Boy-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until I heard that horrible pick-up line.

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your boobs are bigger than my nose

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M: If life had Alt + F4, I would close your clothes. F: Really? I would close YOU down!

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-Do your feet hurt? Because I couldn't help but notice you look about 75 pounds overweight and I hear that is rough on your feet.

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Are you being followed because i've been see someone behind your back!

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Did you fall from heaven because you landed on my wind shield some how

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If you were a booger, that'd be pretty nasty.

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- Have we met? - Honey, we're not meeting now.

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Girl: Hey you cutypie! want to ride my newest pimpmobile and get drunk and have unprotected sex? Man: Gee that was mighty brave of you, teehee.. Maybe though, but cant we just get to know each other a bit first? ;) I mean I am a partygirl bu.. Girl: ...Uh, something feels wrong here. Man: Cut! I think we picked up each other scripts... Moral: About mother fucking time someone noticed something! This is anti-pickupline enough for me...

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He: Hey bay wanna danc- She: Leave.

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Female: Hey can i buy you a drink? Male: I have AIDS.

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rape? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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"Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!" "My parole officer would go nuts!"

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*At a concert* guy- hey if you were that drum set, i'd bang you on that stage all night

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Why was the little boy crying? Because he dropped his hamster in the garbage disposal

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- I'd do anything for you. - Die.

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"Are you a parking ticket?" "What?" "You’ve got fine written all over you"

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven and banged every guy on the way down?

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guy: wanna make some money? girl: Na, I do it for free, i'm offering free herpes

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-hey baby wanna get a drink? -no but i wanna get the heck away from you

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-You wanna get laid tonight? -You wanna never have sex again?

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I told my wife I met someone who looked just like her she asked Was she gorgeous I didn't know what to say.

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M: On a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight? F: North Korea

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Woman- is your penis erect? Male- no just FULL SIZED Woman- woah

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!