Do you believe in love at first sight or do I need to beat you again?

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Man- How much do 2 polar bears weigh? Woman- I don't know? Man- Enough to break the ice, heyy.(;

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Girl, I wish you were a car door, cause I'd slam you all night

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can i take a dump in your mouth?

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Get your coat love. I've got a knife

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Man: Hey, want to go back to my apartment and engage in intercourse? Woman: No

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Hey babe, take a walk on the wild side. (;

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Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

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have met you before? i like eating my dogs shit.

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With the escalating price of rohypnol, most girls aren't worth my attention.

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-So, you wanna...? -I'm on my period.

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-Excuse me do you know how much a polar bear weighs? -Enough to break the ice? -Ummm... yea... *silence*

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if i was a fly, i'd be all over you, because you are the SHIT.

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-Are you Jamaican 'cos jamaican me crazy! -... *stabs*

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I thought I was ugly, but then I met you

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Nice hair, can I pull it?

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Hello little girl would you like some candy, yes? ;-)

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? nwaaahhh *blushing or something* Because it looks like you landed on your face.

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Have you met Ted?

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Your clothes are making me uncomfortable, take them off.

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-Eeeeeeeey girl how much does a polar bear weigh? -An adult male weighs around 350–680 kg (770–1,500 lb),[4] while an adult female is about half that.

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Did you just fart? 'cos you blew me away

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Man: May I please sit next to you for a brief moment? Woman: Sure :), you`re such a gentleman :). Man: Would you care for a bit of violent rapage in you`re anus?

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Hey, nice shoes. Where did you buy them ? My girlfriend wants shoes like that.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!