Hey chicks! I am a very experienced suicide bomber, I was even in the plane that blew up the world trade center A ;) ¨ Moral: This must be the worst pickupline ever for oh so many reasons on so many levels...

thumb_up thumb_down +72

Want to go out? No

thumb_up thumb_down +46

I have a really big..... Bank Account

thumb_up thumb_down +102

Guy: If you look at your keyboard, you see U and I together. Girl: Look underneath. It says JK.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

How much does a polar bear weigh? 1000 pounds

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hey wanna smash pissers?

thumb_up thumb_down -156

Do you wanna be a pirate ship? Because there can be tons of seamen inside of you.

thumb_up thumb_down +105

Woman: ARGH! I hate fist-ing Man: Fist-Ing? THis tiny hand? Nah baby this is mah PINGAS! Moral: Once you go black, you cant go back.

thumb_up thumb_down +142

M. Excuse me Miss. You have seamen on the back of your jacket. W. Are you sure? It could just be Yoghurt. M. Most Definitely. I don't Cum Yoghurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Farewell to thy, you have been most amusing. Moral: Has left the building.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

male: wanna come in for a coffea? female: ok (she has a coffea) male: ok by female: by

thumb_up thumb_down -111

You're like a drug to me. why because I'm so addicting?:) No, because you ruined my life.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Sex?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Hey baby you looking for a stud? Cuz I've got the STD and all I need now is U

thumb_up thumb_down -25

He:*walks over* She: What is it now? He:*Unzips fly.* She : OH DEAR CHRIST NO

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Babe, you Jewish? cuz your on FIRE!

thumb_up thumb_down +94

Stop Footing Around

thumb_up thumb_down +64

Hey nice shoes....Wanna F***?

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Hey... wanna hang out with a guy that thumbs ups his own comments? ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Guy: (any sexual pick up line) Girl: I'm sorry but I don't think there is enough room in my pants for two assholes.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

You must be tired... I assume you are because I am after following you on your four mile run through the park today.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Guy: Ascending from hell and breaking through the earth's crust.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Happy BirthdaySean!

thumb_up thumb_down +165

You're ugly, but you intrigue me.

thumb_up thumb_down +131

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!