- Anti-Pickup Line

Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Boy-That's a nice outfit. Girl-Thanks!!! Boy- It would look even better scrunched up at the end of my bed.

man: would u please me with a blowjob girl: cant u be romantic ? man: would please me with a blowjob at the sunset

-My girlfriend and I want different things out of our relationship. -She wants marriage, children and a house. -I just want out.

Every breath you take Every move you make Every bond you break Every step you take I'll be watching you Every single day Every word you say Every game you play Every night you stay I'll be watching you

Guy: Hey :) Guy: Hey to you too :) Don't jump to conclusions people. They're gay.

Man: Hey, I write the most perverted mini stories on ANTIPICKUPLINE ;) Any woman: ME SO HONNY ME LOVE YOU LONG TIME! Moral: Hentai keeping peop... never mind... not into animated cartoons DO YOU THINK I AM A PERVERT OR SOMETHING?.. cant help it that my mother looks like a damn hot pornstar though...

Wow, Adrenal exhaustion due to overextansive sex... I lost to a woman dude (yeah you too eriksen you faggot) doctor says I need to stay away from any strainous activities at least a while, and hard sex for at least six hours... Six hours is nothing! I lost only the first round! Bahahahahahaha! Remember those ridiculous hentays, no its typing it wrong dont type listen my waifu not my (wife) is quoting me as I am feverish and throwing up and anxious, anyways those animes where bunch of women would win (dunno I did not understand Japanese then, not even the subtitles) pay the rent forever smileyface draw a smileyface (sorry Harry no idea how to draw here) My god, Harris, you know who is quoting me here, she is the fucking stupid one XD yes that is smileyface XD! Anyway, I was defeated here, This "just" some woman, fucked me sick... I am laughing here, I dont care if nobody reads it, I feel sick as shit, and yet I am in heaven... Bakakakakaka... IM NO CHICKEN YOU IDIOT ITS H`S sorry babe, no you moron dont include your name, you are all my miserable pile of secrets kastlevania lol she is tryng as hard as she can to quote me here. Oh and I know you like her, she is red laughing with me here, Wakawakwakwaka yes you got packman right NOOOO mor big OOOS XD Its P A C M A N... XD Why the spaces? Okay, just having fun from this side now, since they are just terrible quotes and not my direct words WITH HORRIBLE LACK OF SPACING I DID NOT SPACE THE HALF THIS, I AM JUST PISSING WAIFU OFF HERE OF IS WITH ONE F! XD XD YES EXDE NO THE SMILEY AGAIN XD Anyway "Harris" Nero is being a bit too Metal here, "abusing himself a bit too much" as they say.. WHO SAYS THAT? YOU SOME PRINNY NANNY? Okay I will shut up, why are you quoting everything? Okay, post it, what you looking at me like that for? POst it? Its not too long! You are making it longer... AND HARDER! cOME ON NOW POST IT... (My God, they do not call this guy Metal for nothing, I know its just Horsehead, but this dude is loco. BITCH COME HERE I AM NOT LOCO I AM INSANO! CAPTAIN INSANO! "THIS DUDE? YOU KNOWN ME FOR OVER FIVE YEaRs YOU SLUT! STOP DARING ME, POST IT ALL AND STOP CAPPING MY LETTERS I CAN BARELY SPEAK coughcough (sound of slime) HEY STOP THAT! Okay her Name is Natalia was it Ember? WIFE NUMBER ONE MAKE HER POST HER REAL NAME SO PEOPLE K (wife Number one here, Natalia Embers, yeah, people as Nero says, so nobody shall messeth with the goddeth of darkneseth and loveth" YES I AM SURE THY SHALL POST IT! WHy remove caplock ffs, XD, now post it, I Nero Metal take full responsability jumå... No more spaces There you go, I Nero "Metal" Lastnameredacted take full responsability for this ridiculously long comment (not my words I think its perfect length just like my dick) And if it crashes this piece of shit sitedotdotdot...yeah those babe. THEN I SHALL BE KNOWN AS THE MAN THAT DESTROYED THE INTERWEBS WITH HENTAI AND SEXHAUSTION! IT SHALL BE LEGENDARY! Seriously, post it, come on, ok we can change the name, its not the name it says, we were just toyi... Will you just post tht thing? No dont remove anything, post it, because I am Insane and insane means 2 wifes and about everyone else... Ok? Ok... Final note: Thou Harris of nameth shall readeth all this a hundred and fifthy say thousand times, or car thy shall be redacted. JAYKAY... No dumbass just kidding, no dont delete it, im having fun, allright allright sorrey I called you dumbass I was taking to "name" that is typing this not you, what you worried about, I am just tired... POST IT COME ON! NO I AM NOT ASHAMED I AM GOD GOD KNOWS NO SHAME SO POST IT, PS DARKGOD GOOD WORK "NOT SHARING MY NAME HERE" GOOD GIRL; NOW GET OVER HERE YOUR FRIEND NEARLY RAPED ME TO DEATH, YES POST IT I DARE YOU! YOU DO NOT DARE ME, THIS COMMENT TRIGGERS THE APOCALYPSE YOU WACKONutS THEN MAKE IT HAPPEN! MAKE ME THE usHERER OF THE END! seriously will one of you please just agree to the terms and nuke the world with this comment? Fine ill do it mysself, HAH THE cOMPUTER IS AGAIN MINE! YOU MUST ALL READ THIS UNTIL YOUR EYEs BLEED BECAUSE THEsE ARE THE WORDS OF.. I dont know, just post it, please? Please do not make me kick your ass out of my room? Thank you very much, ASHAMED? ME ASHAMED OF TYPING THE COMMENT THAT WILL RUIN THE WOLRD? GIRL THY ARE NUTHS, AND YOU REALLY KNOW HOW TO SPELL WORLD POST IT NOW! YEs I AM SURE!

-hey, come here a minute.

I'm an Ice Bear, I guess i just broke the "ICE" between us ....

Can I have this dance? Sure just give me a minute to load my gun

A man comes home from his doctor and tells his wife that he only has 12 hours to live so he asks his wife later that night if they can do it one last time she agrees but after an hour the man wakes his wife and says honey in a few hours I will be dead can we do it again please. So they do it again a few hours later the man wakes his wife again and says dearest since I'm going to die soon can we please? to this the wife says look honey tomorrow I have to get up you don't!

Hey, girl. Looking for a stud? Cuz I've got the STD and all I need is U

I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

Girl: Hi honey, wanna see a magic trick? Boy: Sure, why not? Girl -POOF- YOU'RE SINGLE!

Where have you been all my life?! Said the 78 year old alzheimers patient to his teary eyed wife of 50 years.

violets are blue roses are red you have a mouth start giving me head

You know, you can't spell "stud" without STD and U

Hi! Do you like fat guys with no money?

Girl, wanna fuck rite now? Sure! Man! You are such a hoe! walks away disgusted Moral: Be careful for what you ask for.

Violets are blue. Roses are red. Your window was open. I'm under your bed.

HEY BITCH! GET YOUR ASS HOME AND GIVE ME A THUMBS UPS AT HORSEHEAD NETWORK! Moral: And be rewarded ;) (unless you are fucking ugly, then you still get the gift of voting me whatever way you want)

Me: Hey lady, you are so fucking hot I want to... Lady: FUCK ME PLEASE ME SO HORNY! Moral: One can always dream... yawn Zzzzzzzmooth...

MAN: You wanna know what's beautiful? Read the first word again. WOMAN: You wanna know what's desperate? Read the first word again!

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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