Hey wanna have sex and get married! ......... sorry.......

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Man seriously? Free Samsung? And that Fiat, I been wondering how much you want for it, not that i got it but I was considering buying it sometime. Son, I got no idea what brand this piece of shit car is, but the wheels are cool. No really, if you mean it, ill take that Fiat man, man, ill kiss your feet, ill do it, no really I mean Really? I mean really really? Man If you mean it, ill get over there right away, and man, you can have dunno, bad times, hell ANYTHING Okay? But if you are just messing with me, you can go fuck yourself and your phone man!

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Guy: Have you ever been to Thailand? Girl: No Guy: Well maybe I should take you to Bangkok

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My therapist says I should meet new people.

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-What`s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar? -What`s it like being the biggest liar in the world?

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EVERYONE ELSE

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-- Hey, can I have your number? -- 12

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On your mark, get set, suck my dick.

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hello my name is pogo would you like to jump on my stick?

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Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's my number, so shove it up your A$$.

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- Hey, baby, are your parents retarded because you're pretty special.

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Hey nice shoes....Wanna F***?

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Hey baby, do you play soccer? Because I think I'm gonna score tonight. ... Well, you can't score if the player ain't no good.

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Do your parents have Down Syndrome? Because your really special.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have a mac10. GET IN THE VAN.

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Guy: Thanks Girl: Why? Guy: Cuz you made me get rid of that boner

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If I could rearrange the alphabet i would pass on it.

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Man: If I ask you to go on a date, would the answer to that question be the same as the answer to this one? Woman: (pause) Rape!

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-You look like a dream. -Go back to sleep.

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Wow...you don't sweat much for a fat girl.

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Guy: Hey is your dad a jeweler? Girl: No, He died a year ago due to a heart condition.

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-ILY -Aw. Spell it out it will make it more special. -I'm Leaving You

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Shall I compare you to a summer's day? Damn you're hot!

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Hey baby, my name is Richard Gozinia. But my friends call me Dick. Dick Gozinia.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!