- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Woman- is your penis erect? Male- no just FULL SIZED Woman- woah

what's a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?

Are you from tennessee? Because your inbred and retarted.

F: I AM SO DRUNK AND HORNY I COULD FUCK ANYONE M: Hey, wanna fuck? F: I SAID ANYONE.. Not anything... Heck I got standards! Moral: Heck she has standards! Her dog is someone!

Q: How did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

Women love it when you kiss their neck. Just not while they are driving and while you're in the back seat and when they don't know you...

Guy : your looking well! Girl: awh thanks Guy: You must have shaved this morning.....waaaaaay

Boy-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until I heard that horrible pick-up line.

I have a knife, Maddie. Get in the van.

A blond, a brunette and a black haired girl are all stuck on an island....stupid women.

Hey gorgeous what are you drinking? Cyanide.

Ay Girl. Lemme squirtle on yo jigglypuffs

Woman: Ugh I wish I could remember who you are, I mean you could even have Aids or H.I.V... Man: Hey yo don worry, Dogta tol `d I am positive so thats that Moral: The H.I.V awareness group was a message: We will go literally f/ck ourselves to death have a nice day.

Hey girl, I am a rich guy with a huge estate and stuff, while you live under a cardboard box so... Your place or mine? Both, I to your place, and you to mine.

Wanna come home to my star destroyer and play with my lightsaber? No? How about just a trip down the Enterprise bridge to have fun with my romulans?... if you know what I mean? ;) ;)

Man: Comon babe a little BJ wont hurt anyone get down..... Woman: sorry im alergic to peanuts

-If I could rearrange the alphabet... that would be nice..

Hey, I may not be too smart, I may not have a big dick, I may not be strong nor cool, but at least I uh...

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven and banged every guy on the way down?

Are you from tennessee? Cuz it looks like your missing some teeth.

GUY- Are you from heaven.....cuz it sure as hell doesn't look like it.

Male: It's super hard and long. Female: I have always been under the impression that the GED is relatively simple.

You look just like my sister! That's funny,... CUZ IM A DUDE

I'll punch ya!

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book