Why did the small girl run away? She saw her own coqu in the mirror.

-Your eyes like diamonds, they give me hope. -Your eyes are like coal, they do nothing for me. Now please go away.

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You look like I could use a drink - SMC Digital

roses are red, violets are blue, my toe hurts.

Male: If you were a booger, I'd pick you first. Female: If you were an ass, I would kick you first.

Keep it classy! Man: Hello mylady may I be as rude as to say you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen? Girl: Oh, wow I mean such class! Man: Yes you see, I am only asking... You see, would you mind a bit of some violent rapage? Girl: How dare you! Man: Oh I mean not be rude mylady, just a bit of torture and some few stylish cuts with my fancy knife? Moral: Whatever you do, whatever you want, KEEP IT CLASSY!

Are you from Tennessee? Because your accent sounds stupid.

Man: Do you want to have sex at my house Women: No

BOY-i love you GIRL-(sneezes) sorry im allergic to bullshit

guy: hey do you know how to sly a dragon? girl:No. guy: well your no help.

I have the smallest erected dick in town, if you don't believe me ask my mama!

At a bar: Hello! Moral: Keep the damn lines short! (A moral man original, not to be confused with the exploding bar or whoever put morals in their sstories, feel free to do so though! I mean anyone can see from the quality whose are mine ;)

Are you from Tennessee? Youre the only 10 i see, and im 59. I bet we could 69 beautifully.

Is your dad a terrorist?? 'Cause you're a sex bomb.

Is there a mirror in your pocket?... Because if so, you should probably take it out and, uh, fix what you have going on there.

Him: Did it hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Him: Breaking through the earth's crust ascending from hell.

Guy: Do you have a mirror in your pocket... Girl: Why? Because you can see yourself in my pants, I've heard that before. Guy: No, I want to check how I look before I go over and talk to your sister.

Did it hurt when you burst through the concrete emerging from hell? Yes, yes it did.

-Hey comon baby dont be shy give me a little BlowJob -sorry im alergic to peanuts....

At the library: So girl, how about we find a nice quiet place? Moral: Location, location...

The power to type any pointless superpower at the wrong place... ...shit...

- Your place or mine? - Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.

-hey girl, you must be a pirate cause you got a lot of booty

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!