roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun get in the van

why was the girl stupid beacuse she had brain sergy

I love a girl with a trimmed bush because it makes it easier to see into her window at night.

Lady: Is your name REAAAAAAAAALLY Moral? Moral: Stupid big titted bimbo... seems im getting laid tonight...just like I was today, and by midday and... yeah lie.. I mean brag a lot I do not have sex THAT many times a day... okay I lied again... Anyway vote me for president at least I am honest... well actually that was a lie but...

Hi! Do you like fat guys with no money?

"Do you have a map? I'm getting lost in your eyes." "They always say that before they go to sleep."

-Do your feet hurt? Because I couldn't help but notice you look about 75 pounds overweight and I hear that is rough on your feet.

Are you a beaver? Because your overbite seems to be made for my wood. Moral: Take what you see, improve it, and steal the glory... We all do it... maybe not as obvious as this... but judging me badly would be hypocrisy...

- I'd go to the end of the world for you - Good,Stay There

Are you from tennessee? Cause you've got fine written all over you.

Are you a computer technician? Because you turn my hardware into software.

Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

From 1 to America how free are your tonight? North Korea

-I wish i were DNA helicase so i could unzip your genes. -You're a loser

Hey, i looked up the word beauty in the thesaurus and your name was mentioned there. ..... in the antonyms

Okay, now one where I actually succeeded okay? I know this is not like "goodpickuplines.com nor anything but hey... She: I used to have the nicest goldfish. Me: I got one myself. She: Really? Is it at your place? Me: Duh! She: Lol can we go see it? Me: Sure!... Oh wait... Oh, it died last week :( She: Can we like you know... still go see it? ;) *That sound you get when you score a billion billions on an arcade machine*

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

I am terribly sorry for talking to you, but I was wondering if...

-Your really nice plus i like girls with flat asses

hey bitch

Still a better love story than Twilight

Sex?

Jdkfk

If you were homework, I would slam you on my table and do you all night long.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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