are u an angle because i have a boner oh what fail

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Guy- Hey girl do u like math Girl-um, sure Guy- ok I got a problem... Add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and multiply the bodies.... What does that equal.... Girl- u and ur homo friends

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girl: i like you boy with downs: i liek trains

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adam burdass

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You are the personification of beauty. ,..Wanna Shag?

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Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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can i take a dump in your mouth?

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You are so beautiful. You look just like my dead wife. You can come back to my place and the 3 of us can get to know each other better.

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Did it hurt? When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down?

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun get in the van

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Have you ever heard of World of Warcraft?

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Q: What did Tommy do when it was time to go to bed? A: Go to bed. Q:What did Tommy do when it was time to wake up? A: Kill him self.

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Mom im sixteen and after watching some japanese cartoons and dads gone, I wonder if I can... Son please put your pants back on! But mom! Im the man in the house now, so I invited my friends so you and I can have a stamina sex contest and... Moral: If she does not tell you to put up your pants... Well, you are the man in the house son ;)

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Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

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Q: How did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

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Did it hurt? Did what hurt? When you fell from heaven.. and crushed all the people below (for a fat girl)

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Girl:Want to go out this Friday? Boy: No I like to stay inside. Girl: No I mean are you free this Friday? Boy:No Im expencive!

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- Hey, baby, what's your sign? - Do not Enter

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HELLO I AM BORAT! MISHIMUSH! I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE THE MOVIE OF MAKING THE RAPE OF THE AMERICAN WOMAN! WILL YOU HELP US? Woman: NO!!!!!! Oh... ok Mishimush! We make the other Movie then, BORAT THE CRUSHINGS OF AMERICA.

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What do you do for a living?" "I'm a professional athlete." "Oh really? What sport do you play?" "Golf.

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with glue? My d***

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Violets are blue. Roses are red. Your window was open. I'm under your bed.

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Are you a dinosaur? Because you look like you got hit by an asteroid.

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Female: Hey do you wanna buy me a drink? Male: I really don't like your face.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!