Mom im sixteen and after watching some japanese cartoons and dads gone, I wonder if I can... Son please put your pants back on! But mom! Im the man in the house now, so I invited my friends so you and I can have a stamina sex contest and... Moral: If she does not tell you to put up your pants... Well, you are the man in the house son ;)

Me noob days again: She: So, you like it here sweetheart? Me: Excuse me, why the hell are you rubbing my leg? She: Would you prefer I rub something else? Me: What the hell am I doing here anyways Duh! Then I sober up at home... And ran towards the shower, its really not that easy to drown yourself to death in a shower is it?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Blob fish are ugly and so are you.

Are you on your period, because there's a blood stain on your pants

- Haven't I seen you someplace before? - Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Male: I would die for you... Female: Prove it

- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

Im the demanding customer, your Dominos Pizza, I will make you Cum in 30 minutes or less.

"I lost my virginity! Can I have yours?"

Try to put your arm around her. If she pushes you away, then say: "Relax! Relax. I'll pay for the first abortion!"

Male: You are a Drugs? Female: Why? because your so addicted to me? Male: Nope, You ruined my life!

If i could rearrange the alphabet, id violate your ass hole.

-Do you come here often? -I'm about to.

Is there someone behind you? cause im seeing people behind your back

Him: Has anyone ever told you that you are absolutely beautifull...?? Her: (smiles) and says no.. Him: there is a good reaseon for that..

Would you like to come home with me you wetback spic?

my dick is 2 inches

Roses are red Violets are gold Get on your knees And do what your told


Guy: I lost my phone number, Can I have yours? Girl: Your phone service would help you get a new one.

At a ... PUB! Man: Hey... wanna... go out with a true shinob i ninja? ;) Woman: Are you not supposed to be invisible or something? Man: You can see me? SHIT! (runs away). Moral: So what if she saw you you are all covered in a pajamas anyways...

A blond, a brunette and a black haired girl are all stuck on an island....stupid women.

Woman: Quit staring at me and undressing me with your eyes! Man: I was just imagining you in a tasteful outfit.

Your eyes are the color of my toilet water.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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