on a scale from 1 to 10, when did you lose your virginity?

-Darling, I will never stop pursuing you. Even from the ends of the earth, I will follow you wherever you go. Really, I love you that much. -"Honey", I will call the police and have you thrown in jail for stalking me. Really, I hate you that much.

-can i buy you a drink? i buy you a taxi?

My penis just died. Can I bury it in your ass?

-You wanna get laid tonight? -You wanna never have sex again?

-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? -I'm an atheist.

"You'll do."

Hey! Doesn't this rag smell of chloroform?

I have a really big..... Bank Account

Ps: I was signing books today, and some douche asked me: Are you that Neronism dude on Horsehead? YOu suck! Anyway, Fuck Neronism. Nero (the other one and his "peeps" are fuckups. (Below: Well actually Tina said if my wife can join, just as my wife said yes... ...And you would think that screwing somebody else after asking your wife is immoral... DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE MY WIFE BECAUSE OF WHO SHE IS? Its called trust people *cape flowing in the air moon in background* Trust! NeroMetal I play Street Fighter V, And am an author, and I guess I get laid a lot... AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT NERONISM OR THAT OTHER ASSHOLE IS! I just called myself asshole...

Guy: I believe in women's rights. That's what women deserve. Girl: Oh really? Because I was just gonna go make you a sandwich and get in bed with you, but I guess not...

-Good thing I brought my library card, 'cause I'm checking you out! -What a shame, it's expired.

You look exactly like my sister.

After hearing a pickup line: -I like your approach, now let's see your departure.

- I think i lost my number, can i have yours? - I think i lost my number too.

-Why is one breast bigger than the other? -because I popped it and all the silicone leaked out

- Do you have the time? - Sure, if you have the place!

Boy: Hey girl, do you wanna play hard to get? Girl: No. Boy: That's the spirit!

Happy BirthdaySean!

- Lets get outta here and have some fun - If you got your fathers dick....no

Hey there little girl there is a party down my pants you want to come? Oh I'm sorry i don't speak Herpes.

If you were a booger, I would pick up you first.

I have never dated a horse-faced woman before :)

roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhyming get in the van.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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