- Anti-Pickup Line

you look like my mother

Girl: Hey, why don't you and I go out to dinner? Guy: Thanks, but if I wanted to watch a whore stuff her face full of meat, I'd just load up Redtube.

Guy: Da da da da da! I'm loving it. (looks at girl's crotch)

Can I go to your house and play with your Jigglypuff?

A modified classic, props to the original poster: Man: Ask me out! Woman: Ok, get out! Man: No no, I said ASK me out. Woman: Okay... will you please get out? Man: No but thanks for asking me out, I am so gonna tell your friends how I rejected you asking me out. Moral: When beaten... THERE IS NO BEATING! If negative people can turn everything into a loss, thinking positive call help you turn anything into victory. I mean Hitler murdered millions right? Arent you happy (Jew or not), that it was not you? VICTORY! (if somehow Pyrrhic depending on how you turn on it... But if you wanna turn a gain to a pain, go ahead...)

HE: You must have some hot buns. SHE: Yeah? HE: Cause you got a real butterface to go with them.

Hey girl, I heard you are a lesbian! So which part of lesbia are you from? Moral: Geography is overrated, he got laid.

HEY BITCH! GET YOUR ASS HOME AND GIVE ME A THUMBS UPS AT HORSEHEAD NETWORK! Moral: And be rewarded ;) (unless you are fucking ugly, then you still get the gift of voting me whatever way you want)

Your so hot my pants will explode if I don't take them off now...

- You must be tired, you've been running through my mind all day. -No, your mind is so small I can't even take a step in it!

guy: you're so beautiful, did you fall from heaven? girl: if I was I would be dead by now hun?

Nero: My name is Nero... Woman: Why I mean you aint black? Nero: Sure about that? Moral: In the Darkness... We are all the same...

- How 'bout we go to your place and take a shower together? - I think my husband and little baby would get a kick out of that!

are you a brush because you just swept me off my feet

Man: I wanna know what love iiiiiiis... And I want you to show meeeeeeeeee! Woman slams man with baseball bat Man: Urgh... ARGH MY FACE BLEEDING EVERYWHERE! WHYYYY! Woman: I love baseball! Moral: Stupid singing idiot, if that is not the worst pick up line ever, then some other is!

Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

"OMG A SAMSUNG!" Lol, thats cool man, as for the car, the engine is shiny and flawless, (you know for a fiat) and I have not used it since I you know "bought it" as in won it from my ex while playing poker? Id give it back to her if she was not such a bitch. Honestly dude, its a fiat, and that piece of shit you call a car, I mean man, we have been towed from the free way like six times already? XD And that is just the few times I want to sit in that piece of shit XD I mean the seats pop off and there is "custom space to transport marijuana there man XD" I seriously hope you bought it that way, because stoners aint my friends. Seriously dude, the Fiat (aka "car") is yours, you know that you are bankrupt because you keep trying to fix that piece of shit on wheels of yours XD, and hey, surprise kiddo, I renewed the engine, so its new and shiny, and free, and fuck if not only the engine itself is worth ten more times than... A billion of those pieces of shit you drive XD No seriously, you know me, Im The Hannibal, I am the beast but I like it classy, and its pretty embarrassing sitting on that piece of shit you call for a car. I know we are from different worlds pal, but take it, just gave myself a bonus at work (legal of course) but I got to say it... "A SAMSUNG OMG" XD And yeah, I know you been eyeballing that "car" aka Fiat, its yours whenever you want it, just tell people I am leasing it to you (I mean it I really do, thats my only condition) Moral: "I DRIVE PIECES OF SHIT FOR BREAKFAST!" PROTIP FOR GETTING ANYWHERE IN YOUR CAR: Put it The opposite way, and have the towing car tow you TOWARDS the place you want to get to XD (hey, how many times you been towed JUST from the freeway? I mean I hate hunting, but do you really use that shit in the Forrest too? Answer here, be real, and come get your car.

You stole my heart..... Don't worry, i have three more back home in my freezer.

Twinkle winkle little star, cuz my star is what you are... Moral: Heh, that one might actually work if you do it spontaneously and mean it, damn I keep failing at making bad pickuplines, I am so good I cannot fail! I WANT TO FAIL! (Legal disclaimer: Not really I just go hi-wire after... "flirting" yeaaaaaaah lets be subtle now "Moral" Man)

Charmeleon is Red, Squirtle is Blue, If you were a Pokemon, I'd choose you.

I can tell you are single. How? Because you're ugly

-You're fat! -No I'm not. -You will be, when my dick is in you

girl - leave! boy - no girl - leave now! boy - i cant girl - why boy - i broke my foot girl - oh

Me during the noob days at a bar: Me: So this is fun, want to go to my place and watch The Matrix trilogy all night or something? She: Naaah, I already watched them, but I am sure we can watch something else all night right? Me: Nah, you see I just moved in, and I don't have any other movies, so yeah nice meeting you though! facepalm

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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