If I could rearange the alphabet id put "I-W-A-N-T-S-E-X-Y-O-U together. SIr, not really but that was kinda impressive. Me: I know...

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Man, stay alive, I dont even got time to read that shit. See you around son.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Are you a Geodude? Cause you're face is rockin'!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

- hey id like my order for you - ok we put extra punch with it these days

thumb_up thumb_down -81

Girl: Hey you cutypie! want to ride my newest pimpmobile and get drunk and have unprotected sex? Man: Gee that was mighty brave of you, teehee.. Maybe though, but cant we just get to know each other a bit first? ;) I mean I am a partygirl bu.. Girl: ...Uh, something feels wrong here. Man: Cut! I think we picked up each other scripts... Moral: About mother fucking time someone noticed something! This is anti-pickupline enough for me...

thumb_up thumb_down -89

Hey, you want a ride?

thumb_up thumb_down +70

man-hey baby you wanna go somewhere girl-no thanks hells over there

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Roses are red, Violets are Blue, Dont talk to me, and I wont talk to you.

thumb_up thumb_down -96

-Do you mind if i smoke? -No. I dont even mind if you burn....

thumb_up thumb_down +103

-Hey baby,what's your sign? (; -Do not enter. >_>

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Male: Do you know if there is an airport around here? Cause my heart took off, when I saw you... Female: Yeah? Well my heart crashed in the Hudson River when I saw you!

thumb_up thumb_down -47

"Hey girl, is there a mirror in your pants?" "No, that's just my penis."

thumb_up thumb_down -73

My penis becomes hard and hard when I see your mom, but weak when I see you.

thumb_up thumb_down +94

Hey babe, how about my mom drives us to the comic book store in her Civic? I got a carseat with seat belts for two.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

She - Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? becuase your-- He - I did not fall from heaven, you ignorant little twat.

thumb_up thumb_down -124

Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

thumb_up thumb_down +183

Male: Did you get your tickes to the barbercue? Female: What barbercue? Male: The barbercue where i put my meat on your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +145

Guy: You look two times as beautiful with makup on. Girl: Really? I think you would too.

thumb_up thumb_down +103

Is your dad a terrorist?? 'Cause you're a sex bomb.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

I hope you know CPR, because you so ugly you take my breath away

thumb_up thumb_down +71

Guy: Where have you been all my life? Girl: In my room hiding from you.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

-ILY -Aw. Spell it out it will make it more special. -I'm Leaving You

thumb_up thumb_down +116

Let's not turn this rape... into a murder

thumb_up thumb_down -88

You have lovely eyes. They'll look better in a pile on my floor in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +99

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!