- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Q: Continue the pattern. 1,2,3,4,..... A: other numbers.

You must be a parking ticket. Because you are dressed like i'd have to pay.

He: Will we have sex tonight? She: Yes, only I don't know with who you will.

Hey, are you an angel? Because you smell like you've been dead for a while

-Does beauty run in your family? -It obviously doesn't in yours!

At a bar... sigh... Woman: Hey cutie wanna go home? "Man" hello I am twelve... what is this? Moral: Hello I am eight... what is this?

Drink this!

If i could rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and G and L and Y together because that is what you are.

At some random bar: Man: I am Duke Nukem! Woman: DISGUSTING! Man: Huh? Moral: Sometimes you have to play the new games to understand the old...

M: What's your name? W: Jenny. M: What's your number? W: eight-six-seven-five-three-oh-ni-yie-yen

Girl: Wanna see my dick? Man: WHAT? Moral: This actually started out as me just mixing up the girl and guy part...

Do you believe in love at first sight or do I need to beat you again?

Handsome rich looking man: I would like to take you somewhere nice, maybe watch a movie at the cinema, then we could go to my place and have a romantic dinner.. finally... Girl: YES YES! Man: as I was saying... Finally I can make sweet love with your dog...if its fine by you... Girl: wtf?

-ILY -Aw. Spell it out it will make it more special. -I'm Leaving You

Can I have your number? -I don't have one.

Guy: I got you a gift. It's a Necklace. Girl: Awww thats so nice. Guy: BAZINGA Its my dick.

I hope you're not a vegetarian.... because my dick is made of meat.

Me 17 years old: Hey, girl, you are hot how old are you? Girl: 14. Me: What but you have enormous... Never mind, uh nice evening huh?... My friend: Big boobs on er huh? I would have hit on her too had it not been for... Me: Shut up... Crap! Moral: That was a crappy day!

Man: Lust is a terrible thing! Woman: I agree. Man: So come home with me and help me get rid of it.

male: hey wanna ride female: STRANGER DANGER!

Man - Hey you're kinda pretty! Woman - Um thanks... Man - Whoa slow down! I said kinda.

Let's not turn this rape into a murder..

You wanna have sex and get married?? Ok... Sorry.

hey, your cute. hey, your not.

Anti-Pickup Line

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