- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Man: Is your name sherly? Woman: No... Man: because id like to Fuc* you in the ass and call you sherly

Hey girl, is your name Ethiopian food? Because your playing hard to get.

guy: do you like sea food? girl: hell yes, I got crabs, would you like some

Man: GET IN THE VAN! Woman: NO! Man: Well... How about the Limo? Its got beverages and caviar and... Woman: OOH :D Moral: Always go for the limo first,

Man: I wanna know what love iiiiiiis... And I want you to show meeeeeeeeee! Woman slams man with baseball bat Man: Urgh... ARGH MY FACE BLEEDING EVERYWHERE! WHYYYY! Woman: I love baseball! Moral: Stupid singing idiot, if that is not the worst pick up line ever, then some other is!

There's a reason why they call my penis the Bunker Buster.

- if I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together - If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U next to Y, just why

M. Excuse me Miss. You have seamen on the back of your jacket. W. Are you sure? It could just be Yoghurt. M. Most Definitely. I don't Cum Yoghurt.

As a man I am afforded greater opportunity then my equally qualified female counterparts. I have made it a life goal use this opportunities for greater good.

Man: Hey you female? Cuz I am a horny man and... door slams

“I've been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you.” (Groucho Marx)

Hey girl, ever tried a double dildo with a man before? ;)

Boy: You know, just because one is beautiful does not mean that she is intelligent. Girl: Really? Boy: Yeah. But I'd like to tell you that you're a very good exception. Girl: Do you really think so? Boy: Of course! You're already ugly, yet you're so incredibly stupid!

Ya know what would look good on you? ME!

I'm desperate, you'll do.

what's a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?

Guy: Hey, I think you're really sweet... Girl: Aww, thanks Guy: Is that why you're so fat?

HE: You must have some hot buns. SHE: Yeah? HE: Cause you got a real butterface to go with them.

Guy: If I could rearange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together Girl: If I could rearange the alphabet, I'd put F and U together

Guy:I invented troll face oh yea! Girl:you gave my daughter nightmares for weeks you b****!(throws drink in face)

-"Hey babe, you gotta nice ass!" -"Yep, and it doesn't like a rude one staring at it."

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book