Handsome rich looking man: I would like to take you somewhere nice, maybe watch a movie at the cinema, then we could go to my place and have a romantic dinner.. finally... Girl: YES YES! Man: as I was saying... Finally I can make sweet love with your dog...if its fine by you... Girl: wtf?

Mom im sixteen and after watching some japanese cartoons and dads gone, I wonder if I can... Son please put your pants back on! But mom! Im the man in the house now, so I invited my friends so you and I can have a stamina sex contest and... Moral: If she does not tell you to put up your pants... Well, you are the man in the house son ;)

why was the girl stupid beacuse she had brain sergy

MAN- Wanna have sex? WOMAN- No get away from me you freak?!!! MAN- Well... I gave you a choice...

Hey baby, have you ever been to Uranus? No? Well I am about to.

My friends just bet me 50 dollars that I couldn't pick you up if I came over and spoke with you, would you like a few free drinks on their money?

Man: So you will come home with me later? Girl: Sure! Man: Great then ill just go find more women I can bang later in the meantime... Moral: Depending of the kind of woman, this is of no consequence...

showing people this http://hahgay.com/ p.s after seeng any girls want to come back to my place

-My girlfriend and I want different things out of our relationship. -She wants marriage, children and a house. -I just want out.

Your body would look good in my trunk.

Did you just fart coz you're blowing me away!

Hi, since its our first "Set Time Date" , I want you know I haven't got any STD's

Five dollar women... WOO!

Boy: does your face hurt Girl: No. Why Boy Because it sure is hurting me

Hey girl, I just fixed your pipes, I got a pipe of my own that needs some fixing if you know what I mean ;) Moral: Pornography is a lie.

-You look like a dream. -Go back to sleep.

- Hey, baby, what's your sign? - Do not Enter

the roses were red and the violets were nice but if you want to get with me you better up the price

He: You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She: You are so handsome when you keep your mouth shut.

What's the difference between a Jew and a boyscout? The boyscout returned from camp.

Hey, I your dad a baker?...Cuz it would be really cool if he were a baker.

HELLO I AM BORAT! MISHIMUSH! I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE THE MOVIE OF MAKING THE RAPE OF THE AMERICAN WOMAN! WILL YOU HELP US? Woman: NO!!!!!! Oh... ok Mishimush! We make the other Movie then, BORAT THE CRUSHINGS OF AMERICA.

He: Did you fall from Heaven? She: Well... He: 'Cos I got an erection. She: -__-

Hold me pint love i'm going for a dump.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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