-If you are looking at a girl and she says What are you looking at? -I thought you were good looking, but I was mistaken.

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-Did you just fart? Cause you blew me away.

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

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Would you like to be the lone mother of my children?

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You must have a large mass because i am highly attracted to you

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Hey lady, you're really, really cute! Let's go out in the woods, GET NAKED and have sex!

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ANYWAY... I have been married for around X years right? (My wife is anon because reasons valid reasons!) And I told my wife "Babe, you know what you got married into baby, how about you and I consider having a third one in the bed... No not a guy, thats disgusting, you agree? Awwride! So anyways, she was like "Uh... Ask me again in a year I need to think things trough, and I want you for myself..." Next week we was fucking my new (back then neighbor) which is 28 or whatever (I dont remember my neighbors name BAHAHA (actual laugher)... Peeps, say what you want about me, ill be the one fucking the prom queen tomorrow... And you know, maybe someone else, sex with more than my waifu the prom queen is addictive, I mean sharing (salive, cum juices) is caring right? Okay, I better stop here, Rebecca (SHADDAP AUTOCORRECT ITS HOW HER NAME IS SPELLED... I guess) is upset... No not because I am typing this, but because I am out here freezing my ballz off smoking her ciggs... Man The great stuff about "decent equipment" is that I dont need all that much energy, just the speed to keep the girls screaming!

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Are those space pants? Cause there's not enough space in my house to fit your ass.

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I am terribly sorry for talking to you, but I was wondering if...

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Man: Hi ladies I am back for more if you know what I mean ;) Ladies: Get lost you damn hippie! The seventies are over! Man: Whaaat? I died for your sins you know! Moral: Ever heard of Jesus`s ladyfriends? There, now you see what I mean.

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You're like a drug to me. why because I'm so addicting?:) No, because you ruined my life.

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Batman bravely leaps in front of the Robin: Bats: WATCH OUT FOR THAT GAY-RAY! *Bats suddenly grabs Robin and starts making out with him* Bats: I am sorry, I cannot stop it... I... Robin: I am underage so maybe it was a pedo-ray or something... Joker: What gay ray? What pedo ray? It was suppose to disintegrate you! But whatever, I win. Moral: It was a looong trip back home.

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HEY BITCH! GET YOUR ASS HOME AND GIVE ME A THUMBS UPS AT HORSEHEAD NETWORK! Moral: And be rewarded ;) (unless you are fucking ugly, then you still get the gift of voting me whatever way you want)

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Boy: Is your mom mexican? Girl: No/Yes why? Boy: Just wondering.

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-Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots? -Sorry, I don't date outside my species.

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I hate you already.

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You're place or mine? Both, you go to yours and I go to mine.

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Male: Paper or plastic? Female: What? Male: Paper or plastic, you know, to put over your head.

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-Did it hurt -What when i fell from heaven? -No when you fell from the ugly tree and hit every single branch on the way down

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Guy: So how about that Tom Cruise??? Guy: ... I'm in the wrong type of bar...

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- Your body is like a temple. - Sorry, there are no services today.

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"Do you have a map? I'm getting lost in your eyes." "They always say that before they go to sleep."

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- I may not be a genie, but I can make your dreams come true. - First wish: don't speak ever again.

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-I work for the FBI -Oh I work for the CIA, maybe we'll see each other at a meeting -Yeah I'm in the Female Body Inspector division -I'm in the Can the Idiot Absent himself division

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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