- Anti-Pickup Line

Man: Yeah I have done it with thousands of women all around the world... THOUSANDS! Woman: Okay... then ill come home with you, I want an experienced man to be my first... At his house: Woman: I AM SCARED! Will it hurt? Its my first time and... Man: I dunno! I am scared as Its my first time too! :( Moral: A man whose is scared of sex... pfffffff!

Yeah... you'll have to do.

Flipping a coin to give you my number or not to give you my number

I AM FAGNETO! WELCOME TO GAY!

"Are you a parking ticket?" "What?" "You’ve got fine written all over you"

roses are red, violets are blue, i have some money, how much are you?

Nielsen: Nice beaver! Woman: Thanks! Nielsen: No I mean you have a nice p*ssy Woman: Ah! Thank you! (cat meows) Nielsen: No I mean you have a nice wet vagina. Woman: Is this in the script? Director: CUT! Nielsen: What? Cant a man improvise? I mean OJ does it, and he is quite the nice fella... Moral: "Quite the nice fella" Yeah reminds me of good old dad, nice to everyone, and could take a lot of shit, but as much as I asked him how he was doing, I got an uppercut to the face and a nice trip in a ambulance... Started when I was 4, I crushed his upper Jaw in self defense when I was 16... ah... hmm... Why am I sharing this? Then again why not... When have I not spoken my mind.

"Hmm...you'll do."

Wow! You know, your eyes are like blueberries, wait, can I actually, can I actually, I'm kinda hungry, can I, can I have them?

Woman- is your penis erect? Male- no just FULL SIZED Woman- woah

It that a tsunami in your panties or are you excited to see me.. :)

Guy: Roses are red Violets are blue Girl:Violets aren't blue there violet... dumbass read a book

Yeah you got me there dude, you really got my bragging rights... I am here with some "just" (nothing special) friend of my wife, that is wearing me out as she wont get off my Swagger, but while mentioning it like this makes me just as depraved as her... Gotta say, woman pleading me to get jumping on my cock, while my wife makes us breakfast... ...Im done being the king, im a fucking God. Anyway, "Eriksen" (you know who I mean) is pissed at me because I was supposed to be at work, and he apparently spends time here looking for me when he knows I am getting down and... Man this woman needs the cock... I mean at this rate she will bang me to death... ...But what a way to go. But seriously, would I really be at work, and allow you to come get my/now your car from garage whose walls are so paper thin that the police and securitas would be on your ass if I was not at least nearby? (well securitas are lazy, but as a lawyer, I benefit from suing them... Again) There are like eight alarms there, and you so gangsta you would get jailed. UPDATE: Punches, not slaps, remember the guy who punched that sweet chick when he got drunk, and then you punched me down and I got up and broke your jaw? Yeah that shit stings still, Five punches, at any time (no haymakers hey, I know my haymakers/uppercuts) but you take five punches... The fuck am I talking to, whigs is here already... Moral: I wont just write this shit just to make it all disappear with a delete button, fuck, im a super sayan!

Roses are red violets are blue i got a gun get in the van!

Do Your feet hurt? Cause youve been stomping on my dreams for 3 years now

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When a tractor fell on your face?

him: why are you so gorgeous? her: i dont know i guess my parents had some really good sex.

Mirrors can't talk, luckily for you they can't laugh either

-how much do i have to pay you to **** me? -how much do i get for taking you back to the zoo?

- If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. - Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

G: YOU KILLED MY FATHER! M: Yes yes I killed my father too, but you do not see me whining about it... M: So ... wanna date? I am quite the Male Bison in bed ;) G:NOOOOO! M: Just get in the damn plane! G: BISOOOOOOOOOOOON!

You're like a can of condensed milk. Short, thick, and sweet.

I'm your Edward and your my Bella

Hey wanna have sex and get married! ......... sorry.......

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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