Would you like a free breast reduction consultation?

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So I saw you walk into the bar from the scope of my rifle and I was wondering if you'd enjoy some unconsentual sex in the back of my van?

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girl:go away! boy:okay girl:i need space boy:okay just one meter girl: no i"m not kidding boy:i know girl:my mother hate's you boy:i hate her too.! girl:we are now break boy:okay i"m hungry lets eat! girl:you don't understand me boy:no i"m understand you girl:you are philosopher i hate you boy:what? girl:nothing at the end of the story they loved each other

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I've got a black belt in lovin'.

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Guy: Can we go on a date? Girl: A date? You couldn't find a date if I handed you a bag of fruit!

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Hey Baby, Whats your name? Dave ...(silence)...

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Are your parents retarded? Because you're something special

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- you come here often? -i used to until you came here

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he got me some KY jelly for valentines day saying it was going to make me the happiest woman in the world he was right one squirt of that stuff on my doorknob and he couldn't get in no matter how hard he tried

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-I lost my phone number. Can I have yours? -No.

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rohypnol. rape drug

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you have your job, I have mine, so let's do it in the kitchen

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What's worse than walking on a beach? Not walking on a beach.

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Do your parents have Down Syndrome? Because your really special.

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Good news: you'll never-ever-ever have a zit again. Bad news: because there's no more space for it to pop out.

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M - If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. F - Yeah, it's too bad that N and O are already together.

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Hello I am a violent rapist, oh wait I meant to say my name first and the other much later... Moral: its official you suck!

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I'm your Edward and your my Bella

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-- Hey, can I have your number? -- 12

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How much does a polar bear weight? Enough to break the ice... and throw you into the freezing water and drown you, because you're really ugly.

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Get in the van.

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The anti part of below comment, may be the fact that its going to get thumbed down to Hades. Moral: They see me rollin, they envious... women that look like supermodels that work as jurists dont come easy... unless you are Moral Man. *Plays moral man theme* (Character inspired by Salvador Dali, I mean what greater inspiration than the man that celebrated each day as he woke up in the body and mind of the greatest man ever? Me? Same, but I also wake up next to the greatest woman ever.)

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You're like a star in the sky. Nothing but gas.

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Nielsen: Nice beaver! Woman: Thanks! Nielsen: No I mean you have a nice p*ssy Woman: Ah! Thank you! (cat meows) Nielsen: No I mean you have a nice wet vagina. Woman: Is this in the script? Director: CUT! Nielsen: What? Cant a man improvise? I mean OJ does it, and he is quite the nice fella... Moral: "Quite the nice fella" Yeah reminds me of good old dad, nice to everyone, and could take a lot of shit, but as much as I asked him how he was doing, I got an uppercut to the face and a nice trip in a ambulance... Started when I was 4, I crushed his upper Jaw in self defense when I was 16... ah... hmm... Why am I sharing this? Then again why not... When have I not spoken my mind.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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