Man: Wanna come see my collection of stamps? ;) Woman: Actually id prefer we go to your place have sex ;) Man: GEEEEEEEZ! What does a man have to do to show off his stamp collection here?

Man: Your body is a temple! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

-Adam, am I the only girl in your life? -Who else is there?

I'm a bad lover. I once caught a peeping tom booing me.-Rodney Dangerfield

Lol man, you know this man would never sue your ass, but... Man it takes a message here to see that you are like a super whigger. Anyway DAD! Thanks for the kind words, and seriously, you dont kiss ass on regular basis just one thing, you can reply wherever, text is cool You got the hots for your sister dude? I mean the deal was 50 uh words? Letters? Anyway its good, but DAD!... You know I never asked you to write anything about your sisters ass, its kinda weird DAD! Anyway, what do I judge, I banged my 7 years old sister back at the days where I still called her mom... Well she trained me, then I returned with the force, and now her husband kinda knows my deal and... I STILL BANG HER! <<<<< Anyway, man, keep the cash, I just wanted to show the world... Moral: Ladies and gentlemen, and this is how you make someone and anyone your bitch! Nothing personal DAD! You know that as far as I care, all my friends kneel before while my enemies are crushed under my mighty heel. Charisma... Kiddo, I know you are struggling with cash and stuff, but seriously, just for that one online, (your sisters story which id never ask you to go for helps) BUT If you have read this far (BECAUSE THE WORDS OF YOUR DARK OVERLORD ARE LAW) Then just send me a reply saying 666 and I will pay to fix whatever the hell is wrong with your car man, I cant stand the sound, and I know you can pay up, its just that times are down... ...For you. Actual code 999 (not satanist here, I hate all religion) post 666 and ill get someone to slice your tires instead.

I put the STD in STuD all i need is U!

ur so hot, i'd let u put ur vagina inside of me

-You smell nice Thanks....... -Have you ever thought of turning your sweat into perfume?

-Eeeeeeeey girl how much does a polar bear weigh? -An adult male weighs around 350–680 kg (770–1,500 lb),[4] while an adult female is about half that.

Girl are your parents Mexican, cuz you look Mexican.

Male: are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. Female: no, I'm from Idaho. Because I da ho.

boy - would you like to dance? girl - hell no! boy - I think you misunderstood me. I said you look fat in those pants. girl - That's why I said "Hell No!" girl - I'm trying to deny the fact that I look fat in my pants. boy - damnit! girl - Phew!

And then one day God invented man, the worlds third most useless invention. Moral: I cant stop laughing, thank you everybody I actually got top grades in sociology studies for this moral man crap XD

- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put I and U together. - Would you also change it so that I is an object, therefore making your previous sentence grammatically correct? And besides, I already organized the alphabet so that N and O are right next to each other.

Man: GET IN THE VAN! Woman: NO! Man: Well... How about the Limo? Its got beverages and caviar and... Woman: OOH :D Moral: Always go for the limo first,

Are you an erection? 'Cause you're growing on me.

Guy: Can I have your number ? Girl: We are six.

Female: You're hot! Male: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha get in the van.

So do you want tonight to be consensual or not?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I want to F*** you with a rake.

Man : Wanna go to my house tonight? Woman : I'm not sure if a rock can fit 2 people inside.

G: YOU KILLED MY FATHER! M: Yes yes I killed my father too, but you do not see me whining about it... M: So ... wanna date? I am quite the Male Bison in bed ;) G:NOOOOO! M: Just get in the damn plane! G: BISOOOOOOOOOOOON!

You are so beautiful. You look just like my dead wife. You can come back to my place and the 3 of us can get to know each other better.

- Is it hot in here, or is it just the broken A/C unit?

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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