-Hey baby, what's yo sign? - U Turn

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" Grab your coat love ...it's cold in my basement"

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he got me some KY jelly for valentines day saying it was going to make me the happiest woman in the world he was right one squirt of that stuff on my doorknob and he couldn't get in no matter how hard he tried

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Guy: So do you wanna come over to my place? Girl: Not really but thanks for the offer.

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Low confidence edition: Woman: Hi there cutie, you new here? Guy: Lady, believe me I am out of your league. Woman: You look really nice and I was wondering if... Guy: No really, believe me, I am boring and a virgin, but my mom says I am nice, but pfft no, just stop wasting your time and giving me false allusions please... Moral: Someone kill that faggot!

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Guy: Would you like to dance? Girl: no Guy: Good! Because I have to go take a shit!

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Did it hurt? When you fell from the hoe tree and banged every dick on the way down?

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Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Blob fish are ugly and so are you.

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rohypnol. rape drug

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Okay, now one where I actually succeeded okay? I know this is not like "goodpickuplines.com nor anything but hey... She: I used to have the nicest goldfish. Me: I got one myself. She: Really? Is it at your place? Me: Duh! She: Lol can we go see it? Me: Sure!... Oh wait... Oh, it died last week :( She: Can we like you know... still go see it? ;) *That sound you get when you score a billion billions on an arcade machine*

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So you want tonight to be consensual or not?

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Gurl, I'll do you like I do my homework. Slam you on the table and do you all night long!

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Close you`re eyes and open you`re mouth. *unzips pants*

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The word of the day is 'legs' , The word of tomorrow is Aardvark .

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-Isnt this the bus to Vermont? -No, its an pineapple without a flute. -Are you a bus driver? -No, im an umbrella!

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Yeah... you'll have to do.

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Guy: Hey would you like to dance? Girl: No! Guy: Oh come on! Don't be picky. I wasn't!

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nice kid... want another?

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Girl, you must have fallen from heaven...because you're dead.

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GUY: are you trash? cuz i'd like to take you out friday night GIRL: are you trash? cuz you smell like it

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Sexual harassment, it can be a touchy subject.

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If I said you had a beautiful body I'd be lying.

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GET INTO DA CHOPPAH! Moral: IM LIEUTENANT JOHN KIMBLE! I HAVE A BUNCH OF QUESTIONS YOU HAVE TO ANSWER IMMEDIATELY! Whoos your daddy? YOU STAP IT! YOU IDIEOUT!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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