- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Man: I wanna know what love iiiiiiis... And I want you to show meeeeeeeeee! Woman slams man with baseball bat Man: Urgh... ARGH MY FACE BLEEDING EVERYWHERE! WHYYYY! Woman: I love baseball! Moral: Stupid singing idiot, if that is not the worst pick up line ever, then some other is!

girl - holy sausage! boy - what happen! girl - i broke my foot! boy - oh!

guy: you're so beautiful, did you fall from heaven? girl: if I was I would be dead by now hun?

Boy : Gurle: hi

there is a 50% chance that we make s** tonight from my side i agree

Man with huge arms and HUGE muscles enters a... pub! (for variety`s sake) "Hey you like fisting!" Woman: Yeah kinda.. I mean HOLY SHIT NO! I DONT PLEASE STOP NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH! Moral: Get a room you two! (a moral man original)

Hey I used to be a man, but I'm pretty horny.

-Are you free anytime soon? -No. I'm very expensive

Hi there, the voices in my head are telling me to talk to you.

so how long have you been a bald ghost wombat?

Guy: Da da da da da! I'm loving it. (looks at girl's crotch)

Him - Would you like to dance? Her - NO! Him - I'm sorry. I think you misunderstood me. I said, "You look fat in those pants."

Man - I know I don't look like much now, but I'm drinking milk. Woman - Not mine!

hey your pretty... pretty ugly!

-Is there anything I can do for you? -Fill my care cup. Oh, actually, I don't think you can manage to do that.

HE: You must have some hot buns. SHE: Yeah? HE: Cause you got a real butterface to go with them.

I can tell you are single. How? Because you're ugly

Man: I bet you havent seen a really big dick before ;) ;) Woman: No... but I have seen yours... The man proceeds to stare at the floor and leaves in shame...

Guy: Have you ever been to Thailand? Girl: No Guy: Well maybe I should take you to Bangkok

did it hurt ? did what hurt? when your fell from heaven? because it looks like you landed on your face :O

Man: Hey, I write the most perverted mini stories on ANTIPICKUPLINE ;) Any woman: ME SO HONNY ME LOVE YOU LONG TIME! Moral: Hentai keeping peop... never mind... not into animated cartoons DO YOU THINK I AM A PERVERT OR SOMETHING?.. cant help it that my mother looks like a damn hot pornstar though...

Guy: Roses are red Violets are blue Girl:Violets aren't blue there violet... dumbass read a book

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

Man: I wanna know what love iiiiiiis... And I want you to show meeeeeeeeee! *Woman slams man with baseball bat* Man: Urgh... ARGH MY FACE BLEEDING EVERYWHERE! WHYYYY! Woman: I love baseball! Moral: Stupid singing idiot, if that is not the worst pick up line ever, then some other is!