I dont have sex on the first date - only if the opportunity comes

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Him: Has anyone ever told you that you are absolutely beautifull...?? Her: (smiles) and says no.. Him: there is a good reaseon for that..

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As original as it gets: Domestical... Dog with a top hat and monocle: Yap Yap! *wiggles tail* woof woof! Dog?: MEOW!! HISS! *scratches dog and throws her drink at his face or you know... something that increases dramatic tension* and leaves. Dog: HOWL! *whimpers* :( *throws top hat away* Moral: They say every dog has his day, but I do not think this relationship was never meant to work out :(

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—hey girl, how about you give me your phone number and I'll pay half of your order. —sure *passes a paper and paid for the things. The girl walked away* The boy flips open the paper "911, call my dad and ask for me"

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Man: Hello! I am SUPERMAN! And you are so hot you are my Kryptonite! Woman: then you better get lost before you die! Man: Uh well... yeah uh... walks away (in non super speed strangely) Moral: Think things trough sometimes...

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Guy: Hey baby, you must be a general, because you're making my PRIVATES stand at attention! Girl: Hmm..they're still a MAJOR disappointment.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and G and L and Y together because that is what you are.

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you know what rhymes with hug me LET'S HAVE SEX

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You're so hot that if someone threw a grenade at you, I'd probably throw it back becausemfalling on it sounds like a really dumb idea.

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Hey girl, is your name Ethiopian food? Because your playing hard to get.

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He says "Where have you been all my life" She says "Hiding from you....how the hell did you find me?"

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Guy: I believe in women's rights. That's what women deserve. Girl: Oh really? Because I was just gonna go make you a sandwich and get in bed with you, but I guess not...

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Girl: Go f**k yourself Guy: can you help me?

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all in all it was a good orgy

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-There's a 'U' in beautiful. -Yeah, and there's a 'U' in ugly.

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Man: Honey, I can't choose between watching golf or porn? Wife: Porn. You already know how to golf.

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- I know how to please a woman. - Then please leave me alone.

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- Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason - Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!

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- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

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Hey baby, you're really hot, I like girls with some meat for my bone.

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Does anyone have a toothpick? I need to pick the crabs out of the cracks of my teeth.

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"I prefer animals... but your so ugly you remind me of my dog"

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If you were a booger, I'd pick you first.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Go out with me Or you face'll be those colors, too!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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