-Want to get on your knees and suck my dick? -No thanks, I have enough Tic Tacs at home.

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Yo wazzup hoes? You knew black guys have the biggest dicks ever? ;) Uh, so what? You are white. Oh... yeah... Moral: Damn wiggers.

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I'd hit that.... with a truck.

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Excuse me, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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Man: Hey yo sexy, wanna do it in the toilet so I can brag about banging the prom queen? The toilets are dirty but I got aids anyways and... Fine brit Lady: Eh well sire, you see... SURE! Moral: ANTICLIMACTIC ENDING SUCCESS!

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roses are red violets are twisted bend over b**** your about to get fisted

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Get your coat love. I've got a knife

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hey girl, whats your sign? slippery when wet.

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Do you work at Subway, because you're giving me a footlong. No actually, I once had a job at a local Quizno's Sub Shop. However a tragic fire killed several employees and customers at this very location. I survived, but lost have permanent Third-Degree burns across my body. My life is ruined, prick.

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Hey, you're cute... lets bang.

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If you were a Pokemon I'd choose you!

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Drunken man: Hey sexy ;) what is such a pretty thing doing in this shitty place? wanna come home with me? Nun: I am a nun! And this is a church! Drunken man: I know dammit im not THAT drunk... so what do you say? Nun: Uh... okay...

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-Get in the Van

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- Does this rag smell like ether? - MMMPPPHHRPHRRG!

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Woman: The church is fantastic, I see Jesus wherever I go! Me: I see a psycho wherever you go. Moral: PSYCHO CRUSHER!

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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M - wanna have some fun? F - No! M - 0k, i have no choice but to rape you!

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hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

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Him: Does your dad own a bakery? Her: Yes, Why? Him: Because I saw his advertisement in the newspaper

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"Have you ever seen a 2-incher?"

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" Grab your coat love ...it's cold in my basement"

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Hey baby. Do you drive a slug bug on a rainbow? If so, I'll drive.

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Guy:My tummy hurts Girl: Oh!! Are you pregnant ? Guy: Yeah!!! With a baby elephant!! Girl:WHAT!!!! Guy: Yeah!! Wanna see its trunk

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-Can I get your Number? -29435566 (see if you can get it.)

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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