M: On a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight? F: North Korea

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Man: Hello! I am SUPERMAN! And you are so hot you are my Kryptonite! Woman: then you better get lost before you die! Man: Uh well... yeah uh... walks away (in non super speed strangely) Moral: Think things trough sometimes...

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-As I slipped my finger in her hole I could feel her getting wetter and wetter, When I pulled it out she was going down on me. I should probably start looking for a new boat...

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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Stable relationships are for horses.

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: What? Him: When you fell out of the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down?

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Hey babe wats ur sign Caution men at work

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I told my wife I met someone who looked just like her she asked Was she gorgeous I didn't know what to say.

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Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

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man: may I impale you on my stake? woman: O.o (for goth girls)

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Dont people ever get tired of PRETENDING like they dont need others aproval? I NEED APPROVAL I NEED APPROVAL! Moral: I REALLY DO! YEEEEEEEEES BECAUSE...Uh...you matter more than me? Nah, nothing like that, only I matter more than you...

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Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

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Is that a banana in your pants? Can I have yours?

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Did you fall from heaven because you landed on my wind shield some how

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At a bar (how creative): Man: I bet you look beautiful behind those tits... Woman: WHAT DO YOU MEAN DONKEYHOLE!?!?!?! Man: Uh... well I mean I really cant see your face and... Moral: Silicone tits are nice too... in MODERATION FFS!

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Me: Have you ever dreamed, of owning a thousand sparkly gems? Woman: No why? You got some? Me: No, but now but now we can dream together t under the sparkling stars under the sky... Moral: Hey, she said aww... And touched my hand before chatting with her friend... and as I turned my hand... was a piece of paper, with a written number...

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Hi, since its our first "Set Time Date" , I want you know I haven't got any STD's

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Are you a Potato? Because I love Potatoes.

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Men. We must always hold the door open, Pull the chairs out and pay for our women whilst remembering to treat them as equals.

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- If i could rearange the alphabet i'd puit you and i together. - That's not necessary because N and O are already together.

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- Did it hurt? - What? - When you were catapaulted from the firey bowels of Hell?

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Hey girl, is your name Ethiopian food? Because your playing hard to get.

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Him: When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down

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- Have we met? - Honey, we're not meeting now.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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