- Hey, what do you do for a living? - Female impersonator

Are those space pants? Cause there's not enough space in my house to fit your ass.

-My girlfriend and I want different things out of our relationship. -She wants marriage, children and a house. -I just want out.

Man: There is a U and I in beautiful Woman: Ya, but there is only a U in ugly

At Barlevania: Man: Yo lady... mind if I hang around? Woman: Uh... wait... there is a weird song outside... Man: Yeah but you will you... yeah... its getting louder! *nana nanananana nana* Man: What the hell is that? Woman: No idea, its getting louder! *NANA NANANANANANA KATAMARI DAMACY NANA NANANANANANANA KATAMERUUUUU! DAMACY DAMACY*¨¨ *Both the man and the woman gets rolled up in a spirit ball by the prince, in no time the bar gets rolled up as well* Dun dun dun dun dun dun Du du dun dun STAAAAAARLIGHT STAAAAAAAARLIGHT STAAAAAAAARLIGHT STAAAAAAAAAAAR LIGHT! King of all cosmos: Eh.. buenos dias! That means good day in Spanish the king thinks... the king likes languages... Eh? What is this insignificant thing you rolled up? Earth? The king does not like it... it feels too earthy! To humanny and stuff... *The king of all cosmos throws the earth away towards outer space* "ROLLED UP EARTH HAS BECOME PLANET EARTH!" Moral: Katamari Damacy taught us all that it does not have to make sense to be funny, but its not a good idea to for anyone to hit on anything while the planet is being rolled up...

Roses are red, Violets are Blue, Dont talk to me, and I wont talk to you.

Are you a Potato? Because I love Potatoes.

Can I have this dance? Sure just give me a minute to load my gun

adam burdass

M: Wanna play dynamite? W: what's that? M: I lie on my back and you blow the sh** out of me.

The Non Moral method: "Hi I am the jack off all trades and master of none!" Moral: "Yo, I am the jack of no trades, and master of all!" So uh, Anti Pickuplines are pickup lines that do not work... Hmm, I think I get it... Hmm, no I don't...

I hope you like trees because I've got wood!

Female Police officer: Anything you say can and will be held against you. Me: Boobies.

Guy: I think I got lost in your eyes. Girl: Here's a GPS. Go find yourself.

M: Hey whats up? W: My Dick!

Guy for a girl with a dog: -Does the dog have a cell phone? -Why? is your mom in heat?

Male: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Female: did it hurt when they kicked you out of hell?

He: Let me be the reason you're up all night. She: You will be. I always wake up when I have nightmares.

-Insert man's line here- -Wanna get laid?- -TOTALLY!- -Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.-

Q: Why are Italian girls so hairy? A: Because it turns out its a genetic predisposition in which almost all males and females have when of the Italian ethnicity, these genetics are also parts of other race types.

I like your eyes. My eyes don't like you.

Tonight might be a convienient night for us to have some intercourse.

You have a laugh like my favorite porn star.

Lets play the Yes/No game the rules are you can only say yes or no once to the questions, No. 1 Are you beautiful?, No.2 Are you Lying?

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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