Girl, wanna fuck rite now? Sure! Man! You are such a hoe! *walks away disgusted* Moral: Be careful for what you ask for.

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-Wanna have sex? -No -Damn

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roses are red violets are twisted bend over b**** your about to get fisted

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Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

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I stole this pickup line from Antipickupline.com.

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Put the lotion on the skin!

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ur so hot, i'd let u put ur vagina inside of me

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I have no gag reflex.

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Hey baby i have a 3 inch penis but i produce two galons of semen everytime i cum...

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girl - holy sausage! boy - what happen! girl - i broke my foot! boy - oh!

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Did you just fart? 'cos you blew me away

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-Hi. Didn’t we go on a date once? Or was it twice? -Must’ve been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

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- Hey, baby, what's your sign? - Do not Enter

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(boy gives flowers to a girl) Girl: Are these for me? Boy: Nope, I just want you to hold them for me for a second..

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I put the STD in STUD, now all I need is U.

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Man: Hello there young lady, I am Elton John and I would very much like to have sex with you! Girl: OMG ITS... Wait! Wow you look a lot like him! But you cannot be real lol *leaves* Man: Man... I look and dress just like him! What could have gone wrong? Man getting the operation cost me a fortune too! Next time I am gonna try Freddie Mercury! Moral: "Dats gay Fifthy cen... I mean Gangstalicious!"

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Man: Hey whore! I got a job for you! A blow-Job... get it? HAR HAR HARR! Woman: Wtf? Man: Just a joke whore... wanna come to my place?

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-Your the hottest girl i have ever met -I'm a man

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Are you an angel? 'Cause you're the only ten I see.

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Boy: Do you have a boyfriend? Girl: I don't have a boyfriend but I have a Girlfriend !

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Man: You got such beautiful eyes... they are so round and sensual, so full of life and bouncy and... Woman: Those are not my eyes! Man: TITS! I meant TITS! Damn I thought I had screwed up my chance to pound you`re ass for a second there... PHEW!

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Hey girl, ever tried a double dildo with a man before? ;)

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Every kiss begins with K ;) Yeah to bad ugly begins with U

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Roses are red violets are blue this isn't a poem I'm a botanist.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!