Male: You are a Drugs? Female: Why? because your so addicted to me? Male: Nope, You ruined my life!

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M: What's a pretty girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine? F: Running and screaming for help

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That outfit looks fantastic on you... ..it would look even better in an evidence bag

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Man: Hey yo sexy, wanna do it in the toilet so I can brag about banging the prom queen? The toilets are dirty but I got aids anyways and... Fine brit Lady: Eh well sire, you see... SURE! Moral: ANTICLIMACTIC ENDING SUCCESS!

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Roses are red violets are blue i got a gun get in the van!

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hey Herpes Go Away!

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Are you from Tennessee? Because your accent sounds stupid.

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"Hey did I not meet you at the singles and desperates club?"

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If you were a booger, I'd pick you first.

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Aww seriously dude? That would be awesome, gotta warn you though, this car repair dude, is really ripping my shirt off but you know, ill send you the bill. 666 (my phone is on the charger, get me a new one and ill write a fucking essay about my sisters ass and post it here I really need a phone)

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adam burdass

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How do you know where gonna have sex tonight.Im stronger than you.

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One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door. Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing community service this week.' The cop was happy and left the shop. The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank you' card and a dozen doughnuts waiting for him at his door. Then a Member of Parliament came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.' The Member of Parliament was very happy and left the shop. The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen Members of Parliament lined up waiting for a free haircut. And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it.

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Man: Wanna hear a joke about my C*ck, nevermind, it's too long Woman: Wanna hear a joke about my P*ssy, oh wait you'll never get it Man: It's ok, it was probably too dirty for me anyways.

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that shirt looks nice on you, it would look better on the floor

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Hey baby, let me take you to heaven.

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B: Can I have your number ? G: Sure.. 666

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Sorry, I don't wanna date a guy who's best pickup line is cocaine.

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Female: You're hot! Male: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha get in the van.

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do you clean your pants with windex cause i can see myself in them

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Are you from tennessee? Because your inbred and retarted.

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rape? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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In a loud bar: Man: Do you enjoy gRape? Woman: HOW DARE YOU YOU PERVERT! Man: Uh... how about raisins then... Woman: Err... can you repeat that first question again... Moral: I would but I would have to bypass the censorship somehow...

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I have a knife and a penis. Choose which one goes in you.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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