Hey i got a job for you. But it blows.

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-So, what are you doing later? -Not you.

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Guy:Are you wearing space pants, cause that ass is out of this world! Girl:No, they're baseball pants, cuz this ass is out of your league.

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He: did it hurt? She: when i fell from heaven? He: no. when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. go put some clothes on.

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Hey did you fall from Heaven? Cos I think you are angel. If I'd fallen from anywhere that high I'd be in hospital with serious injuries or dead. Do the logic.

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A. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together. B. Oh really? Well, if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put N and O together. Oh wait -- they're already there. Huh.

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- I'm a weatherman, and I'm predicting 9 inches tonight ;) - Oh? Well weathermen aren't always accurate, so it's probably more like 3 inches.

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Man: Wanna (censored)? Woman: (Censored) you man!

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Baby if you were homework, I would do you all the time

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Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

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You look just like my sister! That's funny,... CUZ IM A DUDE

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Q: How did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

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I stole this pickup line from Antipickupline.com.

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girl, are you a christian? Sure... Do you believe in me? I dont even know you! Well, met God? No? You love him!

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boy: hey wanna hang out some time?! girl: O MY GOD! r u hannah montanna?!

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- Hey, I have 40 minutes to live and need to feel the touch of a woman to live. -I'm a dude.

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What's your favorite condiment? Mine's mayonaise.

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MAN: Did it hurt? WOMAN: Did what hurt? MAN: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven? WOMAN: Did it hurt when you were dropped as a baby?

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Can I go to your house and play with your Jigglypuff?

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You're like a drug to me. why because I'm so addicting?:) No, because you ruined my life.

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HELLO I AM BORAT! MISHIMUSH! I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE THE MOVIE OF MAKING THE RAPE OF THE AMERICAN WOMAN! WILL YOU HELP US? Woman: NO!!!!!! Oh... ok Mishimush! We make the other Movie then, BORAT THE CRUSHINGS OF AMERICA.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'I' and 'U' together. Really? Cos' I like it just the way it is... With 'N' and 'O' together.

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It rubs the lotion onto it's skin

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Man: Your tag's showing. It says "Made in Heaven". Woman: *Proceeds to leak period blood into a puddle at the man's feet and walks away in silence*

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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