Hey girl, ever tried a double dildo with a man before? ;)

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Hello I am a violent rapist, oh wait I meant to say my name first and the other much later... Moral: its official you suck!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm using my hand but thinking of you ;)

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guy:did you fall from heaven? girl:no? guy:sorry, it just looks like you landed on your face

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Guy: You look two times as beautiful with makup on. Girl: Really? I think you would too.

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In regard to the post below. I'm not even joking, one of my mates actually said that to a girl.

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I am typing it here for exposure which means I am no sellout because I admitt I sell out, just like I did not crash because I admitt I did. This one is real: Me meeting my childhood friend (a girl, with huge boobs... Which she had reduced because back problems... Fucking reduction pointless invention!) Tina: You where and will always be like a brother to me Nero. Me: Aww... Well... Tina: A fucking sexy brother back then... Well and now! Me: O_O. I am married, so I called my wife and asked if its okay, she said can I join? And well, why do you think I am so wired now... ROUND TWO... F*CK!

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Guy: Hey, I think you're really sweet... Girl: Aww, thanks Guy: Is that why you're so fat?

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Hey baby, you're really hot, I like girls with some meat for my bone.

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You smell just like my mom...

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Guy: I think I got lost in your eyes. Girl: Here's a GPS. Go find yourself.

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hey wanna come back to my house, and help me kill my dog?

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You look like a dog... Wana bone?

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-You smell nice Thanks....... -Have you ever thought of turning your sweat into perfume?

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I may have never f*cked a 10 before, but I did f*ck five 2's.

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Woman enters a...uh Cafe that only sells alcohol and stuff... now that is variation from the usual bar eh? Woman: Yo bitchy hot stuff, you look cheap get over here! lets bang! Man: How dare you! Woman: Why? You dont wanna try my wiener? Man: "throws drink at woman", Im gonna tell my girlfriend! Woman: I start getting the feeling something is very wrong here man... Man: Humpf! Just wait to my girlfriend gets here and beats you u... wait I to think there is something very very wrong here. Moral: The world may never know...

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Male - Your a sight for sore eyes Female - And your a sight that causes sore eyes

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Your face is like mace, every time i see if i get blinded

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Boy: You know the keyboard says that U and I are together. Girl: It also says JK

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Man:Yeah, hey yo I'm feelin' like Ray Charles I got my shades on, I don't know where they are You couldn't find me even if you had a radar And I spit rapidly AKAR! Woman: OK ok so you claim to be Ray Charles and all, not that you look like him nor have the same voice... but tell me, how the hell did Ray Charles himself manage to get himself stuck in the ladies sauna room eh? Man: To catch the sight of them boobies! I mean... uh... I do not know young lady, I must feel my way out of here, I hmm... no, this is too soft and round to be a doorknob, and this one is too big and round... hmm... maybe if I try lower I will... oh excuse the pole its my walking stick which I keep in my pants...

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Man: Wanna go to my home and have sex? Woman: Well... OK! Man: Wow you are easy!... wait! Where are you going? COME BACK! Moral: They are not easy, they just like a man with balls... and you where obviously not one of them... LAME OVER.

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Decaffeinated coffee is like a hooker who only wants to cuddle.

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-Hey Baby, wanna date? -No thanks, I'm allergic to fruits

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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