- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Male: What's on your mind? Female: How bad you must be at sex.

In regard to the post below. I'm not even joking, one of my mates actually said that to a girl.

Did you just fart? Cause it smells like shit in here

He says: Are you're from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. She says: Well, if we're making bad jokes: Are you from Illinois? Because you make me ill, and when I throw up from your face I'll make a lot of nois.

Jack is riding his new yellow bicycle. His father bought it for his 12th anniversary. Jack is ecstatic to have his first ride down his street. Erick thinks its ugly.

Male - Hey girl, do you want to dance? Female - No. Male - C'mon, lower your standards a little....I did.

Ay Girl. Lemme squirtle on yo jigglypuffs

Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

Boy: So...Um...How's life? Girl: Great, until you came along.

I'm a black belt at pretty much everything, Karate, Larate, Jiu-Jitsu, Kickpunching, Beltmaking, Taekwondo.........bedroom...|:D ~Rick, the Adventure Sphere

Hey baby, I wanna solve your equation with longggg devision! ;)

-How did your date go last night? -It was going alright but then I started crying uncontrollably. -Nervous habit? -Pepper spray.

You're hot, I'm ugly. Lets make average babies.

Hey babe, where've you been all my life. Well let's see, I used to live up north in Newcastle then I moved to Liverpool and I'm just down here in London for one day on work.

No more morals? I read his crap for hours! Moral: ;( Bye man.

Guy: Hi, I am sexually attracted to you. May I walk over to the bar and purchase you a drink and then another and then another untill you become intoxicated and more likely to allow me to have sexual intercourse with you? Girl: You speak funny. Get lost.

Ever had violent sex with a murderer/rapist? ;) ;)

-wow I could just drown in the ocean of your eyes -well why don't you -well I'll steal your sisters number, get lost at sea, and shipreck in her bed Then you can come and save us when she is shouting S.O.S out of the other room

If you were a booger, I would pick up you first.

Is that a mirror in your pocket? Use it next time you put your d**n make-up on.

Try to put your arm around her. If she pushes you away, then say: "Relax! Relax. I'll pay for the first abortion!"

He: Do you like aardvarks? She: No. He: Neither do I, I'm Harold...

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book