- Anti-Pickup Line

will you marry me

Are you a speeding, aggressive driver? Because your running straight up my ass

ur so hot, i'd let u put ur vagina inside of me

- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put I and U together. - Would you also change it so that I is an object, therefore making your previous sentence grammatically correct? And besides, I already organized the alphabet so that N and O are right next to each other.

Man, no im still waiting,need to get my kids, hope its fine son, okay punches, captain falcon, but you break my jaw, I wont even ask for you to pay the bill, ill expect it. Man, good times, honestly, i was not even drunk, I was high as shit, never again tho, they did not tell me it was "magic tobacco" until I started seeing numbers NUMBAS! Hey, mind if I come stay sometime? I mean we really miss you son, you always at the fuckhouse now. Just me and... Well the gang... Just like the twelve of us, tell me who you dont want to invite and ill bounce him out for you. Man dog, that chick I punched down was pretty as fuck, she would have been my wife... Anyway just fucking happy finally a real car dude! If she fucks you to death, you gonna go out young and a Legend among gods, let her keep on sucka! (just don forget bout my sis huh? She asks about you too fucking much already) Man, you got me typing almost as much as you dog, anyway is you know, in four hours allright? If not screw my kid, I need a car ill get him a cab.

One hot summer night in 1960, Steve had his first date with Susie. He went to pick her up and her mom answered the door. She invited him in, and asked him what they planned to do on their date. Steve replied that they’d probably see a movie then get a burger. Susie’s mom said, “Well, Susie really likes to screw.” Steve said, “Huh?” Her mom said, “Yes, she loves it. She could probably screw all night.” “Okay, thanks!” replied Steve, mentally rearranging his plans for the night. A few minutes later Susie came downstairs and they left on their date. About a half hour later Susie came running back in the house, her clothes disheveled, and yelled: “Mom, it’s called the TWIST! The name of the goddamn dance is the TWIST!”

Roses are red Violets are blue Go out with me Or you face'll be those colors, too!

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? nwaaahhh blushing or something Because it looks like you landed on your face.

The word of the day is legs. Lets go to your place and spread the word

Are you a magnet because I'm attracted to you No, but I am trained in several martial art, so get the heck away from me

I just shat my pants..... can I get in yours?

Are you from Austrailia? Because I'd like to put my tongue in your butthole

i would drag my balls through miles of broken glass, just to hear you fart through a walkey-talkey

have met you before? i like eating my dogs shit.

On a scale from 1 to 10, can I get your number?

are you a brush because you just swept me off my feet

Roses are red Violets are gold Get on your knees And do what your told

If you were a booger, I would pick up you first.

- Do you have the time? - Sure, if you have the place!

M: You make me wanna be a terrorist! W: Why? M: I so wanna blow on you right now...

Male: It's super hard and long. Female: I have always been under the impression that the GED is relatively simple.

Man: What did you say this horrible machine did look like? Woman: It was terrible it was like a man sized yellow and red robot that shoot lasers! After I refused its offer to come home with him he shoot lasers and destroyed my house... buah ;( ;( Man: That is terrible! Despicable! We have to do something about this! Such a beautiful supermodel should never go trough such a terrible atrocity! Woman: Buah... sigh... sniff... I know... but it was terrible! Man: so so my lady... you can come live with me in my giant mansion and we can have a couple of drinks to calm your nerves and relax... ;) Woman: Thank you Mr.Stark... Man: Oh Just call me Iron Ma... I mean Tony!

A: Did I see you walking out of that bar or was it an angel? :D B: I'm your mom you pervert.

Husband: Honey, I heard that when you die, you come back as a different creature! Wife: Really!? I want to come back as a cow!! Husband: You're obviously not listening.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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