A polar bear and a penguin were taking a bath. The polar bear asked the penguin to pass the soap. the penguin responded by saying,"What do i look like a microwave?"

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Man: Yeah I have done it with thousands of women all around the world... THOUSANDS! Woman: Okay... then ill come home with you, I want an experienced man to be my first... At his house: Woman: I AM SCARED! Will it hurt? Its my first time and... Man: I dunno! I am scared as Its my first time too! :( Moral: A man whose is scared of sex... pfffffff!

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so... you're a girl,huh?

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guy: can i rape you? girl: No Guy: great that means any sex we have from now on is consensual, thanks

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Sickman Fraud: Hmm you look remotely alike my mother... Woman: Uh? Sickman Fraud: Yes fucking you should das probably give me some release, die reason to resist me is not necessary, you envy my pingas and I can assign it to you if you put on this ugly wig and yell "bad boy" whilzt I das fukte das rassenhol... Woman: OMG SICK! Moral: The father of modern psychology? Seriously?! I was going for a bachelor in psychology studies, but its just disgusting.

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It's not rape if you say "Surprise!"

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rohypnol. rape drug

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Roses are red, Violets are Blue, Dont talk to me, and I wont talk to you.

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- Hey baby! You make my heart beat. - Oh, well you make my stomach churn.

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-words can't describe how beautiful you are. -aaaawwwwwwww. -but numbers can. 3/10. -fffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-

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Can I have your number? -I don't have one.

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-Can I have your name? -Why? Don’t you already have one?

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-Go on ,don’t be shy. Ask me out. -Okay, get out.

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Can I go to your house and play with your Jigglypuff?

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How much does a whales weigh? How much? Just enough to make you look skinny.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm using my hand but thinking of you ;)

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*When you get her to your place* I'm just going to be honest. I've been on the FBI's most wanted list for quite some time now.

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Man enters a bar... ORIGINALITY FOR THE PEOPLE! Man: Hey, wanna go to my place later? Woman: Ok Ronald McDonald but you gotta take of your costume first and... Man: What costume? I am Michael Ja.. Moral: Stop it right there! Its too early for jokes about uh... Michael J Fox... yeah him yeah... lets keep it that way...

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im a serial killer So GTFO before i kill you

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Why was the little boy crying? Because he dropped his hamster in the garbage disposal

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Male: (Pulls Female in close, strokes her hair, and mutters 'My precious' over and over to himself)

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why was the girl stupid beacuse she had brain sergy

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He: Did you fall from Heaven? She: Well... He: 'Cos I got an erection. She: -__-

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you work at subway? cuz you givin me a footlong;)

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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