M- Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? W- I'm an atheist.

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him: why are you so gorgeous? her: i dont know i guess my parents had some really good sex.

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GIRL: Has anyone ever told you how hansom you are? MAN: My mother, some of her older friends, and beautiful women your age that I end up sleeping with.

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That outfit looks fantastic on you... ..it would look even better in an evidence bag

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Is your dad a terrorist?? 'Cause you're a sex bomb.

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It's not rape if you say "Surprise!"

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M: Hey bitch i'll give you £50 to touch my penis. f: Simon thats an afterschool detention M: SCORE!

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- I want to give myself to you. - Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.

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Man: Hey you are so pretty I bet you are a hooker! Woman: Uh.. thanks but no.. Man: Damn... I was hoping to get laid tonight...

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What's the difference between a Jew and a boyscout? The boyscout returned from camp.

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Female: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Male: I'm actually a broom in disguise.

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Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I would be in prison.

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-Want my number? -I already know it. It's 1. -Phone numbers have more then one digit... -Oh, I thought we were referring to your IQ level...my bad.

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Do u remember me from middle school? I could never forget you

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Man: So, what's your sign? Woman: Out to lunch. Back whenever!

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How'd you like to earn 14 dollars, the HARD way?

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Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn.

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A: Wanna go get some pizza and then have sex at my place?? B: No.. B: U don't like pizza? Some chinees then?

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male-"Do you have a rape fetish?" fenale-"No, i don't" male-"Ohh... Well you're not going enjoy this."

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Are u in the army cause u make my private stand at attention.

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I have a knife, Maddie. Get in the van.

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M: Woah I am drunk baby... But I gotta say... you`re the hottest bitch in town! B: Bark bark!

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http://pirater-gratuit.fr hacker un compte fb

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Do you wanna be a pirate ship? Because there can be tons of seamen inside of you.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!