- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Has someone been following you? Cause I've been seeing people behind your back.

I have been known to give women the best fake orgasms ever ;)

Man: May I please sit next to you for a brief moment? Woman: Sure :), you`re such a gentleman :). Man: Would you care for a bit of violent rapage in you`re anus?

Man: Your body is a temple! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

Did it hurt? When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down?

He: pick a number between 1 and 10 Her: 8 He: you lose take your top-off!

HEY BITCH! GET YOUR ASS HOME AND GIVE ME A THUMBS UPS AT HORSEHEAD NETWORK! Moral: And be rewarded ;) (unless you are fucking ugly, then you still get the gift of voting me whatever way you want)

- Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason - Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!

- Hey baby, what's your sign? - Dead End.

Male: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Female: did it hurt when they kicked you out of hell?

Hey girl, is your name Ethiopian food? Because your playing hard to get.

-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put 'U' and 'I' together. -If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would take 'U' out entirely.

Hey ladies ;) I like to post lots of anti-pickuplines! ;) Girls: WOW! I WANNA JOIN YOU HOME! ME TOO ME TOO! The anti-part: This will never happen in real life.

Man: Your body is a tempe! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

Baby, I'm no Flintstone, but I can sure make your bed rock...

Hey girl! Faggot.

Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

-There's a 'U' in beautiful. -Yeah, and there's a 'U' in ugly.

Man: Wanna hear a joke about my Cck, nevermind, it's too long Woman: Wanna hear a joke about my Pssy, oh wait you'll never get it

Hey girl, you a single mom I heard, I love that. Really? :D SURE! Hey just between us, how sexy are your kids on a scale from one to over nine thousand? Moral: Watch out ladies, I can only take care of so many of you... (you have kids? Meh, get lost,nothing personal, just you know... your kid)

Your clothes are making me uncomfortable, take them off.

Female: Hey do you wann- Male: You got a purty mouth

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book