Man: So you will come home with me later? Girl: Sure! Man: Great then ill just go find more women I can bang later in the meantime... Moral: Depending of the kind of woman, this is of no consequence...

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GUY: are you trash? cuz i'd like to take you out friday night GIRL: are you trash? cuz you smell like it

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Do you believe in rape by first sight? Moral: I think its immoral enough as it is already.

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Hi I'm Shaniqua.

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*Boy looks at cloth* -Does this smell like chlorophorm?

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boy: hey wanna hang out some time?! girl: O MY GOD! r u hannah montanna?!

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"Hey did I not meet you at the singles and desperates club?"

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Ay Girl. Can I get yo digletts?

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-When you see the most beautiful girl ever, you take her next to a cliff, a manhole or whatever and you kick her off the cliff. Man: THIS IS SPARTA! Girl: Wow what a manly man! *dies* Moral: What? This is anti-pickup lines! And its not like you are gonna get the most beautiful girl ever anyways... Madness? THIS IS SPARTA!

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Girl - You smell nice, what have you got on? Boy - I have a hardon but i didn't think you could smell it.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because we are both in Tennessee and I thought asking where you grew up would be a good way to get to know you better.

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Male: You are a Drugs? Female: Why? because your so addicted to me? Male: Nope, You ruined my life!

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Boy:do you know to spell "Idiot" with just one word? Girl:how? Boy:U

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- Have we met? - Honey, we're not meeting now.

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Have you met Ted?

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I love Mark Wahlberg!

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guy: do you like sea food? girl: hell yes, I got crabs, would you like some

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Those pants are very becoming on you, of course if i were on you id be cumming too.

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You look like a dog... Wana bone?

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-Hi how are y... -just a minute, I need to drop a shit, be back in a sec.

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You want to sleep with me and i want to sleep with you. I'm at least half right.

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M: Hey bitch i'll give you £50 to touch my penis. f: Simon thats an afterschool detention M: SCORE!

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my love for you is like diarrhea. i can never hold it in

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I have one thing to say to all the woman who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!