- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

I asked my friend who the prettiest girl in here is, and he told me to ask you because you seemed more familiar with everyone here.

If we were confronted, by a vicious man-eating bear with chain-saws for hands and fangs, holding a hammer; than I would sincerley hope you wouldn't be harmed because you're pretty.

Hey chicks! I am a very experienced suicide bomber, I was even in the plane that blew up the world trade center A ;) ¨ Moral: This must be the worst pickupline ever for oh so many reasons on so many levels...

Man - "Does this smell like chloroform to you?" Woman - "Yes it does."

male- are you from Tenessee female- why? am I the only ten you see? male- no, i was just going to say you look a little inbred.

Losers pick-up sex guide. 1. Create a beautiful environment at home, with candles, romantic music, etc. 2. Buy lube, some sexy female underwear, a couple of sex toys, some erotic magazines to excite you`re partner. 3. Pick-up you`re stuff and masturbate.

sHe; Theirs a "L" in love. he; and theirs a L in Lick my penis.

roses are red violets are blue My dog gives me a bigger orgasm then you

-hey baby whats your sign? -no parking anytime

Are you a parking ticket? Cause you got fine written all over you.

Hey baby, you're really hot, I like girls with some meat for my bone.

A polar bear and a penguin were taking a bath. The polar bear asked the penguin to pass the soap. the penguin responded by saying,"What do i look like a microwave?"

Him. "I'd sure like to get into your pants." Her. "No thanks. One asshole in my pants is my limit."

Im like a thief and ill steal your virginity!

If i could rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and G and L and Y together because that is what you are.

You're too easily offended. I cannot believe you said that.

Sung to the melody of Ozzy`s: "Moral Man" HEES THE MORAL MAN, IIIS HEE MORAL OR IS HE DEAD? HEES THE MORAL MAN AAARE THERE MORALS INSIDE HIS HEEAD. Moral: NOOO THERE ISNT! ONLY IMMORAL INSIDE! AND ILL KEEP POSTING, ONLY TO CRUSH YOUR INSIDES! guitar solo begins

I dont have sex on the first date - only if the opportunity comes

Him: What's it like in Hell? Her: Why are you asking me that? Him: Because you're the devil and I know where the f*ck you came from; I can see you're horny.

Billy Hill: Man...THAT WAS GOOD SEX! I am glad I did not just bring one of those bitches that I usually drag home, your great Currie... great pussy! Ok Currie time to go home! Currie: meow... Moral: And you think that by bitches he meant bad women ahahahahha... BIlly Hill! Ring a bell nao?

The word of the day is 'legs'. Wanna come to my place and spread the word?

M: You make me wanna be a terrorist! W: Why? M: I so wanna blow on you right now...

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book