Man: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven? Woman: Did it hurt when they kicked-- *sound of gun clicking* Woman: Thanks!

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Wanna have sex?

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I thought I was ugly, but then I met you

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I'll punch ya!

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If I could rearrange the period table, I would put Uranium and Iodide together ;)

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What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

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Do your parents have Down Syndrome? Because your really special.

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Are you an erection? 'Cause you're growing on me.

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Male: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Female: did it hurt when they kicked you out of hell?

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Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Sorry i only sleep with dead bodies.

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MAN: hey babe, do think that mabye someday I and U will be next to each other in the alphebet? WOMAN: well N and O are already, sooo.....

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- Lets get outta here and have some fun - If you got your fathers dick....no

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girl, are you a christian? Sure... Do you believe in me? I dont even know you! Well, met God? No? You love him!

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Boy:Nice hair Girl: (removes the wig) there you go! have fun

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That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, I'd be coming too.

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-Do your feet hurt? Because I couldn't help but notice you look about 75 pounds overweight and I hear that is rough on your feet.

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-So...wanna come back to my place? -I Dont Know If two people can fit in a box on the street.

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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HI, DO YOU KNOW WHY THEY CALL ME DOCTOR RABBIT THE HYMEN DESTROYER? Nero the clit collector: Actually this works pretty good, just wear a random rabbit costume, cut a hole where your CAWCK is, and make sure they are girls under twelve or below (because it kinda loses its meaning with little boys but fuck it anyways, yeah fuck it! FUCK IT TO THE LIMIT!) I work at a daycare center: Because I care.

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-Insert man's line here- -Wanna get laid?- -TOTALLY!- -Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.-

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Guy: Can we go on a date? Girl: A date? You couldn't find a date if I handed you a bag of fruit!

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Me: Have you ever dreamed, of owning a thousand sparkly gems? Woman: No why? You got some? Me: No, but now but now we can dream together t under the sparkling stars under the sky... Moral: Hey, she said aww... And touched my hand before chatting with her friend... and as I turned my hand... was a piece of paper, with a written number...

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M:HEY BABY! Where you from? W: Im a lesbian.. M: COOL! So which part of Lesbia are you from?

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Guy: want to hear a joke about my penis. don't worry, it's too long Girl: want to hear a joke about my vagina. don't worry, you won't get it

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!