Man: Hey sweetie, can I take you home tonight? Girl: No thanks, my dad's gonna be here any minute.

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you know what rhymes with hug me LET'S HAVE SEX

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- I want to give myself to you. - Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.

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Have you heard of that new movie "Other People"? Cuz thats what i wanna see.

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause the ground around you looks like it's cracked.

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Guy: Is it hot in here or did i just break the ice? Girl: No, it was your weight.

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Guy: Hey would you like to dance? Girl: No! Guy: Oh come on! Don't be picky. I wasn't!

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He: Did it hurt? She: Aww when I fell from heaven? Thanks! He: No, when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. She:...

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-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? -I'm an atheist.

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- Hey, I have 40 minutes to live and need to feel the touch of a woman to live. -I'm a dude.

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Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

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whats your name beautiful? ;) Tony... (silence)

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Guy: Have you ever been to Thailand? Girl: No Guy: Well maybe I should take you to Bangkok

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man: wanna know how i know we're going to f**k tonight? woman: how? man: cuz im stronger than you!

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You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear

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Where have you been all my life?! Said the 78 year old alzheimers patient to his teary eyed wife of 50 years.

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MAN: You wanna know what's beautiful? Read the first word again. WOMAN: You wanna know what's desperate? Read the first word again!

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I've got a black belt in lovin'.

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I'll never forget the day I swept you off of my feet.

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Man enters bar and does a lot of magic tricks, all the prettiest women are extremely impressed: Girls: WOW! We would do anything to see more of that! Guy: Uh... damn I forgot what to do after this... Moral: Screw the game man, its a stupid book, just be your moronic self and someone will like you for the lovely disgusting moron that you are... by the way you lost the game :D

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And then it hit me.....no really now I'm bleeding

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Man: Is your name sherly? Woman: No... Man: because id like to Fuc* you in the ass and call you sherly

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Roses are red violets are blue this isn't a poem I'm a botanist.

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At bar Man: Uh... um... wanna come home see my star wars board games collection? Woman: SURE! Man: *Heart attack*

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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