I'm heading back to my place. You want to come? Sorry, you strike me as a person who comes all by himself.

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when ilfe gives you lemons i squirt the jiuce in my eyes so i dont have to stare at you anymore :)

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Boy: Do you have a boyfriend? Girl: I don't have a boyfriend but I have a Girlfriend !

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Her: Guess what? Him: What? Her Yo Mama! Him: Is she that slut i did last night?

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Do you have a mirror in your pants, because it looks like you have a dick.

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- I'd go to the end of the world for you - Good,Stay There

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Lol, lucky you that this piece of shit site worked so fast for you huh DAD? Fine, I need no essay on her ass, my firm (well where I work at the top of the foodchain lets be modest here) sponsors all Samsung phones, so seriously ill get you the most expensive one I can find (its free, ill just tell them I need an extra one for, calling, but just for you, if you tell anybody else, ill just slash your tires. Man, I hate HATE sounding nice because I am not, but you can have that damn Fiat something (black car) that I bought from my ex, you take that instead? You still owe me the cash, but the car is yours (I never use it, and its you know... Bad, but still ten thousand times better than your car. Moral: Me? I just cant bother using my wives phone in order to call myself and find my own damn phone, so if you read this, you are golden. Oh, and if you want that piece of shit car of yours (cant even tell the brand can you? Seriously tell me) then you can have the damn money, but no paintjob, that car is, and must look like the trash it is. AMEN? Jk, Fuck Amen. Finally, so you want one with Keyboard attachment or one with keyboard embedded into the screen? The ones with the keyboards are usually a bit more pricey, but man, some of them suck ass, still I can get you like the one I got for business (yeah we gotta use fucking Samsung phones it pays well though) And forget your damn car tires, XD Im laughing here, some could steal those dirty flat pieces of shit, and you would be driving without noticing shit my whigga XD.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the car.

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Hey, we have coresponding genetailia, we should converge in sexual intercourse.

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Does anyone have a toothpick? I need to pick the crabs out of the cracks of my teeth.

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Keep it classy! Man: Hello mylady may I be as rude as to say you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen? Girl: Oh, wow I mean such class! Man: Yes you see, I am only asking... You see, would you mind a bit of some violent rapage? Girl: How dare you! Man: Oh I mean not be rude mylady, just a bit of torture and some few stylish cuts with my fancy knife? Moral: Whatever you do, whatever you want, KEEP IT CLASSY!

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Man: *Pokes Woman* Ouch! You burned me! Woman: How did I burn you? Man: Because you're just THAT hot. ;) Woman: *Pokes Man* Well it's too bad you're not.

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Guy: Do you like me? Girl: No Guy: ..... Girl: You didn't ask me if I loved you! Guy: Do you love me? :D Girl: No

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sHe; Theirs a "L" in love. he; and theirs a L in Lick my penis.

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Guy: Roses are red Violets are blue Girl:Violets aren't blue there violet... dumbass read a book

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Hey you should let me have sex with you! Why? Because I'm going to do it anyway!

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Do you believe in love at first sight or do I need to beat you again?

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Your so hot my pants will explode if I don't take them off now...

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If i don't have sex in 30 seconds i'll have to kiss you

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Guy: Hey want to hear a joke about my penis? No wait it's too long Girl: Hey want to hear a joke about my vagina? No wait you won't get it.

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He says "Where have you been all my life" She says "Hiding from you....how the hell did you find me?"

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-Hi Honey I'm home! -I'm not talking to you! -Oh, Okay. -Don't you want to know why? -No, I trust and respect your decision dear

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Hey girl, is your name Ethiopian food? Because your playing hard to get.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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