- Hey do you wanna hang out? - I'm 17.

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He: Hey bay wanna danc- She: Leave.

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Male: Do you know if there is an airport around here? Cause my heart took off, when I saw you... Female: Yeah? Well my heart crashed in the Hudson River when I saw you!

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Man: Lady... Seriously, I got a PhD! Woman: Seriously, you look more like an athlete, in what? Man: Lady... I got a pretty huge Richard. Moral: RICHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDS!

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Man: Your so hot, i think heavens missing an angel Girl: ... Man: ... Girl: ... Girl 2: Sophie turn your hearing aid on Man: oooh.

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You're like chocolate pudding. You look like crap.

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Hi, since its our first "Set Time Date" , I want you know I haven't got any STD's

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G: YOU KILLED MY FATHER! M: Yes yes I killed my father too, but you do not see me whining about it... M: So ... wanna date? I am quite the Male Bison in bed ;) G:NOOOOO! M: Just get in the damn plane! G: BISOOOOOOOOOOOON!

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A cat falls into a pool and a rooster laughs. Moral of the story, a wet p**** makes a happy c***

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What do u get when u mix a black a guy and an octopus The best dam cotton pickin machine you'll ever see!

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Your parents must be assholes...because you're the shit.

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Hey, you want a ride?

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As long as I have a face, you will always have a place to sit.

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when ilfe gives you lemons i squirt the jiuce in my eyes so i dont have to stare at you anymore :)

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Him: Breaking through the earth's crust ascending from hell.

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Hey are you on your period? Because I've been following you and I've noticed there's a blood stain on your ass...

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Are you a dementor? Cause you take my breath away.

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I have never dated a horse-faced woman before :)

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He: pick a number between 1 and 10 Her: 8 He: you lose take your top-off!

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WOMAN! GO MAKE ME A SANDWICH NOW! Girl: But I do not even know you!? Man: Oh... uh.. hi sexy.. wanna get to know me?

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Are you an erection? 'Cause you're growing on me.

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For you thinking what is that shit below this comment? Go fuck yourself, for those that wonder why I typed that excellence, well read whatever... So why am I here once a year and type a lot of insanity here? Because I am quitting smoking... AGAIN. So after banging two chicks (one my wife STEAKSAUCE!) I just want a smoke right? RIGHT? To chill the adrenaline... My wife does not smoke (well if you can smoke cock then she is still the best smoker in town) Seriously, Tina has Prince... That explains her breath ugh... I am gonna get one anyways for great justice.

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Women love it when you kiss their neck. Just not while they are driving and while you're in the back seat and when they don't know you...

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you work at subway? cuz you givin me a footlong;)

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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