- Hey, baby, what's your sign? - Do not Enter

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As a man I am afforded greater opportunity then my equally qualified female counterparts. I have made it a life goal use this opportunities for greater good.

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"Is it true you're a lesbian?"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The holocaust was a disaster, and so are you.

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Why couldnt susie see out her window? She was not home, see was to busy drowning in the ocean.

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I'm an Ice Bear, I guess i just broke the "ICE" between us ....

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You must have a large mass because i am highly attracted to you

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A man is pulled over by a police officer and a conversation takes place: Man: What's the problem officer? Cop: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone. Man: No sir, I was going 65. Wife: Oh Steven. You were going 80. (Man gives his wife a dirty look.) Cop: I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light. Man: Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light! Wife: Oh Steven, you've known about that tail light for weeks. (Man gives his wife a dirty look.) Cop: I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt. Man: Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car. Wife: Oh Steven, you never wear your seat belt. Man: Shut your mouth, woman! Cop: Ma'am, does your husband always talk to you this way? Wife: No, only when he's drunk.

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Man: HELP! I am dying of disease and have only one day left to live! My only wish... "sob" is to procreate... to have a son or a daughter... Woman: Aww... well maybe I can help you... Man: :D I cant believe it (tears in eyes) Woman: What are you dying of? Man: Aids... Woman proceeds to disappear in a ball of smoke. Moral of the story: Dunno find it yourself ffs I dont even know why people read this crap... funny typing it though.. thumbs ups for that :D

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Male: Hey baby you wanna play telephone, i got the string and you got the cans! Female: ...

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A. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together. B. Oh really? Well, if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put N and O together. Oh wait -- they're already there. Huh.

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Look at the keyboard, u and i are together. Look underneath, it says jk.

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male:hey what that between your leggs female: my sisters penis

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Man: If I were to rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together Woman: So, all you want to do is make MANJUICE? you disgust me...

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why was the girl stupid beacuse she had brain sergy

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Girl, I wish you were a car door, cause I'd slam you all night

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Whats best about having sex with twenty six year olds?..... Theres twenty of them!

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- I can tell that you want me. - Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave.

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Whenever I look at stars I think of you... Because your only beatiful from a distance.

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Drink this!

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Guy: Did you use Windex on your pants? Girl: No, why? Guy: Because I see myself in your pants.

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- Hey baby, what's your sign? - Dead End.

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Boy: I want to get into your pants. Girl: No way! I already have an ass in there!

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!