I'm an Ice Bear, I guess i just broke the "ICE" between us ....

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I'm a black belt at pretty much everything, Karate, Larate, Jiu-Jitsu, Kickpunching, Beltmaking, Taekwondo.........bedroom...|:D ~Rick, the Adventure Sphere

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Heard at a bra: Hi I am Moral man, the third most infamous guy at a list where Beiber is first. Girl: OMG I MUST HAVE YOU! Moral: ooooh... ANTI Joke duh... I thought this was great pickup lines!

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The word of today is "leg's",no whom are i kidding, bird is the word!

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can i austrailian kiss you, its like a french kiss but down under

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Hey this is crazy and I just met you so here's the kitchen a sandwich maybe?

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You like my boobies ;) Girl: I said no you disgusting fat bastard! Moral: What fucking kind of MOTHERFUCKING MORAL are you expecting to find here?!?

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Im the demanding customer, your Dominos Pizza, I will make you Cum in 30 minutes or less.

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you work at subway? cuz you givin me a footlong;)

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If you're still here when I get drunk, this is your lucky night.

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Man: Hey baby, I hear you are lesbian, that sounds really sexy! ;) Woman: Take the damn hint asshole! I am a lesbian! Man: Hey! Woah! Relax! I already know where you come from, say, are all girls in Lesbia this hostile? Moral: They are friendlier in south Lesbia...

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-Hi how are y... -just a minute, I need to drop a shit, be back in a sec.

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- Is it hot in here, or is it just the broken A/C unit?

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Hey girl, do you have a map? Becuase I keep getting lost when i try to find your house.

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Dating tips 101: First you find a girl that likes you. Then you realize no girl likes you. Moral: Lesson done.

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Yeah... you'll have to do.

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girl: i like you boy with downs: i liek trains

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"My mom won't be home for hours..."

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Golf.

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knock knock. whos there. interupting cow. inter... mooo!

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You look exactly like my sister.

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Does anyone have a toothpick? I need to pick the crabs out of the cracks of my teeth.

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Boy-That's a nice outfit. Girl-Thanks!!! Boy- It would look even better scrunched up at the end of my bed.

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!