Do you have Groupon? *wait for response* Because you look fucking cheap

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I'm a bad lover. I once caught a peeping tom booing me.-Rodney Dangerfield

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A. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together. B. Oh really? Well, if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put N and O together. Oh wait -- they're already there. Huh.

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Me 17 years old: Hey, girl, you are hot how old are you? Girl: 14. Me: What but you have enormous... Never mind, uh nice evening huh?... My friend: Big boobs on er huh? I would have hit on her too had it not been for... Me: Shut up... Crap! Moral: That was a crappy day!

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"Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"

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Her: Guess what? Him: What? Her Yo Mama! Him: Is she that slut i did last night?

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Ay girl, those jeans make your ass look fat. Now I'ma get you pregnant while you make breakfast.

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Hey baby, if I could rearrange the alphabet U and I would have sex.

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Man: Hey is your name Zelda? Woman: Huh? What kind of stupid name is THAT! Man: EXCUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSE ME PRINCESS! Woman: What a dork... Moral: The man did not link with the woman that night... nor ever it seems...

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Did anyone ever tell you you smell like Catalina? Did anyone ever tell you you smell like a cat?

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What's a good comeback if a guy asked me "Bring me a sandwich"?? -COmeback with the goddamn sandwich

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Five dollar women... WOO!

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Man - How was your trip from heaven? Woman - Great... until now.

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- you are in my mind everyday - and your in my way

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Are those space pants? Cause there's not enough space in my house to fit your ass.

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Are you an electrician? Cuz' you turn me on.

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Are you a parking ticket? Cause you got fine written all over you.

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"You look like an angel that fell from heaven and hit its face on the pavement."

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hey Herpes Go Away!

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Man: (Ugh worst food ever). Girl: U like it? Man: I love it girl! Girl: Aww, I am gonna make this every day ever! Moral: Hey, if she got big tits, then keep lying.

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Guy: I lost my phone number, Can I have yours? Girl: Your phone service would help you get a new one.

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Your breast is like a beer holder, you would allow me to store beer in between your breasts, while I talk on the phone

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Nice legs what time do they open

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Dont blame me for using moral all the time its just part of my sig...nature XD Moral: Not a pick up line, so its pretty anti.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!