M:HEY BABY! Where you from? W: Im a lesbian.. M: COOL! So which part of Lesbia are you from?

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Yeah, because I landed on a mailbox, and hit the area between my legs really hard. It's a mess down there. Blood everywhere. And something's oozing, but I don't know what the liquid coming out is. *person who spoke first runs away. bystanders laugh*

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so how long have you been a bald ghost wombat?

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Do you work for UPS? 'Cause i could swear that you were checking out my package.

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Does it smell in here or it just you?

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You seem rapable enough... wanna see some back alleys with me?

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Man with huge arms and HUGE muscles enters a... pub! (for variety`s sake) "Hey you like fisting!" Woman: Yeah kinda.. I mean HOLY SHIT NO! I DONT PLEASE STOP NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH! Moral: Get a room you two! (a moral man original)

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do you clean your pants with windex cause i can see myself in them

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Do you believe in angels? Cool, what about goblins?

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If i don't have sex in 30 seconds i'll have to kiss you

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Yeah! Keep drinking girl! Ill just lube your backdoor, what? Dont ask, just drink! Moral: I love it when women call me a pig, all men are pigs, and real women dont want some boy...

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J.B: You smile, I smile. Girl: I wasn't smiling...

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If I asked you out on a date, would your answer to that question be the same as your answer to this question?

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If I had chloroform and a rag, you'd be waking up in a closet tomorrow.

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-Wanna have sex? -No -Damn

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you have your job, I have mine, so let's do it in the kitchen

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Don't turn this rape into a murder.

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—hey girl, how about you give me your phone number and I'll pay half of your order. —sure *passes a paper and paid for the things. The girl walked away* The boy flips open the paper "911, call my dad and ask for me"

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Guy: Can we go on a date? Girl: A date? You couldn't find a date if I handed you a bag of fruit!

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You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear

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I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium were going out and I was like O Mg.

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In a classy bar: KEEP IT CLASSY! Man: Hello there dear... your eyes sparkle like the sun itself... Woman: Oh... thank you random stranger, that is the most beautiful thing someone have ever said to me :D Man: Really? But you are gorgeous (the two proceed to have a long CLASSY conversation and laughing in a classy reserved matter and drinking classy champagne and whatever... and then: Man: Ahahaha yes that is indeed true... By the way... would you mind becoming the single lonely mother of my children? Moral: skipped most of school classes... class ... overrated...

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are you a brush because you just swept me off my feet

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Hey, nice shoes. Where did you buy them ? My girlfriend wants shoes like that.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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