- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

- You're so hot, that if you ate a piece of bread, you'd poop out toast! -You're so cold that if you drunk a glass of water, you'd poop out ice.

Boy:can i go out with you? Girl: no

Baby! you're on fire! Yeah, well I am an arsonist.

Hey baby that dress is amazing! It would look even better as a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor!

From 1 to America how free are your tonight? North Korea

A Kid goes to Band Camp and comes back noticeably better at the Trumpet.

Gurl, I'll do you like I do my homework. Slam you on the table and do you all night long!

-how much do i have to pay you to **** me? -how much do i get for taking you back to the zoo?

Would you like a free breast reduction consultation?

Dont let this rape turn into a murder

The Non Moral method: "Hi I am the jack off all trades and master of none!" Moral: "Yo, I am the jack of no trades, and master of all!" So uh, Anti Pickuplines are pickup lines that do not work... Hmm, I think I get it... Hmm, no I don't...

Girl, you must have fallen from heaven...because you're dead.

-Do you like me? -No

Is someone following you? Cuz ive been seeing people behind your back.

Vader getting it on ;): My sexual prowress overcomes even the power of the dark side. Can you even have sex? ... Uh... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Hey Clarkson, you know about this pointless invention Named Nero The Moral man? Clarkson: No. Nero: No. Is this because horsehead network sucks? Clarkson: Yes. Nero: WTF AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE! Oh yeah I am fucking it away... Fuck me, every girl around me just ends up completely fucked.... ;)

I need a fire extinguisher, because my heart is on fire! If you ever talk to me again, I will need a fire extinguisher because I will set myself on fire.

I was a little bit nervous to talk to you at first, but thankfully my Aides encouraged me to do it.

Soon

Close you`re eyes and open you`re mouth. unzips pants

He: Did you fall from Heaven? She: Well... He: 'Cos I got an erection. She: -__-

If you were a booger, I would pick up you first.

Im the demanding customer, your Dominos Pizza, I will make you Cum in 30 minutes or less.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book