-Are you free anytime soon? -No. I'm very expensive

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Nice hair, can I pull it?

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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Man: Your tag's showing. It says "Made in Heaven". Woman: *Proceeds to leak period blood into a puddle at the man's feet and walks away in silence*

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Excuse me lady, may I say that you got wonderful hands? Aww please yes. Would you like a drink my buy? Please :D How classy. Why thank you, would you fancy some hard anal sex on camera for end up on youtube? Moral: He is keeping it classy...

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-Why is one breast bigger than the other? -because I popped it and all the silicone leaked out

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Your body would look good in my trunk.

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Stable relationships are for horses.

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If you were homework, I would slam you on my table and do you all night long.

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Mens most noob things to say during sex: "Thank you" "Do I really get all this for free?" "Sure you don't want me to pay you?" "MOTHER!" *crying* "You`re wet down there! Did you just pee yourself? DISGUSTING!!!" "I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!" "STOP SUCKING CUZ IM ABOUT TO CUM!!"

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- So what do you do for a living? - I'm a female impersonator.

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Farewell to thy, you have been most amusing. Moral: Has left the building.

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Me. Would you like me to get you a ring for valentines day? Girlfriend: Nothing would make me happier! So I got her nothing...

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Baby! you're on fire! Yeah, well I am an arsonist.

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"You'll do."

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Mario: Ey princess, wanna make the sexy time eh? Princess: With a fat Italian plumber? HELL NO! Bowser: MWAHAHAHA I AM SO GONNA RAPE YOU WITH MY SPINY DICK! Princess: HELP HELP MARIO I WILL DO ANYTHING JUST SAVE ME! NO BOWSER PLEASE DO NOT PUT IT IN THERE! ITS TOO TIGH... Shigeru Miyamoto: So this is how I wanted to make the Super Mario series... sexy eh? Girl: DISGUSTING! Shigeru Miyamoto: Well what do you think about the idea with Monkey Dong and the other girl tha...HEY WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

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- Haven't we met before? - Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic.

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http://scriptsbay.com http://scriptsbay.net

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This doesn't have to be a rape.

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-Are you the sun? -No.. Why? -Because you need to stay 93,000,000 miles away from me.

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guy:do you know how much a polar bear weighs? girl: ..no, how much?? guy:i dunno but probly not as much as you

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Boy: If i can rearrange the keyboard, i'll put U and I next to each other Girl: It's already together dumbass

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hey Herpes Go Away!

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So, I hear you want to rape Nathan Skye's body.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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