- Anti-Pickup Line

Man: Wanna go to my home and have sex? Woman: Well... OK! Man: Wow you are easy!... wait! Where are you going? COME BACK! Moral: They are not easy, they just like a man with balls... and you where obviously not one of them... LAME OVER.

guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together Girl: Its a good thing N and O are already together

I hope you want kids, cause i've left my condoms at my girlfriends place.

Hello im a thief and I'm here to steal your purse

Have you just been fishing? The strong fishy smell seems to be coming from you.

Women love it when you kiss their neck. Just not while they are driving and while you're in the back seat and when they don't know you...

Girl: Are you a doctor? Because I think I have the flu. sneeze

Man trying to be smart: Man: HELP THERE IS A GIANT BOMB DOWN MY PANTS! ITS BULGING AND ITS GONNA EXPLODE KILLING US ALL! Nurse: ILL REMOVE IT! GRABS "EXPLOSIVE EQUIPMENT" AND RIPS IT OFF" Nurse: Weird this organic bomb looks like a peni.. Man: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGG Moral: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRHhhhhhhhhhhhhhgEsgRSGRSRfRSfSFSr

Mario: Ey princess, wanna make the sexy time eh? Princess: With a fat Italian plumber? HELL NO! Bowser: MWAHAHAHA I AM SO GONNA RAPE YOU WITH MY SPINY DICK! Princess: HELP HELP MARIO I WILL DO ANYTHING JUST SAVE ME! NO BOWSER PLEASE DO NOT PUT IT IN THERE! ITS TOO TIGH... Shigeru Miyamoto: So this is how I wanted to make the Super Mario series... sexy eh? Girl: DISGUSTING! Shigeru Miyamoto: Well what do you think about the idea with Monkey Dong and the other girl tha...HEY WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

man: wanna know how i know we're going to f**k tonight? woman: how? man: cuz im stronger than you!

Are you Jamaican? Because I love black women

M: Your clothes look great on you. They would even better on my floor. F: No they wouldn't, they would just get dirty. M: You and me should get dirty then. F: Why would I want to get dirty, I'm perfectly fine being clean?

so how long have you been a bald ghost wombat?

Male: Man, if we were married... Female: What? We'd make beautiful children? Male: No, I'd leave your sorry, and ungrateful ass and make you stay with the kid.

A modified classic, props to the original poster: Man: Ask me out! Woman: Ok, get out! Man: No no, I said ASK me out. Woman: Okay... will you please get out? Man: No but thanks for asking me out, I am so gonna tell your friends how I rejected you asking me out. Moral: When beaten... THERE IS NO BEATING! If negative people can turn everything into a loss, thinking positive call help you turn anything into victory. I mean Hitler murdered millions right? Arent you happy (Jew or not), that it was not you? VICTORY! (if somehow Pyrrhic depending on how you turn on it... But if you wanna turn a gain to a pain, go ahead...)

Hey girl, I heard you are a lesbian! So which part of lesbia are you from? Moral: Geography is overrated, he got laid.

What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

Is that a ladder in your tights or are you just a cheap whore?!

I'll eat your poop

Your the penisbutter to my vagmite;)

he: hey,do you have a phone? she: yeah! why,do you want it? he: no,you should consider selling it and doing a plastic surgery with the money.

Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

Boy : Gurle: hi

"OMG A SAMSUNG!" Lol, thats cool man, as for the car, the engine is shiny and flawless, (you know for a fiat) and I have not used it since I you know "bought it" as in won it from my ex while playing poker? Id give it back to her if she was not such a bitch. Honestly dude, its a fiat, and that piece of shit you call a car, I mean man, we have been towed from the free way like six times already? XD And that is just the few times I want to sit in that piece of shit XD I mean the seats pop off and there is "custom space to transport marijuana there man XD" I seriously hope you bought it that way, because stoners aint my friends. Seriously dude, the Fiat (aka "car") is yours, you know that you are bankrupt because you keep trying to fix that piece of shit on wheels of yours XD, and hey, surprise kiddo, I renewed the engine, so its new and shiny, and free, and fuck if not only the engine itself is worth ten more times than... A billion of those pieces of shit you drive XD No seriously, you know me, Im The Hannibal, I am the beast but I like it classy, and its pretty embarrassing sitting on that piece of shit you call for a car. I know we are from different worlds pal, but take it, just gave myself a bonus at work (legal of course) but I got to say it... "A SAMSUNG OMG" XD And yeah, I know you been eyeballing that "car" aka Fiat, its yours whenever you want it, just tell people I am leasing it to you (I mean it I really do, thats my only condition) Moral: "I DRIVE PIECES OF SHIT FOR BREAKFAST!" PROTIP FOR GETTING ANYWHERE IN YOUR CAR: Put it The opposite way, and have the towing car tow you TOWARDS the place you want to get to XD (hey, how many times you been towed JUST from the freeway? I mean I hate hunting, but do you really use that shit in the Forrest too? Answer here, be real, and come get your car.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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