roses are red violets are blue My dog gives me a bigger orgasm then you

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If you were homework, I would slam you on my table and do you all night long.

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"Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"

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"Are you a parking ticket?" "What?" "You’ve got fine written all over you"

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Man with huge arms and HUGE muscles enters a... pub! (for variety`s sake) "Hey you like fisting!" Woman: Yeah kinda.. I mean HOLY SHIT NO! I DONT PLEASE STOP NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH! Moral: Get a room you two! (a moral man original)

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Are you from Ireland cause my penis is dublin'

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The anti pickup line hard to believe: Woman: Me so hony! Me wan lose virginity to you! I make free love for hours! Man: Wow, are you that popular Asian supermodel known for her enormous tits? I heard you really are virgin! Damn I am single and all but I kinda promised my ex girlfriend I would help her get back together with the guy she cheated on me with. Woman: But me so hony! I wait for u for many many long time! But I wait for u only for a month is looong time! Man: Eh, I kinda promised I would fix her washing machine too, and then I have to cut her grandmothers toenails and... Anyways sorry I cant this month :( Moral: Yeah like that is ever going to happen! (then again I tend to expect too much)

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Man: Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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You must be tired because you've been running through my mind all day! ...I'm a paraplegic, asshole.

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Moral: Hey, how you doing? ;) Woman: Moral? Are you that guy that signs all his posts on horsecrapz network and adds miscellaneous notes? Moral: Yep that's me ;) Woman: OMG LIKE EWWW! Id never do you! Moral: Uh, when did even make such a suggestion? Moral:Well I am married...

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Baby, I love every muscle in your body... Especially mine.

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Boy-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until I heard that horrible pick-up line.

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Man: GET IN THE VAN! Woman: NO! Man: Well... How about the Limo? Its got beverages and caviar and... Woman: OOH :D Moral: Always go for the limo first,

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Man: Oh.. girl you smell so nice... Girl: TRY ANOTHER LINE AND STOP LOOKING AT MY TlTS LOSER! Man: Uh... I am blind... Girl: Um...

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun get in the van

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Ever had violent sex with a murderer/rapist? ;) ;)

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Hey, we have coresponding genetailia, we should converge in sexual intercourse.

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Hey baby, can I cream in your chocolate?

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Talk to me or I'll burn your face with this acid.

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I hope you like trees because I've got wood!

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He: Did it hurt? She: Aww when I fell from heaven? Thanks! He: No, when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. She:...

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rohypnol. rape drug

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Man: Your body is a temple! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

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- I would go to the end of the world for you. - Yes, but would you stay there, please?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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