- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet i would pass on it.

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Woman: Seriously you are like the perfect man, I barely even met you and want to marry you already! What is your name by the way? Guy: My name is Le Petite Chessedeburger Withnowhitesauce! Woman: I am gay by the way, gotta go feed my uh... my wife yeah my wife.

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Decaffeinated coffee is like a hooker who only wants to cuddle.

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Are those space pants? Because no one is going to hear you scream later.

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M. you have a sweet pussy. W. WHAT!? M. Your cat, she is very friendly

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I'm heading back to my place. You want to come? Sorry, you strike me as a person who comes all by himself.

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Young Man: Mom.. oh mom I want you so bad! Mom: I want you so bad too son! (starts ripping of clothes) Young Man: Uh... I want you to make me a sandwich... what is going on? Mom: Uh... never mind... Next day: Mom: Hey I bought you some cartoons... Young Man: Huh? I am too old for carto... HEY! :D what is this? What is this Hentai stuff? OOH! Moral: Hentai, the reason asians are smart and families stick together in Japan... sometimes they literally stick together...

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Guy: Hey want to hear a joke about my penis? No wait it's too long Girl: Hey want to hear a joke about my vagina? No wait you won't get it.

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And then it hit me...no really now I'm bleeding

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I like your eyes. My eyes don't like you.

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The below is no anti-pickupline unless you are a Jehova`s witness and want to uh... save my sole or something? Or just read a fun story... Moral: Like pick up lines is something one of them would use... actually they do after I reject their many offers... how? Keep on reading below to find out... its fun, promise. (unless you are a Jehova`s witness...)

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i would traval the earth for you. well then im going to the moon.

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If I could rearange the alphabet id put "I-W-A-N-T-S-E-X-Y-O-U together. SIr, not really but that was kinda impressive. Me: I know...

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If you were a booger i'd pick you first. -that, is fucking disgusting.

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"Hey girl, is there a mirror in your pants?" "No, that's just my penis."

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Your clothes are making me uncomfortable, take them off.

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Man: HELP! I am dying of disease and have only one day left to live! My only wish... "sob" is to procreate... to have a son or a daughter... Woman: Aww... well maybe I can help you... Man: :D I cant believe it (tears in eyes) Woman: What are you dying of? Man: Aids... Woman proceeds to disappear in a ball of smoke. Moral of the story: Dunno find it yourself ffs I dont even know why people read this crap... funny typing it though.. thumbs ups for that :D

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So, you're a girl, huh?

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Boy: Is your mom mexican? Girl: No/Yes why? Boy: Just wondering.

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He: I know all 21 letters of the Alphabet She: Isn't there 26?? He: Oh yeah...i keep forgetting URAQT

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He says "Where have you been all my life" She says "Hiding from you....how the hell did you find me?"

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You look like a dog... Wana bone?

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Would you like to be the lone mother of my children?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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