- Anti-Pickup Line

On line post: Woman: HELLO! I love you, I am from Russia and find you particularly handsome and rich I am certain you could take care of me and I will do anything for you ;) here are some nice pictures I have never met someone as fantastic as you please contact me! (revealing pictures.gif) additional information: This message has been sent to 100.000 other recipients. FAIL! Moral: And I had not even moved out from my parents home yet... rich enough my ass...

Why didn't the boy make the soccer team? He missed the tryouts

Pooh... my my... it sure its fucking cold outside, I have cooled down now, excuse me while I get back to... My well... Je ne sais quoi... Allright, foursome sex! There you got it, thumb this bitch down because I dont like bragging, but these girls dared me to do it, and we all gotta provide and share ;) Moral: I am the only man of course feck! The alternative is disguting!

You are so beautiful. You look just like my dead wife. You can come back to my place and the 3 of us can get to know each other better.

So, you're a girl, huh?

I just shat my pants..... can I get in yours?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the car.

-Hey, baby, What's your sign? -Stop.

It rubs the lotion onto it's skin

-Can I get your Number? -29435566 (see if you can get it.)

sex me.

Stories from real life part whatever: Me as a twelve year old: Yeah I am incredibly experienced with girls, I mean I know I look very young for a eighteen year old man, but I consider it a advantage of mine... Seventeen year old girl: Really? You are eighteen? Me: Of course, besides II have had intercourse hundred of times, mostly with married women, I enjoy being their "guilty pleasure" Girl: I bet you haven't seen boobs like these though! shows me boobs Me: OMG! HOLY SHIT REAL BEEWBS! OMG HOLY CRAP THEY LOOK INCREDIBLE HOLY SHIT EVERYONE I JUST SAW REAL LIFE TITS! I am a winner! Last thing I remember was getting slapped several times and getting spit on, I was too damn happy to give a damn, I was victory. Moral: had you asked me if it worked by then id say "hell yes!", today I doubt it worked as well as it could have...

Hey baby, I wanna solve your equation with longggg devision! ;)

what goes up and down , side to side all the time? a compass get your mind out of the gudder.

Woman: Hey you look hot and cool, wanna chat? "Man": Meh.. I just stand here with my beerglass trying to look cool in hopes that women ask me out... Woman: UGH! "Man": May I please come with you? Eh... where are you going... HEY! Moral: Trying to look like James Bond in the darkest corner of a bar is not flirting you trucking moron!

B:wanna go out sometime? G:I'll go out now and get away from you.

Still a better love story than Twilight

excuse me my eyes are up here thats great........where are your nipples

HONEY! I SEE MEDUSA!!!!!!!!!!! oh wait, it was just you

showing people this http://hahgay.com/ p.s after seeng any girls want to come back to my place

Hey girl, do you have a map? Becuase I keep getting lost when i try to find your house.

your so beautiful im blinded! aww really?! no. i was kidding. im just blind.

Male: hey sexy whats your sign? Female: dead end!

Excuse me, is the red bike outside yours? Because it is parking illegally, I'll have to take your details so I can report you to the authorities...

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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