Guy: Did you use Windex on your pants? Girl: No, why? Guy: Because I see myself in your pants.

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Want to get a pizza and fuck? What you don't like pizza?

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He: Let me be the reason you're up all night. She: You will be. I always wake up when I have nightmares.

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Roses are red Violates are blue Get in the van I have a gun.

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause you d*** sure look like a demon!

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- Have we met? - Honey, we're not meeting now.

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He: Did it hurt? She: Aww when I fell from heaven? Thanks! He: No, when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. She:...

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This tux is rented by the hour, are you?

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I'd take you to the zoo but you might be mistaken for an elephant

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This is what Nero calls for his "destroyer" not sure if I should consider that flattering, he thinks so anyways, he just wants to say, that why the fuck are people suddenly scared of looooooooooooooooooooooong messages on the interbewbs. "No leave it be, interbewsbs sounds prefect" Nero The Hero "FINAL FRESH" What Nero And Vagina shouts? :)) Something is off here but he has passed out again :)) "God woman, you suck at pop cultural quotes" Nero, the fucklord (omg, he is crazy, gotta love this guy) "thanks" Nero the grateful. "I Ask you if you know who I am by saying "ITS ME MARIO and you still do not know what name is? THe red plumber Nintendo HIS NAME IS MARIO!?" Nero The (fucking annoyed at me) :)) Sorry guys just having fun. "THOU SHALL NEVER APOLOGIzE FOR THE WORD OF NERO" -Nero insists, I mean the LORD OF DARKNESS INSISTS "Can we fucking stop making quotes of me now? All the girls are laughing at me, WHY AM I SO DEFEATED!" Last quote added without his consent

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Hey babe wats ur sign Caution men at work

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Man: (in indian accent) HELLO I AM VERY RICH INDIAN MAN, I HAVE COLLECTION OF EXPENSIVE CARS AND LIMOS, I TAKE LADY HOME AND MAKE SWEET LOVE TO HER, THEN GIVE HER LOTSA JEWELS AND MONEY! Woman: Cool ill come home with you. Man: Uh... can you lend me money for the bus?

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Hey baby wana come over for dinner? Sure whats cookin? Your dead body after I kill ur ugly face derrp

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- I'd do anything for you. - Die.

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adam burdass

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Are you being followed because i've been see someone behind your back!

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roses are red, violets are blue, my toe hurts.

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Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

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-Wanna go to my place? -Actually, I was gonna ask you the same question. -Really? Where do you live? -In a sexual harassment class.

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I stole this pickup line from Antipickupline.com.

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Order Online Nightwear and short shop online in India

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You must be a parking ticket. Because you are dressed like i'd have to pay.

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Man; Wanna play the rape game? Girl; No Man; That's the spirit

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Man: Hello! I am SUPERMAN! And you are so hot you are my Kryptonite! Woman: then you better get lost before you die! Man: Uh well... yeah uh... walks away (in non super speed strangely) Moral: Think things trough sometimes...

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!