"Don't scream"

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Girl: Go f**k yourself Guy: can you help me?

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he: hey,do you have a phone? she: yeah! why,do you want it? he: no,you should consider selling it and doing a plastic surgery with the money.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because I have a lot of family that lives there, maybe we're related.

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Hey girl, you a single mom I heard, I love that. Really? :D SURE! Hey just between us, how sexy are your kids on a scale from one to over nine thousand? Moral: Watch out ladies, I can only take care of so many of you... (you have kids? Meh, get lost,nothing personal, just you know... your kid)

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-My girlfriend and I want different things out of our relationship. -She wants marriage, children and a house. -I just want out.

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Girl: Hey classy older man, wanna get to know me better? Man: Sigh... sorry lady I am the man that played Gandalf in that... shitty lords of something movie... Girl: so what? Man: Sigh... you know.. Gandalf the white and Gandalf the gay...? Girl: Huh? Man: Ever seen the X-men? Girl: Yeah... Man: ONE WORD: FAGNETO! Girl: uh.. okay.. "leaves". Ian McKellen: Sigh... should have come out of the closet sooner...

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You are so beautiful. You look just like my dead wife. You can come back to my place and the 3 of us can get to know each other better.

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Damn, girl, you're hot... You look just like my mom.

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-Go on ,don’t be shy. Ask me out. -Okay, get out.

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Male: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put I and U togather Female: Oh really, because if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put F and U together.

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You are almost as beautiful as my mother.

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He: You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She: You are so handsome when you keep your mouth shut.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have some money, how much are you?

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Whats yo sign? Do not enter!

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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Do you believe in love at first sight or do I need to beat you again?

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Are those space pants? Cause there's not enough space in my house to fit your ass.

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Hey, I your dad a baker?...Cuz it would be really cool if he were a baker.

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Female: Hey can i buy you a drink? Male: I have AIDS.

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Man: Your body is a temple! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

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Man at bar: Hey girls... want my banana in your pajamas? ;) ;) ;) Girls: YEAH! Man: "thinks for himself..."... man I never get this reaction from girls.. you are a bunch of skanks and sluts... (leaves the bar) In the end, we are never happy with what we get are we? yeah... this is kinda the moral of this story... (Ps: My banana in your pajamas... I got a girlfriend, but someday Im gonna try that pick up line... hahahaha

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Boy: did it hurt when you fell from heaven Girl: I'm a antsiest

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Shall I compare you to a summer's day? Damn you're hot!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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