Hi, since its our first "Set Time Date" , I want you know I haven't got any STD's

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hey i know spanish french german russian and Punjabi. got a talented tongue ;)

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You're so hot, you should wear a burkha over your face.

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Hey giiiiiiiiiiirl, I'm no Flinstone but I can make your bedrock.

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Men. We must always hold the door open, Pull the chairs out and pay for our women whilst remembering to treat them as equals.

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How does a ghost walk through walls? There's normally a door.

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- I'd do anything for you. - Die.

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- If i could rearange the alphabet i'd puit you and i together. - That's not necessary because N and O are already together.

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Male: Did it hurt??? Female: What, when I fell from heaven? Male: No, the first time you did anal!!!

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Girl, now I want you to be on top! Okay, what position? DOGGY STYLE! Moral: Sickman Fraud, with that name smart people should listen with one eye open, while geniuses keep their eyes and ears shut.

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Guy enters a bar: Guy: I have some really bad self-esteem and would really apreciate if someone would give me a chance and... Gorgeous woman: Hey, I would love to get to know you, and maybe take you home and... Guy: WHAT? THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN TO ME! I CANT HANDLE IT! HEEEEEEEEEEELP! (Runs out of bar screaming)

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Hey girl, is your name Ethiopian food? Because your playing hard to get.

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guy: do you like sea food? girl: hell yes, I got crabs, would you like some

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boy - would you like to dance? girl - hell no! boy - I think you misunderstood me. I said you look fat in those pants. girl - That's why I said "Hell No!" girl - I'm trying to deny the fact that I look fat in my pants. boy - damnit! girl - Phew!

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"Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!" "My parole officer would go nuts!"

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-"Hey babe, you gotta nice ass!" -"Yep, and it doesn't like a rude one staring at it."

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I told my wife I met someone who looked just like her she asked Was she gorgeous I didn't know what to say.

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guy: wanna make some money? girl: Na, I do it for free, i'm offering free herpes

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- Does this napkin smell like chloroform to you? There is no response because she passed out from it and he leaves in order to void suspicion.

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I might not be the best looking guy here but im the only one talking to you

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HELLO I AM BORAT! MISHIMUSH! I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE THE MOVIE OF MAKING THE RAPE OF THE AMERICAN WOMAN! WILL YOU HELP US? Woman: NO!!!!!! Oh... ok Mishimush! We make the other Movie then, BORAT THE CRUSHINGS OF AMERICA.

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Roses are red violets are blue i got a gun get in the van!

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: What? Him: When you fell out of the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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