU! THE GUY THAT PLAYED GANDALF THE GAY!... Uh I mean Gandalf the GRAY! Actor: WRONG WOMAN! I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNETISM! Moral: Please take no insult Esteemed Mr.Ian McKellen you are a fantastic actor... as for the rest of you, feel free to feel as insulted as you want... I mean its your own trucking choice :P.

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Man: I wanna know what love iiiiiiis... And I want you to show meeeeeeeeee! *Woman slams man with baseball bat* Man: Urgh... ARGH MY FACE BLEEDING EVERYWHERE! WHYYYY! Woman: I love baseball! Moral: Stupid singing idiot, if that is not the worst pick up line ever, then some other is!

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Guy : your looking well! Girl: awh thanks Guy: You must have shaved this morning.....waaaaaay

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-Is there anything I can do for you? -Fill my care cup. Oh, actually, I don't think you can manage to do that.

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me- hey baby wanna hve sexual intercourse girl- sure because using the word intercourse in a sentence tunrs me on.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and G and L and Y together because that is what you are.

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so how long have you been a bald ghost wombat?

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-Hi miss are you a catchup? -hey is this some corny pick-up line?,,,okay fine. why? -because I want to dip my hotdog to you

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And then it hit me.....no really now I'm bleeding

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!