GEDDINTHEFRIGGENCAR

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Guy: Hey baby, did you come by car? Girl: No I walked. Guy: Well I can make you come in mine.

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Man enters bar: Man: is there any... I mean ANY woman that would not instantly reject me here? If there is, I would like her... or in worst case scenario, HIM that she/he is very special to me and has the most beautiful eyes ever... THANK YOU

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I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium were going out and I was like O Mg.

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M: What's a pretty girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine? F: Running and screaming for help

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Superman: I bet I can bang you faster than the speed of light! Woman: OOOOH! OK DO IT! Superman... uh... I already did it 30 times already... "pant" "pant" Woman: uh... really? Uh... was I suppose to feel anythi... Moral: Since when has fast sex been good sex?

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-How much does a polar bear weigh? -It is impossible to know the exact weight of a polar bear where no scale or bear are present.

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Hey can I have your number? No.

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Are you a Geodude? Cause you're face is rockin'!

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Like my status for a tbh? Cause to be honest you are the prettiest girl I ever met ;) Like MY status for a tbh? cause to be honest, thats old and No one gets on Facebook. Twitter all the way :p Oh did I say prettiest? I meant b*tchiest you are horrible at comebacks. So your dumb too! -__________-

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Whats best about having sex with twenty six year olds?..... Theres twenty of them!

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can i austrailian kiss you, its like a french kiss but down under

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The word of the day is legs. Lets go to your place and spread the word

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- Do you wanna play the rape game? - NO! - That's the spirit!

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Girl! you are almost as awesome as horsehead network! Moral: I got balls of steel!

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"is that a ladder in your tights? or a fire escape for the crabs?"

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Him: Nice legs. What time do they open? Her: Members only, I'm afraid,

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-Hey babe, if you were homework, I'd do you on my couch, my table, and my bed. -Yeah? You just failed.

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You're one-in-a-million. That means there is roughly 7,000 people exactly like you in the world.

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Guy : Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Girl : No, why? Guy : Because I can totally see myself in your pants!

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Man: *Pokes Woman* Ouch! You burned me! Woman: How did I burn you? Man: Because you're just THAT hot. ;) Woman: *Pokes Man* Well it's too bad you're not.

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HE: You must have some hot buns. SHE: Yeah? HE: Cause you got a real butterface to go with them.

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-Hi miss are you a catchup? -hey is this some corny pick-up line?,,,okay fine. why? -because I want to dip my hotdog to you

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Guy: what do this pickup line and your face have in common? Girl: what? Guy: they are both poorly constructed.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!