He i would love to have sex with you She. I know but you have aids

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Your body would look good in my trunk.

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-How much does a polar bear weigh? -It is impossible to know the exact weight of a polar bear where no scale or bear are present.

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-I love you.

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Hey, nice shoes. Where did you buy them ? My girlfriend wants shoes like that.

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Have you heard of that new movie "Other People"? Cuz thats what i wanna see.

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Is it hot in here or are you just suffocating me in this relationship

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my dick is 2 inches

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Hey are you on your period? Because I've been following you and I've noticed there's a blood stain on your ass...

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Are you water? Because you are very shallow. Now GTFO.

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Man: Dayuuuum *slaps ass* Woman: I just took a shit in my pants and you smacked it.

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M. Haven't I seen you some place before? W. That's why I don't go there anymore

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I heard you were looking for a STUD, well I have an STD all I need is U

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The power to type any pointless superpower at the wrong place... ...shit...

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My wife asked me to pass her the lip balm but I accidentally gave her the glue stick, she is still not talking to me.

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Close you`re eyes and open you`re mouth. *unzips pants*

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- I may not be a genie, but I can make your dreams come true. - First wish: don't speak ever again.

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"Have you ever seen a 2-incher?"

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So I caught my sister masturbating the other day, it was like lol hahaha you filthy bitch! Then she was like DONT TELL ANYBODY PLEASE I WILL BUY YOU THOSE BOXING GLOVES YOU WANTED SO MUCH! PLEASE! And I was like, NUHUUUH! The bed is full of piss and I totally got this on my cellphone, so you gonna pull up your panti... Oh you still looking for them LOL! Yeah, that was the subject I brought up at a bar... Sober, unless Redbull counts as drunk... Anti Pickupline as FUCK! Players Dont Use RedBull -Richard Nixon or whatever.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Dont blame me for using moral all the time its just part of my sig...nature XD Moral: Not a pick up line, so its pretty anti.

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Female: Why? Male: Cus you look like an inbred hick

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Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I would be in prison.

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Would you like to be the lone mother of my children?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!