If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd probably leave it as is, seems to be working OK just fine without my internvention. And imagine the work it'd create in terms of all the re-filing alone. Librarians would have apoplexy, and if I came out I was responsible..well, there'd be hell to pay. No, thank you, but no thank you, the alphabet can stay as it is, no matter how hot your body.

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"Hey baby, how do you like your eggs in the morning?" "Unfertilized."

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If your happy and you know it clap your hands!! What if I lost my hands in Nam while I was singing this song and a plane killed my friend causing me to ct off both of my hands?

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- Do you wanna play the rape game? - NO! - That's the spirit!

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- Haven't I seen you someplace before? - Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.

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Did you gain weight? Because I think your gravitational pull towards me just increased.

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Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

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Man: Are you a beach? Cause I'm sure there's a lot of crabs crawling around down there

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Damn you look good in beer goggles.

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Husband: I will always get breakfast and newspapers in bed AT 5:30 baby, but not wake me when you wake up at 4:30

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Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Guy: When you ascended from the depths of hell and broke through the earth's crust?

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- I think i lost my number, can i have yours? - I think i lost my number too.

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"Can I buy you a drink or do I have to have sex with you first?"

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Black dude at bar: HERE COMES THE COLE-TRAIN BABY! WANNA RIDE! Girl: So I assume your name is Cole right? Dude: Uh... actually no but... WAIT! where are you going!

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He-Are you from Tennesse? Still He-Cu'z I wanna suck ur face off..

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have some money, how much are you?

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That King that said: Kill all male babies... Lets say he was a teenager? Moral: Excellent job son, but you see, sharing is caring, have a victory drink!... Thing is... I don't care... rest well...For eternity... Hughman Heffer... The seed has been sown... you got nothing on me...

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Guy: Are you looking for a hot, sexy, fertile young man? Girl: No thanks, I used to be one.

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Ay Girl. Can I get yo digletts?

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-Hey babe, wanna go to my place and bang all night long? -No you freak. -Well, I gave you a choice.

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-Can I buy you a drink? -Go ahead, but only if you buy my boyfriend one too!

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GUY: are you trash? cuz i'd like to take you out friday night GIRL: are you trash? cuz you smell like it

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Does this rag smell of chloroform to you?

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GET IN THE VAN!!!

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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