Your so hot my pants will explode if I don't take them off now...

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Woman: You've got the body of a god, too bad that it's Buddha... Man: You've got the face of a Princess, too bad that it's Diana.

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all in all it was a good orgy

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Give me everything tonight, or you might not see tomorrow. RAPIST!

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I AM FAGNETO! WELCOME TO GAY!

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Hey lady, you're really, really cute! Let's go out in the woods, GET NAKED and have sex!

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Guy: Roses are red Violets are blue Girl:Violets aren't blue there violet... dumbass read a book

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Woman: Hey hot stuff! Are you new around he... Man: Eh, I am not comfortable with women hitting on me, even hot ones like you, its just uh... awkward and... Woman: uh sorry, its not like I was hitting on you nor anything ;), Why dont you hit on me? Man: Uh... I err.. how you... uh... *the guy proceeds to stare at the floor for the next five minutes then runs out crying* Moral: NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERD!

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-If I saw you naked, I'd die happy. -If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

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Guy: Do you wanna be the sun of my life? Girl: Ok sure Guy: Then go stand 13. billion miles away from me

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Boy: did it hurt when you fell from heaven Girl: I'm a antsiest

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Male: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Female: did it hurt when they kicked you out of hell?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun so get in the van.

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: What? Him: When you fell out of the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down?

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Does this rag smell like chloroform?

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Those must be space pants, because your ass is out of this world That must be a donkeys tongue, because its making an ass out of you.

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At some random bar: Man: I am Duke Nukem! Woman: DISGUSTING! Man: Huh? Moral: Sometimes you have to play the new games to understand the old...

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Girl - You smell nice, what have you got on? Boy - I have a hardon but i didn't think you could smell it.

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Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn.

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Guy: What're you doing Friday night? Girl: Not you.

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- I can tell that you want me. - Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave.

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(in a loud club) -Do you wanna dance?! -Umm, with YOU? NO! -What?! oh no, i said, "you look FAT in those PANTS!"

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-Can I have your name? -Why? Don’t you already have one?

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-Go on ,don’t be shy. Ask me out. -Okay, get out.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!