Man: Oh.. girl you smell so nice... Girl: TRY ANOTHER LINE AND STOP LOOKING AT MY TlTS LOSER! Man: Uh... I am blind... Girl: Um...

Moral man: Hey ladies... wanna read my "moral man original jokes?" then you are at the right place! Just scroll down the newest section and you will feel, insulted, charmed, happy, sad, and all that stuff you always wanted! Except beaten up... Moral man do other things to women... BTW I used to write comics (not draw them) for STUPIDO once... well I cant say more... Girl: "Reads": OMG I SO WANT YOU! Moral: If you are gonna like me less (or more) because of the "infomercial" nature of this anti-joke, then you must be the kind that yells to the TV a lot, and throw bricks at the television when it says "this show is presented by" So just do it, prove you are a nutcase, give me that luxury.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I want to F*** you with a rake.

- Hello There Pretty Lady! - Hi... - Wow, your the fist girl I've met who has bigger boobs than I do! - Tw*t

Gaywatch starts

I'm desperate, you'll do.

Pick up lines from the stone age: Fail. Man: Hello, you look beautiful, I speak very well, and if you allow me to make love with you, I promise I will protect you and raise the child with you :)! Woman: WHAT? A guy without wild chesthair that speaks instead of grunting and yelling? You to sex me and you do not even got a club? I am SOOO gonna go to Grogg instead! He has like the biggest club and knows how to really HIT a woman! Moral: I would say somethings do change, but Id rather be Grogg than the loser above, of course I prefer hitting ON women first, if that does not work I... Oh right, I am married :P

Nice hair, can I pull it?

Are you from Jamaica because I'm from Jamaica and I think I recognize you? Your ugly as hell by the way.

I might not be the best looking guy here but im the only one talking to you

Chick:- Don't worry, we all get nervous when we meet people. My brother: yeah, but my buttcrack gets sweaty & smelly when i get nervous!

Man: Hey, you dont look that fucking ugly, wanna go home with me? mirror: *shatters* Moral: If your ugliness ever shatters your mirror let me know, ill look at it and it will assemble itself back on its own.

Try to put your arm around her. If she pushes you away, then say: "Relax! Relax. I'll pay for the first abortion!"

-I know you want to ask me out. I am free anytime. -Ok, then go out.

Hey baby, i like your hair -girl takes off wig

M- Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? W- I'm an atheist.

- So, wanna go back to my place? - Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?

Would you like to come home with me you wetback spic?

Him. "I'd sure like to get into your pants." Her. "No thanks. One asshole in my pants is my limit."

Don't turn this rape into a murder.

Don't turn this rape into a murder.

Why can't Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukemia.

-Hi miss are you a catchup? -hey is this some corny pick-up line?,,,okay fine. why? -because I want to dip my hotdog to you

-Your face must turn a few heads. -And your face must turn a few stomachs.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!