Do you like a trimmed bush? Because I'm a gardener. Here's my business card, call me, seriously I need the work.

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-Hey baby,what's your sign? (; -Do not enter. >_>

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If you were a booger i'd pick you first. -that, is fucking disgusting.

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on a scale from 1 to 10, when did you lose your virginity?

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-Wanna have sex? -No -Damn

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I'm craving some bacon, wanna strip?

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Guy: Hi, I am sexually attracted to you. May I walk over to the bar and purchase you a drink and then another and then another untill you become intoxicated and more likely to allow me to have sexual intercourse with you? Girl: You speak funny. Get lost.

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Male: are you from Tennessee? Female: yes, why? Male: because Tennessee has great food. Do you think we could travel there together.

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My penis just died. Can I bury it in your ass?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm using my hand but thinking of you ;)

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-I heard you broke up :). -Yes, cookies to put in my ice cream!

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Did the lord take the thunder from the skies, and put it in your thighs?

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Glass Basketball

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Your body would look good in my trunk.

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Guy: Hey would you like to dance? Girl: No! Guy: Oh come on! Don't be picky. I wasn't!

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Eyh! its me Black Metal, I seriously cant pay you right now son! Sorry if this comes late this page do not work for shit, (I bet thats why you pick this page you egomaniac son, If you was not full of em charisma id never do this alright?) Okay Overlord, I got your message, hell you know my sister loves you crazy crazy man, why the hell would I try to "hold her away" I mean fuck its banging, so yeah thumbs ups man High five for my sister, its you know, she was super shy before you showed up, now she cant do gym anymore (haha man you so hardcore) but she has lots of friends and you know... So am I absolved now Overlord Black Metal? Moral: Because this guy made me put this, man, you making me feel like a total bitch, good play son!

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Guy: What're you doing Friday night? Girl: Not you.

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If you were a Pokemon I'd choose you!

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Man: Hi ladies I am back for more if you know what I mean ;) Ladies: Get lost you damn hippie! The seventies are over! Man: Whaaat? I died for your sins you know! Moral: Ever heard of Jesus`s ladyfriends? There, now you see what I mean.

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WOW MY LONGEST EVER COMMENT BELOW GOT A THUMBS UPS WOOT-WO-WO-WOROWOOOT *Partyravelights that confetti crap and... Moral: I dont really give a shit and all...

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Here, flowers for a pretty lady. These arent flowers they are leaves. Well you arent a pretty lady so hah!

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If you were a booger i would pick you Good thing you have no hands

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Your parents must be assholes...because you're the shit.

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Tonight might be a convienient night for us to have some intercourse.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!