Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

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Is that a banana in your pants? Can I have yours?

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-Hey, what's your sign? -I don't know, but yours must be Cancer.

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Guy: Hey, cutie! What's your name? Girl: JOHN CENA.

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Man: I bet you havent seen a really big dick before ;) ;) Woman: No... but I have seen yours... The man proceeds to stare at the floor and leaves in shame...

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hey girl, whats your sign? slippery when wet.

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Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

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-Adam, am I the only girl in your life? -Who else is there?

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It rubs the lotion onto it's skin

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Moral: Hey, how you doing? ;) Woman: Moral? Are you that guy that signs all his posts on horsecrapz network and adds miscellaneous notes? Moral: Yep that's me ;) Woman: OMG LIKE EWWW! Id never do you! Moral: Uh, when did even make such a suggestion? Moral:Well I am married...

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Woman enters a...uh Cafe that only sells alcohol and stuff... now that is variation from the usual bar eh? Woman: Yo bitchy hot stuff, you look cheap get over here! lets bang! Man: How dare you! Woman: Why? You dont wanna try my wiener? Man: "throws drink at woman", Im gonna tell my girlfriend! Woman: I start getting the feeling something is very wrong here man... Man: Humpf! Just wait to my girlfriend gets here and beats you u... wait I to think there is something very very wrong here. Moral: The world may never know...

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Are you the sun? Because you need to stay about 92,960,000 miles away from me.

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did it hurt ? did what hurt? when your fell from heaven? because it looks like you landed on your face :O

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Fear not moral man is back, in a moment of weakness I let myself go... let us put it this way... some like me, some hate me, that is what happens when people such as I speak their opinion. And if someday the entire world wants to destroy Moral Man... Moral Man will unleash doomsday! Moral: I am back, like me, hate me, you can still ignore me... but until I get some sleep and can start working out again (icy weather is not for bicycling is it?) Then Moral Man stands... Ps: Hey, thanks there below, my most thumbed up comments had minus 5 and such, so I got kinda down since I thought the internet too needed someone that speaks his mind. More Morals: But then I remembered I do this to entertain myself, and that you downvoters can all go screw yourselves! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAN! MORAL MAAAAAAAAN! Action figures in store now!

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On a scale from 1 to 10, can I get your number?

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Hey girl, you a single mom I heard, I love that. Really? :D SURE! Hey just between us, how sexy are your kids on a scale from one to over nine thousand? Moral: Watch out ladies, I can only take care of so many of you... (you have kids? Meh, get lost,nothing personal, just you know... your kid)

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Hi there, stand still, hmm, hmm... Well, your tits are firm, lets feel up ya pussy too huh? Then your... other thingie... Why you runnin? Moral: Believe in stuff!

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HE: You must have some hot buns. SHE: Yeah? HE: Cause you got a real butterface to go with them.

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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Girl: I AM SICK of being with you! All you do is invite me to watch sports, and all you have ever treated me to is a six pack of beer and snacks! YOU NEVER TAKE ME SOMEWHERE NICE! Man: Hey hold one man! Get a grip! What do you mean? Girl: We have been dating for over 3 weeks and you have not made a single move on me! Man: Uh... this is awkward buddy, you see I am straight and... Girl: I AM A WOMAN! Man: WHAAAAAAAAAAAT? Really?! NOOOOOOOOOOO!! I mean you have short hair and the biggest mantits I have seen but... Girl: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! Man; But hey, if you have a pussy that is the important par... Hey where did he... I mean she or... whatever go?

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Man: Hey lady... you new here? I havent seen you around here before ;) Woman: Im your wife! >:/ Man: Which one of them? I have married so many sluts just to get sex with them... that I forget about...

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Hey girl, ever tried a double dildo with a man before? ;)

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You're gorgeous! Can you smell that? Oh god it's awful!

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does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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