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If I said you had a beautiful body I'd be lying.

Male: If you were a booger, I'd pick you first. Female: If you were an ass, I would kick you first.

If i could rearrange the alphabet, id violate your ass hole.

I also got a phd. Awesome in what? Uh wait, is phd and std the same? Wait I mean... Moral: Just leave you dont want to find out the wrong way.

-how much do i have to pay you to **** me? -how much do i get for taking you back to the zoo?

He: If i were a carpenter i would nail you She: If i were a hammer i would hit you

I lost my Nobel prize, can you help me find it?

Pooh... my my... it sure its fucking cold outside, I have cooled down now, excuse me while I get back to... My well... Je ne sais quoi... Allright, foursome sex! There you got it, thumb this bitch down because I dont like bragging, but these girls dared me to do it, and we all gotta provide and share ;) Moral: I am the only man of course feck! The alternative is disguting!

Chick:- Don't worry, we all get nervous when we meet people. My brother: yeah, but my buttcrack gets sweaty & smelly when i get nervous!

You like my boobies ;) Girl: I said no you disgusting fat bastard! Moral: What fucking kind of MOTHERFUCKING MORAL are you expecting to find here?!?

If you were a booger i'd pick you first. -that, is fucking disgusting.

Why couldnt susie see out her window? She was not home, see was to busy drowning in the ocean.

-Are you a dementor? Cuz you just took my breath away... -Expecto Patronum!!!

How much do you like peanut butter?

So, I hear you want to rape Nathan Skye's body.

Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: What? Guy:When I drugged you, then dragged you all the way to my place and banged the hell out of your ass? I also managed to get my entire fist in and out of your ass several times. Moral: Wanna go out with me?

B:wanna go out sometime? G:I'll go out now and get away from you.

Dont let this rape turn into a murder

Close you`re eyes and open you`re mouth. *unzips pants*

Man: Hey baby, I hear you are lesbian, that sounds really sexy! ;) Woman: Take the damn hint asshole! I am a lesbian! Man: Hey! Woah! Relax! I already know where you come from, say, are all girls in Lesbia this hostile? Moral: They are friendlier in south Lesbia...

Is someone following you? Cuz ive been seeing people behind your back.

Guy: I believe in women's rights. That's what women deserve. Girl: Oh really? Because I was just gonna go make you a sandwich and get in bed with you, but I guess not...

Real life: Me at age 17 or something after sex... Me: Thank you! The girl gives me an ugly look left and I never saw her again (whatever she was fugly) Moral: For real guys, never EVER thank a girl for sex!

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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