I DROPPED MY LAPTOP IN THE RIVER IT WAS ADELE ROLLING IN THE DEEP ( A DELL ROLLING IN THE DEEP)

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Man: Wow girl, you are so hot you remind me of my wife when she was young.. wanna come to my place for a quick one before she comes back? Girl: Sigh... this AGAIN? I told you! If you are gonna get that drunk, get out of our home and go to a bar daddy!

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roses are red, violets are blue, my toe hurts.

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Did it hurt when you burst through the concrete emerging from hell? Yes, yes it did.

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-Hey baby,what's your sign? (; -Do not enter. >_>

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause the ground around you looks like it's cracked.

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What do u get when u mix a black a guy and an octopus The best dam cotton pickin machine you'll ever see!

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Guy: Have you ever seen a rhinoceros? Girl:No. Why? Guy: So you don't have a mirror in your house?

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your so beautiful im blinded! aww really?! no. i was kidding. im just blind.

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He: Hey bay wanna danc- She: Leave.

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Hey there little girl there is a party down my pants you want to come? Oh I'm sorry i don't speak Herpes.

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if i see you naked i'll die happy Well if i see you naked i'l die instandly

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Boy- Did it hurt when you fell- Girl- From heaven?!? AWWW <3 Boy- No the whore tree when you banged every guy on the way down.

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Hey baby me you CHOIN CHOIN under the moonlight..

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Stable relationships are for horses.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun get in the van

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- Are you from Tennessee bec- - Yes

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Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

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What's a good comeback if a guy asked me "Bring me a sandwich"?? -COmeback with the goddamn sandwich

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are you on fire?

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You dont need makeup, plastic surgery is really cheap nowadays!

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- Do you have the time? - Sure, if you have the place!

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He: Did it hurt? She: When I fell from heaven? heard it before... He: No, when you fell from the ugly tree!

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-How did you get to be so beautiful? -I must’ve been given your share.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!