Skilled man enters a bar: Man: Lady, I am a scientist... Lady: So? Man: I also have black belt in several martial arts... Lady: Your point? Man: uh... I have uh... Lady: Sigh... *gets up and leaves* Moral: Knowing what and how to be attractive to women is an art on its own...

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You are so beautiful. You look just like my dead wife. You can come back to my place and the 3 of us can get to know each other better.

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You're so hot that if someone threw a grenade at you, I'd probably throw it back becausemfalling on it sounds like a really dumb idea.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'I' and 'U' together. Really? Cos' I like it just the way it is... With 'N' and 'O' together.

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wanna try out my joystick? (gamer-joke)

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Man and girl talking: Girl: ARE YOU GETTING A HARDON? Man: You think I am a pervert or something? Of course not! Its just the hamster I keep between my ballsack!

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I hate you already.

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-Good thing I brought my library card, 'cause I'm checking you out! -What a shame, it's expired.

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Guy for a girl with a dog: -Does the dog have a cell phone? -Why? is your mom in heat?

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MAN- Wanna have sex? WOMAN- No get away from me you freak?!!! MAN- Well... I gave you a choice...

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Are you cold? Because you're just not hot.

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If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd probably leave it as is, seems to be working OK just fine without my internvention. And imagine the work it'd create in terms of all the re-filing alone. Librarians would have apoplexy, and if I came out I was responsible..well, there'd be hell to pay. No, thank you, but no thank you, the alphabet can stay as it is, no matter how hot your body.

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I put the STD in STUD, now all I need is U.

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Nielsen: Nice beaver! Woman: Thanks! Nielsen: No I mean you have a nice p*ssy Woman: Ah! Thank you! (cat meows) Nielsen: No I mean you have a nice wet vagina. Woman: Is this in the script? Director: CUT! Nielsen: What? Cant a man improvise? I mean OJ does it, and he is quite the nice fella... Moral: "Quite the nice fella" Yeah reminds me of good old dad, nice to everyone, and could take a lot of shit, but as much as I asked him how he was doing, I got an uppercut to the face and a nice trip in a ambulance... Started when I was 4, I crushed his upper Jaw in self defense when I was 16... ah... hmm... Why am I sharing this? Then again why not... When have I not spoken my mind.

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guy:did you fall from heaven? girl:no? guy:sorry, it just looks like you landed on your face

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-I better drive you home, miss. Because you're a woman and you can't drive. Get it?

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Hello I am a violent rapist, oh wait I meant to say my name first and the other much later... Moral: its official you suck!

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I think your cute. I though you were cute, until I saw you...

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Guy: Hey would you like to dance? Girl: No! Guy: Oh come on! Don't be picky. I wasn't!

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have met you before? i like eating my dogs shit.

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Are you from Austrailia? Because I'd like to put my tongue in your butthole

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Did you just fart? Cause it smells like shit in here

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I've got candy.

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put you and that other girl together.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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