- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

Man: Hey, you dont look that fucking ugly, wanna go home with me? mirror: shatters Moral: If your ugliness ever shatters your mirror let me know, ill look at it and it will assemble itself back on its own.

He: Did it hurt? She: Aww when I fell from heaven? Thanks! He: No, when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. She:...

-There's a 'U' in beautiful. -Yeah, and there's a 'U' in ugly.

Wow...you don't sweat much for a fat girl.

Hey girl... U remind me of my pinkie toe.. Ur small cite and I'll probably bang u on the coffee table later

male-"Do you have a rape fetish?" fenale-"No, i don't" male-"Ohh... Well you're not going enjoy this."

While I am certain that the police consider you a person of interest, I assure you I do not.

man: wanna know how i know we're going to f**k tonight? woman: how? man: cuz im stronger than you!

Is there a mirror in your pocket?... Because if so, you should probably take it out and, uh, fix what you have going on there.

How about you swing by my place so we can do some complex algebraic functions.

HE ; " MY NAME'S BOND, JAMES BOND" SHE;" MY NAME'S , OFF!"

Did it hurt? Did what hurt? When you fell from heaven.. and crushed all the people below (for a fat girl)

Oh hotness I wanna bang you!

-Hey baby, are you from Tennessee? Because you're like a solid 7.

do you work at subway? 'cause you give me foot long. i'll do you a favour and cut it up

-Does beauty run in your family? -It obviously doesn't in yours!

Girl, did it hurt when you got dragged up all the way from hell? Moral: The hell with morals!

you know what rhymes with hug me LET'S HAVE SEX

She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right." I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you."

Ay Girl. Lemme squirtle on yo jigglypuffs

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book