- Anti-Pickup Line

Knock Knock... Who's there Want Want who Want who fuck

Do Your feet hurt? Cause youve been stomping on my dreams for 3 years now

Guy: If you look at your keyboard, you see U and I together. Girl: Look underneath. It says JK.

-Do you come here often? -I'm about to.

Woman: Ugh I wish I could remember who you are, I mean you could even have Aids or H.I.V... Man: Hey yo don worry, Dogta tol `d I am positive so thats that Moral: The H.I.V awareness group was a message: We will go literally f/ck ourselves to death have a nice day.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I thought I was ugly, but then I met you

Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

Hey baby wanna come back to my place? Goo-goo ga-ga

is your name angel cuz that's all i see? is your name asshole cuz that's all i see

Do you come here often? Because you're usually working the streets whenever I see you.

Hey baby, I wanna solve your equation with longggg devision! ;)

If your right leg was Thanksgiving and your left leg was Christmas, could i come between the holidays?

-Hi how are y... -just a minute, I need to drop a shit, be back in a sec.

Did you fall from heaven? Cause you d*** sure look like a demon!

Do you want to see something swell?

If you were Mufasa I'd help scar push you off the ledge

How much does a polar bear weigh? On average 1135 lbs.

What did the priest say to the rabbi? We are both religious figures at the head of our places of worship.

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How do you know where gonna have sex tonight.Im stronger than you.

Male: Do you know if there is an airport around here? Cause my heart took off, when I saw you... Female: Yeah? Well my heart crashed in the Hudson River when I saw you!

Heard at a bra: Hi I am Moral man, the third most infamous guy at a list where Beiber is first. Girl: OMG I MUST HAVE YOU! Moral: ooooh... ANTI Joke duh... I thought this was great pickup lines!

At a cemetery: Girl: This place is so creepy at night... I should have left sooner... Man: RAWRGH! BRAAAAAAAAAAINS!!!!!!! Girl: EEEEEEEEEEEEK! (runs away) Man takes off makeup and fake blood Man; Well, I guess that did not work... Moral: If they dont like you while you are alive, there are always un-dead options...

If i could rearrange the alphabet, id violate your ass hole.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!