Haven't we met somewheer before? Yes, son.

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Are you a fart? Because you just blew me away.

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Boy: did it hurt when you fell from heaven Girl: I'm a antsiest

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Do you believe in love at first hear? Because ive never dated a blind chick before.

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guy scientist: hey can i send a probe to explore uranus? girl scientist: hey can i send a rocket with you in it to the sun/

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Man: You like nice guys? ;) Woman: No. Man: *bitchslap* get down on you`re knees and suck me bitch!

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When a tractor fell on your face?

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Are you a magnet because I'm attracted to you No, but I am trained in several martial art, so get the heck away from me

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Excuse me, is the red bike outside yours? Because it is parking illegally, I'll have to take your details so I can report you to the authorities...

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Q: Continue the pattern. 1,2,3,4,..... A: other numbers.

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I heard this one in real life in Spain, pretty good one: Man: Please marry me! I am nothing without you! Woman: If you are worth nothing then why should I want you? Man: Uh... Moral: Its a great honor having a dedicated group of followers making sure my comments always have red thumbs, thanks to this my sociology studies are complete. My thanks to every azzhole out there.

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hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

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I hope you know CPR, because you so ugly you take my breath away

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- Grab your coat, you've pulled - Okay, Bye!

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violets are blue roses are red you have a mouth start giving me head

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he got me some KY jelly for valentines day saying it was going to make me the happiest woman in the world he was right one squirt of that stuff on my doorknob and he couldn't get in no matter how hard he tried

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Hey wanna smash pissers?

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Woman: lol you are get nervous when I speak to you! Man: Yeah, I get nervous when fucking ugly attention seeking bitches speak to me, nothing personal its just you being a fucking ugly attention seeking bitch which happens to be speaking to me. Moral: Flawless Victory.

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Him: Breaking through the earth's crust ascending from hell.

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You wanna have sex and get married?? Ok... Sorry.

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the roses were red and the violets were nice but if you want to get with me you better up the price

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A cat falls into a pool and a rooster laughs. Moral of the story, a wet p**** makes a happy c***

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Q: Where did Bethany hide the dead baby? A: In the trash can

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“Why, look at me. I've worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.” ? Groucho Marx

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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