Miss excuse me but... Moral: Admitt it fucker, you cant pick up a girl by apolgizing for whatever you are gonna do beforehand. GIMME FIVE! (red thumbs, red is the color of love or something)

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Losers pick-up sex guide. 1. Create a beautiful environment at home, with candles, romantic music, etc. 2. Buy lube, some sexy female underwear, a couple of sex toys, some erotic magazines to excite you`re partner. 3. Pick-up you`re stuff and masturbate.

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Are you from hogwarts, because I really want to put my basilisk into your chamber of secrets

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You're so hot, you should wear a burkha over your face.

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Lets play the Yes/No game the rules are you can only say yes or no once to the questions, No. 1 Are you beautiful?, No.2 Are you Lying?

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Man: May I have this dance? Woman: Take it, it's all yours [goes away]

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the word of the day is legs lets go to your house and spread the word

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Male: hey sexy whats your sign? Female: dead end!

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Man: How much does a polar bear weight? Girl: No idea... Man: Me either... By the way! Did you hear of the great blahblahblahblah that did blahalblahblah! Moral: Breaking the ice... easier than it seems...

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As original as it gets: Domestical... Dog with a top hat and monocle: Yap Yap! *wiggles tail* woof woof! Dog?: MEOW!! HISS! *scratches dog and throws her drink at his face or you know... something that increases dramatic tension* and leaves. Dog: HOWL! *whimpers* :( *throws top hat away* Moral: They say every dog has his day, but I do not think this relationship was never meant to work out :(

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-Hey babe, if you were homework, I'd do you on my couch, my table, and my bed. -Yeah? You just failed.

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Have you ever heard of World of Warcraft?

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Hi! Do you like fat guys with no money?

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Hey baby, I wanna solve your equation with longggg devision! ;)

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- You must be tired, you've been running through my mind all day. -No, your mind is so small I can't even take a step in it!

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Hey, Are You From Tennessee, Because Your License Plate Says Tennessee.

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-Are you free anytime soon? -No. I'm very expensive

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Man: Wanna come see my collection of stamps? ;) Woman: Actually id prefer we go to your place have sex ;) Man: GEEEEEEEZ! What does a man have to do to show off his stamp collection here?

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"Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material." "I'm vegan."

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He- You've got something on your ass. She- What? He- Oh never mind, it's just a period stain.

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Man - "Does this smell like chloroform to you?" Woman - "Yes it does."

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Guy: Da da da da da! I'm loving it. (looks at girl's crotch)

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Where have you been all my life?! Said the 78 year old alzheimers patient to his teary eyed wife of 50 years.

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Hey, I may not be too smart, I may not have a big dick, I may not be strong nor cool, but at least I uh...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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