Do you want to see something swell?

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Guy: are you AT&T because you are raising my bar Girl: Sorry I use Verizon. it has better 4G coverage

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why was the girl stupid beacuse she had brain sergy

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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-Roses are red, violets are... -SHOW ME YOUR TITS

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Him: I'd go through anything for you. Her: The exit's over there.

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Do you believe in love at first sight or do I need to beat you again?

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For Christmas I got some toy soldiers, To play with when I'm in bed, But I got bored with my seargents and majors, So I played with my privates instead.

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A 85 year old man was at a bar, he goes up to the first hot thing he sees and asks do I come here often?

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- OMG, OMG, OMG, Terry finally said he will go out with me! -OMG, When? -February 30th! -Stacey, There is no February 30th.

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You remind me of America. How so? Because you so fat!

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-Hey, I lost my number. Can I have yours? -No.

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Can I have this dance? Sure just give me a minute to load my gun

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Man, stay alive, I dont even got time to read that shit. See you around son.

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Skilled man enters a bar: Man: Lady, I am a scientist... Lady: So? Man: I also have black belt in several martial arts... Lady: Your point? Man: uh... I have uh... Lady: Sigh... *gets up and leaves* Moral: Knowing what and how to be attractive to women is an art on its own...

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Man: Wow girl, you are so hot you remind me of my wife when she was young.. wanna come to my place for a quick one before she comes back? Girl: Sigh... this AGAIN? I told you! If you are gonna get that drunk, get out of our home and go to a bar daddy!

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Is there a mirror in your pocket?... Because if so, you should probably take it out and, uh, fix what you have going on there.

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the roses were red and the violets were nice but if you want to get with me you better up the price

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-Hi how are y... -just a minute, I need to drop a shit, be back in a sec.

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The word of today is "leg's",no whom are i kidding, bird is the word!

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hey girl, whats your sign? slippery when wet.

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'U' and 'I' together. - No, it's okay. 'N' and 'O' are already together.

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If you and I were squirrels, I'd bust a nut in that hole.

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Guy: Where have you been all my life? Girl: In my room hiding from you.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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