Is there someone behind you? cause im seeing people behind your back

Man: hey... you seem pretty paralytic and unable to move in that wheelchair ;) Woman: uh oh...well actually I can move a bit... Man: Good because I do not wanna do ALL the thrusting back and forth... Woman: Bu.. but... I... I do not want to... Man: Well if you do not want sex, then just run away... ;) FATALITY... FLAWLESS VICTORY... RAPEALITY!

Did you fall from heaven? Cause the ground around you looks like it's cracked.

hey i know spanish french german russian and Punjabi. got a talented tongue ;)

Woman- is your penis erect? Male- no just FULL SIZED Woman- woah

If i could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'I' and 'U' together. Really? Cos' I like it just the way it is... With 'N' and 'O' together.

- Have we met? - Honey, we're not meeting now.

-Hey, what's your sign? -I don't know, but yours must be Cancer.

guy scientist: hey can i send a probe to explore uranus? girl scientist: hey can i send a rocket with you in it to the sun/

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put "your sister" and "I" together.

Do you believe in rape by first sight? Moral: I think its immoral enough as it is already.

That King that said: Kill all male babies... Lets say he was a teenager? Moral: Excellent job son, but you see, sharing is caring, have a victory drink!... Thing is... I don't care... rest well...For eternity... Hughman Heffer... The seed has been sown... you got nothing on me...

cockface

-My love for you is like diarrhea, I cant hold it in...

Hey girl, is your name Ethiopian food? Because your playing hard to get.

It's not Rape* If you yell surprise.

HELLO I AM BORAT! MISHIMUSH! I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE THE MOVIE OF MAKING THE RAPE OF THE AMERICAN WOMAN! WILL YOU HELP US? Woman: NO!!!!!! Oh... ok Mishimush! We make the other Movie then, BORAT THE CRUSHINGS OF AMERICA.

The word of the day is 'legs' , The word of tomorrow is Aardvark .

Mirrors can't talk, luckily for you they can't laugh either

-how much do i have to pay you to **** me? -how much do i get for taking you back to the zoo?

Q: Why are Italian girls so hairy? A: Because it turns out its a genetic predisposition in which almost all males and females have when of the Italian ethnicity, these genetics are also parts of other race types.

You're like a can of condensed milk. Short, thick, and sweet.

-Your feet must be tired 'cuz you've been running through my mind. -Yea, I was running away from you.

all in all it was a good orgy

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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