Guy: Hey babe, does the carpet match the drapes? Girl: How do you feel about hardwood?

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(boy gives flowers to a girl) Girl: Are these for me? Boy: Nope, I just want you to hold them for me for a second..

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-Hey baby, are you from Tennessee? Because you're like a solid 7.

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Hey baby, you must be a light switch, cuz every time I see you, you turn me on! Great! Maybe next time I'll electrocute you to death!

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Low confidence edition: Woman: Hi there cutie, you new here? Guy: Lady, believe me I am out of your league. Woman: You look really nice and I was wondering if... Guy: No really, believe me, I am boring and a virgin, but my mom says I am nice, but pfft no, just stop wasting your time and giving me false allusions please... Moral: Someone kill that faggot!

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-Eeeeeeeey girl how much does a polar bear weigh? -An adult male weighs around 350–680 kg (770–1,500 lb),[4] while an adult female is about half that.

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Girl, you must have fallen from heaven...because you're dead.

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Good news: you'll never-ever-ever have a zit again. Bad news: because there's no more space for it to pop out.

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Are you Jamaican? Because I love black women

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Male - Your a sight for sore eyes Female - And your a sight that causes sore eyes

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Are you a magnet, because i'm attracted to you. Yes, i am. So unless you want to have sex with metal, then i suggest you leave.

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- I can make your wildest dreams come true. - I know. I had this nightmare some creep wouldn't leave me alone...

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you look fap-fap-fap-fabulous

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put you and that other girl together.

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Hey babe, take a walk on the wild side. (;

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(this is only funny if ur a guy!) you go to a party im a man you get a drink im a man you laugh with friends im a man u see a hot chick im a man you invite her over to ur place im a man you go up in the bedroom im a man you go to pull her pants off im a man and she says... im a man!

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"Hey, I have the feeling i've seen you before somewhere..." "Well, could be, I used to be a porn actress.

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- Hey baby! You make my heart beat. - Oh, well you make my stomach churn.

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"Are you a parking ticket?" "What?" "You’ve got fine written all over you"

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For you thinking what is that shit below this comment? Go fuck yourself, for those that wonder why I typed that excellence, well read whatever... So why am I here once a year and type a lot of insanity here? Because I am quitting smoking... AGAIN. So after banging two chicks (one my wife STEAKSAUCE!) I just want a smoke right? RIGHT? To chill the adrenaline... My wife does not smoke (well if you can smoke cock then she is still the best smoker in town) Seriously, Tina has Prince... That explains her breath ugh... I am gonna get one anyways for great justice.

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He: did it hurt? She: when i fell from heaven? He: no. when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. go put some clothes on.

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Guy: Can I have your number ? Girl: We are six.

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Does this rag smell like chloroform?

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Wife: I have a confession to tell you my wife said to me one day... Before we got together I was raped by a masked man and I really liked it. Me: I know.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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