The Non Moral method: "Hi I am the jack off all trades and master of none!" Moral: "Yo, I am the jack of no trades, and master of all!" So uh, Anti Pickuplines are pickup lines that do not work... Hmm, I think I get it... Hmm, no I don't...

H3LL0 Girls, You need some THERAPEY? Call Nero The Moralman For A qualified TheRapist. The number? You wont get it, so then you will go mad with lust and need therapey Moral: Ooooh... I says ANTI Pickup line... Whats that? More Moral: Nothing is immoral! Everything is Moral MORAL MAN!

-Did you just fart? Cause you blew me away.

baby please dont make this rape turn into a murder

roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun get in the van

jack sanders

Hey babe, how about my mom drives us to the comic book store in her Civic? I got a carseat with seat belts for two.

Babe, you Jewish? cuz your on FIRE!

Excuse me, does this smell like chloroform to you?

Girl: Are you a doctor? Because I think I have the flu. *sneeze*

Why did the small girl run away? She saw her own coqu in the mirror.

If your happy and you know it clap your hands!! What if I lost my hands in Nam while I was singing this song and a plane killed my friend causing me to ct off both of my hands?

You must be tired... I assume you are because I am after following you on your four mile run through the park today.

- Are you from Tennessee bec- - Yes

Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

are you on fire?

-words can't describe how beautiful you are. -aaaawwwwwwww. -but numbers can. 3/10. -fffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-

Pee extra hard in a urinal when there's someone else in the bathroom so you don't seem weak

Him: Did it hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Him: When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down

You dont need makeup, plastic surgery is really cheap nowadays!

- Do you have the time? - Sure, if you have the place!

Penis. I got it

He: Did it hurt? She: When I fell from heaven? heard it before... He: No, when you fell from the ugly tree!

Boy: Is your mom mexican? Girl: No/Yes why? Boy: Just wondering.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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