- Anti-Pickup Line

Guy: So do you wanna come over to my place? Girl: Not really but thanks for the offer.

You're parents must be assholes because baby you're the shit!

-Did it hurt? When you fell from Heaven? -Are you implying that I'm satan?

Young Man: Mom.. oh mom I want you so bad! Mom: I want you so bad too son! (starts ripping of clothes) Young Man: Uh... I want you to make me a sandwich... what is going on? Mom: Uh... never mind... Next day: Mom: Hey I bought you some cartoons... Young Man: Huh? I am too old for carto... HEY! :D what is this? What is this Hentai stuff? OOH! Moral: Hentai, the reason asians are smart and families stick together in Japan... sometimes they literally stick together...

A couple wanted to try something different in the bedroom, The wife suggests they do it in a 69 position so they get into position but the wife lets one off in the husbands face she apologises and they try again when the wife farts again the husband gets up to leave and says no I don't think I can do this another 67 times!

-Did you fall from heaven? Because your an angel -No but did you? Because your face is fucked up!

hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

my girlfriend is really insecure about her weight so much so that I'm thinking about detaching the reverse alarm

Guy : your looking well! Girl: awh thanks Guy: You must have shaved this morning.....waaaaaay

“I've been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you.” (Groucho Marx)

Roses are red violets are blue this isn't a poem I'm a botanist.

Drink this!

You must be tired... I assume you are because I am after following you on your four mile run through the park today.

He: Hey bay wanna danc- She: Leave.

-What's your favorite color? -bl... -mine too! Let's f***

Hello my name is Pogo. Would you like to jump on my stick?

Sigh, reminds me I am banging a girl named Tina, and one named Line right? Plus my wife whose name I wont reveal because she matters (Line, Tina, you do not!) Anyway, when people ask me "what the hell was that noise Nero (No idea what Neronism is, fuck him for stealing my name) I tell them "meh I was just screwing Line and Tina" People always go like... Man... YOU DONT HAVE TO LIE TO ME SON! YOU GOT STREET CRED HERE MODAFOCA! Tina and Line? You cant come up with better names SON? EH? If you wanna lie to me again SON, Then you get some original names SON! And I go like... So, can your sister sit down now? And he goes all like SHEET, was that you? Nice score man! And then I went "thats your sister you know that right?" Anyway, you want me now? INSTA ANTI PICKUPLINE... BECAUSE WHO NEEDS PICKUPLINES AT ALL! I AM JUST BEING MEEEEEEEEEEE! AND YOU MIGHT HATE ME!!!!!!! BUT YOU WOMEN STILL END UP TALKING ABOUT HOW YOU HATE THAT GUY YOU FUCKED LAST NIGHT! AND YOUR GIRLFRIENDS! Man... I need another Smoke... SMOKE WINS FAILTALITY. Ps: Yo Harris, stop congratzing me for banging your sister, she is not a nice catch for youz! She is your sistah DUDE! STOP GIVING ME THE THUMBS UPS EVERYTIME SHE COMPLAINS HER ASS IS STILL SORE... I mean does he get it? Or does youz congrats me because you dont understand that Rebecca your "innocent" sister is really into anal something I usually just reserve for the... actually good girls...

Q: What did Tommy do when it was time to go to bed? A: Go to bed. Q:What did Tommy do when it was time to wake up? A: Kill him self.

Gaywatch starts

M: Woah I am drunk baby... But I gotta say... you`re the hottest bitch in town! B: Bark bark!

Roses are red Violets are blue Go out with me Or you face'll be those colors, too!

so... you're a girl,huh?

As long as I have a face, you will always have a place to sit.

Male: What's on your mind? Female: How bad you must be at sex.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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