Male: What's on your mind? Female: How bad you must be at sex.

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Guy - Hey baby, what's your sign? Girl - ?

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The word of today is "leg's",no whom are i kidding, bird is the word!

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"Is this seat free?" "Yes, and if you sit on it, this seat will be free too"

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Male: Get in the van.

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I'll drop my standards, if you drop your pants ;)

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can i austrailian kiss you, its like a french kiss but down under

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Well there's the exit, will you go out with me?

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Hey girl, do you have a map? Becuase I keep getting lost when i try to find your house.

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Guy: Are you an angel? Girl: Wait till I die, i'll be one.

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

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sex me.

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do you like cows? no! i am a cow! oh!

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girl: i like you boy with downs: i liek trains

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. female: Are you from Delaware? Because I'm del aware that you have a girlfriend.

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HIM: Where have you been all my life? HER: I don't think I was born the first half of it

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wow youre really pretty... just kidding youre fat

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Is there someone behind you? cause im seeing people behind your back

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Nice legs... what time do they open? Cos there is a pungent fish smell and I think you need to wash.

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fancy going halves on a bastard?

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J.B: You smile, I smile. Girl: I wasn't smiling...

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Im gonna rape you..

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"Do you like me?" "Do pigs fly?"

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-words can't describe how beautiful you are. -aaaawwwwwwww. -but numbers can. 3/10. -fffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!